by Anna Paige
Time to prove her wrong.
I motioned for her to stay back and watched with an amused smile as she used her hands to paddle her floating body further from the pier. Not her arms, just her hands in a small flapping motion that was bird-like but surprisingly effective. So damn adorable.
When I was sure she was out of harm's way, I told her, "Can't have you feeling lonely now, can I? Get ready, love. I'm coming in." In more ways than one.
I took a deep breath and dove in headfirst, slicing through the cool water with ease, my usual feeling of freedom was expanded a hundredfold. I kicked and stroked and dove until my lungs were about to burst only surfacing when I absolutely had to. I sucked in a breath and dove again, unable to stop. It was only after I reached the far bank that I stayed on the surface treading water and panting in lungful after lungful of the night air that smelled of honeysuckle.
Ali was treading water too, one hand on the pier as she watched me with a look of pride. I gave her a little wave and started making my way back, alternating between slow crawl strokes and back strokes that afforded me a stunning view of the night sky. As I neared the spot where I'd last spotted her, she floated peacefully on the water staring up at the stars and my desire rekindled, burning white hot even in the cool water.
She watched as I made my way over, positioning myself between her legs and telling her to stay just as she was, floating there on her back like a goddess in the moonlight. I wanted to see if coming would make her sink. The water was shallower here, and I was able to touch the bottom, though barely.
I pushed her legs wider apart, smiling when she remained buoyant. I ran my tongue up her inner thigh and chuckled when her gasp made her torso momentarily drop deeper into the water. She resurfaced, and I reached up to palm one of her breasts, careful not to put the weight of my arm on her. She whimpered but stayed atop the water, so I went in for the kill. I locked my mouth over her mound and held her ass up in the water so I could apply just enough pressure to her swollen clit to set her off.
Soft mewling noises echoed across the lake as I swirled my tongue over her, in her. She was the sweetest thing I'd tasted in my life. Her body tensed as she struggled against the urge to grind into my mouth. The desperate sounds she made in the back of her throat told me she was close, she just needed a little push, and she would come apart. I kept working her with my mouth while I walked us closer to the shore, seeking the shallower water to get the leverage I needed with my legs.
Once I was able to plant both feet firmly on the lake bed, I wrapped both arms around her thighs and pulled her into my face, burying my tongue inside her. Pulling back, I swirled it over her clit while I slipped two fingers into her and pumped them in and out, fucking her hard with my hand.
Ali's hands shot up to squeeze and tug her breasts, and soon she was convulsing, quaking in my mouth. She stayed afloat, but I kept one hand below her back, just in case, while I lapped at her clit and thrust my fingers with incrementally slowing strokes. I kept softly licking, kissing, and sucking at her until her contented sigh announced that she'd recovered.
As soon as I removed my hands her lower half sank into the lake, and she began treading water in front of me. Despite the orgasm that had just ripped through her, there was desire in her eyes. She reached out to me — she was still unable to touch bottom — and I took her in my arms. She locked her legs around my middle and kissed me deeply, running her hands through my dripping hair.
I took hold of her, my thumbs at her hip bones and my fingers grasping her ass as I lifted her up and onto my cock. I lowered her slowly, enjoying the feel of her hot flesh enveloping me an inch at a time. When I slipped all the way in, I thought my legs would give out. She felt so fucking good.
She wrapped her arms around my shoulders and pulled her hips back, my dick slipping almost all the way out before she thrust forward and took me to the hilt. She circled her hips, dipped and swayed on my cock until I had to bite my lip to keep from swearing. I'd never felt anything like this, ever. She was so hot, so tight, so...
Oh, fuck!
I grasped her hips and pulled her all the way onto me, halting her motions. "Wait, baby, we can't do this."
She clenched her muscles, gripping me tight enough to make me growl. "Oh, really? It feels like we can." She nipped at my lip and gripped me again.
One more of those and I was going to go off like a goddamn rocket.
"No. That's not what I mean." I thrust my hips forward almost involuntarily before I stopped myself with a groan. "I wasn't thinking straight, hell, I'm still not but we have to stop. I'm not wearing a condom."
She watched me for a moment, finally stilling. "I guess we were a little distracted." She kissed me softly and pushed my hair back off my forehead. "Do you have one at all? In the truck maybe?"
I shook my head. "No. I never keep them in my vehicles or wallet, too much chance of them being ruined by the heat."
She nodded thoughtfully. "Smart. Inconvenient in our current situation but still smart." She looked at me seriously. "Have you ever...? I mean, without a condom?"
"No. Not once. But before you go thinking I'm some kind of Boy Scout, it wasn't about me being responsible. It was me having convinced myself that no kid deserved a father like me because I was a walking, talking curse."
She gave me a sad smile and pulled my mouth to hers for a brief kiss. "That's not true, you know that right?" I nodded, and she looked relieved that I no longer felt that way about myself. "I don't know how you feel about continuing without a condom, but I want you to know that I'm clean. I was tested for everything known to man after Keith and there's been no one else except you." And there never will be, my mind supplied. "I'm also on birth control." She pulled my forehead to hers, looking me in the eye. "We can stop right now and go to the cabin. I'm fine with that, truly I am. But, I want you to know that I trust you, I trust us enough not to stop if that's what you want."
Hell no, I didn't want to stop. Nothing in my life had ever felt so good, so right. I'd never had sex without that barrier, but with her I didn't want anything between us. Figuratively, or literally. It was the only 'first' I had left, and I wanted it with her. I wanted to feel her, to fill her, to mark her.
I thrust up sharply and nipped at her lip. "I want this. I want to make love to you, feel your body around me, to come inside you over and over. You're mine, Ali. And I'm yours." I pulled out of her, the cool water a sharp contrast to her heated core before slamming back in, going balls-deep.
She gasped at the invasion and said, "I'm yours, Clay. Don't stop. Please."
I set off with a growl, making my way closer to the bank, struggling for balance with Ali still wrapped around me, inside and out. She squealed and clutched my shoulders, "What are you doing, crazy?"
"I'm taking you back to our spot under the willow where I can do this properly."
MIDNIGHT FOUND US lying beneath the willow in a tangle of trembling limbs, each of us sated and content in each other's arms. We lay on our sides, facing each other, quietly talking between soft caresses. Ali asked if Spencer and I were still on good terms, admitting she'd heard that he'd tracked me down like a dog.
I snorted at the memory. "Yeah, we're good. Probably better than we've been in a long time. Lots of shit had been building up. Now we have a clean slate, provided I don't mess it up again."
"Talia read me the riot act, too. I've never had her that mad at me before." She shook her head, eyes wide. "She's scary as hell when you tick her off." I laughed, smoothing her hair, and asked what Ali could have possibly done wrong. I was the one who lied. "Talia said I was running, again. And that I was acting like a coward, which pissed me off." Sounded familiar. Ali's voice dropped to a near-whisper. "She told me that not everyone was going to turn out to be like Keith. She said your lies were different because there was no ill intent behind them, and I would be letting Keith win if what he did to me stopped me from loving you."
I hugged her closer, pulled her into the crook of my nec
k and kissed her head. "You had every reason to be angry, to want out. That was because of me, of what I did, not because of Keith." I owed Talia a thank you for giving Ali a push but ultimately, Ali had been right to leave.
She blew out a breath and nodded. "I know I had a good excuse, but she's still right. I was running from my anger, from my doubts, from my insecurities. You're not the only one whose past tends to jump up and bite them in the ass." She rubbed her hand up and down my side, the tender gesture giving me goosebumps. "Most of the time, I find constructive ways to manage my emotional baggage. I paint, I read, I bury myself in my work. It's easy to let it all go on every other level but when it comes to relationships, I'm still floundering."
"I'm the same way. I've built my life around my crutches. I break things to get rid of my anger and build things from the wreckage to regain control." I leaned back and begged, "But please, for fuck's sake, don't tell Spencer I said that. If he knows some of his psycho-babble bullshit got through, he'll never shut up."
Ali laughed happily and made a crossing motion over her heart. The wind picked up, the cool breeze stirring her hair, making wayward tendrils wrap around her face as she tried to push them away. She rolled to her back, running her hand over the strands and tucking them behind her ear. Suddenly, her hand dropped to her side, and she laughed uproariously.
I sat up on my elbow, looking at her in confusion. "What's so funny?"
She tried to speak but couldn't curb her laughter long enough to get out anything coherent. With shaking shoulders and tears running from the corners of her eyes, she raised a hand and pointed up. I tilted my head back, squinting into the moonlight to see what the hell she was howling about. A moment later, I caught sight of it myself and barked out a laugh that rang out across the valley. We lay there hugging our middles and laughed until we cried, gasping and sputtering but unable to speak as we kept looking up at it. It looked like I'd been in a bigger hurry than I thought to join Ali in the water.
There, tangled about ten feet up in the sweeping branches of the willow, was my underwear.
SOMEHOW OUR LAUGHTER turned into kissing that turned into another round of lovemaking, during which the wind somehow disentangled my boxer briefs from the tree. Afterward, we lay close together and continued our conversation with sleepy voices. Ali watched me intently, her fingers swirling in my smattering of chest hair and asked, "Do you think your decision to design houses for a living was something that came from Rebecca not getting her dream home?"
I quirked a brow at her. "You been talking to Spencer?" She laughed and shook her head. She didn't need him to tell her I had issues. She was far too intelligent for that. I blew out a breath. "Yeah, I suppose that was part of it in the beginning. I'd always thought it was Spencer who first talked about going into home design but now that I think about it, I guess it was me. Maybe somewhere in my twisted up mind I thought it would make me feel better. The same way learning to swim and getting good enough at it to compete was supposed to make me feel better."
"I understand perfectly." She sighed, her hand coming to rest over my heart. "I'm not sure I ever really wanted to go into marketing. I just wanted to be independent, no matter what I ended up doing. Keith was the one who convinced me to apply at GFS with him." She snorted derisively. "I was touched that he had that kind of faith in me, but now I think he just wanted us to work together so he could keep me under his thumb."
"I'm sure he never thought I'd be more successful than him. He couldn't stand that I could do things on my own, took it as an insult to his manhood. Jackass. It had nothing to do with him. I made up my mind a long time ago that I wasn't going to be my mother. She valued money over her family, left a man who would have given his life for her to find someone with deep pockets and shallow feelings." She shook her head sadly. "That's not what I want for my life, no matter how much she tries to tell me I'd be better off."
Playing devil's advocate, I said, "If she knew the truth about Keith, maybe she'd see it differently."
She blinked rapidly, eyes shining. "After I sent Keith back to that hospital with injuries of his own, I was hurting worse than ever. Broken ribs are a real bitch. I didn't want to drag Talia into that mess, so I went to my mother's house. I don't know why I did it. I guess somewhere deep down I still want her to be a mom to me, even though she's not capable." She brushed a tear from her cheek and grimaced. "I had a week off work for Keith's and my celebratory vacation, the one that was never going to happen, so I ran to my mother's place to lick my wounds. When I told her what happened, do you know what she said?"
My chest ached at the pain in her eyes as I shook my head.
"She said 'Keith is going places. He'll be a good provider one day if you can just get past his little eccentricities. Being with a powerful man always comes with a price.'" Her voice wavered and cracked. I pulled her tight against me, unable to fathom the callousness of the remarks. Ali trembled in my arms, but her voice sounded stronger as she continued. "You were a stranger to me then but what you did that night was the only caring gesture I received. No one else knew what happened, not even Talia. So, even though I acted like I resented your help, I'm grateful for what you did."
I kissed the top of her head and gave her a squeeze. "I'm just sorry I didn't do more. You deserved to be comforted, held, supported, and you didn't get any of that. What did you say to your mother after she imparted those timeless words of wisdom?" My voice dripped with sarcasm, and I swore to myself that I'd get the opportunity to tell Ali's mom exactly what I thought of her. One day, one day.
"I told her if she thought so damn much of Keith, she should marry him herself. Let him beat the shit out of her just so she could live in luxury. Holden had no idea what was going on when he walked in. I told him I was in a car accident, the same story everyone else got. When he saw my mother in a tizzy and the tension between us, he stepped in and offered her a week at the spa, which she took without even looking back. He went away on business, leaving me there for the week alone. He knew she wouldn't want me with her at the spa and he knew better than to offer me a trip or a stay in a fancy hotel, so he took off."
"Why didn't you go to your father? You've always been close to him, right?" I hadn't met Jeffrey Walker, but I'd spoken briefly with him on the phone when he called the cabin for Ali. He was polite but cautious, not knowing the extent of my relationship with his daughter but just watching her face light up when she talked to him told me everything I needed to know about the man.
She shook her head vigorously. "No way. If he knew..." She raised her brows in a fearful expression. "Remember me telling you he 'hunts' with a camera? Well, just because he couldn't bring himself to shoot a deer..." She trailed off, and I knew exactly what Jeffrey would have done. The same thing I wanted to do every time I thought of her with those marks on her body.
I needed to chase away that image, so I steered the conversation away from that night. "So, if you aren't sure marketing is what you want to do, why are you fighting so hard to keep the job at GFS?"
She cocked a brow, smirking. "Because they don't have the balls to fire me. They're drawing out their 'investigation' in hopes that I'll get pissed off and quit. They don't want to get on Holden's shit list, so they are looking for a way to unload me without repercussions from step-daddy dearest." She tilted her head, the corner of her mouth turning up in a sly smile. "So, when the paid leave ended, I started draining my vacation time. Now that it's gone, I have no reason to keep the job. I know they're not going to take me back, no matter what. Even though I'm innocent, there would be rumors, chatter that would cost them clients. The only reason I haven't told them to go to hell is I like knowing they're squirming in their Italian leather shoes and expensive ergonomic office chairs."
I shook my head softly, chuckling. "And here I thought you were a victim in all this, that you had your heart set on going back there because it was your passion."
"Sorry to disappoint, Mr. McGavran. I'm no one's victim. The only thing my heart is s
et on is you, which works out great because you've become one of my passions as well." She straightened enough to reach my lips, stirring my arousal with a single lingering kiss. Just as she was pulling back to speak again, her stomach growled loud and long, making her blush in that innocent way that I loved.
"Sounds like we need to find ourselves some dinner." I smiled into her deep green eyes and pulled her body on top of mine. "Right after we finish here."
We made it back to the cabin a couple of hours before dawn and decided breakfast was more appropriate given the time. We ate our food slowly, enjoying each other's company and listening to the soft music coming from the radio. A new song started playing, its cadence soft and passionate, and Ali's fond smile made me suddenly feel like dancing.
I pushed back my chair and stood, holding out my hand. "May I have this dance?"
She dabbed the corners of her mouth with her napkin and tossed it onto her nearly empty plate. "Absolutely. I feel like I haven't been in your arms in ages."
There was no mocking in her tone, no irony. She genuinely missed my touch. And the feeling was most assuredly mutual. I held her close against me as we swayed to the music and, when the next song started, we kept our own tempo so we could hold on a little longer.
We danced so long that the first inklings of the approaching dawn crested the mountaintops in the distance, the blackness of the night being chased away by the first colorful slashes of sunlight. I'd remembered that Ali squealed every time she was dipped, so I did it as often as possible. I'd realized a great deal since I last saw the dawn.
That the people I'd been pushing away all my life were the ones I wanted to hold onto most.
That refusing to decide was a decision in itself.
That no matter how high you build your walls, love will always find a way in.
The sun shone brightly in the sky by the time we made our way to my room. Our room. Ali stepped over to the dresser to steal one of my tee shirts while I got ready for bed. She brushed by me as I was leaving the bathroom, her toothbrush in hand and a sleepy smile on her face. I swatted her behind and went to turn down the covers, leaving her to her bedtime ritual.
