by Jill Cooper
“Molly,” my voice cracks. “Don’t give up. I’m going to get us out of here. I promise.” My words sound hollow. I’m not sure I even believe them. No matter what I do, where I go, I always seem to end up back here, one way or another.
I hate the tears that fill Molly’s eyes. “I just want to go home. Please, Lara, take me home.”
Home. One day here and already, the idea of home seems so farfetched. So distant.
“Where are we?” I whisper. “Do you know?”
“Nowhere.” Molly rolls over, ignoring me again, but her body still rocks back and forth. “We’re nowhere.” She sobs and I shush her as outside I hear the rush of footsteps. The door swings open. I direct my gaze upward again and the lights of the ceiling blind me.
Cameron smiles down at me; there’s a syringe in his hand. “Time to send you back where you came from.”
I grip the restraints on my wrists and look away from him. “Do whatever you want to me, but leave Molly alone. Leave…”
A pinch in the back of my neck interrupts my thought process. My eyes close and I hear the sweet sound of a lullaby. It must be a figment of my imagination. Hot breath blows against my ear and Cameron speaks to me. “I haven’t finished taking everyone you love away from you yet. By the time I’m done, you’ll wish you never got out of the cage in the first place.”
Chapter Twenty
With a scream, I open my eyes. I’m back, sitting in my room, still holding the newspaper clipping I had before my trip through time started. With bittersweet relief, I gaze at my Dad’s obituary.
I was back and part of me was afraid to try again, but I had to. I didn’t have much of a choice, did I? I needed to find a way to be ahead of this thing, one way or another and I couldn’t accept this version of the timeline as my home. It wasn’t home.
Home is where Dad is. I couldn’t accept that he was dead. Throwing a quick glance at my watch shows I still have time. With a deep breath, I close my eyes and feel a whistle of wind blow by my hair. I can smell the trash and rotten onions of the dumpster, where Dad’s body will be found.
And then, a piercing scream echoes from Mom’s hallway and it pulls me back before I manage to complete the time jump. “She’s just sleeping! You can’t just barge in here.” It’s not Mom’s voice, it's Jax’s.
Keep everyone out, my own words echo in my ears.
I leap to my feet and kick my duffle bag under the bed. My door opens wide as Cameron comes in fast with two police officers charging behind him. “There she is.” He points at me. “She’s attempting to change the past, gentlemen. I want her arrested. Immediately.”
They rush towards me and my vision doesn’t waiver from Cameron. “I thought you wanted time travel laws changed, Cameron. I thought this is what you wanted.”
He doesn’t say anything as my hands are pinned behind my back. I’m handcuffed and dragged through my childhood home. Mom and Jax put their jackets on over their pajamas and follow us out.
“I’ll go with her,” Jax says. “You stay with Molly.”
I’m led down the stairs and Jax doesn’t leave my side. I gaze up at Mom gripping the stair railing tightly, and behind her, Molly creeps out to the side. Her eyes are haunted, scared, and a fresh trail of blood leaks from her nose.
“We’re nowhere,” Molly whispers. “Nowhere.”
Nowhere. Somehow, Molly keeps the memories of the altered timelines. Somehow, Cameron isn’t just messing with me. He’s messing with her too.
****
At the police station, I’m thrown into a holding room and it feels as if I’ve been left there for hours. I pace the floor and when that gets boring, I sit in the metal chair. They’re letting me stew in my own juices, and boy am I.
I need this to be over and done with.
When the door unlocks, I tense up. I’m not sure who I am expecting to see, but I relax when it’s Jax. The police officer glares at me before he closes the door, but I don’t care. I rush into Jax’s arms and he strokes my hair back.
“How?”
“Someone owed me a favor,” Jax smiles. “You want to tell me what’s going on, Lara? Really going on?”
“I’m not sure what you—.”
“Lara,” Jax’s eyes are leveled at me. “Marcus was arrested at the TTPA for tampering with the equipment. Cameron is launching allegations that Donovan was involved too, so if you want me to help you with whatever is going on—.”
I sigh and squeeze my eyes tightly. It was all for nothing? Now everything I had worked for so hard was on the verge of being destroyed.
“It won’t make sense to you, Jax.”
His lip squeezes tight. “Try me.”
“Okay,” I say and I do. I tell him everything from Rex being Cameron to Dad suddenly being dead. The deeper I pull Jax into the rabbit hole, the paler he gets. Eventually, he sits down and holds his face in his hand.
“I’m not crazy. I know how it sounds.”
Jax shakes his head and when he looks up at me, I see the dread on his face. The fear in his eyes. “I thought this was long over, Lara. I thought our lives could finally just go on.”
So did I, but I stay quiet and only chew on my lip.
“What you’re saying is crazy, but,” he pauses to give me another level stare, “a lot of it lines up with what Molly’s been saying. I just thought she was playing.” Jax shrugs. “Make believe.”
“What has she been saying?”
“Since we got home from the banquet, she’s been upset. The babysitter said she woke up screaming. Your mother tried to calm Molly down, but she just kept shouting about things not being right. Something was skewed in the timeline.” Jax laughs and it's bitter. “It scared your mother and I. A lot of the words she used, well they were words you use. We just thought it was a dream. She kept saying we weren’t supposed to be together. Your mom and me. That John, your dad—.”
Slowly I nod because I know the rest.
“So it’s all true? Someone changed the past? Your mom and I?”
“I’m sorry.” I choke out the words at the look of grief on his face. “Jax, if I could keep you and Mom together forever, I would. I…love you.” I gaze down at my hand and laugh for some unknown reason, but the pain in my heart has been stretched further.
Jax squeezes my hand. “If someone went back in time and killed John, set it up to look like suicide, I owe it to him to…help you. Fix things.”
He was a better man than he gave himself credit for. A better man than Mom, in my timeline, gave him credit for. “Thank you,” I whisper.
“But what of Molly? How does she know these things? If she isn’t traveling in time with you, how can she know?”
“I don’t know.” A simple answer that terrifies me. “But we’re going to have to find out. It just might not be here.”
“What do we do? How do I help you?”
I gaze around. “I need five minutes. Five minutes alone in here with no one watching. No one coming in. If I can get back into the past….”
Jax nods. “If they catch on, we’ll both be in a lot of trouble, Lara.”
“But it won’t matter. If I get back there and change things, none of this would have happened. Everything will revert back to where it’s supposed to be.”
“I’ll never remember this conversation. The last few years with your mom,” Jax’s voice sounds numb.
“If there was another way,” I shake my head because there isn’t.
Jax stands and straightens out his suit jacket. He reaches down and strokes the top of my head. “Then let’s get started. And pray that whatever happened here, for Molly, it’s just an anomaly. Something that is fixed when you change the past.”
No one prays harder for that than I. With Jax gone, I sit calmly, with my hands on the tabletop. I gaze down and instantly my mind clicks. It’s getting easier to fall into the pattern I need to travel through time. Thinking of my father, I feel myself being pulled away. I can see his apartment and in my hand, the shape of
a wine glass takes shape.
The door of the interrogation room rattles and the police burst in and they pull their guns on me. “Harness her!”
I raise my hand and they instantly freeze. My ability to stop, rewind, and speed through time is back. It’s never felt stronger. An instant later, the police station falls away block by block. I’m standing in Dad’s apartment and he is bent over, blowing candles out on his birthday cake.
Donovan has his arm around my shoulders and he’s smiling. Mom is standing over on the other side of the table, her hands frozen in mid-clap. Young Molly is only ten-years-old, dressed in a pretty party dress. Her mouth is open as if she had been singing Happy Birthday and then she does something I least expect. She blinks.
Blinks while time is still frozen. Blinks while everything around us is still.
I take a deep breath and her eyes shift. They gaze at me a moment before everything around us comes back to life. Dad blows out his candles, Mom claps, and Donovan squeezes me tighter, all the while, my eyes are trained on my baby sister.
She gazes around and when her eyes fall to my dad, she lets out a deep breath. A relaxing deep breath, as if she didn’t expect to see him there.
“Mike!” Mom turns around and her loud voice breaks through my concentration. “Stop stuffing those grapes in your mouth and come over here and say happy birthday!” She runs off to get my half-brother and my eyes lock with Molly.
“Nice party.”
Molly nods. “Umm-hmm.” She says as if she doesn’t have a care in the world. Like something isn’t the matter.
Did I imagine it? I couldn’t have, could I?
“You okay?” Donovan asks.
I’m relieved by the way he looks at me. With love, complete trust, and respect. “Oh yeah,” I tug on his shirt and pull him in close for a hug. Part of me feels bittersweet about the embrace we share, knowing what is coming. “Everything is perfect.”
Over his shoulder, I watch Dad slicing the cake and I smile. I have one week to watch and wait. One week to make sure everything transpires just the way it should.
****
After the party begins to wrap up, I help Dad wash the plates, while Donovan hangs in the living room and catches the football game. Dad washes and I dry. He smirks at me from across the table as we clear it. “You sure you’d rather be in here with me than out there with Don?”
“I’m right where I want to be. How about you? You happy?” I study his face and watch him carefully.
Dad scowls. “Of course I’m happy. I’m here with you. Your mom. Having cake with loads of frosting. What’s not to be happy about?”
He knows just what to say to make me feel better. He gives me a squeeze and kisses the top of my head. “Now, you head out. Leave your old man and go have some fun.”
I nod. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Dad wipes his hand on a green towel. “We have a date I don’t know about?”
“You’re going to be seeing a lot of me, but don’t worry. I’ll make sure we have lots of fun. When you’re not at work, that is.”
“What about school?” Dad asks and I freeze in my tracks.
School. In my future, I’m about to graduate and marry Donovan but here…here I’m just a college freshman and if I mess this up, I might not be ready to graduate at all.
Chapter Twenty-One
Donovan drives us home in his sedan. The days of limos and drivers haven’t arrived yet, which means I have time to fix things. I can’t keep my eyes off him. He’s relaxed, in charge, and talks the whole way home. I love the way his lips turn up when he smiles and how he laughs at his own jokes.
That’s the Donovan I remember, but he’s also the Donovan I just left. The one who lost all our money and was sent into a downward spiral. He made a few wrong choices, but he had no idea where it’d lead us. No idea.
Our apartment is small but luxurious. It’s definitely nicer than the place I grew up in. It was not the penthouse suite, but it has everything a person could hope for. Brand new appliances, a gorgeous gray sofa, and most importantly, my loving boyfriend making popcorn in the kitchen.
The living room is covered in photos of us and my family—plus a few shots of Donovan’s Dad. Every picture and every memory Donovan had of Patricia, his mom, had been scrubbed away. In the slick kitchen, Donovan clinks some bottles together as he pulls them from the fridge and I take that moment to slip into the bedroom.
I sit on the bed, which is covered by a gray, satin comforter. I remember the nights in this bed; the things Donovan and I had done. How could that not be enough for him? How could I have made him think it wasn’t?
Had I ever come straight out and told Donovan how happy I was here? How happy I was with him?
I slide my phone open and dial a number I know by heart, though it isn’t in my speed dial. It’s as if I had been trying to keep her separate from everything I really am. What a mistake that had been.
“Lara?” Delilah’s voice rings out. “Well, what a pleasant surprise this is!”
“Hi, Delilah.” My soul cracks as I say the words, but I smile. “Can we have breakfast tomorrow? There’s something we need to talk about.”
“Well, of course. You know how much I love seeing you. It’s been awhile, hasn’t it? I have a meeting at the TTPA at nine, I’m afraid, but—.”
“Then I’ll meet you at eight. That little place by your apartment? Don’t say no, Delilah. It’s important.”
“Somewhat important? Or that kind of important?”
She might as well have said it aloud. The time travel kind of important. “That kind of important.”
Delilah sighs. “Then I’m going to have to order a mimosa.”
****
After my phone call with Delilah, I nestle on the sofa with Donovan in front of the big screen television. My shoes are kicked off, my legs curled beneath me and our hands meet in the big bowl of buttery popcorn. Our fingers stroke each other’s and the weight of the world keeps me from even noticing the movie flickering in front of us.
I’m back three years in the past, but I have to set the groundwork for the future. Delilah must be warned. Dad has to be saved and Donovan…Donovan can’t accept Cameron’s bribe, but if I tell him what happens in the future, I’m afraid I’ll just make matters worse. I can’t tell him something he’s not ready to hear.
“You okay? You seem a million miles away.”
Donovan’s ability to understand me, to get me, never fails to amaze me. “I’m just enjoying the movie. I’m okay.” To prove it, I rest my head on his shoulder and Donovan snuggles in close. He kisses the top of my head and I close my eyes in bliss and let out a deep, long sigh. This is where I belong.
This is home.
“You ever think about the future? Where we’ll be in a few years.” I gaze up at him when I ask.
“Together, that much is given.” Donovan slides down a bit on the sofa to get comfortable and I snuggle against his chest. “I’d like to stay in Boston, but maybe something bigger. Stay in business with my dad. Investments and trading. I’m learning a lot under him.”
“I know. I’m proud of you, Donovan.” I say it slowly and I let my words really sink in. “When everything with your mom hit the fan, you could’ve let it destroy you, but you didn’t. Now look where we are. We’re happy and have this great place; nothing is ever going to mess that up.”
He watches me and the skin around his eyes crinkles. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I just wasn’t sure if I ever made it clear, how much I love you, that’s all.” I squeeze him closer. “That you’re enough for me. Together, we can do anything. I don’t want you to think I need a fancy place to live or a big wedding. I’d be happy living here. Sharing containers of Chinese food.”
Donovan’s wide-eyed expression makes me laugh.
“What? Did you think I wasn’t happy?”
“You said wedding,” Donovan says with a grin and flashes his dimples at me. “You w
ant to get married? Are you proposing to me, Montgomery?”
We weren’t yet engaged. I’d forgotten about that. Donovan didn’t propose to me until after he took the inside trading information from Cameron. Until after he made his fortune in the stock market. “Yeah,” I say and a smile spreads across my face. “I guess I am proposing to you, but I didn’t buy you a ring.”
“I don’t need a ring,” Donovan whispers with a trace of laughter, “all I need is you.”
I can’t control my joy as he leans in to kiss me. “Ditto.”
Donovan doesn’t know what I do.
He doesn’t know that in a month’s time he’ll lose everything he has and we’ll be on the brink of losing our apartment. Our lives together. Rather than come clean, he takes the desperate route of a broken man.
I have one week to show him he doesn’t need to do all that. One week to prove to him love can be enough. I just hope it’s long enough.
I’m a time traveler, but I feel as if I’m running out of time.
****
We never finished the movie. Instead, we move to the bedroom where we do everything but sleep. By the time morning shines through the open window, I’ve caught a few zzz’s, but I’m groggy as Donovan kisses my hand. When I gaze at my long fingers, I notice he’d tied a purple string around my ring finger.
It makes me smile.
“Silly?” Donovan asks.
I shake my head. “Perfect. Never replace it with anything else, okay?”
“I’m sure I’ll replace it someday. You need something shiny on your finger.”
“Never replace it. I don’t need diamonds or gold, Don.” I lean my head against his chest and hold my hand in the air so I can admire it.
Donovan’s gaze flicks back and forth between my eyes. I figure he must be trying to study me. Figure me out. “When did you turn into such a romantic, Montgomery?”
