by Laura Taylor
But now that the decision was made, there was nothing to be gained from delaying her move.
She stood up, feeling her heart racing, and announced, “I petition for the role of alpha.”
It took a few moments for everyone to pay attention, looks of confusion, disbelief and even anger shot her way. “What?” someone asked, so she repeated herself.
“I petition for the role of alpha.” She turned to Heron, the one female who ranked above her, and stated simply, “I challenge you to a status fight.”
It broke the rules of status challenges, as she would be skipping several males in rank for the fight, but with things the way they were, no one seemed to care about the paltry details at this stage.
Heron stood up, normally a calm, genteel sort of woman, but in this instance, she was livid, face red, having just broken off a long verbal tirade at Anna about her abandonment of duty, so this latest challenge just seemed to infuriate her more.
“You have neither the experience nor the social pull to hold the rank of alpha,” Heron declared flatly, the rudest thing she had ever said to Caroline, and there were several gasps across the room as the Den looked on.
“Baron?” Caroline asked, ignoring the insult. “Do we have leave to fight?” Perhaps technically she should have asked Anna, as the ranking female, but after years of neglect and her impending departure, it wasn’t likely anyone would take her seriously anyway.
“You have leave,” Baron said calmly, standing up to lead the way out onto the back lawn.
Caroline followed, Heron glaring at her all the way, and as they faced off across the damp grass, the Den forming a wide circle around them, Heron drew herself up with dignity and announced, “I will not be throwing this fight.” It put voice to the thoughts a lot of the Den must be having. It wasn’t unknown for a higher ranking wolf to deliberately lose a fight to allow another to climb the ranks. There were a number of reasons why someone might do so, but in the end all of them came down to the same point – rank in the Den was not just based on physical strength and skill. There were also complex social structures in place, which meant that a wolf with significant social support, perhaps because of clear leadership qualities, or niche skills, like hacking, for example, could climb the ranks even if his or her fighting skills were not up to scratch. But in this case, that was clearly not going to cut it. “I will not see this Den weakened and be put at risk by an inferior alpha just because we have a seat to fill.”
“Understood,” Caroline said simply. In truth, she preferred it that way. At least if the fight was real, then she’d know one way or another whether she was worthy of leading the Den. And if not? Well, then, she’d done her best to hold them all together, and whatever fallout happened after that was not her fault.
She and Heron both shifted, the older wolf strong and experienced, giving her the edge despite her age, and they locked eyes, each trying to stare the other down.
“Begin,” Baron said from the sidelines, and then it was on, no hesitation, no spare moments to plan or strategise. Just two lithe, furry bodies flinging themselves at each other, snarls and growls filling the air as they tumbled over each other, neither one pulling any punches.
It took upwards of twenty minutes for the fight to end. And when the conclusion came, it was with Heron lying on her side on the blood-splattered grass, her sides heaving as she gasped for breath, Caroline standing over her, teeth bared, tail high, the clear winner.
“Caroline now outranks Heron,” Baron announced, amid a host of jeers and shouts of victory from all around them. “But don’t go thinking that means you’re alpha,” he warned her firmly. “You have two more males standing between you and the top spot. So take a day or two to recover, if you need it. But then it’s back to business.”
Panting harshly and dripping blood all over the grass, Caroline nodded. This was the first, but most certainly not the last fight she would need to win to claim her place as alpha.
Three days later, Caroline was once more striding across the lawn, the Den gathering around her. Silas was her opponent this time. Two days ago she’d fought Caleb, and won, which had come as a surprise more to herself than to anyone else. Now Silas was the last wolf standing between her and the rank of alpha, and the quiet words he’d spoken to her this morning echoed in her mind.
He’d pulled her aside, out of the kitchen at breakfast, and murmured, “You know you have to challenge me soon. And understand me clearly, Caroline…” He’d glanced around, to check they were alone, and then muttered, “You cannot beat me in a fair fight. You and I both know that.” It was true – Silas had taught Caroline almost everything she knew about fighting, and while the student could sometimes grow to outshine the teacher, that was certainly not the case in this instance. “And if you want to hold rank for any length of time,” he went on, “then this fight needs to look good.” He looked her in the eye. “So I need you to hit hard, move fast, and leave the rest up to me. If the Den doesn’t believe this is real, they’ll never pull in behind you.”
Caroline was too much of a pragmatist to be offended by his declaration that he could win the fight, and she was not nearly clever enough to know how to stage one effectively. So she had to trust Silas to hold to his word. He’d been the one to get her into this situation, after all. Not much sense in setting her up as alpha if he was just going to kick it out from under her now.
The fight was hard and vigorous – by Caroline’s standards, it was as real as they came, Silas a tough opponent, a very even match that she was genuinely struggling to beat at times. Which was probably just as well, she thought in hindsight, when she’d finally pinned him to the ground, both of them bleeding, and secured his surrender by choking the air out of him whilst simultaneously sitting on him with her full weight and digging her claws into his belly. If the fight was good enough to almost convince her that it was real, then the rest of the Den should be no problem.
As Silas climbed to his feet and offered his hand for her to shake, Caroline looked around at the silent crowd, feeling more nervous than ever about the situation.
The last few days had been fraught with tension, as firstly, Anna had left, not even sparing them the courtesy of waiting until a new alpha was found, and then there had been endless discussions on the possibility of Caroline taking over the role. Baron had been an absolute rock, standing firmly beside Caroline the whole way – a surprise to her, given that their relationship had often been on shaky ground. Some of the Den had legitimate concerns, a number of which Baron had answered by stating that there was a mandatory period of extra training from the Council for any new alpha, to get them up to speed with all their various duties and responsibilities.
“In the absence of further challenges, I claim the rank of alpha,” Caroline announced. “How does the Den answer?”
A full public veto would see her booted from the role, regardless of her rank. She waited, holding her breath as the Den considered their answer.
“You run fast and true,” Silas said finally, the first to answer the question. “And I will follow.”
“I will follow,” Caleb said next, and then Heron, Raniesha, Skip, until every voice was repeating the sentiment.
But if Caroline should have felt any kind of pride or satisfaction at her latest achievement, it was strangely absent. Instead, all she felt was the heavy weight of responsibility. These wolves had chosen to support her, despite many of them having very real doubts about her ability to fill the role, and gaining the title of alpha was just the first step in proving to them all that she had what it took to lead.
She was not going to let them down. She had much to learn, many adjustments to make to her life, and after the mess that Anna had left for her, there was no way in the world she was going to take a backseat position where Baron was concerned. If he thought he could get away with continuing to run the Den singlehandedly, with no one to check his more outlandish ideas, he had another thing coming. He was her closest and most loyal ally, Carol
ine knew already, but he was also going to be her toughest opposition.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Present Day
Caroline sat on the back patio, alone for the time being, a glass of vodka in her hand as she tried to calm her jittery nerves.
She’d spent the entire day thinking, pacing her room, then running in wolf form to try and clear her head. She’d read the booklet Eleanor had given her, and sat with the woman for a couple of hours, asking her questions – not because she particularly wanted answers, but because she knew it was expected of her. And after all of it, she was no closer to a decision than she had been when Eleanor had first delivered her unexpected news.
The back door opened, and Caroline glanced around to see Baron stepping outside. She swore under her breath. He was the last person she wanted to see right now, desperately needing time alone to think, and she hopped off the wall she was sitting on, turning to face him with a glare. “What the fuck do you want?”
“Nice to see you, too,” he replied blithely, taking a seat on the wall she had just vacated. “I thought we could have a little chat.”
“Eleanor said I could take a few days to make a decision,” Caroline snapped, sure that he’d come to tell her she was perfect for the job and what the hell was she waiting for? “So I’m taking some time, thinking about it, and I don’t appreciate-”
“Whoa, hang on,” Baron jumped in, holding up his hands. “Let’s call a truce here, shall we? There have been moments in the past – not many, but enough – when you and I have managed to put down our swords and have a heartfelt discussion without the need to lock horns. And I’d like to have a go at that now.”
That made Caroline pause. In truth, for all their frequent disagreements, she respected Baron more than she’d respected almost anyone else in her life. So she stepped back. Took a deep breath. Came to sit down on the wall again and waited for him to speak.
Baron looked her over slowly, an expression of genuine affection creeping over his face. “Kendrick would have been proud of you,” he said softly. “He never stopped believing in you. You’ve gone from rebellious teenager, to lethal warrior, to alpha of the entire Den. And now you’re up for Councillor. He would have been proud.”
Caroline said nothing, but felt her face heat at the praise. It wasn’t often that Baron bothered to affirm or compliment anything she had done.
“I firmly believe that you would make a magnificent Councillor,” he said next. “You have an eye for strategy that few can match. You’re selfless, to an almost ridiculous degree.” When she went to protest, he went on. “When Anna stepped down as alpha, our Den was facing the worst crisis it had seen since Kendrick died.”
That was true enough. Kendrick’s death had come out of nowhere, a raid by the Noturatii that had seen half their Den wiped out in a single day, a gaping hole left in their ranks with Anna badly injured and left in a coma, and no males of sufficient rank or training to take Kendrick’s place as alpha. Left without a rudder in a wild and dangerous storm, the Council had stepped in, all but ready to shut down the Den and move its remaining members overseas. That Baron had pulled them back from the brink was nothing short of a miracle. And it was perhaps an overstatement to say that Caroline had done the same, when Anna stepped down, but not by a huge degree.
“You stepped up to the post,” Baron went on. “You completed the Council’s training, you got Silas to teach you to fight. Like an alpha, not like a force of nature bent on destruction,” he added with a laugh, at her insulted look. “And you pulled the Den in behind you, when half of them were just as ready to stab you in the back and call it quits.
“And now you’re staring down the barrel of a position on the Council. I know exactly what’s going to happen in the next few days. The Den is going to vote on your appointment.” The vote was the last formality in the election process, and a clear majority was needed to make the appointment official. Caroline still had her doubts about whether they’d side with her, but apparently, Baron held no such reservations. “And they’re going to approve it,” he said confidently. “Then you’re going to accept the posting in Italy, pack up your things here, and move in with a bunch of stiffs whose favourite thing in the world is to talk policy all day long.” He smiled, and then the look faded, turning pensive instead. “But if you head into that battlefield in the mindset you’re currently in, you are going to hate every single minute of it.” Caroline turned to him with a glare, but Baron wasn’t done yet. “Not only will you hate the job, but you’ll hate yourself for hating it, and you’ll hate everyone else for putting you there – the Den, Andre, the Council itself. Because,” he said, emphasising his words carefully, “you have been living in a cage of your own making since the moment you set foot inside this Den.”
The words cut too close to the bone, the truth suddenly a living, breathing thing, a ghost given life by his words. “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about,” she bit out harshly.
“Look at yourself, Caroline. Look at the work you do. You never cut yourself any slack. You don’t let yourself fail. You won’t admit when you’re tired. You won’t lean on anyone else. You won’t ask for help when you don’t know the answers. You’ve set this impossible standard for yourself, and you see anything less as total and complete failure.
“You think I never screw things up?” Baron went on, continuing right along with his rant. “No, scratch that, of course I do. But I’m aware of it. The rest of the Den is aware of it. Hell, the fucking Council is aware of it. But the Council doesn’t beat me up over it because they all know, from personal experience, how fucking difficult it is to run a Den. The rest of the Den knows, but they don’t throw it in my face, because they’re all terrified that if I’m not here, one of them will have to do this job instead. So understand, Caroline, that no one expects you to be perfect. No one except you.”
He was right, Caroline had to admit to herself, even if she couldn’t quite get the words out. That was what she felt each and every day, every time they were attacked by the Noturatii, every time they had to make a decision on a new recruit or on a battle strategy. It was the bars of her self-inflicted cage, tightening around her, a constant warning that if she didn’t get it right this time, didn’t fight hard enough, didn’t make the best choice, then the cage would close around her and crush her once and for all.
If she was entirely honest with herself, that was what she had felt when Eleanor had offered her the position on the Council. Just another cage, a stronger one this time, with thicker walls, with the ceiling bearing down on her if she made the slightest mistake.
She was no stranger to the challenges that the Council faced on a daily basis. They wrote the rules that kept their society a secret. Chose the location for each Den. Determined how many members each one could have, passed judgement on new recruits, decided strategies for fighting the Noturatii and safeguarded the future of their species. It was terrifying to think that Caroline would soon be among their number, making decisions that could make or break their future. How the hell was she going to deal with that, when it wasn’t individual lives on the line, but the future of their entire species?
But walking away from the challenge also wasn’t an option, because that, in itself, was a failure. A failure to stand up to her responsibilities, to use her skills and knowledge to steer this eclectic family towards a brighter future. And failure was never, ever an option.
“Being appointed to the Council can be the greatest honour any shifter can receive,” Baron told her softly. “It’s a chance to change the course of history, to balance tradition with progress, to bring to light new ideas that can be mined for tremendous rewards.
“So go to Italy if it’s what you truly want. No one would stop you, and just so you’re aware, I admire the hell out of you for even considering it. Being offered a position like that would scare the shit out of me. But if it’s just another cage, just another set of duties and expectations heaped upon you by other people… I’m
just saying maybe you should think twice.”
He stood up, not expecting a reply, and for the moment at least, Caroline had none to offer. He’d ripped her most private fears wide open and exposed them to the light of day. And she was mortified to feel tears pricking at her eyes as she suddenly remembered the only other man who had ever managed to do that to her, and remembered also that he was forever lost to her, having himself chosen obligation and duty over personal satisfaction, the decision keeping him from her as surely as if he were locked in a cage of his own.
“The door is open, Caroline. No one is keeping you in your cage except yourself. So isn’t it about time you stepped outside and had a look at what else life can offer you?”
With that final question, Baron turned and walked away, leaving Caroline with more questions, and more doubts than ever before.
The following evening, Caroline was once again standing on the back patio of the manor, but this time she was far from alone. The entire Den had gathered, along with Eleanor, who was overseeing the ceremony, and Andre, who was lurking in a corner, keeping to himself. It hadn’t just been Caroline avoiding him, she realised as she stole covert glances at him through the crowd. He’d been going out of his way to avoid her, as well.
“As you are all aware,” Eleanor was saying, “Caroline has been proposed as a candidate for the empty seat on the Council. We have made this decision after careful deliberation and a thorough investigation into her skills and attributes, and we have the utmost confidence in her ability to guide Il Trosa with kindness and wisdom.
“But our opinions are not the only ones that matter. You, also, all have a voice. And so, having given you all twenty-four hours to consider this matter, I am calling the vote. Your decision will be upheld as the final voice on the subject. An affirmative vote will see your alpha rise to the position of Councillor, to oversee the future of our species. A negative vote will nullify her candidacy and close the matter permanently. So I ask you all: Consider this choice seriously. Place your vote honestly. And consider not just your own feelings, but the future of Il Trosa in this decision.”
