Shadows (lux)

by Jennifer L. Armentrout

  His eyes snapped to hers, the green churning with a mixture of hope and panic, relief and sorrow. There was also this oddly tender look on his face that pulled at her heart, made it thump harder. “Why would you want to?”

  She bit her lip, wondering if she’d somehow insulted him. Was touching in their true form uncouth? He had jumped away from her awfully fast. “I don’t know. I just do.”

  Shock splashed across his face. “You really want to?”

  Holding her breath, she nodded.

  “It shouldn’t make your trace worse, but…” He rose to his knees anyway, and closed his eyes. A second later, he faded out. His clothes, the shape under them, everything just faded away but

  was quickly replaced by white light edged in blue.He extended one arm and fingers formed. Five of them. Just like hers. Beth’s gaze darted up and his head tilted to the side, waiting.

  His light illuminated the entire room. Warmth radiated from him. As strange as it was seeing this, he was beautiful. So beautiful there were tears in her eyes, which had nothing to do with the intensity of the light.

  With her heart in her throat, she reached out her hand. When her fingers brushed the light, a weak shock of electricity rolled up her arm, and then she felt the faint vibration. Her fingers clasped his — and it felt the same. Warm. Smooth. Strong. It was Dawson’s hand.

  It just looked different.

  Bethany inched closer, careful not to freak him out. “Can I touch more of you?”

  After a pause, he nodded.

  Then it struck her. “You can’t talk to me in this form, can you?”

  Dawson shook his head.

  “That’s sad.” But then she placed her hand where she assumed his chest was and his light pulsed. There was a distinct crackle in the room, like a socket blowing. The humming sensation rolled up her arm, reminding her of pushing a lawn mower.

  Her hand slipped down, and the light grew even more powerful. She started to smile, but then she realized she was feeling him up, and, well, that was awkward. Pulling her hand back, she hoped he didn’t notice her blush.

  Dawson lowered his arm, and the light dimmed. Like before, he faded out and took the form she was familiar with, jeans and all.

  “Hey,” he said.

  “Beautiful,” she blurted out. “You’re beautiful.”

  His eyes widened, and she felt sort of dumb. “I mean, what you are isn’t something…bad.”

  “Thank you.”

  She nodded. “Your secret is safe with me. I promise you. You don’t have anything to worry about.”

  “You’re okay, then?”

  “Everything is okay,” she whispered, still awestruck by the beauty of his true form.

  “Good.” He smiled, but it rang false as he stood, running his hand down his thighs. “You can’t imagine how thankful I am that you understand, and don’t worry, I also understand.”

  She frowned. “Understand what?”

  “That you don’t want to see me…like this anymore.” There was a pause as he flinched. “I know you probably hate me for pretending to be human and then for kissing you. It was wrong. And it probably disgusts you. After the trace fades, I’ll leave you alone. I swear. But I need to stay close to you now, just to be careful. I don’t want you to worry. The likelihood of an Arum finding you is slim.”

  “Whoa. Wait.” Bethany stood, her heart thumping in her chest again. “Dawson, why would I be disgusted or hate you?”

  He gave her a bland look.

  “What?” She shook her head.

  “I’m an alien.” He said it slowly.

  “But you’re still Dawson, right? I mean, I get that you’re what you are, but you’re still Dawson.” She paused, working up her courage to throw it all out there. “You’re still the guy I like. And if — if you still like me, then I don’t see what the big deal is.”

  He paused, and she was pretty sure he stopped breathing. And she tried not to notice or get freaked out by it, because it so wouldn’t help anything right now.

  Dawson just stared at her.

  Ah, maybe she’d read this wrong? The kissing, too? “I mean, if you still like me? I don’t know what kind of rules or—”

  He’d crossed the distance between them so quickly she hadn’t even seen him move. One second she was standing there, yapping away, and the next she was in his arms, his head buried in her hair. Strong arms trembled around her.

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and held on. A lump formed in her throat. Tears burned her eyes. It dawned on her how incredibly lonely they had to be, living among the humans, but never really being a part of them.

  “Bethany,” he murmured, inhaling deeply. “You have no idea what this…means to me.”

  Snuggling closer and breathing in his crisp scent, she held him tighter. There weren’t really any words.

  “I’m thinking,” he said, voice rough.

  “About…?”

  “You. Me. Together. Like going out together, being together.” There was a pause, and then he laughed. “Wow. That was probably the lamest attempt ever of asking you to be my girlfriend.”

  Beth’s heart sped up. Lame or not, she was seconds from swooning. “You want to be my boyfriend?” He nodded, and her breath came out in a little gasp. “Well, you kind of have to be with me now.” Lifting her head, she grinned up at him. “I know your big, bad secret.”

  Dawson laughed, and his eyes lightened. “Oh, blackmail, huh?”

  When she nodded, he bent down, pressing his head against her forehead. “Seriously though, I want this — I want you.” The earlier awkwardness was gone from his voice. He was all intent and purpose now. “More than I’ve ever wanted anything. So, yeah, I want to be with you.”

  Nothing in this world could stop her smile. “I really, really like the sound of that.”

  Bethany knew the truth, knew how much he risked, but in his arms, he was and would always be Dawson.

  Chapter 12

  The ride home was a blur to Dawson. He didn’t even remember parking the car and heading upstairs. Lying in bed, he stared at the ceiling, his thoughts racing and spilling atop one another.

  He’d flipped into his true form. Holy crap on a cracker. He actually changed in front of her. There were no words.

  Never in his life had that happened.

  But she hadn’t freaked. God, no, she’d actually accepted him. Other than UFO fanatics, Dawson didn’t expect that from any human.

  Pulling his cell out of his pocket, he sent her a quick text, asking if she was okay. Her response came back immediately. Then his phone beeped again.

  See each other tmrw?

  The grin that spread across his face probably made him look like a dumb SOB, but he didn’t care. Responding back, he told her yes and then dropped the cell on his nightstand. Not a second later, his bedroom door opened, and Dee popped her head in.

  “Hey,” she said. “Can I come in?”

  “Sure.” Dawson sat up. “What’s up?”

  Dee sat in the chair by his desk, folding her slender arms. “Daemon went after the Arum today. He was close to the diner.”

  Dawson’s chest clenched. Bethany. She may have accepted him, but damn, how could he forget about that trace? “Is Daemon okay?”

  “A little banged up, but he’ll be fine.” There was a pause and then a sigh. “He’ll always be okay. You know how he is.”

  Yeah, Daemon was a freaking machine. “Let me guess — he’s out there hunting the Arum again right now.”

  She nodded. “Were you with Bethany?”

  “I hung out at her house, met her parents.”

  “Sounds serious,” she whispered.

  Serious as an alien invasion, he thought. Crossing his ankles, he narrowed his eyes. “Are you okay?”

  Dee blinked out of the chair and appeared on the foot of the bed, her knees tucked against her chest. “I’m fine. I just miss you. Daemon’s a bore.”

  He chuckled. “Daemon is more exciting than I am.” />
  She scrunched up her nose. “Whatever. So, Bethany — it is serious, right? Meeting parents? You’ve never done that before.”

  They had a close relationship, he and Dee. Although a lot of the details about his hookups were absent, Dee knew everything about him. And he trusted her implicitly.

  “I really do like her,” he said finally, closing his eyes. “She’s amazing.”

  Dee didn’t respond immediately, and he knew what she was thinking. Bethany could be amazing, perfect even, and it wouldn’t matter. Aliens and humans didn’t mix. “Dawson—”

  “She knows.”

  He’d said it quietly, but the two words were like a nuclear bomb.

  “What?” Dee shrieked.

  Dawson winced. When he opened his eyes, she was standing straight up on the bed, eyes wide and hands shaking. He sat up. “Dee, it’s okay.”

  “How can it be okay? Humans can’t know about us! And what about the DOD and—”

  “Dee, sit and get a grip. Okay?” He waited until she settled back down. Her whole body was vibrating. It happened whenever she got excited or upset. “I didn’t tell her on purpose.”

  Her head cocked to the side. “How did you accidentally let it slip? ‘Oh, by the way, I’m an alien. Let’s kiss’?”

  Huh, she had it backward.

  “What happened?” she demanded.

  “I’m not sure you want to know the details.”

  “Did you guys have sex? Because that’s pretty much the only thing you won’t tell me, which I do appreciate, and on second thought, don’t answer that question. It was gross.”

  “No. We didn’t have sex.” He choked on his laugh. “Geez, Dee…”

  She rolled her eyes. “Then what happened?”

  Rubbing his temples, he glanced at the door. “Bethany and I were making out and something happened that’s never happened before.”

  Dee leaned back. A look of supreme disgust clouded her pretty face. “Uh, yuck if this is about any kind of premat—”

  “Oh my God, shut up and listen, okay?” He dragged a hand through his hair. “We were making out, and I lost my hold on my human form. I lit up like a freaking Christmas tree.”

  His sister’s mouth dropped open. “No shit…”

  “Yeah, and she saw me. I had to tell her, because it’s not like I could hide after that.”

  Dee blinked several times. “Wait. Rewind. You lost hold because you were kissing?”

  “Yep.”

  “Wow.” Another emotion washed away the disgust. Something he couldn’t place and probably didn’t want to. “You must really, really like her.”

  “I do.” Dawson smiled then, unable to help himself. He was such a dork.

  “I’ve never been kissed like that.”

  There went his smile. “You better not be kissed like that. And I don’t want to hear about it if you do.”

  “Hey, it’s caring and sharing time, right?”

  “No.”

  She waved her hand, dismissing him. “What did she do?”

  Dawson explained how well Bethany handled it once she got over her expected shock. Respect filled his sister’s eyes. Any Luxen could appreciate a human’s understanding of keeping this on the down low, and if he believed that Bethany would, Dee seemed to trust that.

  “Wait. Is she glowing?” She whispered the last bit, as if saying it out loud was some sort of sin.

  Dawson nodded. “A little bit.”

  “Oh, man. Daemon is going to kill you.”

  “Thanks. That helps, Dee.”

  “Sorry.” She lifted her hands. “But once he sees her, yeah, not good.”

  Dawson leaned against the headboard, running his hands down his face. Dammit, it wasn’t good. Not by a long shot. Who cared about Daemon killing him? Bethany was glowing. He’d left his proverbial mark on her.

  And that would draw an Arum right to her doorstep.

  …

  Staring at a blank stretch of canvas on Sunday, Bethany held a paintbrush in one hand and her other was busy feeling her lips — lips that had touched Dawson’s. Gosh, he’d kissed her as if he’d been starving, leaving her dizzy and breathless.

  He’d left a little while ago, just before supper. They hadn’t kissed again. Explaining that he wanted to wait until the trace faded before he attempted it, their time together had been Disney Channel — approved. But they had cuddled a lot, and that had been just as good as kissing, in her book. Just being next to him, with his arms around her, made her heart race, her nerve endings firing left and right.

  Amazingly, the entire time she’d been with him, she really hadn’t thought about what he was. Sure, now that he was gone, she couldn’t stop thinking about it.

  Dawson was an alien.

  The whole town was populated with them, apparently. It was all so…out of this world.

  Bethany smirked.

  She placed the brush back on the little table butted up against her dresser and stood. Moving to the window, she brushed the thick curtain aside. Dusk had turned the bare trees gray. Leaning her flushed forehead against the cool windowpane, she closed her eyes.

  The room — everything — felt cold without him there. It had to be the heat he threw off. Or it was just him and how he made her feel. Girly melodrama, but it was true.

  Pushing away from the window, she resisted the urge to text or call him. But she was worried for him. Tonight he was telling Daemon that she knew. If he didn’t, Daemon would apparently see this trace around her tomorrow. Better to have his brother spaz out in the privacy of their home instead of in the middle of English class.

  She seriously hoped Daemon didn’t kill Dawson. She’d grown fond of the boy.

  Trying not to obsess over it, she forced herself out of the room, away from the phone. Downstairs, her mom was in the kitchen. Big surprise there. Dad sat at the table, looking over documents while Phillip turned his mac ’n’ cheese into finger food. She steered clear of him and went into the living room.

  Her dad highlighted a portion of the document. “Look who finally came out of her room to join the living.”

  Bethany made a face. “Ha. Ha.”

  At the stove, her mom turned around, a baking sheet full of cookies in hand. “Honey, can you check on your uncle and see if he wants something to eat or drink?”

  “Sure.” She turned around and headed into the living room.

  Uncle Will was sitting on the couch stiffly, looking exhausted. The days leading up to his treatment were always the worst. From what Bethany gathered, the steroids given along with his medicine wore off fast.

  “I heard your mother,” he said before she could utter a word. His voice was weak and raspy. “If I’m thirsty, I know where the fridge is.”

  Bethany focused on the TV. One of the Godfather movies was on. “I can get you—”

  “I’m fine.” He waved his hand. It looked paper-thin and white. “Sit down. I never really get to talk to you.”

  Chatting with her uncle was the last thing she wanted to do, and she felt terrible for that. But she never knew what to say. Uncle Will liked to pretend he wasn’t knocking on death’s door, and Bethany sucked at making small talk. Avoiding his sickness was like ignoring a giant ape climbing the walls and throwing bananas.

  She sat in the recliner, tucking her legs under her as she frantically searched for something to say. Luckily, Uncle Will started off the conversation.

  “So, how long have you been seeing that boy?”

  Her mouth dropped open. Okay, so maybe she wasn’t that lucky. After Dawson had left, her parents had interrogated her about him. Again. “We’re…just friends.”

  “Is that so? I haven’t…” His words ended in a body-racking cough. Impossible as it seemed, he was even whiter. When the episode ended, he closed his eyes and cleared his throat. “I haven’t really seen him with any other girls. His…his family sticks together.”

  Oh, boy, Uncle Will had no idea. “Yeah, they seem really close.”

 
“Good kids, I guess. Never really get in trouble.” He fiddled with the patchwork quilt draped over his legs. Their outline was thin. “Can’t tell them apart, though. Which one was here?”

  It was funny to her — how no one could tell Dawson and Daemon apart. “It was Dawson.”

  He nodded. “Ah, Dawson…good choice.”

  She frowned. “Do you know him?”

  He shook his head. “Not really, but he seems the friendlier of the two…whenever I’ve seen them in town. Have you been to his house? Met his parents?”

  Her frown deepened as she stared at the screen. Of course, her uncle was pulling the protective role, but it made her uncomfortable to be questioned about Dawson. An immediate, almost irrational urge to protect him and their secret rushed to the surface.

  “They work a lot out of town, but I hear them on the phone sometimes.”

  “Hmm.” Will picked up the remote, signaling the end of the conversation. Thank God.

  Blessed silence ensued, and when she couldn’t sit there any longer, she excused herself and went back upstairs.

  And, of course, went straight to her phone.

  She wasn’t the praying type, and praying that one brother didn’t murder the other seemed wrong on a lot of levels, but she may have said a teeny prayer.

  …

  Dawson felt like he was preparing to go in front of a firing squad. And he kind of was.

  He backed away from the farmhouse, shoving his hands into his pockets. Unbeknownst to Bethany, he hadn’t really left yet. Just parked the car at his house and came back. A light flipped on in Bethany’s bedroom. He wanted to wait to see if he caught a glimpse of her, but that turned him from just keeping an eye on her into a complete stalker.

  Bethany was safe in her house right now. There were no Arum lurking in the shadows and the glow was so faint that they may not even sense it. So there was no reason for him to camp outside her house.

  And he needed to go home and talk to Daemon.

  Turning around, he moved deeper into the forest, and when he was sure no one could see his light, he switched into his true form and took off, dreading what was about to go down.

  Two minutes later, he was pulling up in his driveway, letting his light fade until he looked like any other human. Dragging his feet, he opened the front door.