But she was walking her father out to her brother’s car. Mr. Gablonski was getting tired. He’d done really well, Ben thought, for his first all day outing.
“You two staying out of trouble?”
Jordan appeared at the bar where he was nursing his seven and seven next to her husband as he watched a few couples dancing. Keiffer was out there with Caitlin again. Gwen was dancing with one of the Texas guardsman, and Mason was dancing with Jill, the woman responsible for the reception’s delicious desserts, looking more at ease than he’d been in years.
“Of course,” her husband replied.
“What about you, Ben? You having a good time?” Her gaze held just a hint of mischief.
He snorted. “Not sure if I should strangle you or thank you,” he said.
Cole lifted his drink. “Heard that.”
She ignored her husband and focused on him.
Shit.
“You trying to tell me you didn’t like what was in Lea’s bag last night?”
“Ah, hell, Jordan, what did you do?” Cole’s gaze bounced from him to his wife then back again, “Sorry, Ben.”
“No reason to be sorry,” she said. “Not if you like negligees.”
“She’s wearing the damn thing now,” he said, then tossed back the rest of his drink, and motioned to the bartender for another. “Underneath her dress. All damn day.”
Cole’s mouth twitched. “Sorry, man. That has to be tough.”
Jordan smiled at her husband. “I have one on, too.” She pulled at her dress where only he could see, then patted his cheek before she turned around and walked away.
The bartender handed Ben another seven and seven. He handed it to a wide-eyed Cole. “Here, I think you could use it more than me. She must be a handful.”
Although, that probably made the man a lucky bastard.
“No thanks,” Cole refused the drink. “Yeah…she is.”
Warmth and satisfaction and something he didn’t quite recognize flittered through the man’s gaze. He winked, then walked straight to his wife, and Ben watched as Cole pressed her against one of the posts and whispered something in Jordan’s ear that had the tough as nails woman melting into the cowboy.
He turned away and downed half the drink in one gulp, his gaze searching the crowd, wishing Lea would appear so they could call it a night. And he could make her melt into him…and then he in turn could melt inside her.
“Did you miss me?”
He twisted to the right, and his shoulders relaxed as he gazed into Lea’s smiling face. “Yes. You ready to call it a night?”
Her smile faded. “I…actually, I won’t be able to stay the whole night again, Ben. Sorry. My sister’s catching the bus back to the city tonight, and I don’t want my dad to be alone.”
“Can’t you ask your sister to stay?”
Lea stared at him as if the idea was new. Because it was. She never asked for help. Always did things herself. The woman needed to give up control and let others help, too.
“It’s not as if Gwen has a photo shoot tomorrow, right?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t think so.”
He ran his hand down her arm and softened his tone. “Then ask her to stay one more night. Why does it always have to be you who takes care of your dad?”
She pulled away from his touch, her normal, open and friendly expression closed and tight. “Excuse me for being concerned about my dad,” she huffed then marched out of the pavilion.
Ben muttered a curse and strode after her. “Lea, wait up.”
She stopped near one of the big oaks, still close enough to catch the light from the party, but out of earshot, then turned to face him. “Look, I’m not going to apologize for caring about my dad.”
“It’s not about that and you know it. It’s about giving up control. Letting your brother or sister help out. Have you even asked them?”
“They’re busy. They have careers. I’m here—”
“Stalling your own. Putting your life on hold,” he cut her off, tired of hearing excuses. “You need to start living it, Lea.”
Her chin rose. “I thought that was what I was doing.”
“To a point. But now that your dad is near the end of his recovery, you should start getting your life back on track.”
“I thought that was what I was doing,” she repeated.
“Was it? Have you sent out your resumes? Or do you need to talk to your father’s doctors again?”
Anger flashed through her eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you have to stop using your father as a crutch. Start living your life. Let your brother and sister help with your dad. Share the responsibility.” He held his breath, hoping she’d see the merit in his suggestions. He liked control, but he’d also learned, long ago, to delegate authority because one person could not do it all.
She blew out a breath and nodded. “You’re right,” she said, surprising the hell out of him. “Since I’ve been back, I haven’t really asked them to do anything. I’ve just kind of jumped in and did it myself.”
“I know. I tend to do that myself, too. But it’s okay to let others help.” He chanced touching her arm again. “He’s their father too. Let them help.”
“Ben’s right,” Gwen said, appearing out of nowhere. “I can help. Just didn’t think you wanted it.”
Lea frowned at her sister. “Sure I do, but you have a career to worry about—”
“As do you,” Gwen pointed out. “So, how about we work that into all our schedules and between you, me and Ryder, we can all make sure Dad gets back to work, without putting any of our lives on hold. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“Good. It’s settled then,” Gwen touched Lea’s arm. “You enjoy yourself tonight. Let me worry about Dad. I’ll go back to the city tomorrow night. I’ll give the bus station a call right now and switch my reservation.” The woman already had her phone out as she turned and walked back toward the party.
He grabbed Lea’s hand and squeezed. “Are you okay with that?”
God, he hoped she was okay with that.
“Yes. I’m a bit surprised, but definitely okay with that.” She squeezed his hand back. “Thanks for pointing out I wasn’t asking my siblings for help. I thought I was trying to make their lives easier, but I can see where you were right. I need to let them help, too.”
He nodded. “It doesn’t mean you don’t care. It’s all right to give up control once in a while.”
A playful gleam entered her eyes. “I like when you give up control. Or take it.”
And just like that, he got hard.
“Speaking of taking…It looks like you get to take me out of that nightie after all.” She smiled and reached up to touch his face, and he had all he could do not to give voice to the whoot rolling around in his head.
“What a coincidence. I happen to be great at removing nighties,” he said, hooking her arm with his as he led them to the lodge.
Out of respect for his father, and Brandi and her guests, Ben resisted the urge—barely—to toss Lea over his shoulder and put boot to heel and rush to his room.
It was the following weekend when Lea received a quick call from Brandi letting her know the newlyweds had arrived back in Harland County safe and sound from their honeymoon.
“How was the beach?” she asked, envious of the week her friend had had of uninterrupted sex in a secluded hut on Bora Bora.
“Heaven. Nothing but sun, sand and sex.”
Lea’s insides tightened at the thought of enjoying a week like that with Ben. It didn’t compute. Between his work and his family, her work and her family, not to mention seeing all the Texans off last Sunday, they hadn’t had much more than a few stolen caresses in the supply room, or her basement this week. “I’m so envious.”
Brandi laughed. “I take that to mean things are still fun with you and Ben?”
“Yeah, when we can fit some time into our schedules.”
“S
peaking of schedules. Did you send out your resumes?” her friend asked.
What was with everyone pushing her about her resumes? They should know she didn’t need pushing. Much. She had to admit, her finger had hovered over the button a few extra seconds, but she did hit Send.
“Yes. I sent a few out on Monday.” After her sister had reassured her she’d be home by November should the doctors not give their father permission to go back to work. “There hasn’t been anything in the classifieds this week.”
“You can always apply in Houston…” Her friend’s voice was hopeful as it trailed off.
“True.” She smiled. “But I’d like to give the Big Apple a try first.”
“Okay. Just keep it in mind,” Brandi said before she hung up.
It was tough to keep anything in mind but Ben these days. Darn man occupied way too many of the brain cells he so easily destroyed when given the chance.
After three incredible nights at the lodge last weekend, she’d been forced back to reality by work. His. Hers. Gwen’s. Her sister had left Sunday evening, but not before she also reminded Lea to send out her resumes.
Applying for a job had been more of an issue than she had imagined, and Lea knew, deep down, it wasn’t solely due to her concern over her dad. It was Ben. The reality of her feelings for Ben hit her the moment she’d hit the Send button.
Finally, after all these years, she was having a…something with the man, something wonderful, and she didn’t want it to end. Each time she saw him, it was becoming increasingly clear to her. Whatever was going on between them was much more to her than having fun, and now she wasn’t sure what to do. She couldn’t tell him. He’d freak out and end their fun before she could blink. No. Those thoughts were better kept to herself, so she could enjoy him right up until she left…and beyond.
If he’d been lenient with his dating routine with Charisse and the woman’s out-of-town work schedule when he had been seeing the blonde, surely he’d consider still seeing Lea when she moved to New York. Their fun shouldn’t have to end just because she wouldn’t live in the Poconos seven days a week. There were daily buses to and from the city, eliminating the aggravation of driving, and then there were the weekends he didn’t have drill.
Maybe they could still see each other occasionally.
But even as her mind came up with these more than reasonable ideas, she knew they wouldn’t cut it with Ben. He hated New York City. Plain and simple. Hated it. He understood her desire to work there, but would never visit. He hadn’t stepped foot in the city since a few months after the towers fell.
He’d lost a good friend that day.
She could still remember waiting with Ben at the bus station. Waiting for his friend to return. After a few days, there were two cars. Two that sat unclaimed. Because their owners hadn’t made it.
Ben had been one of the volunteers to help out afterwards. He’d been gone only one week, but he’d come back a changed man. He’d already been somewhat closed off, but after volunteering, it was as if a switch had been flipped or a wire had been cut that accessed emotions.
That was over a decade ago, and Ben was just now starting to show signs of life.
He was also starting to show signs of being late. He was due to pick her up ten minutes ago to spend the day on the lake. When the phone rang, she knew it was him without even looking. It wasn’t like Ben to be late. She just hoped he was okay.
“Hi, Lea,” he said, that low, sexy voice of his never failed to receive a tremor of applause from her body. “As you already know, I’m running late. Sorry. I was helping Ethan inventory the supplies at the lodge when one of the guests went into labor while on the lake.”
From anyone else, she would’ve considered his explanation as an excuse. But this was Ben. He didn’t lie. And she’d been around the lodge and seen firsthand how some off the wall things could happen.
“No problem. Is the guest okay?”
“Yes. Scott arrived, and she’s now on the way to the hospital.” The relief in his voice was audible. “Anyhow, just wanted to let you know why I wasn’t there yet.”
“Thanks. That’s sweet,” she said. “Do you want me to drive out? This way you could finish your inventory?”
“You wouldn’t mind?”
“Of course not. I know how hard it is to keep up with two jobs. How about if I leave here in an hour?”
“Okay. Thanks.” His voice sounded a little strange as he hung up.
Could she dare to hope that mentioning two jobs had made him think about her leaving? Could he actually be a little upset at the thought?
It was the third week in October, and Ben was out behind his cabin, stacking the wood he’d cut earlier that day, getting it ready for the wood burning season that was upon them. He wasn’t sure what had happened to September. That month had flown by, and now, three quarters of October was already gone.
Time flies when you’re having fun…
The old adage shot through his mind, and a small smile tugged his lips. He’d certainly been having that. Lots of fun, although, he did limit himself to only seeing Lea once or twice a week, and since Brandi’s wedding, he hadn’t spent the full night with her again. Always keeping it to a few fun hours at his section at the lodge, or in her basement…or her office at the restaurant.
His smile broadened on that one. That lunch had been unexpected, and the sex hadn’t been planned, either, but as always the case whenever he was around the woman, he couldn’t help himself. He had to kiss her, which always led to more.
But he was working on that, by keeping away from her whenever possible. Limiting himself to those one or two rendezvous a week. Of course, his body wanted to rendezvous daily, more than once a day. That was why he disciplined himself to stay away. Keep occupied.
Like cutting and stacking wood.
His gaze shot to the hundreds of spliced pine lined up and stacked in a neat pile, waiting for his brothers to come and take over to the lodge. Yep. Lots of discipline. Hence his stacking today. It was a Saturday, and he and Lea both had the day off. He also knew for a fact she didn’t have work at the museum tomorrow, since last Sunday had been her once a month day. And that’s why he was avoiding her today. Because he’d give into his desire to stay the whole night with her again, like he’d done last month, during the weekend Brandi had gotten married.
Ben never fell asleep with the women he had sex with, but he’d done it continually with Lea. Not good. She was leaving as soon as she landed a job, and he knew she had several resumes out there. Resume he’d pushed her to send. He didn’t want her to get too attached, because he had no intentions of continuing their fun once she started working in the city.
What would be the point? They didn’t have a relationship. Just sex, and okay, friendship, but not a relationship. Her life would be centered in the city. And that was a good thing for her, but he wanted no part of the city, so once she started working there, he could no longer have any part of her. And since that was in her very near future, it was best to keep things as they were. Sex, but no falling to sleep together. No spending the whole night.
Best thing for him to do when he felt the need to see Lea, outside of their appointed time, was to get physical—by introducing an ax to firewood.
Grabbing the next piece to be split, he pushed Lea out of his mind and swung the ax, sending the blade into the wood. He lifted the ax with the wood attached and slammed the log into the stump, splitting the wood in two.
Keiffer walked into the back yard with Mason. “Hey, bro.”
“Of course you’d show up now that I’m almost done.”
His youngest brother stopped dead and whistled at the large pile. “Paul Bunyon called. He wants his ax back. And Babe. You been messing with Babe? Oh, no. That’s right. The only babe you’re messing with is Lea.”
Ben straightened and glared. “You really think it’s wise to be an ass while I have an ax in my hand?”
“He’s got a point,” Mason said with a smirk. �
�I’d listen, Keif.”
“Fine. We just came for the wood you told us to take for the lodge.”
“There it is. Have at it.”
“All of that?”
“Of course all of it.” Mason shook his head. “He’s sexually frustrated and needs to make room so he can cut more wood.”
“Now who’s the idiot egging on the man with the ax?” Keiffer asked before Ben could respond. “At least all I was doing was pointing out he has feelings for Lea that go beyond the bedroom.”
Ben reeled back. “Bullshit. I do not.” He swung the ax, driving the blade into the stump to leave it there until later when he needed to take out his frustration…shit. No. Not his frustration; he wasn’t frustrated, except maybe with his siblings.
“That was a pretty quick denial,” Keiffer pointed out.
“True, Ben, it was,” Mason agreed. “And you know what that means.”
That they wanted their heads knocked together.
Keiffer nodded. “He definitely has feelings for Lea.”
Ah, hell.
“Exactly.”
“You two need to can it.” He glared again.
“So, you really don’t care for her?”
“No,” he replied, scooping up the wood he’d just split.
It was one word. A little word, and it was out of his mouth without much work. But it felt wrong. And Ben knew why.
Because he didn’t lie.
And that word felt like the biggest damn lie he could ever tell.
But it was said, and he wasn’t going to retract it, he decided as he stacked the wood at the end of the pile.
“Then you won’t be upset to hear she landed a job from one of those interviews last week, and left for New York this morning?” Keiffer asked.
“What?” Shit. “She left already?” He whirled around to face his brother in time to see a sly smile on the guy’s soon to be bloodied face. “Very funny.”
“It was, actually. You should’ve seen your face when you thought she’d left without saying good-bye.”
“It was kind of comical. And telling,” Mason added, wise enough to back up and keep plenty of space between them.
Wyne and Dine (Citizen Soldier Series Book 1) Page 18
