by Eoin Colfer
'So, the demon warlocks wanted to move the island from plate A to plate B, but not through space, through time.'
'How do you know all this?'
'It's all in the fairy Book,' replied the Irish teenager. 'Quite a detailed description, if a bit flowery.'
The Book was the fairy Bible, containing their history and commandments. Artemis had managed to obtain a copy from a drunken sprite in Ho Chi Minh City years earlier. It was proving to be an invaluable source of information.
'I doubt the Book has too many charts and graphs,' noted Butler.
Artemis smiled. 'No, I got the specifics from Foaly, not that he knows he's sharing information.'
Butler rubbed his temples. 'Artemis. I warned you not to mess with Foaly. The decoy thing is bad enough.'
Artemis was fully aware that Foaly was tracking him and any decoys he sent out. In fact he only sent out the decoys to make Foaly dip into his funds. It was his idea of a joke.
'I didn't initiate the surveillance,' objected Artemis. 'Foaly did. I found over a dozen devices on my computers alone. All I did was reverse the spike to get into some of his shared files. Nothing classified. Well, maybe a few. Foaly's been busy since he left the LEP.'
'So, what did Foaly's files tell you?' said Butler resignedly.
'They told me about magic. Basically, magic is energy and the ability to manipulate energy. To move Hybras from A to B, the demon warlocks harnessed the power of their volcano to create a time rent, or tunnel.'
Artemis rolled his napkin into a tube, popped the salt cellar into it and deposited the cellar on Butler's plate.
'Simple as that?' said Butler doubtfully.
'Not really,' said Artemis. 'In fact the warlocks did an exceptional job,
considering the instruments available to them at the time. They had to calculate the power of the volcano, the size of the island, the energy of each individual demon on the island, not to mention the reverse pull of lunar attraction. It's amazing the spell worked as well as it did.'
'There was a glitch?'
'Yes. According to the Book, the warlocks induced the volcano, but the force was too strong. They couldn't control it and the magic circle was broken. Hybras and the demons were transported, but the warlocks were blasted into space.'
Butler whistled. 'That's quite a glitch.'
'It's more than a glitch. The demon warlocks were all killed, so now the rest of the pride are stuck in Limbo, held by a magical spell that was never meant to be permanent, without a warlock to bring them back.'
'Couldn't Foaly go and get them?'
'No. It would be an impossible mission to recreate the same circumstances. Imagine trying to steer a feather in a sandstorm, then land the feather on a particular grain of sand, except you don't know where the grain is. And even if you did know where the grain was, demon magic can only be controlled by a demon. They are by far the most powerful of warlocks.'
'Tricky,' admitted Butler. 'So, tell me why these demons are popping up here, now?'
Artemis corrected him with a wagging finger. 'Not just here, and not just now. The demons have always felt an attraction to their home world, a combination of lunar and terrestrial radiations. But a demon could only be pulled back if he was at his end of the time-tunnel mouth, the crater, and not wearing a dimensional anchor.'
Butler fingered his wristband. 'Silver.'
'That's right. Now because of massively increased radiation levels worldwide, the pull on demons is much stronger and reaches critical level with greater frequency.'
Butler was struggling to keep up. Sometimes it was not easy being a genius's bodyguard.
'Artemis, I thought we weren't going into specifics.'
Artemis continued regardless. He was hardly going to stop now, in mid-lecture.
'Bear with me, old friend. Nearly there. So now, energy spikes occur more often than Foaly thinks.'
Butler raised a finger. 'Ah yes, but the demons are OK as long as they stay away from the crater.'
Artemis raised a triumphant finger. 'Yes!' he crowed. "That's what you would think. That's what Foaly thinks. But when our last demon was off course, I ran the equation from back to front. My conclusion is that the time spell is decaying. The tunnel is unravelling.'
Artemis allowed the napkin tube to widen in his hand. 'Now the catchment area is bigger, as is the deposit area. Pretty soon, demons won't be safe anywhere on Hybras.'
Butler asked the obvious question. 'What happens when the tunnel decays altogether?'
'Just before that happens, demons all over Hybras will be plucked off the island, silver or no silver. When the tunnel collapses, some will be deposited on earth, more on the moon and the rest scattered through space and time. One thing is for sure, not many of them will survive, and those that do will be locked up in laboratories and zoos.
Butler frowned. 'We need to tell Holly about this.' 'Yes,' agreed Artemis.
'But not just yet. I need one more day to confirm my figures. I'm not going to Foaly with nothing but theory.'
'Don't tell me,' said Butler. 'Sicily, right?'
So now they were in the Massimo Bellini Theatre, and Butler had barely half an idea why they were there. If a demon materialized on that stage, then Artemis was right and the fairy People were in major trouble. And if the fairies were in trouble, then it was up to Artemis to help them. Butler was actually quite proud that his young charge was doing something for somebody else for a change. Even so, they had only a week to complete their task and return to Fowl Manor, because in seven days Artemis's parents returned from Rhode Island where Artemis
Fowl Senior had finally taken possession of an artificial bio-hybrid leg, to replace the one he had lost when the Russian Mafiya blew up his ship.
Butler peered out of the box at the hundreds of golden arches and the thirteen hundred-odd people enjoying the evening's performance of Bellini's Norma.
'First a Gaudi building, now this theatre,' commented the bodyguard, his words audible only to Artemis, thanks to their box's isolation and the booming volume of the opera. 'Don't these demons ever materialize somewhere quiet?'
Artemis replied in a whisper. 'Just let the sublime music flow over you, enjoy the show. Don't you know how difficult it is to get a box for a Vincenzo Bellini opera? Especially Norma. Norma combines the requirements of both a coloratura and a dramatic soprano. And the soprano is excellent, comparable to Callas herself.'
Butler grunted. Perhaps it was difficult for ordinary people to get a box in the theatre, but Artemis had simply called his billionaire environmentalist friend Giovanni Zito. The Sicilian had gladly surrendered his own box, in exchange for two cases of the finest Bordeaux. Hardly surprising since Artemis had recently invested over ten million euros in Zito's water purification research.
A Sicilian drinking Bordeaux? Artemis had chuckled down the phone. You should be ashamed of yourself.
'Keep your watch pointed at the stage,' directed Artemis, interrupting Butler's thoughts. 'The chances are miniscule that a demon will be caught without silver, even away from the crater, but if one does show up, I want it on film to prove to Foaly that my theory is correct. If we don't have incontrovertible proof, the fairy Council will never take action.'
Butler checked that his watch crystal that doubled as a camera lens was angled towards the stage. 'The camera is fine, but if you don't mind I won't be letting the sublime music flow over me, I have enough to do keeping you safe.'
The Bellini Theatre was a bodyguard's nightmare. Multiple entrances and exits, over a thousand patrons that refused to be frisked, hundreds of golden arches that could conceal a gunman and countless nooks, crannies and corridors that probably didn't appear on the theatre plan.
Nevertheless, Butler was reasonably confident that he had done all he could to protect Artemis.
Of course there were certain things that bodyguards could not guard against, as Butler was about to find out. Invisible things.
Artemis's phone vibrated gently. Usuall
y Artemis deplored the kind of person who kept their phone on during a performance, but this phone was special and he never turned it off. It was the fairy communicator given to him by Holly Short, plus a few modifications and add-ons made by Artemis himself.
The phone was the size and shape of a two-euro coin, with a pulsing red crystal at its centre. This was a fairy omni-sensor, which could interface with any communications system, including the human body. The phone was disguised as a rather ostentatious ring on Artemis's middle finger.
Artemis twisted the ring so that the phone sat on his palm, then closed his middle fingers, extending his thumb and little finger. The sensor would decode vibrations in his little finger and send them as voice patterns. It would also use the bones in his hand to transmit the caller's voice to the tip of his thumb.
Artemis looked for all the world like a young boy talking on an imaginary phone.
'Holly?' he said.
Butler watched as Artemis listened for a few moments, then hung up, twisting the phone back into ring position.
He looked steadily at Butler. 'Don't draw your weapon,' he said.
Which of course had Butler reaching for the butt of his Sig Sauer.
'It's fine,' said Artemis reassuringly. 'Someone is here. A friend.'
Butler's hand dropped to his side. He knew who it was.
Holly Short materialized in the velvet-covered seat beside Artemis. Her knees were drawn to her chin and her pointed ears were covered by a black helmet. As she fizzled into the visible spectrum, a full-face visor collapsed into sections and stored itself in her helmet. Her arrival among the humans was covered by the theatre's darkness.
'Afternoon, Mud Boys,' she said, smiling. Her hazel eyes sparkled impishly, or more accurately elfishly.
'Thanks for calling ahead,' said Butler sarcastically. 'Wouldn't want to spook anyone. No shimmer?'
Usually when fairies used their magic to shield, the only thing visible was a slight shimmer, like a heat haze. Holly's entrance had been completely undetectable.
Holly patted her own shoulder. 'New suit. Made entirely from smart wafers. It vibrates with me.'
Artemis studied one of the wafers, noting the microfilaments in the material. 'Foaly's work? Section Eight issue'.
Holly could not hide her surprise. She punched Artemis playfully on the shoulder. 'How do you know about Section Eight? Aren't we allowed any secrets?'
'Foaly shouldn't spy on me,' said Artemis. 'Where there's a way in, there's a way back. I suppose I should congratulate you on the new job.
And Foaly too.' He nodded at the tiny lens over Holly's right eye. 'Is he watching us now?'
'No. He's trying to figure out how you know what he doesn't. We're taping, though.'
'I presume you're talking about demons.'
'I might be.'
Butler stepped between them, interrupting the verbal sparring that was bound to follow.
'Before you two get into negotiations, how about a real hello?'
Holly smiled fondly at the huge bodyguard. She activated the electronic wings built into her suit and hovered to his eye level. Holly kissed his cheek, then wrapped her arms all the way round his head. They barely made it.
Butler rapped her helmet. 'Nice equipment. Not run-of-the-mill Lower Elements Police.'
'No,' agreed Holly, removing the helmet. 'This Section Eight stuff is years ahead of standard LEP. You get what you pay for, I suppose.'
Butler plucked the helmet from her hands. 'Anything an old soldier would be interested in?'
Holly pressed a button on her wrist computer. 'Check out the night vision. It's as clear as… well. . day. And the clever thing is that the filter reacts to light as it passes through, so no more being blinded by camera flashes.'
Butler nodded appreciatively. Night vision's major drawback had historically been that it left the soldier vulnerable to sudden flashes of light. Even a candle flame could blind the wearer momentarily.
Artemis cleared his throat. 'Excuse me, Captain. Are you two going to weep salty tears of admiration over a helmet all night, or do we have matters to discuss?'
Holly winked at Butler. 'Your master calls. I better see what he wants.'
Holly deactivated her wings, settling into the chair. She folded her arms, looking Artemis straight in the eyes.
'OK, Mud Boy. I'm all yours.'
'Demons. We need to talk about demons.'
Holly's eyes lost their playful twinkle. 'And why are you so interested in demons, Artemis?'
Artemis opened two shirt buttons and pulled out a gold coin on a thong.
The coin had a circular hole in the centre. Put there by a blast from Holly's laser.
'You gave this to me after you saved my father's life. I owe you. I owe the People. So now, I'm doing something for them.'
Holly wasn't entirely convinced. 'Usually before you do anything for the People, you negotiate a fee.'
Artemis accepted the accusation with a slight nod. 'It's true. It was true, but I have changed.'
Holly folded her arms. 'And?'
'And it's nice to find something Foaly missed, even if I did stumble on to it by accident.'
'And?'
Artemis sighed. 'Very well. There is another factor.'
'I thought so. What do you want? Gold? Technology?'
'No. Nothing like that.'
Artemis sat forward in his seat. 'Have you any idea how difficult it is to have had all those thrilling adventures with the LEP and suddenly not be a part of that world any more?'
'Yes,' replied Holly. 'Actually I do.'
'I went from saving the world to geometry in a week. I'm bored, Holly.
My intellect is not being challenged, so when I came across the demon gospel in the Book, I realized that here was a way to be involved without affecting things. I could simply observe, and perhaps refine,
Foaly's calculations.'
'Which are not actually in the Book,' Holly pointed out. 'Simply observe, my foot.'
Artemis waved Holly's point away. 'Some harmless hacking. The centaur started it. So, I began travelling to materialization sites, but nothing happened until Barcelona. A demon showed up all right, except he showed up in the wrong place, and late. I simply stumbled across him. I would be floating in prehistoric space right now if Butler hadn't anchored me to this dimension with silver.'
Holly stifled a laugh. 'So it was luck. The great Artemis Fowl trumps the mighty Foaly thanks to dumb luck.'
Artemis was miffed. 'Informed luck, I think, is a better description.
Anyway, that is unimportant. I have recalculated with the new figures, and my conclusions, if borne out, could be calamitous for the People.'
'Go on, tell me. In short words, though. You wouldn't believe the amount of science I had to listen to today.'
'This is serious, Holly,' snapped Artemis. His outburst was followed by a chorus of shushes from the audience.
'This is serious,' he repeated in hushed tones.
'Why?' asked Holly. 'Surely it's just a matter of sharing your new figures and letting Foaly take care of the rest with light-distortion projectors?'
'Not quite,' said Artemis, settling back in his chair. 'If a demon appears on that stage in the next four minutes, then soon there won't be enough projectors to go round. If I'm right and the time spell is unravelling, then Hybras and everyone on it will soon be dragged back into this dimension. Most of the demons won't make it alive, but those who do could pop up anywhere and at any time.'
Holly switched her gaze to the stage. A raven-haired woman was holding ridiculously high notes for a ridiculously long time. Holly wondered if the woman would even notice a demon popping out of the air for a second or two. There wasn't supposed to be a materialization today. If there was, then that would mean Artemis was right, as usual, and a lot more demons were on the way. If that happened, then
Artemis Fowl and Holly Short would be up to their necks in the whole saving-the-fairy-race thing, yet again.
Holly glanced sideways at Artemis, who was studying the stage through a pair of opera glasses. She would never tell him, but if a human had to be involved with saving the fairy People, then Artemis was probably the best man, or boy, for the job.
the island of hybras, Limbo
No.1 struggled up towards the first rocky ridge on the side of the volcano. Several demons passed him on the trail, but not one tried to talk him out of it. In fact, he'd bumped into Hadley Shrivelington
Basset, who had offered to scratch a map on a piece of bark for him.
No.1 suspected that if he did take the big dimensional jump, no one would miss him any more than they would miss their favourite crossbow target. Except perhaps the demoness with red markings who smiled at him. The one from the compound. Maybe she would miss him a little.
No.1 stopped in his tracks when he realized that the only demon who would care if he was gone was one he had never spoken to.
He moaned aloud. How depressing was that!
No.1 trudged onwards past the final warning which, with typical demon subtlety, was in the form of a blood-reddened wolf skull mounted on a stick.
'What's that even supposed to mean?' muttered No.1 as he passed the sign. 'A wolf's head on a stick. Big wolf barbecue tonight. Bring your own wolf.'
Barbecue. Another word from Lady Heatherington Smythe.
No.1 sat on the ridge, wiggling his rump to dig a little trench for his tail.
Might as well be comfortable before jumping the hundred or so metres into the mouth of a steaming volcano. Of course, even if he didn't get whisked away to the old country, the still wouldn't be vaporized by the lava. No, he would probably be dashed against the rocks on the way down. What a cheery thought.
From his seat on the ridge, No.1 could see the jagged mouth of the crater and the rhythmic wisps of smoke that drifted skywards like the breath of a sleeping giant. It was the nature of the time spell that things progressed as though Hybras were still attached to the rest of the world, albeit at a different pace. So the volcano still bubbled and occasionally burped up a skinny column of flame, even though there was no Earth beneath it.
