She shook her head.
“I care about you, Aiden. I care so much.”
Cami’s eyes widened. “I said that to you at the lake. The night you got upset.”
“It brought back that painful memory so vividly, I shut down. I know I acted like an asshole, something else I need to apologize for, but it hit me like a wrecking ball. It reminded me that I had already learned my lesson. Love wasn’t for me. It proved I’m not worthy of that emotion.”
She wiggled between my legs, reached up, and cupped my face. “The fact that you forgave her and tried to have a relationship says a lot about the kind of man you are to me, Aiden.”
“You mean needy and stupid?”
Her hands tightened. “I mean forgiving and strong. Generous and capable of love—both of giving and receiving.” She shook her head. “They were the ones in the wrong, but Aiden, can’t you see you’re allowing them to win?”
“What are you talking about?”
“You refuse to let me in. You keep up walls and never allow yourself to be truly happy. You’ve cut yourself off from the chance of real love. Don’t let her, them, do this to you. Don’t believe the awful things they said and did, because what they said is bullshit. They knew how to hurt you, and that was all they wanted.”
Tears glimmered in her eyes. “Don’t let them keep hurting you. Choose to believe the people who really care about you.”
My throat felt thick. “Who should I believe?”
“Bentley,” she stated promptly. “Maddox. The two people who love you the most. Know you better than anyone.” She drew in a deep breath. “Me. I see the real Aiden. I see the hurt you hide and the need you try to disguise. I see you.”
“How can you think so highly of me after the way I treated you?”
“That’s what you do when you love someone, Aiden. You forgive them.”
I met her wide, green gaze. There was nothing but honesty in her eyes. For the first time, I allowed myself to see what else her stare reflected.
Love. Real, honest love. Not for my money. Not for anything else, except me.
Cami loved me.
All I had to do was reach out, and the one thing I wanted, I needed, all my life could be mine.
I only had to take it.
Reaching down, I lifted under her arms and crushed her to me.
“Mine,” I whispered. “All mine.”
“Yours,” she replied.
I held her tighter.
We sat together silently. I enjoyed being able to hold her. After what happened today and the discussion about my childhood, I needed it. I needed her.
“Aiden, can I ask you something?”
I pressed a kiss to her head. “Anything.”
“Why can you forgive everyone around you, even your sister, but you can never forgive yourself?”
“I’m sorry?”
She tilted back her head, meeting my confused gaze. “You never give yourself a break. If something goes wrong, you blame yourself. If there’s a problem, you always take responsibility. You heap coals on your own head, and you carry too much. What happened in your childhood wasn’t your fault. Your sister’s actions were hers, not yours.” She hesitated. “What happened with Emmy or Greg wasn’t because of you either.”
I tensed. “What are you talking about?”
“I think you’re still blaming yourself for the situation.” She cupped my face. “I heard you, Aiden. At night, when you slept here. The nights I spent with you. Your nightmares. You carry too much pain and blame inside you. You need to let it go.”
I met her gaze. There was no judgment. She looked worried, sad, and unsure. No doubt, she was concerned about my reaction to her words. I thought about what she said.
“I don’t know how,” I admitted in a low voice. “I was blamed for everything all my life. I don’t know how to be any other way. It’s almost easier to take the blame for things at times.”
“You could talk to someone. A professional to help you.”
I huffed a laugh. “You sound like Bentley.”
“Who is a very smart man and loves you like a brother. You and Maddox are family to him. Do you think he would ever suggest you do something that would hurt you?”
That stopped me. She was right. Aside from the occasional words spoken in anger, or disagreement, neither Bentley nor Maddox had ever done anything to hurt me deliberately. Since I met them, they had protected me the way I protected them.
“He only wants to help you,” she added.
“I know. He’s right. I wasn’t ready, though.”
“But you are now?”
“Do you think I should talk to someone?”
“What I think doesn’t matter. You have to want to talk to someone.”
“I think maybe I do. I know Bent and Emmy think the world of this Chloe person.”
“She has helped Emmy. Bentley finds her helpful as well.”
I leaned my forehead to hers. “I want to try. Not only for me. I want to be able to show you how I feel, Cami. To be what you need. I’m ready for that, but I do need some help. Would you . . . would you come with me?”
She slid her arms around my neck, holding me tight.
“Yes. Whatever you need, I’m here for you.”
Cami
“I WANT TO take you home to my place,” Aiden murmured against my head. “I don’t want you here. Not until Dee comes home.” He sighed, his breath ruffling my hair. “Not even then.”
I tilted my head up to study his weary face. “This is where I live.”
“Maybe we can find you a new place. The building we own where Maddox lives has some nice two-bedroom units.”
“I doubt we can afford the rent.”
He smirked. “I think we can arrange something.”
“Aiden,” I scolded gently. “I don’t need you to do that. I’m not with you for your money or what you can give me.”
His eyes were soft, and he slid his fingers over my cheek. “Are you with me, Cami? Even after all I’ve put you through?”
“Yes.”
“Let me take you home. I can’t relax here, and I think you’d feel better too. Please.”
He was right. I was on edge, and the thought of going into my bedroom down the hall made me anxious.
“Okay.”
Aiden stayed close all night. While I talked to Emmy, and later Dee, on the phone, he was beside me, constantly touching my shoulder or arm, wrapping his hand around mine and kissing the knuckles. My heart soared every time he touched me. He huffed a little when I assured Emmy I would be at school the next day; although he gave up the fight quickly when I explained why.
“I need to see my teacher and the director to explain why I wasn’t there for my presentation. I have to get a make-up date.” I sighed. “I hope they give me one.”
“I’ll go with you.”
“You’re not going to beat anyone up, are you?”
“No. What happened, though, is not the normal ‘the dog ate my homework’ excuse. I want to make sure they understand and you get the chance.”
I tapped my chin. “You know, I think you BAM boys are a bad influence.”
“BAM boys?” he asked with a chuckle. “Do explain.”
“Emmy gets involved with Bentley and misses her presentation because she’s kidnapped. I get involved with you, and some madwoman comes after me and I miss mine,” I teased with a grin. “The common denominator seems to be BAM boys.”
“Maybe the common denominator is you girls. Seems to me both of you are trouble.”
“A little.”
He wrapped his hand around my neck, tugging me to his mouth. “A lot. I’m still going with you tomorrow, by the way.”
“Okay.”
He brushed his mouth over mine. “You’re still tense.” He rubbed my shoulders. “You’re safe now, you know that, right?”
“I know.” I shut my eyes with a sigh. “I need a little time, Aiden. The past few weeks have messed with my head. I was c
onvinced I was going crazy or developing the same symptoms as my mother.”
“You’re not.”
“My head knows that now. I just need the rest of my body to catch up.”
“Okay, here’s the plan. I’m going to run you a bath, bring you some wine, and then we’re going to bed.”
“Then I can read to you?”
“I want you to relax.”
“Reading to you does relax me. I want to. Please?”
His eyes were warm, his mouth even more so. “Yes.”
I watched him walk away and heard the water come on in the bathroom. I was tired, but my body was tense. My mind wouldn’t shut off either. Yet, not for the reasons Aiden probably thought. Louisa had scared me, and it was going to take some time to recover from everything that had occurred in the last while, but it was his confession, the things he told me about his life and upbringing that had my head spinning. The fact that he did care, and he wanted to try to be more with me. The look on his face when I said the word love to him . . . he was incredulous, incapable of believing himself worthy of being loved. Unable to comprehend that he could love someone.
Yet, with every gesture, every brush of his fingers on my skin, every endearment, he proved himself to be more than capable. The fierceness of his protection, the need to look after me, it all showed his feelings.
He came down the hall, extending his hand. “Come on, Sunshine, the water is ready.”
I reached for his hand, letting him tug me down to the bathroom.
I only hoped that one day he could say the words.
Once again, Aiden had his body curled around me, his head facing me and his eyes gazing at my face. I glanced down from my Kindle with a smile. “You’re supposed to be relaxing, not staring.”
He tucked himself closer, his head burrowed into my stomach. “I like looking at you.” He sighed as I ran my fingers through his hair. “I like being close to you. To be able to touch you.”
“You can touch me anytime.”
“I’m not good at this, Cami. I have never been part of a couple.”
“Ever?”
“No. I’m going to mess it up.”
I shut the Kindle and gazed down at him. “So will I. No one is perfect, Aiden. We’ll learn together. All I ask is that you don’t shut me out. Talk to me. Share what you’re feeling and let me help you.”
“You help me without even knowing it.”
I ruffled his hair, then smoothed it away from his forehead.
He played with a wrinkle in the T-shirt I was wearing. One of his that was too long, too big, and perfect. A frown creased his face, pulling down his lips, and his eyes grew tormented. “Today,” he whispered, “I-I thought I would be too late. That I would never have the chance to tell you how I felt and what I really wanted.”
“It didn’t happen,” I soothed him. “I’m right here.”
He pushed up on his hands, kissing me. It wasn’t his usual, controlling, passionate kiss. His mouth and tongue moved languidly with mine. He wound his hand into my hair, caressing my scalp, his touch tender. He tugged me down, hovering over me, his mouth never leaving mine. Endless minutes passed as we kissed. Never rough, never forceful, but passionate, claiming, and soulful.
“I want you, Sunshine.”
“Yes,” I pleaded. “Yes, Aiden.”
He swept the T-shirt over my head, gazing down at me. “You are so beautiful. I’ve never told you how beautiful you are.”
“Show me.”
He kissed my cheek, his lips soft. He started at my mouth and slid down, every inch of my body touched with slow, sensuous drags of his lips. He whispered thoughts into my skin, his voice reverent, gentle.
“These freckles drive me wild.” He traced them with his tongue, light and teasing. “Like a tiny patch of stardust on your skin.
“Your breasts are perfect for my hands, Sunshine.” He licked and tugged on my nipples, making me groan. “The way your nipples swell for me, little buds just for me.”
His mouth ghosted along my forearms, kissing the thin skin on the inside of my wrist and pressing his lips to my palm. “Your hands touch me with such tenderness.” His awed and shy gaze met mine. “I had only ever known harsh touches until you.”
“Aiden,” I breathed out, cupping his face, tugging him to my mouth for another kiss.
He swirled his tongue down my torso, his fingers dancing on my skin. He kissed the arch of my foot, teased the back of my knee, and slid his tongue up my thighs. He didn’t rush, and I let him do what he wanted. He would stop and lean forward, capturing my mouth with his and kissing me, then with a grin, go back to the body part he was worshiping. Because I realized . . . That was exactly what he was doing.
He stopped at the top of my right thigh where I had a beauty mark. Lazily, he traced it with the tip of his tongue, making me shiver.
“You like that, Cami? You like my tongue there?”
I gripped the sheet, fisting it tightly in my hand. “Yes.”
He slipped his hands higher, pushing my legs apart. “Is it because you know, once I’ve been there, where I’m going next?” His hot breath drifted over me. “What I’m going to do to you next?”
He had me so turned on; I couldn’t take it.
“Please, Aiden—”
“Shh, baby. I’m gonna take care of you.”
He dipped his head and found me wet and ready, aching for him. He groaned, his mouth and fingers working in tandem. I cried out with the force of my need, but he refused to hurry. Gradually, he built a rhythm, until I shattered, my cries of his name echoing in the room.
Then, for the first time, Aiden made love to me. He showed me with his body what he wasn’t able to say out loud. Pulling me up on his thighs, he filled me inch by inch, claiming the last part of me. He moved leisurely, his hips curling in tight circles, his mouth covering mine. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close, our bodies fused together so tight we moved as one, never apart. We rocked, our eyes locked on each other, desire and need overriding all else.
“Cami,” he moaned. “I need you. All of you. Oh God, baby . . .”
I wrapped my arms around his neck, clutching on tight. Tears spilled from my eyes at his need, the way he whispered my name, his breathless words of adoration.
I felt the tremors of my orgasm begin. I held him harder, surrendering to his body. Giving him everything he needed. Letting him have everything.
His arms became vises. He buried his face in my neck and stilled. A long, low groan escaped his mouth. He jerked, his cock kicking up inside me, triggering my release. I sobbed his name, my orgasm washing over me the same way he had loved me. Long, slow, peaking, and ebbing like the tide.
I collapsed into his chest, spent.
He lowered me to the bed, keeping me close, refusing to release me.
“Sleep, Sunshine. Know I’m here, and you’re safe. I’ve got you.”
I flexed my arms, sated, sleepy, and content.
“I have you too.”
I felt his smile.
“I know.”
Mr. Hob and my favorite teacher, Madame Franklin, were aghast when they learned what had occurred. I was grateful Aiden was with me. I began to talk and became overwhelmed, my voice shaking, and I knew I was going to cry. Aiden picked up my hand and took over when I faltered. He used words I never would have, which made the story seem scarier. Words like perpetrator, terrorized, stalker, and victim, all peppered his statements.
“What is the next step?” Mr. Hob asked.
Aiden frowned in displeasure. “It’s in the hands of the police. Louisa’s parents have been contacted. She is in a locked medical facility.”
“I don’t want to press charges,” I murmured.
Aiden huffed, already knowing my thoughts.
Madame Franklin looked puzzled. “Why ever not, child?”
“I think she needs help, not jail.”
Aiden spoke. “I explained to Cami it may not be her decision, but we will see what t
he police decide.”
“And from us?” Mr. Hob inquired. “What do you need?”
“A chance to do my presentation,” I requested. “I know, usually, once you miss it, you are deducted marks.”
“Of course. No marks will be deducted. The circumstances are rather . . . unique.”
Aiden smirked. “A fact I pointed out last evening.”
We stood, and Aiden shook their hands.
Madame Franklin hugged me. “Come and see me after class, Cami. We will pick a new date.”
“Thank you.”
I walked Aiden out to his car. He held my hand within his, strong and firm.
“I’ll be here to pick you up later.”
“Okay.”
At his car, he bent and kissed me. Sweet and soft. He lingered, his hand resting on my neck, his fingers tracing circles on the skin, holding me close. With a satisfied smile, he stepped back. “Have a good day.”
I couldn’t help beaming at him.
He grinned back widely. “There’s my smile.”
Laughing, I turned and began to walk away, when he called, “Hey, Sunshine?”
I spun around, waiting. He didn’t say anything, but he shuffled his feet and dragged a hand through his hair. I hurried back to him, laying my hand on his arm.
“Aiden?”
He met my eyes, anxious and worried.
“What is it?”
His expression tugged at my heart. Bashful, fearful, yet determined. He cupped my face with both hands and leaned close.
He spoke three small words. Three words that seeped into my heart, stitched the worn edges, and mended the cracked and beaten shell.
“I love you.”
Aiden
I SAT AT my desk, unable to concentrate. I knew I would never forget the look on Cami’s face when I finally got the balls to tell her what I felt.
The words hung in the air between us. For some reason, I couldn’t let her walk away without saying them. Without letting her know how much she meant to me. As they sank in and her expression changed from confusion to understanding, euphoric was the only word I could think of. Never mind sunshine; she transformed into a fucking sunbeam as she clutched my wrists and tears spilled down her cheeks. I had braced myself for the panic, the denial that uttering the words would bring, but there was none. Instead, there was only a strong, abiding feeling of it being right.
Aiden ~ Melanie Moreland Page 21
