“You’re close, then?”
“More so lately, since Reid met his wife. He’s changed. He’s the first one to tell you she changed him.”
“Softened him?”
“Yes. Big time. A lion that can rip your throat out and then purr like a kitten for that woman now.”
This description softens a bit of the hardness my divorce has created in me. It gives me hope. It makes me feel that real love exists. “You haven’t spoken about your mother.”
There’s a crackle in the air around him before he says, “She passed a few years back.”
“Were you close to her?”
“No. No, I wasn’t, but I should have been.”
“Why weren’t you?”
His jaw clenches and he cuts his stare, seeming to struggle with words, I never get to hear. Our food is set in front of us. We chat with the waitress and by the time she’s gone, my mother is texting me. “She’s about twenty miles out,” I say. “Just enough time to eat.” I stare down at the burger with a huge bun and cheese bubbling everywhere. “It looks amazing.”
“It is,” Gabe assures me, but the light in his eyes is captured by shadows that clearly relate to his mother. He doesn’t want to talk about her. “Try it.”
“If I can keep from wearing it,” I joke, picking it up.
“I’ll lick off anything you get in the wrong places,” he promises, a wicked gleam eating away at those shadows in his eyes.
“You,” I joke. “The things you say.”
“I never say anything I don’t mean.”
In other words, he should have been closer to his mother, but he wasn’t. He sees a flaw in himself there. “And yet you’ve never married. Why is that?”
His mood sombers again instantly. “The same reason I wasn’t close to my mother, Abbie. I’m not a good guy and I’m being unfair to you by pretending that I am.” He slides his plate aside. “I’m not the kind of guy you fall for.”
I slide my plate away. “You’re confusing me. You said—”
“I know what I said. I want you to fall for me anyway.”
“You’re not a good guy, but you want me to fall for you,” I repeat.
“I don’t just want you to fall for me. I’m going to make sure you do.”
“And then break my heart?”
“No. I’m pretty sure you’re my karma. You’re going to break mine.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
Gabe
Abbie leans closer. “What karma, Gabe? What have you done to deserve getting your heart broken?”
It’s a loaded question that I never meant to answer. I don’t know why I even told her karma was calling me. I give her one of my practiced smiles, the kind that covers up all the dirty deeds in my past and convinces everyone that I’m just like them. “Who doesn’t deserve a little romantic karma?” I motion to her plate. “Try the fries.” I dump ketchup on my plate.
She doesn’t try her fries. She studies me, her eyes probing, so damn probing that I can feel them piercing my armor when no one else can. “We don’t have much time,” I remind her.
“No, we don’t,” she says. “So I’ll let you off the hook with that smile and a fry.” She grabs one and dips it into the ketchup on my plate. “But I’m going to ask you again. Your can of worms. You opened it. The kind you open but don’t shut. You wanted to open it. I get to keep it open.” She takes a bite of a fry. “And they’re good. I like them.” She studies me a moment. “And you, Gabe. I like you. Bad karma and all.” She says that but she doesn’t know why I have that bad karma and despite that can of worms I opened, she will never know why.
I grab my burger and decide to fight that bad karma. I’ll make up for my sins with this woman and all the animals in her life and now mine.
“Tell me about your legal career,” I say, changing the subject, needing to know who this woman is beyond her ex-husband.
She laughs incredulously. “What legal career? That’s the problem. I need to fix that and I’m ready to be back working in the field, but with all that’s going on with my mother, I doubt that’s happening anytime soon.”
“Come to work for our firm.”
She straightens. “No. Gabe, I’m not mixing business and personal any more than we already have.” She softens. “But thank you. Your firm is elite and respected. I’d be honored to work there.”
“Then take the job. I won’t be your supervisor.”
“And I’ll be the employee hired by the boss because he’s fucking her.” She shakes her head. “No. No, I can’t be that.”
“You have to make your own name and way. I’ve been around you. I see your spark and your fight, not to mention your passion and intelligence. I’m snagging you before someone else does.”
She reaches out and presses her hand to mine. “Thank you, but I’m sure you can see that I need to do this myself.”
“Do you know how many people would jump on this opportunity?”
“Fuck you and use you, and do so guilt-free because you gave them permission? Yes. I do. That’s not me. That’s not who I want to be with you.”
I can feel this woman soften hard places inside me that I didn’t know could be softened. “You are nothing like I expected, Abbie,” I say, not for the first time. I kiss her hand and the waitress sets a check down next to us. The minute Abbie looks at it, I scoop it up. “Don’t even think about it. I’m a gentleman.”
“And a player?”
I somber again and quickly. There are things I don’t want to tell Abbie, things I won’t tell her, but that’s not the same as lying and I won’t lie to her. “Yes, Abbie,” I confirm. “I have been a player and I haven’t hidden that from you. Me. Women. Fucking and no commitment. That’s been my story.” I lean closer and add, “I fucked around. I made no promises. I also didn’t bring women to my apartment. I damn sure didn’t bring them to my house in the Hamptons. And I didn’t ask them to dinner. I asked them to fuck, but for the record, no commitment means no commitment. I didn’t cheat on anyone. I’m not Kenneth.” I say that and I mean it. I’m not him. Not in the way we’re talking about right this minute.
She studies me for several long beats and I expect some sort of pushback but it doesn’t come. She eyes the check and then me. “Thank you for the burger and fries.”
The waitress appears to take our check and I quickly hand her my card before arching a brow at Abbie. “That’s all? Thank you for the burger and fries?”
“You did colorfully fill in the blanks.”
The tension in my spine eases and I find my lips curving. “Did I now?”
“About all the things that aren’t all that important.”
“And what exactly is important?”
“The reason you chose to be a player.”
The tension in my spine is back because there it is. The secret I won’t ever reveal. “What’s important,” I say, “isn’t what made me that way. It’s who made me reconsider. And that’s you, Abbie.”
“Why me, Gabe?”
“Because apparently, it took a gorgeous redhead with a fiery temper to undo me.”
Heat waves between us and I lower my voice. “Now, I just need to undo you and I will. That’s my mission in life now. Undo Abbie in every possible way. Tear down your walls. Make you melt for me every time I’m near you. Hell, I want you to melt just thinking about me.”
It’s that moment that my check and card are returned. I barely acknowledge the waitress while I sign the receipt, put away my card, and then lean into Abbie. “Let’s go to the ranch and when we’re done, I’m taking you home to my bed, where you can melt on my tongue. Does that work for you?”
Her lips part and then her teeth scrape her bottom lip. A swallow follows before she says, “Yes. I do believe that works quite well.”
I smile and she gives me a sweet, sexy, almost shy smile in return. God, I’m crazy about this woman and as for my secret. I just need to give her other things to think about, like my tongue.
*
**
Abbie
Gabe takes my hand and leads me out of the restaurant, heat radiating up my arm with his touch, and over my chest, my nipples puckered. My sex aching with the promise of his tongue. No man has ever talked to me the way Gabe does. Melt on his tongue. The man is incorrigible and yet I’m so aroused when I’m with him, like every second that I’m with him, it’s pretty clear I like it.
And dinner was good, and so is any time I spend with Gabe despite how guarded he is. I let go of the whole karma thing and focus on getting to know the man beneath the humor and smile that he uses to charm the world into seeing nothing more. But there is more and I find myself wanting to know this man. So much so, that I don’t believe I can walk away without knowing him. And if he didn’t ultimately want to tell me what causes his bad karma, why would he bring it up?
He wants to tell me.
We settle into the BMW and his hand settles on my leg. I’m lost in this man, just letting the heat between us consume me. The drive is short and we pull into the ranch and I suck in air. There are emergency vehicles everywhere.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
Gabe
At the sight of the emergency vehicles, Abbie sits up on the edge of her seat. “What’s going on?”
I keep my voice calm, level. “Law enforcement tend to overreact to high profile residence needs. They’re probably aiding the set-up of the temporary shelter. I’ll call Grayson for news.”
“Aiding the rescue with all those lights?” she asks incredulously. “Why would they do that? That would cause scandal and fear in the community.”
She’s right and my phone is already in my hand, finger already on the button to call Grayson. He answers on the first ring. “Are you at the ranch?”
“Yes, and I was about to call you. It’s a gaggle down here. A neighbor called the police because we were on the property and then the police car scared a horse, and the rider ended up with a broken leg. We’re trying to get everyone cleared out of here before the dogs get here and get spooked, too.”
Relief washes over me. “We’re about to pull up to the ranch. We’ll be right there.” I disconnect and update Abbie.
“Oh thank God. I thought—Just thank God.”
She thought her ex did this and that brings questions to my mind. Nothing about this man coming at her this hard makes sense. Nothing. He’s filthy fucking rich. Why would that property be this valuable to him? This is a conversation I’ve tried to have with her, and the only way I know to get her to open up to me is to be naked, in all ways. The problem is I don’t know if I can get her that naked as fast as I need her to be. Because this isn’t just about naked in body. It’s naked emotionally. I keep going back to there being something that she’s not telling me about this situation.
I pull to the side of the road. “Why are we stopping?” Abbie asks, sounding worried.
I place us in park and flip on the lights, illuminating her features. “You don’t have to tell me now,” I say, turning to her, “but you’re going to have to tell me, or even Reid, what the hell is really going on with your ex.”
“I told you—”
“That you don’t know what this is about, but you assumed he was why there were emergency vehicles here, Abbie. All of the people I’ve involved matter to me. I need to know what I am getting them into. I need to know what you’re into so I can protect you with them.”
“I didn’t ask you to protect me, Gabe, and of course, I assumed he was behind this. He’s come at me hard and fast in the past few hours.”
“There’s a reason.”
“I told you. I don’t know that reason and you acting like I’m lying to you is pissing me off.”
The truck carrying the dogs drives past us. She reaches for the door. I catch her arm. “Where are you going?”
“I’m going to help.”
“We’ll meet them inside the ranch,” I say.
“Let go, Gabe. You and your accusations are too much right now. I can’t take it.”
“I need to know what I’m dealing with. That’s all.”
“And I’ve told you what I know. Let me go.”
“No. Stay with me.”
“So you can sit next to a liar that’s pulling you into some sort of nefarious act that you don’t even understand?”
“So that I can earn your trust.”
“Earn my trust? What about you trusting me?”
“This isn’t about trust. It’s about fear. You’re afraid of him.”
“Yes, I am. Which is why I told you to back off of this. And in case you don’t remember, I did that to protect you and everyone around you. I didn’t bring all these people into this. I tried to keep them out, Gabe. I tried. I pushed you. I—”
I drag her to me, tunneling my fingers in her hair and kissing the hell out of her, a long stroke of my tongue against hers. She presses against my chest, resisting, and that guts me. I deepen the kiss, stroking my tongue against hers yet again, and this time she moans. “Damn you,” she whispers against my mouth. “Damn you, Gabe.”
“Damn me, why?”
“Because you won’t just let me pull back and yet you question me. I can’t win with you.”
“You can. Let me help. Tell me what I need—”
She growls. “More implication that I’m not telling you everything. Really, Gabe?”
“No. Fuck. No. I’m just saying that—oh hell.” I kiss her again and she softens almost instantly. “I’ll stop talking.”
“I think that’s a good idea,” she says and her cellphone rings. “That’s going to be my mother. We have to go to the ranch. I need to help.”
“I know,” I say, but I don’t fucking want to let her go. I have this sense that she’s in trouble that she’s not fully sharing and I have never wanted and needed to protect anyone like I do this woman. “We’ll go help. We’ll talk when we get back to my place.” I kiss her again and release her, flipping off the light and pulling us back onto the road.
She answers her phone. “Yes, mom? Yes, we’re here. I’ll be right in. Yes, I’ll tend to Gabbie and the puppies.” They continue to talk.
I pull us down a dirt road as several cop cars pass us by, their lights off now. Their response still feels too wide and big to me. Or maybe it’s just Abbie’s ex that is making me feel that everything is too wide and big with him. There’s something bothering me. I never get these feelings and have them be wrong.
We pull up to the giant white house, alight with spotlights, the truck filled with dogs parked at the side of the house beside a giant white barn. I pull us to a spot by the front of the main house, and next to several other vehicles.
“Whatever you do,” I say, as I kill the engine, “don’t tell your mother about the lawsuit you got tonight. It’s fake. You don’t need to upset her.”
Abbie turns to me. “A lawsuit, or a trick that your father directed? I think you’re too close to this. You have to back off of this. I have to step back, too. We have to step back until this is over.” She opens the door and gets out.
I’m at the front of the car by the time she gets there, trying to escape. I pull her to me. “That’s not happening. I’m not backing off of this, and here’s what is going to happen: You’re going to tell me everything. I’m going to make this disappear. In between it all, we’ll spend lots of time naked and fucking like rabbits. If you want to argue about this, we’ll do it naked and fucking like rabbits.”
“We’ve been through this, Gabe. You don’t get to make my decisions for me.”
“Call it what you want, but I’m in this. It’s already personal to me and I won’t walk away. You’re personal to me. My fucking father coming after you is personal to me. And in case you don’t get it, he came at me with you. I’m protecting you. I’m shutting him down. If you don’t like it, I’m still in. So, you might as well go home with me and sleep naked with me.” I release her. “Now, let’s go take care of Gabbie.” I turn and start walking.
She rushes up besid
e me and then steps in front of me, her hands flattening on my chest. “You need something. I need to say something.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
Abbie
I stop Gabe’s progress, my hand flattening on the hard wall of his chest, desperation inside me that I can’t even explain, not here, not now. Maybe not ever. And so, I stand there, cold seeping into my bones from the winter evening, warmth replacing it as the heat of Gabe’s body and our connection rushes up my arm.
Gabe’s hands come down on mine, holding them in place. “What do you need to say to me, Abbie?”
“You’re an asshole.”
“And your point?”
“Don’t hurt me and don’t get hurt. That’s an order.”
“Abbie!”
At the sound of my mother’s voice, I say, “That’s an order,” again, and then turn away from him but he pulls me back around to face him.
“I will never hurt you, Abbie. You have my word and I take great pride in my word counting for something.” His voice is low, rough, affected.
“Sometimes people don’t mean to hurt each other. No one goes into a relationship, or no one normal, and intends to hurt the other person. Which of course, makes my command that you not hurt me ridiculous. So—just don’t get hurt. Don’t put yourself so in the middle of this and force a problem.” I laugh without humor. “Okay. Who am I kidding? After that conversation you had with Kenneth, you already did that so I’m back to you’re an asshole. Why did you have to do that?”
“Because you’re not in this alone and we’re not letting him win.” He walks me to him and kisses me. “Now let’s go take care of your mother and the animals.”
“My mother? You want to take care of my mother?”
“Yes. She’s not only your mother, but she’s someone helping these animals. I want to help her. I want to know you. I’m in this. Stop pushing me away. It won’t work.”
I’m far too pleased with all of his stubborn proclamations. I’m far too into this man for my own good, but I don’t think I can fight this anymore. I’m taking him with me, into the deep, dark river that swims with the monsters of my past and I’m praying he has a big enough sword to survive right alongside me. “Yes. Let’s go help my mother.”
His Demand (Dirtier Duet Book 1) Page 15
