by Alexa Riley
Nico sizes up what I brought to the party, and comes up short on his end. He rethinks his claim to Rebecca and gives me a chin lift. It’s a sign for me to get the hell out of his club, and I take it. I’m not a coward and I don’t run from a fight, but I won’t ever put Rebecca in danger.
Once we are outside of the club, I get in the back of the car, still holding her to me. Hank says a word to the other guys and they all disappear into the night. I’m holding Rebecca to me when he gets in and takes us home.
I look down and lock eyes with my little fairy. “Thank you,” she whispers and puts her head on my chest.
I walk out of the bathroom and see Rebecca sitting on the bed. She’s dressed in a tiny pink tank top and white shorts. She must have taken a shower in the other bathroom while I was getting ready for bed.
My body is still on an adrenaline high and my hands are shaking. It’s been over an hour since we got back home and I haven’t said a word to her for fear of saying something hurtful.
“I’m sorry,” she says, and looks at me with those big violet eyes.
“I’m aware, Rebecca.”
“Please don’t be upset with me. I only went to meet up with my friends and have a good time.” I can hear the soft plea in her voice but it’s not enough to soothe my anger.
“A good time? Is that what you call that?”
“No. Thank you for stepping in. I didn’t know what to do.”
“Just get some sleep. It’s late, and I have an early meeting tomorrow. I’ll be in the guest room.”
As I start to walk past her and out of the room she stands up and catches my arm.
“Please don’t go. You’re so upset. Let me make it better.”
“I don’t know how you could possib—”
I stop speaking when her other hand reaches down and brushes the front of my shorts. I’m wearing jogging shorts, but no shirt and having my skin this close to hers is terrifying. I’m hard as a rock, and it’s obscenely clear from the large tent in my shorts. If she keeps this up, I don’t know that I’ll be able to control myself.
“I think I could come up with an idea on how to calm you down.”
I clench my jaw, still unable to form a word.
She lazily strokes her hand up and down my hard shaft over my shorts, but I feel it in every cell of my body. Her fingers trace their way up to the waistband and I feel the tips of her nails graze my stomach.
“Rebecca,” I say, but I don’t know if I’m pleading or scolding.
“Just a little touch. That’s all,” she whispers and leans into me.
I lock my arms at my sides and don’t move an inch. If I touch her I won’t be able to control myself. I’ve never felt a woman's intimate touch, and I’m afraid of how I will react.
She reaches her hand down inside the waistband of my shorts and at the first touch of her skin against mine, I shiver. Being touched there by a woman for the first time is confusing and wonderful. I feel her fingers on my cock and my hips jerk. My heart races and I break out in a sweat. Rebecca moves her fingers and I can’t hold it any longer. My cock starts pulsing and I start to cum. I feel her fingers smear the cum around the head of my cock and down my shaft as I empty inside my shorts. I close my eyes, and let the amazing sensation hit me as she rubs me to completion. Having her get me off is like heaven, and it’s better than anything I’ve ever dreamed of.
Once I'm drained I feel the shame wash over me. I can’t believe I just came in my pants like a teenager. I’m a grown man, and I’ve never experienced anything sexual. I’m so embarrassed and angry with myself.
I grab her wrist, take her hand out of my pants, and storm out of the room. I can’t face that humiliation.
BECS
My fingers are coated in his cum. Looking down at them, I rub the warmth between my fingers. Slowly I bring them to my mouth, and out of curiosity I take a taste of him. The saltiness hits my tongue, and makes pleasure shoot through my body. I wonder what it would be like to taste it directly from him. Would he let me? I’m not sure what came over me in that moment. Every time he showed emotion I reveled in it. I got off on it. Whenever Bray came into the coffee shop, he was almost robotic in nature. I’ve noticed he doesn’t seem to let people get too close to him, but tonight he let me lie on his lap in the car. Then he let me touch him. Whenever he touches me it’s over before it even begins. I want to touch him more.
I’ve always been a forward person, but I’ve never touched a man so intimately before, nor had I wanted to. Maybe I was just thankful that he saved me from Nico tonight. No, that can’t be it. Sam has saved me before, and I’ve never once had any feelings for him beyond sisterly affection.
I just felt so safe with him tonight. When I saw him at the Palms, and saw the look on his face, I knew he wouldn’t let anything happen to me. I may not be out of Nico’s hands yet, but I have shelter with Bray for now—a man I’m not sure how to handle. He’s different. Something about him draws me in. He brings out feelings I’ve never had before.
I’ve thought boys were cute before, but I’ve never wanted more. Bray makes me crave more. The only other time I wanted more was when I wanted a family. When I tried to fit in but failed. But sometimes Bray looks at me and I see hunger. Could he want me as I am or would he want to change me? Would I have to change who I am to fit him?
When he pulled me out of club, I was terrified. I’m not sure how he found me there, but thank God he did. I went looking for Sam. Pissed at Bray for never showing up for the dinner I made him, and even more pissed that I cared. When I got there I couldn’t find Sam, and it wasn’t long before Nico was on me. Normally he just makes snide remarks, but tonight he held nothing back. He was making demands that made my skin crawl. Saying Sam owed him a lot of money but he was willing to let me work it off for him. That I didn’t have to worry, he’d be the only one who would get to use me. Like that was a fucking bonus or something.
Thinking about it again makes me want to vomit. But if Nico doesn’t get what he wants, he made it very clear what would happen to Sam.
I go to the master bathroom and wash the remnants of Bray off my hand. I can’t believe how fast he came. I may be a virgin, but I’m not naïve about sex. A few of the girls I’m friends with at the shelter sell themselves for money. Hell, I’ve thought about stripping before, I just always thought I might be a little too chubby to get a job doing it.
I look in the mirror and notice my eyes are bloodshot and swollen from crying, and my brain feels fried from everything bouncing around in it. What am I going to do about Nico? Where the hell is Sam? I feel almost defeated. Stripping off my clothes, down to just my underwear, I wash my face and make my way back into the bedroom.
I took over Bray’s room to get a rise out of him, but I would be lying to myself if I said that was the only reason. I want to be in that bed with him. I’ve wanted him from the moment he walked into the coffee shop and looked at me like he wanted me. The man in the fancy suit wanting the girl who looked like she belonged on the other side of town, which I did.
But more than anything, after what happened tonight, I want to feel safe. And I felt utterly safe when I laid my head on Bray tonight. Did he sleep in the guest room last night too? He came home so late and was gone before I woke. I can’t fix anything with Nico and Sam tonight, but I can get that feeling of safety back. It’s just across the hall.
Before I change my mind, I head for the guest room. When I slowly open the door, I can make out a form in the bed. I slip in and shut the door behind me, and crawl onto the bed.
“Bray,” I whisper. But he doesn’t respond or move. Gliding under the covers, I can feel he’s on his back and he’s only wearing underwear. I press into him, my warm body to his, but I want to be closer. Sliding my leg so my inner thigh rests on his hard stomach, I wrap one arm around him and bury my face in the side of his neck. He still hasn’t moved.
I can’t help but breathe him in. The smell of him mixed with the smell of vanilla. A giggle slips from my lips at the
thought of him smelling like vanilla. Did he always smell like that, I wonder, or is it something new he used? Does he taste like it too?
Licking my lips, I press them to him, but it isn’t enough. Tentatively I slip my tongue out from between my lips. The moment my tongue touches his neck, I feel his body go solid, and a groan escapes him. Smiling against his neck I whisper, “Are you pretending to be asleep on me?”
”I don’t think anyone could sleep with you pressed against them,” he says, but it sounds like he’s speaking through gritted teeth. Is he mad I’m in here? Surely if he wanted me to leave he would tell me or ask me to leave.
“Does that mean you didn’t sleep with me last night?”
“If you’re asking if I climbed into bed with you last night and wrapped myself around you the answer is no, that’s highly inappropriate.”
“You think I’m inappropriate?” I ask, grabbing on to his earlobe with my teeth and giving a little bite.
“I think you’re testing my control, Rebecca,” he breathes out, like a warning. The idea that I could do something to this man’s control only makes me want to do it more. I want to see his control splinter at my touch.
“Maybe that’s what I want. Maybe I want to see your control snap, and shatter all that perfection you hold onto so tightly. What would happen then?”
“I can promise that you don’t want me to lose my grip on it. You don’t want to know what I want to do to you, what I’ve wanted from you.”
“And what is it you want from me?”
“To keep you, and make you mine in every way.” His words set my body one fire. I feel my nipples go hard and I’m sure he can too with them pressed into his side.
“What if I want that too?” I question. The idea of being only his sparks a longing in me I thought I lost a long time ago. I can hear his breathing grow deeper, but he doesn’t respond.
I crawl on top of him, and I straddle his hips so I can look down at him. My eyes have adjusted more to the darkness. Only the moonlight, coming through the windows that run the length of the entire wall, illuminates the room. His eyes are closed tightly, as if he doesn’t want to look at me. He has to feel that I am almost naked. Both of our sexes only separated by underwear.
“You don’t want me?” I question, feeling a little uneasy that he hasn’t so much as touched me back, and now he isn’t looking at me.
“I want you more than my next breath, but sometimes the things you want most in life are the very things that can destroy you.”
The idea that I could destroy this man is laughable. No one has ever needed me in such a way. But the way the words are ripped from him, as if they’re almost painful, and it makes me want to ease his pain.
“Touch me,” I whisper as I start to work my hips, rubbing his cock against my panty-covered clit.
“No!” he growls, gripping the sheets tighter, as if they are rooting his hands to the bed.
“Fine, I’ll do it,” I moan, as I start to work myself against his hard cock. I cup my breasts and pull at my nipples. White-hot need grips me almost down to my soul. His name is on my lips when I moan, and his eyes fly open to lock with mine. Just for a moment part of his controlled mask falls. The sheer intensity behind it causes my undoing, and my orgasm hits me. It’s hard and fast and I can’t hold myself upright. I feel its intensity and collapse onto his solid, broad chest. Pleasure courses through my body, and all I can do is ride out the wave.
I feel my breathing start to even out, but his breathing is just as heavy as before. His chest moves up and down at a quick pace under my cheek, and I know he’s trying to hold on to his control. His cock jerks against my over-sensitized clit and it causes me to wiggle. He makes a pained sound low in his throat, but I can’t help how sensitive I am.
I barely hear his voice when he says, “You’re even more beautiful when you cum,” as if he didn’t mean to say it aloud. His words cause the sharp sting of tears to hit my eyes. I don’t think anyone has ever called me beautiful before.
“Wow, Vanilla, I think you just gave me the best orgasm I’ve ever had.”
“I didn’t do anything.”
“How about you keep not doing anything,” I respond and slowly start to slide down his body. I want another taste of him, but this time I want it to come from him. When I reach the waistband of his boxers I toy with them. I’ve seen cocks before, but never this close up. I touched him earlier, but now I’m going to get to really see him. Nervous excitement shoots through me at the thought.
“Do it,” he commands, making me snap my head up. We lock eyes and I give a little nod. This is the first time he has initiated anything. He still isn’t touching me, but I feel like I’ve won some little unspoken battle. I grab the band on his underwear, and I feel the slight shake of my hand as I slowly pull them down.
“Touch me,” he says while his fingers tighten on the sheets, making the muscles in his arms flex.
With a soft tug, his cock springs free, and I can’t help but stare for a moment. He’s so much bigger than I imagined. I lift my hand and slowly wrap it around his cock to caress the smooth skin. I cautiously bring him towards my mouth, unsure of what to do. The moment my tongue makes a wide circle around the tip of his cock, I get lost in the sensation.
“Fuck!” The word flies from his mouth, and I’m shocked he said it. Suddenly, I can feel the shift in him, and his intensity is brought to the surface.
“Suck it, my little Tinkerbell, take it all the way in your mouth.” The nickname surprises me, but I find myself blushing and enjoying it. The order is harsh around the term of endearment, his tight control cracking. I’m chipping away pieces of it as I suck his cock. He’s so silky smooth in my mouth that a moan of pure pleasure escapes me.
I take him deeper into my mouth and suck him from root to tip, working him faster each time. His hips start twitching, and it’s almost like I can feel his control is in a fragile cage and at any second could break free.
“Fuck. Your mouth wrapped around me is almost hotter than watching you cum, Tink.” His words make my pussy clench. I wish he would drag me up his body and thrust inside me. The intense ache I feel is only growing and my clit starts throbbing once again. Taking my free hand, I slip it into my panties and start circling my clit. I can feel the juices from my last orgasm.
“I’m gonna cum,” he grunts, and I wonder if he’ll try to pull me off. He has yet to touch me. I suck him faster, wanting him to cum in my mouth. Another growl rips from him, and his whole body stiffens once again. His warm release fills my mouth and the erotic pleasure of having him there triggers my own orgasm. I feel the intense pleasure spread through my body as I greedily suck him down.
Licking my lips, I crawl back up his body, grab on to his chest, and shove my face into his neck. I cling to him as the last of my orgasm fades.
Not long after, my body is taken by sleep. But not before I feel him lift the fingers I used to play with myself to his mouth.
I wake up this morning like I have every other morning for the last two weeks, alone in Bray’s bed. The battle of the wills has been playing out since that night, and it’s utterly delicious. Every evening, Bray comes home for dinner and we eat and talk for hours. He seems to like to listen to me ramble on. I told him about going into foster care when I was ten. How I went to the hospital when I was really sick with the flu, and my mother just left me there—a threat she’d been making for years. I tried to be the daughter that she wanted, but in the end I wasn’t enough for her to want to keep me. I also told him about how being an older kid in the system makes it hard to get a permanent home, even if you try to be what they want. It always seemed like I was just getting shuffled off somewhere else. For the past few days he’s started to open up to me. I know he lost both his parents and things weren’t always great. He works hard for everything he has, but I can hear the hate he has towards his father.
It seems each day he opens up more and more to me, and my mind is consumed with ways to get him to laugh.
The first time I heard him laugh, he came home early and busted me singing and booty dancing in the kitchen to Britney Spears. It wasn’t my proudest moment, but I would have done it all night to make him laugh again. It feels like the smiles and the laughs are coming easier.
I still spend my nights baiting him to touch me, but he hasn’t. I can touch him all I want but he doesn’t return the favor. Surprisingly, he has started telling me what to do. Last night when we went to bed he made me strip all the way down naked, lay across the bed and masturbate while he touched himself. He made me make myself cum twice before he released a splash of semen across my stomach.
I crave his lips on me. I want a kiss from him more than anything, but I will not be the one to do it first. For some reason I need this from him. I don’t want this to be something I pull from him, I want it to be something he gives to me on his own.
Pulling myself from the bed, I go through my normal routine. First calling Sam, who I still haven’t heard from other than a couple of random ‘I’m fine’ texts but nothing more. I feel guilty for not trying to locate him, but for once I just don’t want to get wrapped up in Sam’s mess. If he needs me, I’ll come, but until then I’m going to give him his space. At least I know he has a place to stay. I wanted to go pay the rent on the motel for the next few weeks but Bray was adamant that he would handle it. He doesn’t want me going down there. I thought it was silly, but maybe he is right. I don’t want to risk running into Nico.
Cleaning up from the previous night’s dinner, I plan what I’ll make tonight and do some prep work for it. There isn’t much more to do around here and when I informed Bray of this, he asked me what I would like to do. I told him I could do anything he needed but his response was, “What do you want you do, Tinkerbell?”
“Paint,” I said. Something I hadn’t done in a long time. Something that was only a luxury I would do when I was in school. The next day one of the spare rooms was filled with paints and canvases. At first I just started stacking my pieces when had completed them. Then Bray started hanging them on the walls, adding color to his once-cold home. It doesn’t seem so cold anymore. It makes me feel like he wants me to be a part of his home. Like it is becoming mine too.
