“You and Bashrik enjoy whatever you plan to get up to on this fine, sunny morning, and we’ll see you for dinner later,” I said, relishing the embarrassed looks my words elicited from the pair of them. Bashrik was literally looking at everything other than Angie, while her cheeks went scarlet.
Navan grinned, giving his brother a pat on the back. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” he said, leaning down to plant a kiss on my lips, as if to prove a point.
With that, I looped my arm through Navan’s, and we set off toward the training center. Lauren followed as far as the palace before disappearing inside with an amused wave of farewell.
It was the first morning in a long time that I actually felt good about things. With the passing weeks, my stamina and recovery time had improved on the training grounds. Now, I barely noticed the aches and bruises, and if I did, it meant I’d taken a particularly brutal hit that deserved to hurt. The day-to-day strain of the tasks no longer affected me, and it felt glorious to be able to say that.
Moreover, I was acing my flying tasks, both with wings and in the training ships, and was managing to hold my own in hand-to-hand simulations. The only thing was, I wished my wings were more permanent. I was almost at the end of my second vial, with about a quarter left after strict training-only rationing, but I hoped I could ask for more when I ran out.
During training itself, Navan had backed off, after I’d asked him to, but he still couldn’t help himself when it came to the big battle scenarios. I would catch sight of him creeping around a ruin, keeping an eye on me, believing I had no idea what he was doing. It usually ended in him getting himself killed in the simulation, but I was getting better at defending him, keeping him safer for longer in those situations. I was no longer the puny Kryptonian who only had knives at her disposal. I was formidable now, able to take down multiple enemies within a few seconds of letting my knives fly, while drawing my weapons back without it turning into a friendly-fire situation.
I was proving my worth in a hostile environment, and the other trainees were noticing. Two days ago, Iskra had offered her hand to help me up after a particularly long and vigorous sparring session. And then, yesterday, a guy named Orval had slapped me on the back after a flying fight, whooping about how awesome I’d been. The slap on the back had nearly ended with me falling flat on my face, but the sentiment had been a welcome change.
I didn’t know why they were being kinder to me, and the shift in mood almost made me suspicious, but it seemed genuine enough. I had thought they’d be bitter that I was succeeding, but I had shown my determination to be part of their team, if nothing else. One of the officers had even nodded at me as he gave a speech about how a unit was only as strong as its weakest member, the others nodding along.
“You seem very smiley this morning,” Navan said, putting his arm around my shoulders.
I grinned wider. “Today feels like a good one, don’t you think?” I asked, slipping my arm around his waist. Things still hadn’t progressed between us, physically. That moment hadn’t arrived yet, but I was safe in the knowledge that it would, when the time was right. He didn’t seem in any rush, though we’d had a few heated evenings, spent tangled in one another’s arms. That was enough for me, and it seemed to be enough for him, for now.
“It does feel like a good one,” Navan agreed, lifting his face to the sunlight.
We were still in good spirits as we headed to the locker rooms, changing quickly before getting out onto the training floor, separating to take up our positions with our sparring partners. I had Iskra again, while Navan was facing off against a bulky coldblood whose name I could never remember. It sounded like Seth, but I knew it couldn’t be something as Earthen as that.
It was an intense morning session, with Iskra challenging me at every turn. Even so, it couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. I could feel myself getting stronger thanks to the training, and that was worth every move that floored me. I learned from my mistakes, remembering her body language so I didn’t fall for the same trick again. Not just that, but I was learning how to read coldbloods in general. A curious thing happened when they were flagging—their veins darkened every couple of seconds, flashing like beacons. I guessed it was because the blood was pumping faster to their hearts, but it was a sure sign they were weakening, and I knew just how to take advantage of it.
In fact, Iskra’s veins were doing just that as she charged toward me. Thinking fast, I sidestepped one of her favorite attacks and brought my foot down on the back of her legs, watching in delight as she sank to the ground.
“Nice counter!” she said as I helped her up, an impressed smile on her face. “You’re getting good, Riley. I’m going to have to start watching my back.” She chuckled, wiping a bead of sweat from her brow.
“I’m getting there,” I said coyly, adrenaline coursing through my veins. Somehow, I felt like I was doing this for the human race, even though nobody knew I was anything other than “Kryptonian.” This was my chance to prove we weren’t puny underlings, but a scrappy, defiant species that could put up a decent fight.
We were about to start another round when everyone’s heads snapped toward the door of the training room. It burst open, and Pandora and the queen strode through, flanked by a handful of guards. It wasn’t like Brisha to come with such an extended entourage, and the sight of it filled my heart with dread. Had we done something wrong? Had Pandora double-crossed us? I noticed her eyes seeking me out, a cold smile on her lips.
“Gather round, soldiers. I have good news for you,” Queen Brisha announced as she came to a halt in the center of the room. We did as she asked, hurrying toward her and forming a haphazard circle.
I sought Navan out and stood beside him as we waited to hear what the queen had to say. Something about her manner troubled me, even with her announcement that she had good news to deliver.
“I have a mission for you to undertake,” the queen continued, lifting her chin proudly. “I have selected your particular squadron, as you are the finest of my trainee intake. However, you can’t all go on this particular mission, and so I have selected the best among you to partake. This is not a decision I have made lightly, but I know you will not let me down when the time comes. Upon completion of this mission, those involved shall graduate early, earning their emblem,” she said solemnly. This mission had to be the news Pandora had alluded to—the dangling carrot of doom.
“A select group of you are going to wage a counterattack on Queen Gianne,” Pandora explained, taking over for the queen at her approving nod. “You are going to infiltrate the South and place explosives in and around her famed Observatory. This will take down almost all the surveillance that she has, as well as send the message that we mean business. It will leave her vulnerable, so we can show her that her defiance of the peace treaty will not be tolerated. She can’t expect to attack us without consequences. Enough time, and enough benevolence, has gone by, and now is the time for action,” she boomed. The other soldiers whooped and hollered, beating their fists against their chests in a peculiar percussion. All but Navan and me.
“Queen Brisha, I must protest this!” Navan shouted above the din, silencing the room and surprising me. “That is not a counterattack; that is an act of terrorism, Your Highness. Innocent civilians visit that site every day—workers, tourists, and everything in between. If you hit the Observatory, you will kill thousands. I implore you to reconsider. After all, they didn’t strike against you, Your Highness. Your sister did!”
“It is a counterattack,” the queen replied curtly, “and that is the nature of war. People die, Navan. You are a soldier, drafted in to do a job. I suggest you revise your moral compass when it comes to the enemy. Do not forget whose side you are on.” She scowled, evidently displeased at being called out in front of her militia. Plus, I had the feeling she wasn’t about to let another Idrax embarrass her.
In fact, I was sure that was where this change in pace had come from. Before Bashrik had spurned her, her focus
had been on obtaining his affections. Now, with him out of the picture and her heart in pieces, her desire for revenge had clearly undergone a renaissance. I cursed silently, knowing we might have prevented this if Bashrik had played along and kissed Brisha instead. Then again, how good could I say my moral compass was, if I was willing to put a man out as bait, hurting my friend’s feelings in the process? No, we’d definitely been between a rock and a hard place. I just hadn’t expected an all-out act of terrorism to come from it.
“Why not your sister’s alchemy lab, or a military base, Your Highness? Surely, that would be a more direct retaliation?” Navan pressed. I nodded along, guessing there would be fewer civilians in those places.
“I do not need to explain my decisions to you, Navan Idrax,” Queen Brisha retorted. “I have selected the Observatory because it will not only hit her where it hurts, but it is isolated, meaning a greater chance of my soldiers getting in and out undetected.”
Navan grimaced. “Fewer guards, more civilians, you mean?”
“I will have you locked up if you speak another word against me!” Queen Brisha snapped, her eyes glittering with fury. With all that had happened with Bashrik, I’d forgotten just how terrifying and fierce she could be. “You are on my list to partake in this mission, Navan, and you will go, or you will face corporal punishment. You are my soldier now, but if you no longer wish to be, then I have no further need of you. Make your choice, Idrax,” she barked.
My heart pounded. A tense silence stretched between the two of them, with everyone’s eyes fixed on the scene. I gripped Navan’s arm, hoping it would get him to see sense. Launching an attack was an awful thing, but protesting it wouldn’t stop her, and I didn’t want him killed.
“Is Riley on your list, Your Highness?” he asked quietly, the tension almost unbearable.
Queen Brisha smiled bitterly. “No, she is not. I would not put her in harm’s way,” she replied, her expression softening as she let her gaze settle on me.
“Then I will do as you’ve asked, Your Highness,” he said, his voice low. “My loyalties lie with you. I am a soldier, and I will do my duty.”
“Good,” Queen Brisha remarked. “Those who are on my list will receive details of their mission soon. Your training is complete for today. Return to your homes, refresh yourselves, and expect word to come. Be prepared. This is one of the most important missions you will ever undertake, and you do it all in my name. I thank you for your service,” she said solemnly, before striding out of the room, her entourage in tow.
Navan and I looked at one another, not knowing what to say.
* * *
After changing out of our training uniforms and stowing our weapons, we took our time returning to our chambers, neither of us speaking on the walk over. His hand held mine, but we had no words. Even though it looked like Pandora was otherwise engaged with the queen’s newfound focus, there was no telling who might be listening. And so, we said nothing until we were back in the safety of our room.
“I don’t want you to go,” I said, as soon as the door was closed. “It’s too dangerous. You’ll end up dead, and I can’t cope with that.” Tears pricked my eyes, and I gripped his hands, afraid to let go.
He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. “I’ll be fine, Riley. I promise you, I will come back, and everything will be okay.”
I shook my head. “I’ll be sitting here, sick with worry, until you come back through those doors,” I murmured, looping my arms around Navan’s neck. He held me, holding my gaze as I stared into his slate eyes.
“I’m just worried about those poor civilians,” he said, a sadness creeping into his eyes. “There has to be a way we can reduce the fallout.”
“We can think about that tomorrow,” I said. “Right now, I just want to commit as much of you to memory as possible, to give me something to focus on when you leave,” I urged, holding his face in my hands as I leaned in to kiss him. It was a desperate, urgent kiss. A goodbye kiss.
His hands ran up my spine as the kiss deepened, his tongue exploring my mouth, his fingertips searching every contour of my skin. I shivered in anticipation as he lifted my shirt over my head and cast it to the floor, his kisses trailing down my neck and across my collarbone, moving downward. I gripped him tighter, pressing against him, wanting to feel as much of him as possible, in case I never saw him again.
He lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around him as he carried me over to the sofa and lay me down on the soft cushions, the fire roaring beside us. Grasping for the edges of his shirt, I practically tore it off him and sent it flying to the ground, reveling in the delicious friction of his skin against mine.
We were both reaching for the buttons of each other’s pants when a knock ricocheted through the room like a gunshot, making us freeze. Not knowing who it might be, but fairly sure we didn’t want to get caught in this situation again, we scrabbled for our clothes, throwing them back on as fast as possible.
More or less fully clothed, Navan approached the door and opened it cautiously, while I crept up behind him, wanting to see who had disturbed what might have been the greatest night of my life. To my shock, Queen Brisha was standing in the hallway, a stern expression on her face.
“I have further news to impart,” she said, eyeing us curiously. We were still out of breath, and Navan’s hair was a mess.
“What can we do for you, Your Highness?” I asked, trying not to pant.
“It’s about the mission,” she explained. “I’ve changed my mind.”
“Changed your mind, Your Highness?” I felt dizzy with relief at the thought that Navan wouldn’t have to leave—that he wouldn’t have to fight.
“I have decided that you should also go on the mission, Riley,” Queen Brisha stated, shattering my hopes.
Navan opened his mouth to object, but the queen interrupted. “If you say a word against my decision, I will banish you both to the farthest reaches of this realm.”
“I’m not questioning your authority, Your Highness, but… why? Why must you do this?” Navan asked, clearly dumbfounded.
The queen’s gaze flickered between the two of us, and I saw the jealousy in her eyes. “This is because of you, Navan. I want you to know that. She would have been safe, if you had not spoken out of turn,” she spat, her face twisting into a bitter mask of contempt. “I expect you to be there when the rest of the soldiers leave. If you aren’t, I will track you down, and I will end you both.”
It almost brought me to tears, to see Queen Brisha like this. Where once our love had inspired her, now it embittered her. As she turned and headed for the elevator, I felt regret twist in my stomach. More than anything, I wished I had told her that Bashrik hadn’t reciprocated her feelings, so I might have spared her the pain she felt… and the suffering she felt it necessary to inflict upon us.
It wasn’t Bashrik’s fault, and it wasn’t her fault. It was mine. I had broken her heart by not telling her the truth, and I knew the crazy things people did when their hearts were in pieces. I wished I could put it back together again for her, though that was the hardest task in the universe. A heart, once broken, was never the same again.
Chapter Nineteen
Word came at dawn, via a holographic message that flickered to life in our chambers. I was already awake, not having been able to sleep after Brisha’s unexpected visit. After the news, neither Navan nor I had felt like resuming what we’d been up to before she interrupted. Instead, we curled up in each other’s arms and struggled to drift off. Eventually, I had given up, choosing to just lie there with his arms around me, enjoying the closeness while I had the chance. I was getting better in training, but I was nowhere near ready to enter a real-life mission. If it came to blows, I just hoped I could keep up—and not get Navan killed.
The message told us to meet around the back of the palace in an hour’s time, at the tunnel entrance where we had first entered Brisha’s queendom. It added that we should wear civilian clothes beneath our military fatigues, t
hough it didn’t go into detail as to why. With that, it cut off, leaving me to the turmoil of my own thoughts.
I had gotten so used to this part of Vysanthe that it felt strange to be going back to the South. Plus, the circumstances of our return weren’t exactly great. All I could think about were the civilians who might lose their lives because of us. This was not what I’d signed up for. I didn’t want to kill anyone. I didn’t want anyone to die because of me.
All through the night, I’d wondered if there was a way we might prevent people from dying, but I hadn’t managed to come up with anything. It seemed too vast a task for one person, or even two people to undertake, without alerting suspicion. And, right now, we couldn’t risk crossing Brisha or Pandora, for fear of what they might do in retribution. Pandora in particular. She seemed to fully support Brisha’s decision, for whatever reason, which had to mean Orion did, too.
“You want something to eat?” Navan asked groggily, wandering into the kitchen. I knew he hadn’t gotten much sleep either.
I shook my head. “I’m not hungry,” I said quietly.
“You should get your strength up. You’ll need it. There’s no telling when you might get the chance to eat again,” he said, slicing up some fruit and putting it into a bowl. He took down a vial for himself, drinking the fluid in one gulp before handing the bowl to me.
I took it from him, grimacing at the sight. My stomach was in knots, my mouth dry, my eyes tired. The last thing I wanted to do was force breakfast down my throat, but I could see the sense in his advice. Reluctantly, I worked through the slices, chewing slowly, gulping the sweet fruit down before my body could reject it.
After breakfast, I dressed in black military fatigues, with my civilian clothes underneath, and laced up my combat boots, pulling my hair back into a ponytail before splashing cold water on my face. I looked at Navan’s reflection in the mirror. He stood in the doorway of the bathroom, a worried expression on his face.
Hotbloods Book 3_Renegades Page 16
