Still, it was more than that. It was the realization that when Olivia died, the child had no one. And admittedly, there had been more than a few moments when Paige had cursed her friend for naming her the baby’s guardian, moments when she’d fervently wished Olivia had chosen someone—anyone—else.
But now things were different. They had a routine, and a connection. When Emma cried, Paige instinctively knew whether she was wet or hungry or tired or just wanted to be held. And she’d found that nothing comforted her so much as offering comfort to the baby she’d grown to love as if she were her own.
“If he’d shown up five months ago—heck, maybe even five weeks ago—I might have jumped at the opportunity to turn Emma over to him. But now…I can’t imagine my life without her.”
“You’re the expert on custody matters,” Ashley reminded her. “So all I’ll say is, whatever you need, we’re here for you.”
“Absolutely,” Megan agreed.
Paige knew it was true, and their unwavering support meant the world to her. “Thanks. At this point, I don’t know what I need, what he plans to do. I got the impression that he discovered the letter from Olivia when he got home from an overseas tour, tore off to confront her, found out she’d been killed and that I had custody of the baby, and raced out here without really thinking about what he planned to do when he finally came face-to-face with the child that he believes is his own.”
“Poor man,” Ashley murmured sympathetically. Then her gaze flew to Paige’s. “Not that I’m taking his side. Of course not. I just can’t help thinking that the news must have thrown him for a loop.”
“You mean like when Paige found out she’d been named Emma’s legal guardian?” Megan asked her sister.
Ashley nodded. “But at least Paige knew the baby existed. This guy didn’t even know he’d had a child.”
“If she’s even his baby,” Paige felt compelled to interject.
“You don’t think he is Emma’s father?”
“I don’t know what to think, why Olivia never told anyone about him. Any time I tried to get information about her child’s father, she stonewalled me. And yet, if I believe him, if I believe she wrote the letter he showed me, then she had a change of heart and decided to tell him about the child. She wanted him to be a part of her daughter’s life.”
“What do you want?” Ashley asked gently.
“I want him to have a change of heart—to have woken up this morning and, in the light of day, realize that he’s not ready to take on the responsibility of being a father and just disappear as unexpectedly as he appeared.”
But she knew it wasn’t going to happen.
A fact that was confirmed when Zach’s SUV pulled into the driveway while she was saying goodbye to Ashley and Maddie a few minutes later.
Ashley paused on the step, obviously wanting to hang around and meet him. But Maddie tugged on her hand, a silent reminder that they both had to get to school, and with a last wave, she was gone.
Unfortunately, Megan was still inside. But Paige had invited Zach to come by, so she gestured for him to follow her into the house.
As she was introducing Zach and Megan, she heard the soft slap of the baby’s hands on the ceramic tile floor as she crawled toward the sound of familiar voices. When she rounded the corner and spotted Paige, those big blue eyes lit up and her mouth curved in a wide smile.
Beside her, she heard Zach’s breath catch.
Emma heard it, too, because she looked over at him, then actually scooted back a step. And the little girl, whose exposure to the male species had been limited and who had certainly never met anyone as big and imposing as the man in front of her now, started to cry.
Paige wanted to scoop the child into her arms, to hold her and hug her and promise her that the big scary man would go away and everything was going to be okay. But it was a promise she knew she wouldn’t be able to keep, so she stood motionless, helpless, while Zach squatted beside the teary child.
He murmured softly to her, so softly that Paige couldn’t hear the words that were said. But despite the soothing tone, Emma turned away, tears tracking down her cheeks as she crawled over to where Paige was standing. Grabbing hold of her pant leg, she pulled herself up and hung on, peeking at the stranger from behind the shelter of Paige’s leg.
Zach stood, too, and sighed wearily.
“She’s a little wary of strangers,” Paige told him.
She expected he would again claim that he was her father, but he seemed to understand that even if that was true, he was also a stranger.
“But she warms up quickly,” Megan interjected, as if to reassure Zach. Then she ruffled Emma’s soft curls. “Don’t you, Em?”
The little girl looked up at her and smiled shyly. Then, apparently bored with the adult conversation, she dropped down to the floor again and crawled back to the living room.
“I want to get the paternity test done as soon as possible,” Zach told Paige.
“All right,” she agreed, biting back a more elaborate retort that would have let him know in clear terms that what she wanted was for him to descend into the fiery underworld.
Megan sent her a look that warned her cousin that she knew what evil thoughts were lurking in her mind, then she turned to Zach and asked, “What are you going to do in the meantime?”
“I had originally planned to fly out to California tomorrow, but finding out about Emma changed those plans.”
“Having the responsibility of a child changes everything,” Paige felt compelled to point out.
He nodded. “That’s why I’ve decided to stay in Pinehurst until we’ve established Emma’s paternity.”
He planned to stay in Pinehurst?
Oh, this is not good, Paige thought.
At the same time, Megan said, “That’s great.”
Paige frowned at her, but her cousin refused to meet her gaze.
“Because caring for Emma has been a big responsibility for Paige to tackle on her own,” Megan continued.
“I’ll gladly help in any way that I can,” Zach said.
Paige didn’t need or want his help and the steely-eyed glare she sent in his direction told him so. But he wasn’t looking at her but at Megan, who rewarded his evident compliance with a smile.
“And it would probably help ease Emma’s shyness if she got used to seeing you around,” she continued. “She’s in the living room playing, if you wanted to hang out in there.”
“Do you mind?” he asked Paige, as if her opinion actually mattered.
She forced a smile through gritted teeth. “No. Go ahead.”
Paige waited until Zach had left the room to turn to her cousin. “I can’t believe you just did that.”
“What I just did was ensure that Zach Crawford will see firsthand how good you are with Emma, how much she’s bonded with you, and realize how difficult it would be for her if he tries to take her away,” Megan said.
“So I’m supposed to believe that you did this for me?”
“You know that Ashley and I love that baby, too. Maybe not the way you do, but none of us want to see you lose her.”
“Yet you just invited the enemy to essentially set up camp here.”
“It’s not as if you could force him to leave town before he’s ready, and this paves the way for a cooperative, rather than an adversarial, relationship,” Megan said reasonably.
“If he is Emma’s father, he could take her away from me, so forgive me for not wanting to cooperate with him.”
Megan sighed. “You are one of the most rational people I know, but you’re being completely irrational about this.”
Paige knew it was true, but she wasn’t quite sure how to explain it.
“Something about him just sets off my radar,” she finally admitted.
Her cousin’s eyebrows lifted. “Your I-don’t-trust-this-guy radar? Or your I-don’t-trust-myself-around-this-guy radar?”
Paige frowned.
“Because I may be happily married
and eleven months pregnant—” she glanced down at her enormous belly “—but even I couldn’t miss the fact that Zach Crawford is seriously hot.”
“He’s a lieutenant colonel in the United States Air Force.”
“Which, for a lot of women, would only further enhance his appeal. Yummy good looks, perfectly sculpted body, strong moral character and dedication to his country.”
“None of which qualifies him to assume the care of a fourteen-month-old baby, even if she is his daughter.”
Megan nodded slowly. “Now I get it.”
“What do you get?” Paige asked warily.
“That this isn’t about Zach at all.”
“It’s about Emma.”
“Maybe,” her cousin acknowledged. “And maybe it’s about the fact that Colonel Phillip Wilder was a respected military leader but a complete screwup as a father.”
“It’s about Emma,” Paige insisted.
And although there was no disputing that Paige was genuinely concerned about the child’s well-being, it was obvious to both of them that there were more issues to be dealt with than the custody of one little girl.
Zach stayed through the morning, just hanging around while Emma played. Sometimes Emma approached Paige, wanting her help with some task or another, and although she cast frequent curious glances in Zach’s direction, the little girl kept a careful distance between herself and the stranger.
To his credit, Zach didn’t push to engage her in play or conversation and he didn’t hover. He just stayed in the background, silently observing. Paige knew it was ridiculous, but she couldn’t help feeling that her every word and her every action were being monitored by the man who claimed to be the little girl’s father.
When it was time for Emma’s lunch, she felt compelled to offer to feed him, too. And he responded with such genuine appreciation, she felt guilty for making the offer so begrudgingly.
They munched on sandwiches while Emma tackled cooked noodles and vegetables with her six teeth.
“She’ll go down for a nap after lunch,” Paige told him, as she cleared their plates away. Hint, hint.
“I guess that’s my cue to head out,” he said.
“I try to use the time when she’s asleep to catch up on e-mail and other business matters.”
“I thought you were on vacation.”
She shook her head. “I’m actually on a leave of absence right now.”
“Why?”
“Because I didn’t realize the firm frowned upon an attorney giving closing arguments in a trial with a baby strapped to her chest in a Snugli.” Not so long ago, she would have been horrified by the thought of putting a baby carrier on over one of her favorite Armani jackets, but almost six months with Emma had changed her perspective—and her priorities.
His lips curved. “Did you really?”
“I didn’t have a choice,” she explained. “The day before, when I picked Emma up from Annabelle’s—that’s her sitter—she warned me that one of the other kids she looks after had been throwing up. So I kept an eye on Emma for any signs of lethargy or fever, but she was fine. Unfortunately, though, Annabelle caught the bug and she called at six o’clock the next morning to tell me that she wouldn’t be able to take Emma that day.”
“This is six o’clock the same morning that you’re due in court?”
Paige nodded. “And I didn’t have a backup plan. Nothing like this had ever happened before. And because no one was available to watch Emma while I went to court, I took her with me.”
“What did the judge think of that?”
“Both the judge and opposing counsel were understanding, and Emma slept through the whole process. Which, by the way, ended with my client maintaining custody of her four kids and her degenerate ex-husband’s access being restricted and subject to supervision.”
“So what was the problem?” Zach wondered.
“The problem came when Emma let it be known that she wasn’t quite so happy at the office,” Paige told him. “And it wasn’t as if I intended to move her playpen beside my desk—I just went in to ask Rebecca to reschedule my appointments and to pick up some files so that I could work at home. But Carson Wainwright was meeting with the CEO of one of our biggest clients, who happens to be the doting grandfather of seven grandkids and who couldn’t help but be drawn away from their meeting in the conference room by the sound of Emma’s crying.”
“And that didn’t go over well with Mr. Wainwright,” he guessed.
“Right again,” Paige agreed. “Of course, he didn’t say anything at the time, but while the CEO was busy cooing over the baby, he was shooting daggers at me across the room. And when Emma was back at Annabelle’s the next morning and I returned to my office, I was summoned into a meeting with all three of the senior partners, who suggested that I needed to rethink my priorities if I expected to have a future at Wainwright, Witmer & Wynne.”
“They threatened to fire you?” Zach sounded as stunned as she had been.
“I don’t think it will come to that,” Paige admitted. “Owen Wynne immediately jumped up, urging everyone not to be too hasty, and suggested that I should take some time to think things through.
“So that’s where I am—trying to figure out whether I can successfully juggle my professional obligations and personal responsibilities—or if I want to.”
“You mean you might leave Wainwright, Winter and…Whatever?”
Her lips curved, just a little. “Wainwright, Witmer and Wynne. And I haven’t made any final decisions yet.”
She lifted a sleepy Emma out of her high chair. He stood up.
“Speaking of decisions, you never said when or where we should have the paternity testing done.”
Emma rubbed her face against Paige’s shoulder.
“I’ve used PDA Labs before,” she told him.
At the lift of his brows, she felt her cheeks flush. “I’m an attorney,” she reminded him. “I’ve had to deal with this issue for several of my clients.”
“So how does it work?”
“We find a doctor to conduct the test, then contact the lab to have them courier a kit to the doctor. Then it’s just a swab of the inside of Emma’s cheek and yours and waiting for the results.”
“Do you know any doctors in town?”
“Cameron Turcotte, my cousin Ashley’s husband, is a doctor.”
He nodded. “How soon can we get it done?”
“I’ll call him and the lab this afternoon.”
He must have sensed her reluctance, because he said, “I would think you’d be as anxious as I am to have the matter of Emma’s paternity settled once and for all.”
Anxious didn’t begin to describe what she was feeling. Her emotions were too intense and conflicted to be so simply categorized.
She felt helpless and scared, but she was also determined. Even if Zach was Emma’s father, Paige didn’t intend to quietly slip out of the little girl’s life. No, she would make sure that any decisions made about the future were made not on the basis of DNA but considering what was best for Emma.
“Except that establishing paternity may only be the beginning,” she warned.
Chapter Four
Zach thought about Paige’s words as he drove back to his room at Hadfield House.
She was right, of course. Confirming Emma’s paternity was only a first step, but neither one of them could really move forward with their plans until that first step had been taken.
Of course, at this point, he really didn’t know what his plans would be, how he could fit a child into his life, but he knew that he would find a way. Because, while Paige insisted that a paternity test was needed to prove that he was Emma’s father, he’d agreed solely to appease her. He didn’t need a cheek swab to confirm what he already knew—Olivia’s little girl was his daughter. And he had no intention of walking away from the child or the responsibilities that being a father entailed.
Maybe he and Olivia hadn’t known everything about one another, but
she had to have known that. Although they’d only been dating for a few weeks, they’d spent a lot of time together during that period.
When he’d first read her letter, and her claim that he’d fathered a child, his first instinct had been to deny the possibility. He had never been careless about birth control and he certainly hadn’t been with Olivia. But even as he’d recalled that fact to reassure himself, he’d heard the echo of his father’s voice in the back of his mind: the only birth control that is one-hundred-percent effective is abstinence. If you’re going to play, be prepared to pay.
He’d heard that same warning too many times to count during his teenage years and, although he hadn’t always abstained, he’d always been careful.
Obviously not careful enough.
Okay, so finding out about Emma had definitely been a surprise, but he would never say that she was an accident or a mistake. He believed that everything that happened in life happened for a reason, even if the reason wasn’t readily apparent. He certainly couldn’t fathom any noble purpose for the accident that had not only ended Olivia’s life tragically and prematurely but had also left an innocent child without her mother.
But even after her death, Olivia had ensured that her daughter was taken care of, and although he might wonder why she’d chosen to name Paige Wilder as Emma’s legal guardian, he couldn’t fault her choice. Because what he’d seen in the young attorney’s interactions with the child was a woman who was both attentive and affectionate, who anticipated and responded to the child’s every need. And a woman who had no intention of accepting that he was Emma’s father until he’d jumped through all kinds of hoops.
Well, he would show her that he was more than ready to jump through those hoops and take responsibility for his child. And if he had to spend time in Paige’s company in the process, well, he didn’t think that was going to be much of a hardship.
Zach came back the next morning, and the morning after that. He wasn’t obtrusive and he didn’t get in her way, but Paige was all too aware of his presence, of his eyes following her every move, of her own response to him.
The Baby Surprise Page 4
