“Ready to try it on your own?”
“Sure.” She listened carefully to his instructions, then followed them precisely. She was pleased—and more than a little relieved—when the horse obeyed her commands.
“Another natural,” Slade commended her, helping her down at the end of the lesson.
“Can we ride again?” Jamie asked, regarding the horse with longing.
“Not today,” Michael said. “We have to let Slade get back to his job.”
“I’ll be back around this time tomorrow,” Slade promised.
The boys turned fearfully toward Grace, all of the animation drained out of their faces.
“Will we still be here?” Josh asked, a telltale quiver in his voice.
“You’ll be here,” Grace assured him. She and Michael had some serious decisions to make tonight, but in the meantime, the one thing she knew with absolute certainty was that Jamie and Josh weren’t going anywhere. Not yet.
Unaware of the undercurrents, Slade merely nodded. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Michael walked with him toward his pickup, leaving Grace alone with the boys. Eyes shining again, Josh immediately started in with a blow-by-blow account of their riding lesson.
“It was so cool,” he concluded. “It was the very best thing we ever got to do.”
Grace smiled at his exuberance, but she couldn’t help noticing that Jamie hadn’t said a word. “Jamie, was it everything you expected it to be, too?”
He lifted his too-serious gaze to meet hers. “Nobody has ever done anything like this for us before. No matter what you guys do with us, we won’t ever forget that you were real nice to us.”
She thought she saw him blink back tears before he turned and ran off to the barn, Josh hard on his heels.
“Jamie, what’s wrong?” Josh called out worriedly. “Jamie?”
Grace couldn’t hear the boy’s mumbled response, couldn’t swear that she heard him fighting to choke back a sob, but she took a step after him just the same, then stopped herself. Jamie wouldn’t welcome her sympathy. The only thing that would really matter to him was her ability to find some way to guarantee them a better future. How in heaven’s name was she supposed to do that when an overburdened social services system was just waiting to swallow them up again?
Chapter Six
After a full day of sun and exercise, both Jamie and Josh were exhausted. To Michael’s astonishment, right after an early dinner, they agreed without protest to go upstairs to take baths and go to bed.
They were almost out the kitchen door when Josh turned and ran back to enfold Grace in a hug. Clearly startled by the gesture, she stood totally still for an instant before allowing her hand to come to rest on the boy’s head.
Michael watched the play of emotions on her face—surprise, sorrow, yearning—and wondered for the first time if he had dragged her into the middle of something that she wasn’t emotionally equipped to handle. As usual, he’d selfishly thought only of his own desperation when he’d called her. He hadn’t stopped for a second to consider what becoming involved with the boys might do to Grace.
Despite her tough demeanor as a lawyer, he knew better than anyone how tenderhearted Grace really was, how easily bruised her feelings could be. He also knew just how badly she had once wanted a family of her own, how much she had envied him his large collection of relatives. When she had willingly sacrificed all of that to cut him out of her life, he had finally realized just how deeply he had hurt her.
Worried by the strain he thought he detected, he watched her intently.
Finally, after some sort of internal struggle, she forced a smile for Josh and said in her usual bright manner, “Off with you. Lights out in half an hour, okay?”
“Could you maybe come up and tuck us in?” Josh asked hopefully.
“Aw, come on, Josh, we’re not babies,” Jamie protested. He had remained hovering in the doorway. From his expression it was evident he longed to be where Josh was, but it was just as clear he thought himself too old for such an overt demonstration of affection.
Grace seemed to sense his longing, too. “You may be too big for me to tuck you in, but I’ll come up anyway,” Grace promised, then grinned. “So be sure to wash behind your ears, guys. I’ll check.”
Jamie’s expression brightened at the teasing. He was clearly relieved to have found a way to be included without giving up his adolescent dignity.
“You’ll have to catch me first,” he retorted.
“You’d be surprised how quick I am when I’m motivated,” Grace warned him.
After the boys had gone, she leaned against the counter and sighed.
“Grace?” Michael asked. “You okay?”
She frowned at the question. “Would you stop asking me that? I’m fine.”
“Are you sure you’re not in over your head? If you are, it’s my fault and we need to move ahead with this, get it over with.”
“We’re not going to rush it. My involvement is not your fault,” she said, avoiding the thrust of his question. “I’m here of my own free will.”
“You’re here because I called.”
“Michael, don’t make a big deal out of it,” she said with a trace of impatience. “I’m a lawyer. This is what I do.”
“No. This is above and beyond what you normally do,” he corrected. “You’re living under the same roof with Jamie and Josh. You’re seeing on a minute-by-minute basis how deeply they’ve been hurt in the past. You’re seeing how badly they crave attention and love. It’s tearing you apart, isn’t it?”
“I’ll survive,” she insisted, her gaze daring him to contradict her or to prolong the discussion.
“I think we need to put a stop to it. Let someone else take over.”
“Absolutely not,” she said fiercely. Her gaze clashed with his. “If you do that, Michael, I will never forgive you.”
Michael knew enough to let it go. It wouldn’t help if he became any more a part of the problem than he already was.
“Okay, then. We’ll leave things as they are for the time being. Are you ready to talk about what you found out today?” he asked instead.
“Not just yet,” she said, her attention seemingly riveted on the dishes in the sink. “Why don’t you go on out to the deck? I’ll join you after I’ve finished here and said good-night to Jamie and Josh.”
He nodded, sensing that she needed the time alone to gather her composure. Because he couldn’t think of any other way to help her, he gave her shoulder a light squeeze, took his glass of wine and went outside.
That didn’t mean he could shake the vision of the strongest woman he knew looking as if she wanted desperately to cry. Worse, no matter what she said, he knew he was the one responsible for turning her heart inside out yet another time. What he didn’t know was how to make any of it right…or precisely why he wanted to so badly.
Grace didn’t know how to cope with being needed. Oh, sure, her clients needed her. They came to her during an emotional crisis in their lives, but what they needed was legal advice, an advocate in the courtroom, someone impartial who would stand up for them against injustice. They needed Grace Foster, Attorney-at-Law, not Grace Foster the woman.
Jamie and Josh were different. While Michael might have turned to her for her legal expertise, the boys needed something else. They needed someone to care about them, someone they could love and trust.
Josh, still an innocent at eight, was already turning to her for that. Jamie—older, wiser, less trusting—was more cautious. It was as if he recognized that she might like them, but that she was also in a position to turn their lives upside down again. She didn’t know how to risk giving them what they needed without setting them up for another possible disappointment. All she could do was play it by ear, one second at a time. She would not allow Michael to interfere in that. He’d brought her over here. He would just have to accept her decisions.
The boys had already fallen asleep by the time she finished the dishes and climbed the stairs
. She leaned down and pressed a light kiss to Josh’s cheek, then stood staring down at Jamie. His blond cowlick was standing up, but his face was more at peace than usual. Long lashes were smudges against his pale cheeks. She smiled at those dark lashes. He was going to be a heartbreaker one day soon. He would grow up, flesh out his lanky frame with muscle, and bestow that rare, dimpled smile of his on some girl who’d fall in love just at the sight of it. Grace had the feeling that whatever happened in the next few days would make all the difference in whether Jamie accepted that love or turned away.
“Sweet dreams,” she whispered to him, brushing a gentle hand over his mussed hair.
As if he heard her, he mumbled something in his sleep, then shifted restlessly away from her touch. Grace sighed.
After casting one last look at the Miller brothers, she switched off the overhead light and left the room. Now she just had to go back downstairs and face Michael.
What was she going to say to him? After their earlier conversation how could she tell him that she had no intention of calling anyone, not tonight certainly and maybe not even tomorrow, although she knew the time had come to advise the authorities that Jamie and Josh Miller had been found? Michael would be appalled, not only by her lapse of ethics, but by what it said about her emotional involvement. He already suspected she was in too deep.
Desperate to avoid a conflict with him, she sorted through every alternative she could think of. Maybe she could legitimately buy the boys another day or two here with them through some fancy legal footwork, but after that there would be no choice, she finally concluded with a sigh. Unless she and Michael could come up with another alternative, the boys would have to go back into the foster care system.
Realistically, they would probably be separated again, too. The thought of it broke her heart. She couldn’t let that happen. She just couldn’t.
In order to forestall the inevitable, she would just have to stretch the truth to suit her purposes. If Michael so much as suspected that it was only a matter of time before social services traced the boys’ whereabouts, thanks to her inquiries, he would insist on meeting the issue head-on. It wasn’t that he was heartless, just pragmatic. He would insist that a clean, quick break was the right thing for everyone.
Everyone except Josh and Jamie, she thought heatedly. They needed more time together. They deserved it. No matter what happened afterward, she could give them that.
Outside on the deck, there was a gentle spring breeze, scented with roses. Michael looked up when she walked outside.
“The boys asleep?”
“They were sound asleep before I even got upstairs,” she said with a smile. “All the fresh air and riding obviously exhausted them. Thank you for arranging the lesson for them.”
“It was nothing,” he said.
“Not to them. It meant the world to them. They told me no one had ever done anything like that for them before. It’s very sad, really. It would take so little to make them really happy.”
“I’ve been thinking,” Michael said. “For kids who’ve been bounced around the way they have, they haven’t turned out too badly. Other than running away, I don’t see any sign that they’re bad kids. Jamie defies authority, but what kid his age doesn’t, and he has more reason than most. Why can’t the foster parents see that?”
“He may not be giving them a chance,” Grace suggested. “He may be so focused on getting back to Josh that he does whatever he can to avoid getting attached. I’ve known foster kids who always kept their suitcases packed because they just assumed they would eventually get sent away again.”
“It’s no way for a kid to live,” Michael said with surprising passion.
“No, it isn’t.”
He glanced over at her. “What did you find out today?”
She decided to stick as closely as she could to the truth, as long as she could do it without raising any red flags. “Nothing we didn’t already know. They’re regarded as problem kids.”
“Is anyone looking for them?”
“The appropriate authorities were notified when they disappeared. The police are supposed to be looking out for them.”
Michael shook his head. “I meant does anyone actually give a damn that they’re missing?”
The vehemence of his question startled her. He sounded angry on Josh and Jamie’s behalf. Because he did, she answered candidly. “No. Not the way you mean. The foster parents are more frustrated than worried. I’m sure there are social services people who are good-hearted and who might be worried, but their caseloads are piled high. Jamie and Josh are just two more kids vying for attention on their radar. Runaways are a tragic fact of life.”
“Damn,” Michael muttered. “So, what do we do next? Call up and relieve their minds, tell them that the boys are safe?”
“If we do, they’ll insist on picking them up,” Grace warned.
“And if we don’t?”
“The boys will have a little more time together.” She regarded Michael anxiously. “Would that be so terrible?”
He sighed heavily. “Grace, I can see a thousand and one pitfalls to what you’re suggesting.”
“So can I,” she conceded. “I’m not blind, Michael, or stupid. I’m aware of the risks.”
“But you want to take them anyway,” he said.
“A few days,” she said again. “It seems like the least we can do. You’re here. I’m here. We’re both responsible. If anyone goes crazy, we have the clout to make them see that this was just a gift we were giving Jamie and Josh. What possible harm can come of it?”
Michael shook his head, regarding her worriedly. “It’s a gift that could seriously backfire on all of us. You could lose your license to practice law, couldn’t you? You’re interfering in a court-ordered process. Even with the best motives in the world, keeping them here is wrong.”
“I’m willing to chance it,” she said defiantly. “If you’re worried about your reputation, I’ll take the boys and we’ll leave here.”
He scowled at her. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not worried about myself. I’m concerned about you and I’m concerned about Josh and Jamie. They’re already attached to you. What will happen after a few more days?”
She felt his gaze searching hers.
“And how will you feel when you have to stand by and watch them go?” he asked quietly.
Grace swallowed hard. “It will tear me apart,” she said honestly. “But it would tear me apart now. A few more days won’t make that much difference. Besides, in the meantime maybe we’ll come up with a better solution.”
Michael’s brow was still knit with concern. “I don’t know.”
“I’m not asking, Michael,” she said finally. “I’m telling you that this is how it’s going to be. The only question is whether we stay here with you or I take them back to Houston.”
He seemed taken aback by her defiant tone, but then a grin spread slowly across his face. “Stay here, by all means. When the trouble hits the fan, you’re going to need somebody to stand up and fight for you.”
“And you’ll do that?” she asked skeptically.
“Of course.”
“Why, Michael? You could be rid of all of us, wash your hands of this little inconvenience. That’s what you intended when you first called me.”
“Maybe so,” he agreed. “But those kids have grown on me, too. Besides, you’re here now, back to being a thorn in my side again. I guess a part of me missed that more than I’d realized.”
The admission, even phrased as it was, sent a shiver through her. She’d missed it, too. No one had ever challenged her mentally the way Michael did. No one made her feel as much like a woman as he did. She drew in a deep breath and reminded herself that feeling that way was a luxury she couldn’t afford right now, not with the fate of Jamie and Josh at stake.
“It isn’t personal,” she reminded him, wanting to make that very clear.
“Of course not.”
“I mean it, Michael.”
> “If you’d come over here, I’ll bet I could prove otherwise,” he taunted.
Because she knew he was right, she stayed right where she was. “Not in a million years,” she declared.
“Chicken.”
“Prudent,” she countered.
He laughed. “That’s okay. I’ve just bought myself a little more time to see if I can persuade you to change your mind. I’ve always loved a challenge, Grace. Surely you remember that.”
She did. That, and so much more that it scared the living daylights out of her. For reasons she didn’t care to explore too closely, she still couldn’t help being glad that he wasn’t sending them on their way.
By morning Grace still felt as if she and the boys had been granted a reprieve, even if it had come from Michael and not the proper authorities. As she listened to Josh and Jamie’s excited chatter about their next riding lesson and their plans to explore the rest of the ranch—and to Michael chiming in with an offer to accompany them—she felt an amazing sense of peace steal over her. There was something so right about this, something that felt good deep inside.
“Well, while you all are out having your male adventure, I have a few plans of my own,” she announced.
Three pairs of eyes turned to her. Michael’s and Josh’s were alight with curiosity. Jamie’s were wary.
“Like what?” he asked.
She winked at him, hoping to wipe that worried look off of his face. “It’s a surprise.”
“No way,” he protested, sounding almost panicky. “You gotta tell.”
“Then it wouldn’t be a surprise,” she said. “It’s a good surprise, Jamie. I promise. Now, go on. Get ready to go exploring. I’ll even pack you all a picnic lunch.”
Jamie cast one last worried look in her direction before eventually following Josh upstairs. That left Michael watching her intently.
“What do you have up your sleeve?”
“You’ll see.”
“You don’t intend to tell me, either?”
“You might blab.”
“I am the very soul of discretion, I’ll have you know. Nothing gets past my lips, unless I want it to.”
Marrying a Delacourt Page 7
