by Anna Randol
“That was hardly noble or disinterested. I did it to save my own life,” she felt obligated to point out. For his sake, she should argue his suggestion of marriage.
“You could have disappeared after your first mission and never come back. But you didn’t.”
“Instead, I seduced other men.”
“You did what you had to do to survive. I won’t regret that.” Gabriel covered her mouth when she would have spoken. “I’m a selfish beast. Even though I’m not overly wealthy like you desired, I want you for myself. I cannot stand the thought of a man claiming you who doesn’t see past your beautiful face. In fact, I can’t stand the thought of another man claiming you at all.”
His fiercely possessive speech calmed some of her fears. Gabriel wasn’t her father. “You told me you didn’t want to marry,” she said.
“My sister can’t live her dream because a murderer stole the possibility from her. I’m done letting him steal my happiness, too.”
He wanted her. Even knowing the darkness inside her, he still wanted her.
“Why did you leave the party before anyone saw you?” he asked.
She sucked in two deep breaths. Her heart shouted her answer—what she feared, and yet desired the most.
She loved him.
The words flitted like newly emerged butterflies in her mind, too fragile to speak aloud.
But she also couldn’t deny them.
“I wanted to be with you,” she whispered. Then Madeline tilted her face toward Gabriel. “There’s an easier way to end this. I can’t auction my virginity if I’m no longer a virgin.”
Chapter Thirty-one
With a growl, Gabriel pulled Madeline into his lap, her hip nestling against his groin. But despite the possessiveness of his arms, his lips barely bushed hers.
But she wasn’t in the mood for hesitation. She needed to be claimed. She needed to be entangled in his arms before she could remind herself of the hundred reasons that she was being a fool.
She twisted her fingers in his hair, the short strands sliding through her fingers as she tried to pull him down.
But he wouldn’t allow himself to be tugged closer. “Are you sure about the auction? You’re no doubt emotionally drained by the evening.”
She nipped at his lower lip, trying to delay her answer, but although the muscles knotted across his shoulders, he didn’t respond.
He truly cared about her response.
She smiled at him, feeling at once timid and emboldened. “I’m sure.”
His mouth brushed hers, only to lift a second later. “Then you’ll marry me?”
Yes! she wanted to shout.
But once she did, she’d be stripped bare. A quip with its oh-so-tempting protection escaped. “I don’t know. There are many reasons I might be giving up the auction.”
Gabriel glowered at her. “Such as?”
“Would you want to go to bed with Himbalt even for a fortune?”
Gabriel’s mouth claimed hers. Tasting. Possessing.
His tongue stroked the seam of her lips, seeking entrance. She complied with a moan, drinking in the rich male flavor so uniquely his. If anything, it was more intoxicating this time. She’d thought that with the novelty gone, she’d be better able to control her response. But as his lips trailed down her neck, each kiss increased the tension inside her. It was as if her body felt not only the pleasure of these caresses but also the ecstasy from each previous one.
There was also comfort there, a familiarity that was as erotic as the physical sensations. She stilled, fearing the loss of her newly discovered belonging more than anything. For a woman who’d spent her life in constant upheaval, the emotion seemed far too fragile.
Gabriel pulled back, his finger tucked under her chin. “I’m obviously not doing my job. What are you thinking about?”
She stared breathlessly at him.
“I know your beauty and charm will always draw the admiration of other men.” He cupped her face. “But I need to know that when we make love, my name will be the only one on your lips.”
She clenched her teeth together to forestall her initial defensive sally. Gabriel deserved better from her. She could do this. “I’m yours, Gabriel. I want no one but you.” The words emerged desperate and jumbled. But they had emerged, and that was the important part.
“You’ll marry me?” he asked.
Madeline took a deep breath and plunged headfirst off the cliff. “Yes.”
She had only a brief second to glimpse the grin lighting his face before his lips seized hers. His tongue explored her mouth, as if he wanted to savor the taste of her as she did him.
Gabriel’s finger gently brushed her breast. She’d been touched before, and yet it felt like nothing she’d ever experienced. Not even with Gabriel by the fountain. The protective layer she’d always covered herself in had been stripped away.
His touch felt more intense. More right.
His lips rubbed over the lace at the edge of her bodice where the delicate red fabric met her skin. Madeline’s head tipped back. If his fingers felt like lightning, his lips set her ablaze. The hot throb that had started low in her stomach spread, flooding each nerve with blistering pleasure.
As the coach slowed to a halt, Gabriel placed a lingering, almost regretful kiss on her lips. “We probably shouldn’t scandalize your neighbors.”
She couldn’t let him go. What if he came to his senses and realized his mistake in asking for her? She couldn’t bear it. She needed the happiness to last just a few more moments. “Why not? This might be my last chance to shock anyone before I become a Runner’s boring wife. I—”
“You think being married to me is going to be boring?” Gabriel flung open the door of the coach. His gaze didn’t leave hers as he carried her past the man he’d assigned to watch the house.
Only as they passed her butler did he lift his head. “The auction is over, Canterbury.”
Canterbury’s voice was amused. “It’s about time, sir.”
Gabriel placed Madeline on her feet next to the bed and stepped back, afraid if he held her a moment longer, he’d devour her.
Madeline stood there as poised and regal as a virgin sacrifice. But a sultry gleam shone in her eyes. If she was a virgin sacrifice, she was looking forward to the ceremony.
“Madeline?”
Half of her mouth tilted upward. “I’m working on being respectable.”
Gabriel lifted an eyebrow. “And how precisely does a respectable woman behave in the bedroom?”
“I’m not precisely sure, but from the complaints I have heard, I think it involves suffering nobly while you slake your base lusts.”
Gabriel grimaced at the image. He’d give thanks every day he’d been spared from that fate. “Don’t you dare.”
Her bravado faded and she bit her lip. “I don’t know if I can react like a respectable woman.”
His heart twisted at the uncertainty on her face. To hell with the distance between them. Why did he keep thinking that would do any good at all? Gabriel wrapped his arms around her, resolving to keep her there. “You’re passionate and responsive. It’s part of who you are. And I quite like it.”
“Truly?”
“Yes. And if you ever threaten to be respectable again, I might have to take you over my knee.” His hand splayed across the firm curve of her backside.
The tension eased from her spine and she squirmed against him. “Thank heavens. Being respectable was starting to irk me because I’ve been longing to do this all evening.” She reached behind her back. The bodice of the gown dipped as she unfastened the buttons. The satin slid from her upper body but snagged where their hips pressed together.
He loosened his grip long enough to allow the gown to pool at her feet in a rustling whisper. Gabriel tugged on the laces that tied her stays and tossed that to the floor as well. Her shoes, stockings, and knife followed.
She wriggled her shoulders until the sleeves of her shift lost their tenuous hold. “As long
as I’m not being respectable . . .”
Gabriel exhaled at the bruises starting to form on her chest. He ran his finger lightly over one and then traced the edge of the bandage at her waist, his jaw tightening. “I should have protected you better. Perhaps we should wait until—”
Madeline caught his finger and brought it to her lips. “Don’t you dare stop. It doesn’t hurt any longer.” She laved her tongue over the pad of his finger, then slowly drew it into her mouth.
He searched her eyes for the truthfulness of her words. “Are you sure?” He needed to know that she truly wanted this. But more than that, he needed to know that she wanted it for the same reasons as he did. Not just because of the passion, but because he adored her, cherished her. Loved her.
She unbuttoned his jacket and slipped it off his shoulders. “Does that answer your question?”
No. Not the most important one. “Madeline, I don’t want you to regret this.”
For an instant, her emotions were as bare as her body. “I will never regret you.”
As much as he desired her, he could have stood there, simply keeping his gaze locked with hers for the rest of the night, and never regretted a moment of it.
But Madeline wasn’t content to wait. She skillfully stripped him of clothing, then led him to bed, falling back on it and pulling him with her.
Gabriel slanted his lips along the neat edge of her collarbone, careful to keep his weight off the bandage at her waist.
“Actually, I do have a regret.”
Gabriel lifted himself so he could see her face.
She nipped him on the shoulder. “I regret not doing this earlier.”
With a growl, he flicked his tongue gently over her taut nipple. “I wouldn’t taunt me in bed.” He moved to the other breast, relishing the way her hips shifted with each slow circle of his mouth. “You might find it’s the one place I have the advantage.”
Starting at her knees, he worked his fingers up the silken skin of her thighs until he finally reached the moist heat at their apex. Calling on years of self-restraint, he held his own desire in check as he slid his finger back and forth across the opening to her core. She arched into his hand, but he held back until her breath became broken gasps. Only then did he slip a finger inside her.
His name became a curse on her lips as he continued the same leisurely pace. “I swear I shall kill you for this, Gabriel. And that is no idle threat. I know quite a few ways to—”
He added another finger and then caressed the nub above it with his thumb. “You were saying?”
She moaned. “Nothing. I take it all back.”
Every base male instinct told him that she was ready and willing for him. But willing wasn’t enough.
He wanted her begging. He wanted her stripped of any doubt that they both wanted this. More than food. More than air.
He replaced his hand with his mouth and Madeline screamed in climax, her fingers digging into his hair as she thrust madly against his questing tongue.
Gabriel reveled in each cry, the sounds of her ecstasy dragging over him like a physical caress.
When her hips stilled, her hand moved immediately to his straining shaft. “I need you inside me now.”
He paused at the urgency in her voice. “We don’t need to rush this.”
She gripped him in her hand, adding pleasure to pleasure as her fingers played over him. “Yes, now.”
But there hadn’t been time for the pleasure to build in her again. This wasn’t passion driving her desperation.
“What’s wrong?”
She guided him to her slick center. “Does it matter? We both want this.”
So much that he was questioning his sanity. But if she had any hesitation at all, he needed to know. “It matters to me.”
She writhed, the motion sliding him across her tight entrance, but he wouldn’t yield to his need to thrust forward. Not yet.
“Madeline, tell me. You’re to be my wife.”
“Only until you change your mind!”
Her anguish echoed through him. He rolled to his side and cradled her against him, his fingers tracing the lines of worry on her face. “You don’t need this to bind me. I choose you. Freely. Completely. You will be my wife if I make love to you now or if you make me wait until I’m eighty.”
Her eyes closed, and a tear dripped down her temple and into her hair. When she opened her eyes, the fear was gone. She smiled as she dragged her finger across his lips. “Even if I make you wait until you’re eighty?”
“Yes.”
She pressed him on his back and slid on top of him, straddling him, bringing him the barest fraction inside her. “Eighty?”
Gabriel groaned. “I sincerely hope it’s sooner.”
She shuddered as she rubbed against him. “It was an empty threat.”
He slid his hand between her legs, stroking until the flush spread again over her face and neck and her eyes bored desperately into his.
“Please, Gabriel. Please.”
She would never regret giving herself to him. He would make sure of it.
He gently lifted her back under him and thrust his hips forward.
Madeline blinked at the new sensation. The momentary flash of pain hadn’t made her flinch. She was used to pain. However, this feeling of fullness was interesting. It burned slightly as if she were being stretched too far, but there was also a small frisson of pleasure. Curious, Madeline swiveled her hips, experimenting.
If this had been a man from the auction, she would have been tossing about, panting and pretending to find pleasure while the man grunted and hammered into her. Instead, Gabriel poised above her holding himself perfectly still, every tendon standing at attention, sweat shimmering on his brow, while she learned to find pleasure in their joining.
She loved him.
Her chest ached with the weight of the words, and she almost found the strength to speak them aloud. Almost.
Madeline dragged her finger down Gabriel’s chest to where their bodies joined. He shuddered as if with fever, and that small reaction chased away any residual discomfort. She shifted again, pressing herself upward. This time the motion brought a blissful moan to her lips that she didn’t bother hiding. She lifted her hips again, filling herself completely.
Gabriel spoke through clenched teeth. “I was trying to go slow.”
Madeline dug her fingers into his buttocks when he started to pull away, drawing him even closer, desperate not to lose the sparking tension inside her. “I don’t want to go slow.”
He nipped her earlobe. “Then you’ll have to let go. Trust me, Madeline.”
As her fingers unclenched, he began to move. She couldn’t breathe for a few heartbeats. Couldn’t think. And the glorious thing was, she didn’t have to.
She abandoned herself to being loved by Gabriel and to loving him in return. The first time in the garden had been about pleasure; this was about love. Being cherished. She raked her hands over his back as hot, shattering sensations consumed her.
Ecstasy slammed through her, each wave more powerful than the last. She cried out Gabriel’s name until the deep, throbbing bliss robbed her of her voice.
Gabriel tensed above her, thrusting deep and hard as he found his own satisfaction with a cry. After a moment, he collapsed on the bed next to her, pulling her tight against his chest before planting a kiss on the nape of her neck.
In the safety of his arms, as her eyes drifted shut, she took the biggest risk of her life. “I love you, Gabriel.”
Chapter Thirty-two
When the mattress shifted suddenly in the darkness, Madeline grabbed for her knife. Even before her hand found her bare ankle, she’d realized it was Gabriel, turning in his sleep.
Gabriel’s hand stroked her back. “You’re not asleep,” he said, his own voice remarkably clear and alert.
“Neither are you.”
His hand skimmed over her waist. “Regrets?”
Madeline enjoyed his touch. “No.” And she didn
’t. At least not precisely. She didn’t regret making love to Gabriel for an instant. She didn’t doubt Gabriel would make some woman a fine husband. She didn’t fear in the least that he’d be like her father.
What she feared was her ability to be his wife.
Her first instinct in the middle of the night was to reach for her knife. What did she know about planning menus or mending socks or whatever it was wives did all day?
Gabriel’s arms encircled for her again, pulling her against him. Madeline sighed and settled against the hard muscles of his chest. As he lifted the rumpled linen sheet over them, warding off the chill, his hands skimmed light and nearly weightless over her. When she would have sought out his lips, he stopped her. “I haven’t had the chance to hold you. And if you move, I won’t be able to resist ravishing you.”
Madeline smiled. She wasn’t used to being coddled, but it turned out to be quite pleasant.
She could make this work, couldn’t she? Of course she’d responded the way she had when startled. The need for survival had been ingrained in her. Last night had changed her status as a virgin, not her past as a spy.
Neither had it changed her overactive brain.
“What are your plans for the investigation?”
“I think we need to go back to the beginning.”
The we in his statement was the most romantic thing he could have said. Then she frowned. Shouldn’t she be worrying about him? Nagging him about being careful? But how in the blazes could she be expected to do that when she intended to be at his side? The doubts about her ability to be a good wife returned to the edges of her thoughts. “Perhaps your witness was wrong about seeing the man before. Perhaps he wasn’t the father of one of the students,” she said quickly.
Gabriel nodded against her hair. “Or perhaps he was drunk and drew the wrong thing on the paper. I know. I’ve been playing through every possible option. Your life is still in danger and I have no bloody idea who is threatening you.” His voice was harsh, at odds with his gentle hands at her waist. “I cannot shake the fear that I won’t know who the murderer is until he has his hands around your throat.”
