“And don’t you want it anymore?”
The pain welled up again in her throat, burning hot. She forced it back and said, “I do. But I don’t think he does.”
He squeezed her hand hard. Then the light changed and the station wagon started to move again. Wallis cleared his throat and said, “I think you should call in sick and not go to work tonight.”
She sighed and started the pretense of putting it behind her. Sooner or later she would find that she had stopped acting and it was true. People did that. They survived love affairs, broken marriages, and got on with their lives. She just had to figure out how to do that. “No, I can’t do that. I just called in sick last week. Besides, it’ll be better to have something to do.”
Soon she would have all the time in the world on her hands, to think about all the things she wanted to do. Now it seemed to stretch endlessly in front of her. She winced away from the thought. She’d find a way to deal with that when it came. Maybe—maybe she was pregnant. A ferocious hunger gripped her. She was appalled at how much she wanted it.
Then a really sneaky part of her whispered, maybe he would want to know if you’re pregnant. Maybe he would want to see the baby sometimes. You could talk together on the phone. He might come and visit.
She banged her head back on the headrest in frustration. Stop it, you’re pathetic, shut up!
Wallis stared at her in alarm.
“Nothing,” she mumbled. “I’m better now.”
They arrived home, and she went up to her room to change out of the red dress into shorts and a T-shirt, and to wash her face. She took the outfit back downstairs and stuffed it into the trash. Janice was busy cooking lunch, and watched her with raised eyebrows.
“Don’t ask,” she gritted.
“I wasn’t saying anything,” the housekeeper said quickly.
Tim discovered she was home and came to buzz around her. She dealt with him somehow. Words happened, and he seemed satisfied with them. Eventually he buzzed away.
Then it was time for work. She dressed comfortably in light blue cotton trousers and blouse and left. More words happened as the nurses on duty greeted her cheerfully. Victor happened, with gilded malice, until she snarled quietly at him and he suddenly decided to keep well away from her.
It was a relief for once to sink into other people’s problems. She was able to switch herself off, to become someone else for a time, someone who was calm and concerned and capable. Someone who knew how to fix the problems she faced.
The night passed and then it was time to go home. Life was so much easier on a schedule. She collected her purse, went outside into the bright early-morning sunshine, and sagged.
She blinked around in confusion. She couldn’t remember where she’d parked. It was such a pretty day and all those damn birds were singing, and she had never felt so bereft and woebegone in all her life.
There was her car, parked right beside a black Jeep Cherokee.
That’s a coincidence, she said to herself. Somebody’s got a Jeep that looks just like Chance’s. Any number of people have Jeep Cherokees.
Her feet seemed to be glued to the pavement, however. She stared down at them, distressed.
She seemed to be positioned so that she could see the Jeep out of one corner of her eye. As she watched her feet, the driver’s door opened and somebody got out, unfolding a long, powerful, heartbreakingly familiar body.
Her head jerked up. Chance straightened, running both hands through his hair. The sunlight glinted off burnished gold. He was dressed in jeans, a black T-shirt and running shoes. From that distance he appeared to be frowning, the hard, chiseled angles of his face stark.
Incredulity, pain, gladness all surged up inside her. And no little fear. She started to shake as he strolled toward her. Why is he here? she thought. What more can he say after all the painful things we said to each other—more accusations? I’m so tired. I’m not ready for this.
She looked over her shoulder at the hospital. She looked at her car. She looked at Chance as he came to stand in front of her. There were dark shadows under his glimmering eyes.
“What a busy night I had,” she said stupidly. Her heart was hammering away like a jackrabbit running for its life.
He hesitated and, for the first time since she’d known him, appeared to be at a loss. Then, gently, he said, “You must be tired. Can I drive you home?”
The gentleness hit her harder than anything else would have. She closed her eyes tight, feeling the hot tears prick again, and just shook her head.
“Mary, please,” he whispered. “I have so many things to say to you.”
Her voice quavered badly. “I don’t want to fight again.”
“I love you. I don’t want to fight again, either,” he said huskily. “I’m sorry, precious.”
That did it. She broke, sobbed aloud, and ran toward him blindly. Strong, hard arms snatched at her; he hauled her against him, and she burrowed hungrily into his chest. He shuddered, gripping her tightly, bowing his head and shoulders around her.
“I love you,” she wailed. Words tumbled out of her in a mad, uncontrolled rush. “I love you—I’m sorry for everything—I’m sorry I hung up on the airport, but you just left, you see—I thought you n-n-never wanted to talk to me again and th-th-the operator said hello—and I really couldn’t th-th-think of anything to say to that—”
He exhaled sharply, face in her hair. “Mary. Sweet-heart. You don’t have anything to be sorry about. I shouldn’t have walked out like that. You just—you just scared the hell out of me.”
She couldn’t get close enough. She wanted to crawl inside his skin and live there. Her tears soaked into his T-shirt as she whispered, “I’ll do anything. I’ll learn how to be your wife, and—and I won’t ask any questions, and I’ll be right there waiting for you when you get back. I promise—I promise.”
He groaned, compulsively passing an unsteady hand over her hair. “Hush now. Mary, stop promising me things. I’m not going anywhere. I quit.”
She lifted her streaked face. “What?”
He cupped her chin. The icy stranger was gone. His face was stripped of barriers, vivid with passion and need. “I said I quit. I had time to cool down during the drive to the airport, and I thought about the things you said. Everything you said was true, precious. When I got that phone call yesterday, I stopped being me—the man I was coming to know and like, the man I wanted to be.”
She went light-headed from relief and a fierce burst of joy, but she put it aside, for the pain was back in his voice. She stroked his cheek, murmuring, “It’s all right. You don’t have to explain. I understand, Chance. You were dedicated for so many years—you couldn’t just set it aside.”
“No, I need to say this, Mary,” he said, rubbing his cheek against hers. He continued in a low voice, “That car ride to the airport was the longest journey I’ve ever taken. When I got there, I seemed to be seeing everything through your eyes. I couldn’t understand what I was doing there. I couldn’t remember why it mattered so much. All I could think about was how you looked when I left and how shattered I felt when you said you were having second thoughts about having a baby.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck, cradling his head. “It wasn’t fair to put so much pressure on you. You had so much on your mind. I knew that afterward.”
“But you were right. I even got to thinking about your being pregnant, and how I’d feel if I were half a world away. I couldn’t handle it if you were having the baby without me. I need to be there, to be both a partner and a father. I can’t be dedicated to both you and the job, not in the ways that I need to be.” He sighed and nuzzled her neck. “I just can’t leave you alone. Not in any way since the first time I saw you. There wasn’t any other real choice. I turned around and came home.”
She tilted her head back, closing her eyes against the brightness of the sun, while the feel of his mouth against her skin made her fingers curl with pleasure. She said dreamily, “You stole my s
oul the first time you kissed me. I thought you had lots of pickle jars.”
He pulled back and stared at her. “What?” She explained, and he started to laugh. Rocking her gently, he crooned, “What a lot of courage it took for you to even agree to see me at all.”
“Yes,” she said seriously, “I was brave. I don’t think you know how terrifying you can be, Chance.”
He smoothed her hair back, framing her face with his hands, eyes dancing. “I don’t think you know how terrifying you can be.”
Her eyes went very wide and her mouth dropped open. “Me?”
“Yes, you.” He chuckled. “You look so surprised. From the first time you told me to get out of the way, I was hooked. I kept coming back. You were such a puzzle, I couldn’t figure you out. There was no telling what was going to make you squeak and run, or what might make you reach out to me with open arms. I decided I had to kiss this delightful little enigma I had taken home just to see what it would do, and then I found us both going up in flames. God, you shook me.”
She smiled. “Were we doomed?”
“I think so.” His gaze dropped to her lips, and he grew serious. He bent and covered her mouth so reverently, she whimpered and held on to him tightly. He drew back and whispered, “You’re the best teacher I’ve ever had.”
“I know you’re mine,” she said softly, glowing up at him. “Think of everything we’ve got to learn together.”
Her red-rimmed eyes were luminous. A light breeze lifted wavy strands of her hair and blew them around her face like dandelion fluff. She was so unaware of the gentle power she had, but her transparent joy tugged at him constantly, like the moon’s command over the ocean. His entire world was encapsulated in that small, emphatic package. He would spend his life protecting and cherishing her.
The jewel-like gleam of her blue eyes reminded him. He reached into his pocket and drew out her engagement ring, still remembering what a blow it had been to find it on his kitchen counter. He stared down at it, and his throat muscles worked. “This is yours,” he said hoarsely, fumbling for her left hand to put the ring where it belonged. “Don’t ever take it off again.”
She heard past the imperative demand in his voice to the need that impelled him, and she closed her hand around the ring. “I never will,” she said quietly. “You’re home, and I am yours.”
He looked at her searchingly. Then he closed his eyes and such a look of peace came over his face, she nearly cried again. He drew a breath and said, “Come on, sugar. Let’s go.”
He slipped an arm around her waist and walked with her to the cars. She rested her head against his shoulder and said happily, “What a fine morning it is.”
He smiled. “Isn’t it,” he agreed.
She nestled against him. “Chance, I don’t want to drive.”
“You’re not going to.” He led her to the passenger side of the Jeep, opened the door and lifted her in. Then he followed, pressing her back against the seat as he kissed her hard. She moaned, her lips parting and he plunged into the delicate, moist crevice of her mouth, ravenously drinking from her.
She twisted under his heavy weight, straining to get closer as she sank her hands into the hair at the back of his head. Then she shivered and clung to him, because the incredulity had not quite left her after so much pain, and he pulled back to enfold her tenderly.
“I want to do everything we planned to do yesterday,” he said gruffly. “But you need breakfast and bed. Are you up to facing your grandfather and Tim?”
She nodded. Poor Grampa, he deserves to hear how things worked out after I worried him so badly yesterday. “I want to.” Then her forehead wrinkled as she plucked at his shirt. “Did you sleep much last night?”
“No,” he murmured.
She put her face in his neck and inhaled his scent. “Are you very tired, too?”
His voice roughened. “Most definitely too tired to do anything without you.” He caressed her slender thighs.
She leaned her hot forehead against his collarbone. His pulse had accelerated, and he was breathing deeply. “What are we going to say to them?” she sighed, so hungry for him she couldn’t think straight.
“We’ll tell them we’re engaged, you’ll go to your room to pack an overnight bag, and we’ll go back to my place. Quickly,” he added with a tight grin.
The predator was back, sleek and poised to pounce. It looked at her from the richness of his unblinking eyes and said, Soon.
But he, too, had been hurt recently, and there was a lingering hint of question.
Soon, she promised, and for the first time she welcomed the predator, unafraid. He saw how whole-heartedly she meant it, and the question faded, leaving him exultant.
The trip home was a heated prelude. Chance took her hand as they walked toward the house, and she clasped it between both of hers. She couldn’t stop touching him, and she stroked his long fingers, remembering the intensity of the pleasure he’d given her. She could tell by the darkened flush along his cheekbones and the glitter in his eyes that he was remembering, too.
She took a long breath. First things first. Letting go of his hand, she danced up the porch steps while he purred up behind her. She opened the front door and sang out, “Hi, everybody, I’m home!”
There was one moment when the scene of the front hall and staircase was serenely quiet. Then it seemed the whole world descended on them.
Wallis yanked open the study door, caught sight of Chance, and his face purpled. Cassie shot out of the library, Tim on her heels.
Cassie?
Mary stopped dead and Chance bumped into her. His hands went around her waist quickly to keep her from falling.
Wallis strode toward them, bellowing, “You have a hell of a lot of nerve coming here after treating my baby girl like that!”
“Sir,” Chance said firmly.
Cassie was dressed in a gray sweat suit, red hair back in a ponytail. Her eyes were blazing. She stalked down the hall, one fist clenched, and hissed, “This time I’m really gonna kill you, Chance.”
Mary ogled her in shock, shrinking back instinctively. Chance’s arms came around her, and he said soothingly in her ear, “It’s all right. Everything’s under control.”
Wallis was still shouting. Cassie looked at her, and her face softened. “Hi, Mary,” she crooned gently. “Would you get out of my way, please?”
Mary pushed back against Chance harder and shook her head. He was starting to shake with laughter.
Tim’s head popped up from behind Cassie’s shoulder, eyes shining with excitement, and he waved. “You were having such a bad day yesterday, so I naturally thought of calling Cassie to see if we could help. She came over right away,” he said in an awed voice. “Hi, Mary. Hi, Chance.”
“Hi, Tim,” Chance said cheerfully.
“Er—just a minute,” said Mary.
“…and I’ll give you one final chance to unhand my granddaughter!” Wallis cried.
“…just answer me this, you big idiot!” Cassie snarled. “Why the hell did you drag me all over town to buy the love of your life a ring if you were gonna walk out on her the next day!”
“Excuse me, everybody,” Mary said.
“I want an explanation, and I want it now!” Wallis yelled.
Mary felt Chance inhale deeply, and his body stiffened. “QUIET!” he roared over her head. The deep, powerful shout echoed off the walls like a gunshot.
Silence. Wallis and Cassie stared at him with deep offense, while Tim, big-eyed, stood very straight.
Chance said more quietly, “Mary and I had a bad time. It’s over now. I’m retiring, and we’re getting married in a week and a half.”
They all looked at her. She held up her left hand, waggled her engagement ring at them and beamed.
After a long pause, Wallis said, “Oh.”
The storm clouds left Cassie’s face and she threw her arms around them both in an exuberant embrace. “Yes! I knew you wouldn’t be that stupid,” she assured her brother.
“But what’re you going to do with yourself now?”
He shrugged. “Schubert offered me a permanent position at the university, which I may end up taking after Mary and I talk about it. I’ve got options. We’ll see.”
Tim was hanging back quietly. Mashed as she was between Chance and Cassie, Mary didn’t see him, but Chance did. Keeping one arm around Mary, he held out the other to her brother. “Congratulate us, son?”
Mary put an arm around Cassie’s neck as she turned to look. She saw Tim’s face, vulnerable and looking very young, and Chance’s warm, reassuring smile. Then Tim shot across the hall and was pulled into the general huddle. “I’m glad,” he whispered to Mary.
“Me, too,” she whispered back and kissed him.
Wallis crossed his arms and glared at the four. “I guess I’d better go open a bottle of champagne or something,” he growled, and he turned to stump toward the kitchen.
Cassie laughed out loud. “Come on, Tim,” she said. “Let’s leave these lovebirds and go help Grampa.”
“Okay,” he sighed, and he trailed away behind her.
Chance turned Mary around to face him, remnants of laughter still in his eyes. He looked young, carefree. As she spread her hands across his chest, he bent down to kiss her deeply. Passion curled tight inside her, and she leaned against him with a shaken groan.
“I love you,” he said fiercely.
Her heart leapt. “I love you,” she whispered in reply. “We aren’t going to get away as quickly as we hoped, are we?”
“No.” He lifted her hair away from the nape of her neck and cradled her head. “But it doesn’t matter, precious. Now we have all the time in the world.”
He was right, they did.
She rested against him and was content.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Perfect Chance Page 15
