by Ryan Michele
Mom. Are you fucking kidding me? I’ve known this man all of a day, and now he’s talking about me being a mom to his kid? I didn’t know the first fucking thing about kids. Never thought I’d have any. Why does the damn thought excite me? Why does being with Cruz ignite me?
Emotions, I fucking hated them. They always turned me into a blubbering idiot, which was exactly why I’ve stayed away from any type of relationship. Made my head feel heavy and crazy. I’d much rather stick to my hard shell and not feel.
A hard knock on the door had me covering my head with the blankets, trying to escape from everything and everyone, but its persistence made me get my sorry ass up. Opening the door, the oxygen left my body at the sight of Cruz standing in front of me. His tight black shirt fit his body like a glove, showing off every curve of his muscles. His hair was its normal disheveled self, and his eyes were on fire with lust.
My pulse picked up as blood began racing through my body. My heart was about ready to burst out of my chest as the air around us became electrified. Remembering the night before, and the intensity that came from Cruz, I knew I needed him. Dammit.
The sexy smirk gracing his face told me he knew exactly what I was thinking. Shaking myself out, “Whatcha need?” My tone had a small bit of its punch back. When G.T. found us together, I didn’t know what happened to me. I knew I sounded like a sullen child, but in a way, I was. I embarrassed myself, and I didn’t like that feeling. Too many memories started flooding my mind that I wanted to keep locked up, and I needed to get away from him. Time to snap my shit back.
“Talk,” was the only word he uttered, confusing me. I raised my eyebrow and crossed my arms over my chest.
“About?” The defiance came back fully.
“Stop the fucking bullshit. What the hell was that this morning?” His sexy voice washed over me, remembering the words he grunted in my ears over the course of the night while he thought I was sleeping. That voice alone can cause a woman’s panties to fly, so forceful, deep and sexy.
“Nothing to talk about. It was a mistake.” Normally, men would be happy with a one night fuck and leave me the hell alone. But not Cruz for some fucking reason.
“The fuck it was a mistake. You didn’t feel that way when my dick was pushing in and out of that tight pussy of yours.” Wetness seeped out of me from his gruff words. I couldn’t help but get hot as hell when he talked this way. It made every part of me tingle something no man has ever fully done before.
“I’m not one of those women out on the couch. I can’t be.” I steeled my voice, not letting the vulnerability come through. I’d already given him enough of that shit this morning.
“Why the fuck you are so hung up on this shit I don’t know. But you need to deal with it and get the fuck over it. Now. Do you want me to treat you like a whore? I can arrange that. But I don’t fucking want to. That’s the damn difference.”
“What happens when you’re done? I know the rules. I’ll be banned. This is the only life I’ve ever known.” Damn if this man didn’t bring out all my weaknesses even when I tried to hide it. Family. I didn’t want to lose my family.
“First, I ain’t gonna be done. Second, any of these men touch you, I’ll pound their asses down.” He stepped closer closing the door behind him. The room instantly became electrified with a current so strong it was pulling me under. “Third, I didn’t say you were my momma. I said you were my girl, my woman, my ol’ lady. End of discussion.” He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me to him. I didn’t want to resist. My body was in such a tornado it was making my head spin.
“You don’t even know me.”
Looking up into his blue eyes, they warmed me, and my insides melted. Dammit. “Let’s go over what I know. You’re strong; you met me blow for blow, stood up to me when no other female would even dare, you’ve got balls of fucking steel, and know how to take care of yourself. And you’re good with my kid, who’s already taking quite a liking to you. Fast. Yeah. But that’s how I live my life. I see it. I take it. I’m taking you.”
Uncertainty ran through me, but my body was craving this man’s touch, craving those magical lips to send me over the edge. Everything around me was swirling out of control. Why the hell was this happening? I’m so damn sure of myself all the damn time, one day with this man, and I’m questioning everything.
Fuck it.
Gripping Cruz’s shirt, I pulled him hard, down to my lips as I took what I needed from him, and he gave, punishing me in return. “I’m glad you see things my way,” he murmured, before cupping my ass and lifting me up as I wrapped my legs around his body and my back crashed against the door. Our lips and hands attacked each other in a frenzy of lust.
Everything happened so damn fast that before I could process what was going on, my pants were removed; Cruz was sleeved and balls deep inside of me. His body hammering into mine so hard and so fast that I forgot where I was, much less… who I was. My body became one huge nerve ending that was on the verge of imploding.
Cruz’s name escaped my lips as he gasped my name giving two more thrusts and slowly stilling as we came together. Our breathing was unbelievably labored, and I rested my head on his shoulder trying to regain myself.
I shook my head at the realization that this would happen. If for nothing else, his dick was becoming a drug, and I wanted more. Hopefully, he’d prove to be worth the risk.
Two Days Later
My legs spread wide as I gathered myself in my stance. It’d been so long since I’ve done this, practice. I was damn well gonna hit that fucking target over and over.
Raising my arms, I cupped my girl in my hands, loving the weight of her. As I squeezed the trigger over and over, the familiar lulling sound of each shot going off made me smile. Keeping my eye on the target, I kept firing.
As I pushed the button that brought my target close, I was ecstatic to see that I’d hit my mark repeatedly. Bitch has still got it.
“Great shot,” Cruz’s smooth voice came from behind me. Turning, I smiled and stared into those gorgeous blue eyes of his. These past two days have been a whirlwind. Not only was I trying to learn the ins and outs since being locked up, I was learning about this strong man behind me. And damn if he didn’t send my entire life into a spiral, good or bad was still up for debate.
“Look,” I pulled down my target sheet handing it to him as I added another.
“You killed him; that’s for sure.”
“Her…”
“What?” Cruz eyed me as if he heard wrong.
“You said I killed him… when it’s actually, I killed her.”
“Babs?” I nodded, pushing the button to send my target back through the chute.
“I’m firing!” I yelled out seconds before I began blasting the target again, thinking of Babs bleeding on the ground, gurgling her last breath. It only fueled me up as I kept shooting, adding another clip, going for it again, not stopping until the paper was dangling off the grip.
Placing my gun in my holster, I turned around to see Cruz staring at me. “What?”
“I know the brothers taught you to shoot, but damn babe.” His body moved closer to mine as his hands filtered through my hair, pulling it, so his eyes met mine. “Fucking hot.”
His lips smothered mine in his signature, sexy way as my body instantly reacted. Over the last couple of days, my body had tuned itself with Cruz’s, wanting him more than I ever thought possible. Not that I would tell him that, but my body couldn’t lie.
The clearing of a throat brought our deep kiss to a stop as we looked over to see Rocky standing at the doorway to the range.
“What’s up man?” Cruz asked as he wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
“Came to shoot,” Rocky’s voice was so quiet, I felt like if I could squint my ears to hear better I would. But what got me was his voice. There was something about it. Something familiar, but I couldn’t place it.
“You done?” Cruz asked, looking down at me while I smiled, nodding. “All yours man.�
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“Thanks…” Cruz slapped Rocky’s shoulder as he walked by. When he breezed past me, my body went on alert, full-blown red alert. Something. I didn’t know what the hell it was, but something with him was setting me off, and not in a good way.
Turning, I stared at him. His long hair, beard, and lanky body were nothing that I’d ever seen before. Racking my brain, I tried to place him, but came up blank. As we walked out of the range, Cruz must have sensed something off. “What’s wrong?”
Not one to shy away, I said, “Rocky. Was he around before I went in prison?”
“No, why?”
“I don’t know. I get the sense I’ve met him before.”
“Like where?” he questioned, seeming interested.
“Not sure. I could be totally full of shit.”
“Far as I know, he’s never been near the club. But I’ll have it checked out.” Cruz pulled me close, “Let’s go for a ride.” I smiled up at him, nodding my head.
Being on the back of Cruz’s bike was an exhilarating experience. I’ve always loved riding, but something about my thighs pressed against this rock hard man was making this one of the best rides ever. His smell of leather and testosterone combined with the roar of the bike was making my body pulsate, throb, and ache. Pressing my pussy as close to his ass as I could, I began slightly rubbing just to give myself a small amount of friction to go along with the rumble of the bike.
Cruz’s hand squeezed my thigh as if he knew what I was doing, before placing it back on the throttle. As he revved the bike, I got just enough friction that my body shuddered. It wasn’t an all-consuming orgasm by any means, but it felt good and briefly cured the ache.
As my hands released the clutching grip I seemed to have placed on Cruz’s abs, his body began to move as if he was chuckling. With my body very relaxed, I held on, enjoying my first ride with him.
Cruz pulled the bike into a small diner, Sam’s, just outside of Sumner. I’d missed this place while being inside. The smell of grease and fries surged into my nostrils as my stomach took notice and growled. They had the best burgers and fries, and I couldn’t wait to sink my teeth in them.
After getting off his bike, Cruz wrapped his arms around my body pulling me flush to his. “You owe me,” he whispered onto my lips.
“What?” I said; my breath barely leaving my body.
He shook his head slowly. “Getting yourself off and not letting me watch. Not. Happening. Again.” His lips crashed down on mine, and I felt lost in all that was Cruz. It amazed me how this man seemed to have some sort of spell that mesmerized my body instantly.
Pulling away, “I might let you watch next time.” I smirked patting his broad chest as I turned to the door.
It didn’t take but a minute for Cruz to be seen in the diner. Many guys coming up to him, shaking his hand and doing that man hug thing. He didn’t introduce me, which either meant he didn’t want anyone to know who I was, or I was insignificant. I was hoping it wasn’t the latter.
Instead of Cruz taking his seat across from me in the booth, he pulled himself right in beside me, pushing me all the way against the wall with his broad body. “You know you can sit on the other side,” I said, wiggling to make room.
“Then I couldn’t do this…” Cruz leaned down placing the sweetest, softest kiss on my lips causing my insides to flutter.
“What can I getcha?” I heard the waitress’s voice, but couldn’t pull myself out of the shock of the gentleness that I just witnessed. This rough man, who has shown me this hard, demanding side of him, has an unbelievably soft side too, who’d have known.
A sharp squeeze of my hand sent pain through my arm causing me to snap out of it. “What?”
Cruz chuckled, “What do you want to eat, Baby?”
Shit. Shaking my head, I smiled at the waitress, but it instantly fell. Her eyes were totally focused on Cruz sending a surge of fire throughout me. As if sensing it, Cruz’s hand came up under my chin, pulling me towards his face. My eyes locked on his just as he placed another kiss on my lips.
“Order what ya want.” He winked.
Without looking back at her, I ordered, as did Cruz, sending her away. “You don’t like her looking at me, Babe?”
I didn’t give him the satisfaction of an answer, because I didn’t fully understand it myself. “So, you were in the Marines?”
His body stiffened, “Yep.”
“You don’t like talking about it?” I asked as the waitress placed our drinks on the table, and I reached for mine.
“Nah…”
I knew better than anyone about not wanting to talk about shit. So I changed the subject. “Why’d you join Ravage?”
A smirk claimed the corner of his mouth. “I realized this is where I belong. This is my family.”
His answer was utterly diplomatic and really didn’t give me a lot to go on, but deep down I understood. The brotherhood wasn’t something that most men talked about. Even if I grew up here and knew the life, he steered away.
“Do you have a family outside of Ravage?”
“Nah, Mom died when I got out of the service. She was all I had.”
“Didn’t know your dad?” I instantly regretted the question when his voice spoke.
“He left when I was young. Loved some other woman; crushed my mom. It wasn’t pretty.”
My insides churned for this man. I couldn’t imagine Pops ever leaving me, abandoning me. He’s taught me so much throughout the years. Reaching over, I clasped his hand and squeezed as his eyes locked on mine. As I tried to release him, he held tighter, and I began to relax into him. He absently began rubbing circles with this thumb, sending shocks throughout my body with each swipe. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s who I am, but enough about me. What about you?” I didn’t know what to say. These past two years, all I did was survive. What do I say to that question? He must have sensed my apprehension. “Growing up.”
“This has been my life. Hanging out at the clubhouse, and the brothers are really all I’ve known. They’ve taught me how to be me.”
“Must have been weird growing up around all those guys.”
“No. Not actually. They were all Pops’ brothers, and they treated me very well. I always respected them, and they did me.” Not saying they didn’t try to fuck me as I got older, but I thought I’d leave that part out.
“You ever want to get away from here?”
His question caught me off guard, but I answered immediately. “No. This is my home. You wanna tell me about Mel?” I asked, really not wanting to know, but thinking I should.
“No. She’s inconsequential.” There were questions there, but I could tell the subject was closed. “You wanna tell me about your time inside?”
No. I didn’t, but I would. “Boring. Same shit different day. I kept to myself as much as possible. My only goal was to get out alive.”
“Understandable. Heard you had your own space.”
“Yeah. Pops and Diamond worked something out, and I owe them.” I did. I knew it. That’s why when they asked me to take care of a couple of things for them I didn’t balk one bit.
He didn’t respond. As I looked around the diner, eyes were focused on us. It was the same as it was when I was out with Pops and G.T. The Ravage patch held great honor and respect around here, not to mention curiosity. They all probably wanted to know everything that was Cruz’s life. The thought made me snicker because no one would ask… not that they would be told anyway.
As our food came, and we settled into small conversation, I felt happy, something I hadn’t felt in a long time.
From going to sleep on a mattress that felt like a board in prison, to being wrapped up in Cruz’s arms in a soft bed, was a huge change. I’ve had to admit his arms were beginning to be one of my favorite places to be. Prison was so stark, and Cruz was colorful and bright… life.
“You gonna tell me your real name?” I asked him, running my fingers up and down his washboard abs to chest and b
ack again.
“Cruz,” he answered lying there with is arm resting over his eyes.
“Okay, Cruz what?”
Removing his arm, he looked down at me. “Donavan Cruz, but no one calls me that except for the cops. I love to ride, so Cruz stuck.”
“Donavan, huh? I’m gonna start calling you that.”
“Bull-fucking-shit you are. It’s Cruz. That’s it. Got it?” I nodded, hiding my smile. Since I grew up in the club, I never called any of the brothers by their real name. My brother G.T. has been called that since he was a baby. No one ever uses his real name, except when I’m really pissed. I might throw it out there a couple of times to get under his skin. It’s the same as my name. No one calls me Harlow around here, even though I think it’s a pretty kick ass name. I’m always Princess.
“Got it. How about Stud? Can I call you that?” I smirked, looking up into his blue eyes that engulf me every time; my head rested on his chest.
“Babe, you can call me that whenever you damn well want.” I smiled, climbing up to him, kissing him on the lips.
Yawning, I mumbled, “I’m beat.” I curled up alongside Cruz as he absently began rubbing circles on my shoulder as I drifted off to sleep.
No… I don’t want to… it hurts. I wanted to whine, but I knew better. It wouldn’t help what was about to happen. ‘Shut the fuck up. You want this you dirty little whore.’ He pushed my stomach down onto the hard bed as my arms tried to pull myself up; he pushed harder, his fat beer belly pushing the small of my back. ‘I know you need what I’ve got. Lay there and take it… or fight. I don’t give a shit which you choose.’ Everything in me wanted to fight, wanted to put this asshole on his ass, but I knew I couldn’t do it. I knew I needed what he had for me. I had to do it for the brothers. As he tore into me, I cringed from the pain, biting down on my lip so hard I tasted blood. He was never gentle, but he always brought lube. I think it was more for him than for me. ‘You fucking little whore. Doing this for daddy, huh?’ Every time he came to me, he repeated those same fucking words. And the sad thing was they were true. My body was on fire as each time he thrust into me; it would tear me more and more… I couldn’t breathe… I was suffocating…
