by Blythe Baker
I wasn’t sure what compelled me to do it, but I ran toward him, ready to embrace him. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I needed someone, and Lucan was –
Lucan stretched out his hand, preventing me from getting too close to him.
It was like hitting a wall.
I staggered to a halt, my eyes filling with tears as I glared at him. So this was how it was going to be? He was just going to outright reject me?
“Who did this?” Lucan asked me, his face no longer filled with sorrow, but pure anger.
Some of that anger washed over me, and I flinched away from it. “I – I don’t know,” I said, taking a step back.
“You didn’t see anything? Anyone?” he asked, his voice rising. “Nothing to give you any hint about what could have done it?”
I’d never seen him like this. Composed, collected Lucan was falling to pieces right in front of me.
I swallowed hard, prickles crawling up and down my arms, helplessness pressing against my heart. “I saw this shadowed man. His name is Dante Fain. He – he showed up at this meeting the Ungifted were having about the paranormals, and – ”
Lucan’s eyes were as hard as granite as he stared down at me. “Tell me what he did.”
I told him everything that happened in the forest; stumbling on the wolf, Athena feeling a presence, and then Dante crossing my path.
“He’s terrifying…” I said, wrapping my arms around myself. Cold seeped into my bones, and even though Lucan was standing right there in front of me, I felt so distant and alone.
Lucan seemed to be lost in his own thoughts, reflecting on the story I’d told him.
“There’s just something about him, and I’m afraid that he knows what I am,” I said. “I mean, how did he just happen to cross my path? I think – I’m worried that he’s following me. Lucan, I haven’t been afraid of anyone like this since I learned the truth about myself, and – ”
“Did you say he’s been wandering through the forest?” Lucan asked.
I blinked at him. “Did you not hear anything I just said?” I asked, the anger he was so clearly fighting welling up inside of me, as well.
Lucan’s face darkened further. “I just lost one of my pack, and you want me to listen to you talk about your feelings?” he asked. “What about what happened to me? Jacob was one of the wolves I’ve known longest. He was a dear friend, and – ”
“Why do you think I raced over here?” I asked, my own voice growing in volume. “As soon as I found him, I left to come tell you! All I cared about was letting you know – ”
“Well, thank you very much for doing that,” Lucan said, and he turned back toward the front door, which was still standing wide open. “But if you’ll excuse me, I need to formulate a search party to go and retrieve him. Exactly where did you say he was?”
His back was turned to me, and something inside me snapped.
“Everyone…” I murmured. “Keeps turning their back on me.”
Lucan glanced briefly over his shoulder. “What did you say?”
My gaze sharpened as I stared at the side of his face. “Everyone keeps turning their backs on me. Ignoring me. Putting distance between us. Everyone is doing this. Including you!”
Lucan did turn around at that, his golden eyes indecipherable. He stared at me intently, his brow furrowing. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“Yes you do,” I snapped. “Ever since you found out I was a faery, you’ve treated me different. Not at first. No, when my secret got out, I thought you would be the only one who’d stand with me, who would understand…” I said. “But even you distanced yourself from me. And…” the sorrow pushed its way to the top, breaking the surface of my anger like a fierce geyser. “You broke your promise, Lucan.”
Lucan’s face was a blank mask. “What do you mean, I broke my promise?” he asked.
“You told me that you’d always strive to be honest with me. And these last few days, ever since I came to you about Harriet Bennet…you’ve been distant, hiding yourself. I don’t know if you’re ashamed of me, or if you’re afraid, but I just can’t stand it anymore!”
Lucan couldn’t hold my gaze for longer than a few seconds. He licked his lips, his jaw clenching as he stared down at his polished shoes.
“You have been the one person who I really felt like I could trust all along,” I said. “I was so afraid of letting anyone in too close, because I’ve lost too many people that I cared about, and I’ve gotten used to them turning on me. But I thought you were different. You stood there with me, promised to protect me, and then when I need you, I come running and find out that you were just lying through your teeth the whole time – ”
“I wasn’t lying,” Lucan said, and there was a hitch in his words. The color had drained from his face, and he took a step toward me. “Marianne, I never meant to hurt you – ”
I took a similar step backward, my hands held up in front of me defensively. “But you did. Because you made the choice to turn your back on me. I didn’t tell you to do it. So what was it? Are you jealous of my power?”
“No,” Lucan said, recoiling in disgust.
“Are you afraid of me?” I asked.
“No, of course not – ”
“Then why?” I asked. “Why did you string me along this whole time, making me think that you cared about me? And the one time, the one time, I decide to come to you for support and care, you’re just…not there?”
Lucan’s downcast face reminded me of a child being scolded for sneaking too many cookies before dinner. And for some reason, it made me even angrier.
“I thought you cared about me,” I said. “And I have put myself out there on the line for you, hoping that you’d be there to support me, and you just – you weren’t.”
“Marianne, I – ” Lucan said, taking another step toward me.
I shook my head.
“I don’t want your apology now,” I said, holding my hands up in surrender. I turned and ran down the stairs back toward my SUV. “Not when you don’t mean it.”
“Marianne, please, don’t go – ” Lucan said, chasing me down the stairs.
“No,” I said. “You shouldn’t have pushed me out. I can’t, Lucan – I can’t – ”
I climbed into the car, Athena squeezing it behind me, and I slammed the door.
Just as I did, Lucan reached the door.
He rested his hands on the window, staring in desperately at me.
For a brief moment, I looked up into his eyes, and I could have sworn I saw genuine care there.
But my heart hurt too much to listen to the rational thoughts inside my head.
I’d needed him. He wasn’t there until it was too late.
His lips parted, and he mouthed, Marianne…
I teared up, but turned the engine on.
No. He wasn’t there for me. If he was, he wouldn’t have rejected me like he had. He wouldn’t have needed me to tell him otherwise.
I put the car in reverse, and Lucan stumbled back from me as I stepped on the gas.
14
I spent the rest of the day cooped up in the antique shop. I was grateful we didn’t have too many customers. With the way I kept crying about everything, I didn’t think I’d be all that helpful…and really didn’t want anyone to see me.
By the time I got home that evening, I was absolutely exhausted.
“I feel like a high-schooler who’s just had her heart broken…” I said, pressing the warm compress in my hand to my throbbing forehead. “I’ve dealt with a lot worse pain than this from men.”
But your anger at Lucan is not just about him though…you know that, yes? Athena asked.
I opened my eyes long enough to glare at her as she sat beside me on the couch, her tiny, warm body pressed up against my hip. “Yes, I realize it was just the last straw.”
Your anguish is not just about your loss of trust in him. It’s about Cain, too, who you also care deeply about, Athena said. She hadn’t even opened her eyes, a
nd clearly hadn’t noticed my displeased expression.
I let out a heavy exhale. “I guess you’re right. I just wanted someone to stick with me through this.”
I’m here for you, Athena said calmly.
That hit me a little too hard. “You’re right…” I said, reaching out and stroking her back and shoulders. “I’m sorry. I hope you didn’t think I’d forgotten that.”
No, I didn’t, she said. But not everything is as bad as it seems right now.
“Maybe you’re right…” I said.
Lucan does care about you, Athena said. And so does Cain. But there is a lot of darkness spreading through Faerywood Falls right now, and it’s affecting everyone…not just you anymore.
“I think you’re right…” I said. “But is it really all because I came back to Faerywood Falls?”
If it is, it’s still not your fault, Athena said. Often times, when you are doing the right thing, there will be forces that will do everything they can to try and stop you. The harder you fight, the harder they’ll fight, too. I think that by the sheer amount of opposition you face, it’s clear you are heading in the right direction.
I pondered that for a moment. It did seem that the closer I got to the truth about myself, and about my family, the worse things around me became. “You might be onto something there…” I said. I smiled down at her. “My wise, ancient sage in the form of a fox.”
She opened one eye and peered up at me, the end of her puffy tail twitching.
I glanced over at the clock, and realized it was almost midnight.
“I should hit the hay…” I said. “Abe wants me to come into the antique shop early to help him sort through some donations.”
I tucked the warm compress back into the microwave and set it to heat back up while I went and pulled on my pajamas, brushed my teeth, and turned all the lights off for bed.
I pulled the compress back out and made my way to the bed, the quietness of the night pressing in on me in the darkness.
I snuggled down into the bed, the compress resting against my forehead. Athena hopped up beside me and tucked herself in against my knee.
I took a long, deep breath, and tried to relax.
My thoughts kept drifting toward Lucan, and then Cain, and then back again. But my eyelids were growing heavy, and the thoughts became fragmented, blending with early dreams that filled my mind just as I was drifting off to sleep…
And then there was a creak.
Sniffling, I rolled over onto my side. “Athena, what are you doing?” I mumbled. “It’s time for bed.”
That wasn’t me, she said, her voice clear and alert.
I opened one sleepy eye and saw her sitting erect, her body still and tense.
For a moment, we sat there, but there was no other sound.
“It’s just the cold…” I said, closing my eye. Sleep was threatening to take me, anyways, and I just wanted to give in.
And that’s when something closed around my throat.
My eyes flew open and I saw a silhouette standing over me, and felt hands wrapped around my neck, squeezing so tight that I couldn’t draw a breath.
I coughed and sputtered, the heated compress sliding off onto the floor.
I couldn’t make out the face of whoever it was. Bright spots of light popped in my vision, and I scrambled with my fingernails against the hands around my neck.
Athena snarled from behind the silhouette, and a moment later, there was a shout of pain, and the hands around my throat loosened.
The silhouette got up off me and hurried away, Athena growling low in her throat.
I turned and flicked the light on.
For a brief moment, I found myself staring at a woman in her early forties, with short, mousey brown hair that curled around her ears, icy blue eyes, and cheeks covered in freckles.
And then just as soon as I’d seen her, she was gone.
“What happened?” I asked, looking all around.
Athena growled again, and when I looked over at her, I saw blood dripping from her muzzle.
“Did you attack her?” I asked.
Yes, Athena said. She was trying to kill you.
“Well, thanks for that,” I said breathlessly. “Now, where’d she go?”
I stared around nervously, certain that whoever she was, she probably didn’t go far. I wished I had something more than a hot compress to protect me, but I stooped and picked it up anyway.
Didn’t Mrs. Bickford mention creatures like this? Athena asked.
It was like a light bulb flickered on inside my mind. “You’re right…” I said. I raised my voice. “You’re a ghost walker…aren’t you?”
Suddenly, the woman reappeared beside my woodstove. “I didn’t think anyone would’ve known that,” she said. “I’m the only one alive.”
“Yeah, well, rumors are nasty things, aren’t they?” I asked. Now that I’d gotten a good look at her, she seemed so familiar to me. “Have we met somewhere before?” I asked, reaching up and rubbing my neck, which I was sure would be bruised soon.
“Never,” the woman said. “But I think you knew my sister.”
Then it dawned on me. “You’re Harriet Bennet’s twin, aren’t you? Susan, right?” Suddenly, the resemblance was uncanny. They must’ve been identical. I guessed I just didn’t see it right away because this woman didn’t have the enormous glasses her sister did.
Susan reached behind herself and picked up the fire poker I used to move logs around inside the woodstove. She pulled open the stove door and plunged the poker inside.
A chill ran down my spine. That wasn’t good.
“You killed your sister, didn’t you?” I asked. “You did what you did here, tonight. That’s why there weren’t any footprints beside the body…”
Susan didn’t talk. She just continued to spin the poker inside the stove, stoking the coals with it.
“I heard everything from Bella,” I said. “She said that you and Harriet got into a huge fight over an inheritance, and – ”
“It wasn’t the inheritance,” Susan said coldly, not even looking at me. “Though I hated her for that, too.”
“Then what was so important that you’d kill your own twin over?” I asked.
Susan pulled the poker from the stove and turned around to stare at me, a blank look on her face. “Because she was too close to the truth. She’d figure out what I was, and I couldn’t let her do that.”
I didn’t even have time to react. Susan disappeared again, and all I could see was a faint outline of her, and the poker looked like it was just floating in the air.
My stomach dropped.
She charged across the short distance between us, the poker held out in front of her like a sword.
I dodged, ducking behind one of the chairs in the kitchen. I picked it up and shoved it out in front of myself like a shield, knocking the poker from her hands.
It tumbled through the air and struck the wood floor with a hot hiss, searing a mark into the boards.
Susan reappeared, and she looked angry.
“Why did you come after me?” I asked.
“You were at that meeting,” Susan said. “You saw the body. You’ve been involved with other cases in Faerywood Falls. And you were getting too close to that secret, too. The Gifted need to stay hidden, and I won’t let that secret get out.”
She disappeared again, and the panic surged through me.
So Mrs. Bickford had been right. There were such things as ghost walkers. And if she was completely right, then Susan was neither alive nor dead.
How could I defend myself against something that wasn’t alive or dead?
I reached behind me and grabbed the biggest knife I could from my knife block. I held it out in front of me, in the same way Susan had held the poker.
Susan reappeared. “You’re not going to beat me,” she said. “I can’t be beaten.”
“You expect me not to defend myself against someone who broke into my house?” I asked.
Anger gushed through me like water from a broken dam, and I chucked the knife across the narrow cabin at her.
It flew through the air, a straight shot. I was certain it was going to hit…
Until it struck the wall behind her, bouncing off, and falling to the ground.
She disappeared at the last moment. It flew through her, exactly where she was standing. Except it was like she hadn’t been there at all.
She reappeared. “Sorry,” she mocked, and then disappeared once again.
Icy fear washed over me. If I couldn’t strike her with anything, then how could I defend myself?
I couldn’t.
Athena hopped down onto the floor and was chasing what looked like thin air.
She’s right here, Athena said. I can sense her!
But I don’t have anything to catch her with, I said back to her, staring dumbly around the cabin.
If you don’t, she’s going to kill both of us, Athena said.
My mind raced. I’d need something special to catch her. Did I have anything like that?
I started yanking drawers in the kitchen open, looking for something, anything, that could help.
And that was when my eyes fell on the silver arrowhead.
Dante suddenly appeared in my thoughts, showing his arrow off to those who had gone to the meeting. He said that he always carried them with him because they could take down supernatural creatures.
I knew Lucan hated silver. Cain hadn’t seemed to have any in his home, either. Come to think of it…I didn’t think I’d ever seen Mrs. Bickford wearing anything other than gold jewelry…
Did silver really hurt?
Marianne! Athena cried.
I yanked the silver arrowhead out of the drawer, and squeezed the warm compress I had in my other hand tightly.
I followed Athena’s gaze, took aim, and tossed the warm compress into the air.
Susan reappeared. “I already told you, nothing’s going to – ”
I was across the room in the same second that Athena closed her jaws around Susan’s ankle again.
Susan was too busy looking at Athena and the obvious pain she was feeling to see me approaching, arrow held high overhead…
