by Anthology
I screamed in terror as I sat straight up. I turned on my bedside lamp, and then a better idea popped into my mind. I picked it up, still plugged in, as I prepared to launch it at whoever was in my bedroom.
“Whoa! Calm down. It’s just me.”
I raised the lamp higher over my head, and Alec came into view.
“What the hell are you doing in my apartment?” I shouted.
“I knocked, but you didn’t answer. I tried the door, and it was unlocked. Leaving your door like that isn’t smart, especially for a woman living on her own. You need to be more careful.”
“I didn’t realize I’d left it unlocked,” I grumbled. “That still doesn’t give you the right to come into my apartment. Leave. Now.”
Instead of leaving, he stepped closer. I almost screamed in aggravation. I could only imagine how bad I looked in my pajamas with wet hair and a puffy face from crying. I was shocked that he hadn’t run the second he’d seen me like that.
He cursed under his breath as he sat down on the end of my bed. “You’re crying.”
I wiped my eyes with my free hand. “No, I’m not.”
He sighed. “Yes, you are, and it’s my fault. I’m sorry that I made you cry. I wasn’t trying to hurt you tonight. I was trying to protect you.”
I snorted. “I don’t need protection, especially not from someone like you.”
“But you do. You’re a good girl, Rebecca. You don’t need to get mixed up with someone like me.”
“I’m so tired of everyone telling me I’m such a good girl!” I shouted. “And I had no intention of getting mixed up with you. We were dancing. That was it. You were the one that decided to kiss me. Don’t you dare blame me for something you did.”
“But you are a good girl. You’re so innocent that it comes off of you in waves. And you’re right—that kiss was my fault. I couldn’t stop myself.”
“Obviously, you came to your senses.” I sighed. “Look, I’m over it. Can we just let it go?”
He shook his head. “No, I can’t.”
“Why not?” I demanded. I couldn’t stand to talk about this any longer. I just wanted him to go away.
“Because it’s killing me to know that I hurt you. What I did was stupid. I knew what I was doing, but no matter how hard I fought it, I couldn’t stop myself. I never meant to hurt you, Rebecca. I’m so sorry for that, but it was for the best. Girls like you can’t survive guys like me.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
He frowned. “I’ve always been that guy—the one who fucks women with no strings attached and moves on. You’re not the kind of girl who could settle for that, and I led you on tonight.”
“I have no interest in having sex with you,” I lied. “I just wanted to dance. Look, I accept your apology. Can we please drop this whole subject? I’m over it.”
He stared at me for a minute. “Yeah, let’s just pretend that tonight didn’t happen. Friends?”
I almost laughed, but I caught myself at the last second. “Yeah, friends sounds good.”
Even as the words left my mouth, I knew being friends with him would be damn near impossible. I was attracted to him, and after tonight, it was ten times worse. It didn’t even matter that he’d been an ass to me.
“Good.” He paused. “I guess I’ll let you go back to bed.”
“Night,” I whispered.
He stood and walked to my door. “Good night, Rebecca. I’ll make sure to lock the door when I leave.”
Once he left, I turned my light back off and started crying all over again. I was starting to wonder if I would end up falling for Alec or hating him. At this point, it could go either way.
***
IT’D BEEN A WEEK since that night, and I hadn’t heard a word from Alec. I hadn’t even seen him in passing. Part of me was relieved that I didn’t have to deal with him, but part of me missed him. It was stupid to miss someone I barely knew. I kept reminding myself that it was a good thing. Every time I thought of him, the night at his bar would pop into my head. It was better that I hadn’t seen him. It had saved me a lot of embarrassment. Still, I would find myself taking my time as I walked out to my car every morning, hoping that I’d see him. It was pathetic. I didn’t even know which car was his to see if he was home or not.
Trying to push him from my mind, I focused on work. It helped a lot of the time. I was slowly getting used to teaching on my own. My students seemed to like me. I had a few who would give me a hard time, but I was slowly wearing them down. Every time they smarted off, I would make sure to call on them several times during the rest of class. Since most of them didn’t want to be the center of attention, they would stop acting like brats.
Arie had called me almost every day since Friday night, trying to get me to go out for dinner or even a movie, but I’d refused every time. After my last disastrous attempt at having a life, I decided that I would be safer staying in at night. I knew she felt bad for what had happened, but I assured her that it wasn’t her fault and that I wasn’t upset with her. I didn’t think she believed me though.
A knock on my door pulled me back to the present. I put the papers I had been trying to grade on my coffee table. I’d ordered pizza, so I grabbed my purse and pulled out a few bills before opening the door. I froze when I saw Alec standing there with a pizza box in his hands.
I raised an eyebrow. “Let me guess. You own a pizza place, too.”
He grinned. “Nah, I saw the dude walking to your door. I thought I’d pay for it, so I had an excuse to talk to you.”
“You didn’t have to buy my dinner to talk to me. All you had to do was walk across the hall and knock on my door.”
“I wasn’t sure you’d answer. I knew if I had food, you’d have to.” He smirked at me.
Ah, there’s that smirk I love to hate.
“Good point. I’d never slam the door in food’s face,” I joked.
I held out my hands, and he gave me the pizza. We stood there awkwardly, neither of us sure what to say next.
“Do you want to come in?” I finally said.
“I thought you’d never ask.” He stepped into my apartment.
I closed the door before following him to the couch.
He sat down and picked up the stack of papers I’d been grading. “What’s this?”
“A one-page report on the Revolutionary War. I have to say, grading homework is probably my least favorite thing about teaching. I have to keep searching random phrases online to make sure they didn’t plagiarize. The little shits are smart.”
He chuckled. “When I was in school, I had dial-up. It would’ve taken me longer to copy something online than to write the paper myself.”
“Careful, you’re telling your age, old man.”
I put the pizza down on the table and opened the lid. I picked up a piece and gestured for Alec to do the same. I watched him out of the corner of my eye as I took a bite. He looked relaxed as he ate. I couldn’t help but notice the difference in his attitude now compared to when we’d first met.
“Why did you act like an asshole in the hallway that first day?” I asked him.
He frowned. “I already told you why. I know your type, Rebecca, and I saw the way you were looking at me. It was better to scare you off and be done with it.”
“So, you don’t normally act like that?” I asked.
He grinned. “No, I do.”
I sighed. “You’re so confusing. I hope you know that. If you’re normally an ass, why weren’t you being one that night? Why aren’t you being one now? The guy I met in the hallway would never have cared enough to break into my apartment to apologize.”
“I didn’t technically break in. I just opened the door,” he pointed out. “I don’t know why I’m being nice to you now. Maybe I’m just hoping that we’ll end up as friends.”
“Are you normally friends with chicks?”
He hesitated. “Not usually.”
“Then, what’s so different about me?”
/>
He seemed thoughtful. “I don’t know.”
We were quiet for a while, both of us lost in our thoughts. I nibbled on my pizza as I tried to figure Alec out. He was a walking contradiction. He’d claimed to be an asshole, and I’d been a witness to more than one episode proving that, but there were times when I’d wondered if he was really as bad as he acted. An ass would never have apologized for what he’d done to me. He wouldn’t be sitting here with me now, eating pizza, like it was a normal thing for us to do on a Friday night.
“Why aren’t you working?” I asked.
He shrugged. “I had some personal shit to take care of, so I called off work yesterday and today. What are they going to do? Fire me?”
“What kind of personal stuff?” I asked, unable to stop myself. I knew next to nothing about Alec, and I was curious. I knew I shouldn’t try to get to know him better, but when he was around, I couldn’t seem to remember that I needed to distance myself.
He looked away but not before I saw the pain in his eyes.
“My dad has cancer, and he isn’t doing very good. I went to see him and get his affairs in order.”
If I hadn’t seen the pain in his eyes, I would have heard it in his voice. Without thinking, I reached out and took his hand in mine. He looked down at our joined hands and lightly squeezed mine.
“I’m so sorry, Alec. I didn’t mean to pry, especially with something so painful.”
He shrugged. “It’s okay. It sucks, but it is what it is. My dad and I have never been close. He worked all the time when I was growing up. I was mostly raised by nannies.” He chuckled, but it was humorless. “My dad and I found out about his cancer almost a year ago. I think I’ve spent more time with him since then than I ever have before.”
“Is he receiving radiation or chemo?” I asked.
He shook his head. “It’s inoperable, and he’s refused any other treatments. I’m surprised he’s made it this long. It’s only a matter of time, probably weeks, until he goes.”
“My mom is a doctor. I could call her, and maybe she could look at his records and see if there’s anything else she might suggest,” I said, desperate to help him.
He squeezed my hand again. “There’s no point. He’s ready to go, Rebecca. I think he’s been ready since we lost my mom when I was little. I’m not going to spend the last few weeks of his life fighting with him over it. I respect his wishes.”
I closed my eyes, trying to hold back my tears. I felt so helpless. All I wanted to do was make things better for Alec, but there was nothing I could do.
“Hey, don’t cry. It’s okay, really. I’ve accepted it.”
“I can’t help it.” I sniffled.
He pulled me into his arms, shocking me. “You know, I hate it when you cry. Please stop, or I’ll do something drastic.”
“Like what? Hit on me?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood. It might have worked if I wasn’t still sniffling.
“I could tickle you until you pee.”
“If you do, I’ll stab you with a pen,” I warned in a completely serious tone. I hated being tickled.
“I’ll take my chances.” He moved his hands to my ribs.
I opened my mouth to tell him not to even think about it, but it was too late. He started tickling me mercilessly. As he tickled under my arm, I scrambled to get away from him, but he was holding one hand around me to keep me from escaping.
“Please stop,” I gasped.
“Not a chance.” He tickled me everywhere he could reach.
I jerked hard, desperate to get away from him, but all I managed to do was fall over sideways on the couch, causing him to land on top of me. He continued to tickle me for a few seconds longer before finally taking mercy on my poor soul.
I fought for breath as I glared up at him. “That was cruel.”
He smirked. “At least you stopped crying.”
My glare disappeared as I realized just how close we were pressed together. I swallowed hard. “You can let me up now. I promise not to cry.” My voice sounded rough, even to my own ears.
He stared down at me, the smirk slipping off his face. “I think I’ll keep you where you are.”
I shoved at his chest as I tried to squirm out from underneath him, but it was pointless. His weight kept me from moving an inch.
“Let me up.”
He pressed his body tighter against mine. I wasn’t sure if he was doing it on purpose or if it was just a natural reaction. I sucked in a sharp breath as I felt the hard length of his dick against my leg. He seemed to notice just how close we were. Instead of moving away like I’d expected, he stayed right where he was.
“Move,” I said, my voice nothing more than a whisper.
He shook his head. “I can’t. Goddamn it. I want to, but I can’t.”
He lowered his head and brushed his lips against mine. It was the sweetest kiss I’d ever tasted. Without hesitating, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. It felt like the most natural thing in the world. A growl came from deep within his throat when I ran my hands through the silky locks of his hair.
The kiss grew feverish. He kissed me fast and hard, like he was afraid he’d never have another chance. I parted my lips to welcome him to explore deeper, and he didn’t disappoint. His tongue thrust into my mouth, causing heat to flare from deep within my body. I felt like I was on fire everywhere our bodies were pressed together.
He ran his hand down my ribs, past my hip, and stopped when he reached the bottom of my shorts. His hand was hot against my bare skin. A moan escaped from my lips. My body begged me to let him touch me everywhere.
“Please,” I whispered against his lips, unsure of what I was begging for.
He groaned. “Your body is pure temptation to me, Rebecca.”
I whimpered as his hand moved to the inside of my leg. His fingers crept up and under my shorts. My body jerked when his hand slipped into my underwear. Then, he touched me in a way that I’d never been touched before. My head fell back against the couch as I felt his fingers gliding through my wet folds. Stopping over my throbbing clit, he circled it with his thumb, teasing me. I ground my hips against him, hoping to relieve the ache. He growled as he suddenly lost control. He cursed loudly as he pinched my clit between his fingers. I cried out as common sense left me and my body took over, my hips moving faster and faster. He thrust two fingers into me, and I shouted his name.
“You’re so fucking tight, Rebecca. Come for me, baby,” Alec said just before biting down on my neck.
Without warning, waves of ecstasy crashed over me. I would have been embarrassed at how loud I was screaming Alec’s name as I came, but I was past the point of caring. When my body finally came back down to earth, I opened my eyes.
Alec raised his head and stared down at me. “You make me lose control,” he whispered. “No matter how hard I try to stay away from you, I can’t. What is it about you that keeps drawing me back?”
“My charming personality?” I joked, my voice hoarse. I wasn’t sure how I was even able to speak.
Alec grinned as he slowly removed his hand from my shorts. I jumped when his hand brushed against my overly sensitive clit.
Dear God, the man made me come without taking off any of my clothes.
His eyes darkened when he noticed how I’d responded to him. “I need to go.”
My eyes widened in disbelief as he moved off of me and stood up. “Wait—what? You’re just going to leave after that?”
“I’ve got to go, or I’ll end up spending the night here.”
I opened my mouth to tell him that I didn’t care, but he shook his head before I could say anything.
“You might say yes right now, but you’d regret it later. We’ve already gone too far. I just can’t. I’m sorry.” He walked to my door. “Good-bye, Rebecca.”
I stayed where I was long after he’d closed my apartment door behind him.
What just happened?
Chapter Five
I YAWNE
D AS I CLIMBED the stairs to my apartment door. I was exhausted from working all week. Without thinking, I glanced at Alec’s door before heading to my own. It was a nasty little habit I’d picked up over the past month.
After Alec had left my apartment that night, he’d disappeared again. A week had gone by and then another. When I couldn’t take it anymore, I’d finally gathered enough courage to walk across the hall and knock on his door, but nothing happened. I’d tried again a few days later. He never answered.
I’d assumed that he was home and just avoiding me. I understood why, but I would have been lying if I said it didn’t hurt. The morning after our encounter on my couch, I’d woken up and realized how mortified I was. I’d let Alec touch me. I’d never, not even once, let another man touch me the way he had. With him, I hadn’t even thought about telling him no. At the time, it had felt right.
After a month of complete silence, I’d decided that I was an idiot for giving in to him. He obviously didn’t want anything to do with me. The man had admitted that he was a man-whore, yet he didn’t want me. Obviously, he’d had a moment of weakness that night, and it seemed to only strengthen his resolve to stay away from me.
I glanced back at his door one more time before finally unlocking mine and slipping into my apartment. I needed to forget about Alec. He’d certainly forgotten about me.
***
TWO DAYS LATER ON Saturday morning, I finally saw Alec again. I almost wished I hadn’t. When I opened my apartment door to leave to meet Arie for breakfast, I saw Alec’s door opening as well. My stomach dropped to my knees when I saw a woman stepping out of his apartment. She had obviously spent the night with him if her smeared makeup and wrinkled clothes were any indication. She turned back and kissed him before walking away. She didn’t even seem to notice me standing only a few feet away.
A surge of anger went through me even though I had no right to feel that way. Alec wasn’t mine, not even close, and I had no claim on him. He could bring as many women as he wanted back to his apartment.
