by Rachel James
“Here you are, good men, a little pick-me-up.”
Ansgar’s eyes grew wider. “Princess, what a pleasant surprise.” He grabbed the bowl eagerly. “I should chastise you for getting out of bed, but under the circumstances...”
She chuckled. “I know the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”
Ansgar glanced up and paused. “I cannot deny it.”
She collected the tray again and handed out the bowls to the other guards.
“So, when are you coming back to practice?” another soldier asked.
“As soon as Sherwin declares me fighting fit.”
“Mayhap you should make him some of your porridge.” The men laughed.
She tapped her chin. “’Tis not a bad idea.”
“I wouldn’t risk it, Princess. You’d only ruffle him the wrong way.”
Teagen froze at the sound of Ryce’s voice. “Well, you know him better than I, Ryce.” She handed him the last bowl, and her hand quivered at his intense stare.
“Sit, Teagen. Mayhap it is too soon for you to be leaving your bed.”
Anger surged through her. “And who are you to determine what’s best for me?”
He took a step backward.
“I’m my own person.”
He held her gaze. “I know it.”
“Princess!”
She gasped and darted around. Someone was shouting for her.
“Princess!”
She scanned the courtyard.
“Looks like your physician has discovered you’re missing,” said Ansgar as he handed back his empty bowl.
She grimaced. “Well, good men, it appears I am to return. I hope you all enjoyed your refreshment.”
She glanced at their approving faces. It was hard to imagine there was ever any animosity between some of them when she had first started her training.
She shot Ryce a final look. She had to forgive him. ’Twas the Christian thing to do.
But she could not.
Teagen sat in the small chapel with her head bowed and eyes wide open. It was time for prayers, but she was unable to enter in. She knew what she must do, and would not.
Now she felt distant, from God, and even her fellow Christian family.
She gazed around, envious of the others who openly prayed to the Lord with no apparent conviction in their hearts.
Her chest tightened with a deep longing that could not be fulfilled. A sadness in her soul. She grieved again the loss of her father, this time through adult eyes. But she would not shed a tear.
She peered out from behind her loose hair as everyone stood. Quickly getting up, she paid lip service to the Lord and sang the hymns, the same as other folk in the room.
But it did not come from within.
Since her chills, her heart had frozen, and her anger toward Ryce would keep it cold.
“Where are we going?”
Ryce paused, his grin widened. “You said you liked ice skating, didn’t you?”
She stiffened. “Aye, but that was before I nearly died of the chills.”
He grabbed her hand. “Come, you’ll be safe. ’Tis naught to fear.”
She frowned. “I’m not fearful, only I think Niall may not approve.” She managed to pull herself away from him. “The Dyrahns may invade us at any time, and you want to go skating?”
Ryce dropped his makeshift skates to the ground and folded his arms. “What bothers you, Teagen? You seem to have changed of late,” he said softly.
She sighed and perused his countenance. A pain stabbed her chest. He’d had every opportunity to confess to her, but he’d chosen not to. She should confront him now.
She turned and gazed into the sky, and yet she didn’t want to hear it from his lips. “I’m fine.”
Ryce walked over to her, gently lifted her hand, and traced the creases in her palm. “Come, let’s have a little fun.”
She stared past him to the lake. It did look tempting. “You’re sure it’s fully frozen?”
“Aye, but if you truly doubt me, I’ll go on first to prove it to you.”
She watched him hastily tie his boots on the blunted blades and scramble on the frozen pond. What he lacked in grace, he made up for with enthusiasm. She stifled a chuckle as Ryce’s arms and legs sped rapidly as he tried to remain upright on the slippery surface.
“Go on, Princess. Someone needs to show him how it’s done.”
She whirled around, her eyes grew wider. “Sherwin? You approve?”
He smiled without showing his teeth. “Teagen, you’ve been cooped up for weeks now. It’s about time you got some exercise.”
She quirked an eyebrow. “Aye, but more conventional methods of exercising may not require such large quantities of ice.”
“Here.” He held out his arm. “We’ll do it together.”
Her body relaxed. “Very well. Be sure to remain by my side though. One bout of the chills is plenty for this year at least.”
Sherwin helped her with her boots. “Ryce did a good job in making these."
"Ryce made them?”
“Oh, aye, with the help of the smithy, of course. He’s quite hands-on with creating things. I suppose he has always invented something or other. ’Twas part of his warrior training. You have to be able to get by in any situation, and often with only a handful of materials.”
“Did you not train with Ryce then?”
“Nay, Ryce was on an elite team. I’m handy with a bow, but ’tis about it.”
She gripped his hand and cautiously stepped on the ice. It was not perfectly smooth, and her blade caught on a jagged piece. Sherwin yanked hold of her arm.
“Steady, Princess.”
She gripped at his cloak, took a moment to compose herself, and let go. “You mean, he was trained to be a killer, and you instead to save lives.”
“That’s one way of looking at it, I suppose.” He took her hand once more and guided her toward Ryce, who wore a deep frown upon his face. “I’m afraid things are not as black and white. Ryce is a good man…he took no pleasure in that part of his job.”
She gritted her teeth. Was that supposed to make her feel better? They drew up to Ryce, who sat in the centre of the lake, legs crossed.
“Get up man. Do you want to catch your death?”
Ryce slowly stood. “Sherwin. What a pleasant surprise,” he said coldly.
Teagen glanced from one man to another. “So, are we going to skate or not?” Mayhap if she just kept moving, she’d leave her problems behind.
Six weeks had passed since Teagen’s kidnapping, and despite the initial urgency of preparing the island’s defences, naught had happened. Ryce stood on the battlements. He was on guard duty for the second time that day. He gazed down and watched Teagen training with the rest of the soldiers.
He shook his head in frustration. Teagen had made a full recovery from the chills, but something had altered between them. She was distant. Almost cold. Granted, she was always polite with him, but only on a surface level. All affection had gone.
These last few weeks had been torture, unable to show her his true feelings. Making up his mind, he went down and waited for her to finish. They had to talk. Even if she rejected him, she had to understand.
“Ryce. Were you about to pull me up on my poor technique?”
“Nay. Your skills are excellent.” He took the bow from her hand and put the weapon on a nearby table.
“But I’m not done yet.”
“Aye, you are. We have matters to discuss.”
“What, at this moment? Can’t this wait?”
“Now.” He placed his arm under her elbow and guided her toward a secluded spot by the river. They sat, Teagen perched on a rock, he on the grass. Now that he had her here, he found himself quite at a loss for words.
“Well? This must be of immense import for you to whisk me away so mysteriously.”
He drew in a deep breath. “Actually, I’ve wanted to talk to you for weeks, but as you are aware, I’m not a man
of many words.”
He stared at her profile as she drummed her fingers on her knee.
“The truth is...” He gazed at his hands. “Teagen, I think I have fallen in love with you. When I found you in that boat, and I thought I might lose you—” He stopped himself from prattling on any further.
Teagen stood and walked to the stream. She paused as if contemplating something then turned back to face him. The look in her eyes was not what he had hoped for.
“I’m sorry, Ryce. I was fond of you once, but I’m afraid there can be no kind of relationship between us.”
A sudden coldness hit his core. “What do you mean fond of me once? What has changed your opinion of me?”
She seemed to study him, but he noted she kept her distance.
She laughed and shook her head. “I looked upon you favourably, until the moment I discovered you killed my father. Do you not deny it?”
He was stunned. He could not have foretold this kind of reaction. “Who told you?”
“Eadward. Who else?”
“You will indeed have a bad opinion of me if you believe everything he says.”
“Then it’s not true?”
Ryce sat, his shoulders slumped. “Nay, that part is correct. I did kill your father, but under King Eadward’s orders. Teagen, that moment has haunted me every day since. Not a day goes by when I don’t regret my actions of that fatal night.”
“Your remorse changes naught. Do you not realize your doings have brought me such sorrow? You think I can let this slip by and love you in return? Were you ever going to tell me?”
“In the beginning, no. I was ashamed, and I did not want to hurt you further. As we have become close, I wanted you to know...and yet I was fearful of ruining what was growing between us.”
Tears fell down her cheek.
This was tearing him apart. “I’m so sorry, Teagen.” He moved toward her, but she stepped back.
“I’m supposed to forgive you, Ryce, and I thought I had. At least, when a simple stranger had been my father’s killer. But now that I know it’s you—I’m sorry, I cannot. Forgiving you would be like saying it’s acceptable.”
He couldn’t force her to forgive him, accept him, love him, but knowing she felt this way about him was too much.
“I’m sorry, Teagen,” he said again. “The Elmetian raid was my first mission as lead commander. My orders by Eadward were to kill the king, and if I disobeyed him, he’d take my mother’s life. I was young, and I didn’t know how to stand up for myself.”
“We all have choices, Ryce, and we have to live with the consequences. You should be thankful that I’ve not told Niall.”
“Would you like me to go, Teagen? Say the word, and I’ll be gone. I’ll get out of your life and never return.”
Her gaze met his, the confusion displayed in her eyes. “I know not anymore. I used to be so sure and follow my heart, but now I no longer trust it. Which includes you.”
She turned her back on him. She’d given him her answer. As soon as spring arrived, he would leave. Seeing her daily would be too torturous.
“I’m truly remorseful,” he said, and turned to head back to the fort.
He’d no sooner walked three steps before a white flash shot through the sky. He stopped in his tracks and turned toward the watchtower. There it was again.
“Teagen! Run to the fort. Now!”
Pain stabbed her side from running too fast. She didn’t stop for Ryce but ran, picking up her bow and arrows along the way. She made it inside the fort walls within a few moments. They were already closing the gate. She arrived just in time.
She bumped into Ansgar.
“Princess, thank God you’re safe. I was about to go and find you.”
“What of the villagers? They won’t understand the signal.”
“Worry not. I’m heading over there now. Did you arrange the emergency provisions?”
“Aye, all is in place.”
“Good.”
She stood and watched him head out from the safety of the fortress. “Ansgar?” He turned. “What should I do now?”
“Pray.”
She nodded and climbed the steps to the battlements. Her brother was already talking to one of the commanding officers. Hardly daring to look, she cast her gaze out into the ocean. The shocking sight took her breath away.
A fleet of Dyrahn ships headed toward the south harbour. It would not be long now until they came ashore.
“Where’s Ryce?” asked Niall.
Teagen spun around to face her brother.
“He was supposed to be on duty.”
“I...I...I know not for sure.”
Niall gazed out at the approaching enemy and shook his head. “How are we to defend ourselves against them? Our numbers are far less than theirs.”
“Strategy, not strength, will win us this war, Brother. We have the advantage here, knowing the island and having the higher ground.”
“True. I’d be more at peace if I conversed with Ryce. Inform me if you come across him.”
“Aye, of course.”
“Oh, and do me a favour and find Cinnia? She’ll be a nervous wreck, I’m sure.”
“Very well.”
Teagen headed for the courtyard. The villagers had begun to arrive, and pandemonium had broken loose. They’d brought with them their cattle, chickens, horses, and the fort had become a cramped farm. She didn’t want to think about the smell in such a confined space. Still, luxuries were not important right now. Survival was what mattered.
Teagen spotted a harassed Lunet standing on a wooden stool, directing the influx of villagers.
“Can I help?” she shouted across to Lunet.
Her maid nodded. “They must take up residence on the eastern side for the time being. They need to keep out of the garrison’s way.”
Teagen set about to move the villagers from the fort entrance. She noticed a small girl standing all by herself.
“Where’s your mama, lassie?”
The girl stared at her without answering.
She doesn’t understand me.
Teagen glanced across at Lunet, who seemed to be having the same problem. She shouted over to her. “They do not comprehend us.”
“I wonder if they only speak Wealdic.”
Of course, Niall had mentioned the locals still spoke the ancient language. She wracked her brain trying to remember some of the language she’d learned with Niall.
“Er... Ubi est mater vestra?”
The girl’s face lit up. “In caelo, mea avia spectat post me nunc.”
Teagen furrowed her brow, trying to interpret. “Your grandmother looks after you? And where is she now?”
The girl started to cry. “Nescio. Amisi eam.”
“You can’t find her? Oh, don’t worry, sweetheart. You stick with me.”
Teagen placed the girl on her hip to keep her from being stampeded in the crowd. “What’s your name? Quid est nomen tibi?”
“Iana.”
“Well, Iana, I’m Teagen.”
“Teagen,” Iana repeated. The little girl stroked Teagen’s long braid and snuggled against her neck, sucking her thumb.
“How about we go find ourselves some food, huh? We’re not supposed to be tucking into this secret supply yet, but don’t you worry. I possess the key!” She gave the child a warm smile, and Iana grinned back.
Teagen soon had Iana sitting on a chair helping herself to some bread cakes. The rest of the villagers settled, and the mayhem began to dwindle. Now if only she could find Iana’s grandmother. She signalled over to her maid. “Lunet, this girl has lost her grandma, but you’re right, she speaks Wealdic.”
“Oh, an old lady is searching for someone, although I do not understand her.”
“Would you take Iana to this woman, if you think you’d recognize her again?”
“Sure, come on, lassie.”
The young girl refused to leave Teagen’s side.
She crouched down. “Iana, this is L
unet. Lunet is going to help you find your grandmother. Reperio vestri avia.”
Iana glanced from Teagen to Lunet, then back to Teagen again, and nodded.
“Good lass.” Teagen gave the girl’s hand a little squeeze and let Lunet take her away.
Suddenly remembering she’d promised to go check on Cinnia, she returned to the fort entrance.
Ryce spoke to Niall. Neither of them appeared too happy. On the other side of the courtyard, the soldiers suited up and prepared their weaponry. It was finally happening. The weeks and weeks of buildup had mounted to this instant. The moment when they defended their freedom.
Chapter Twenty-One
“They’ve made camp in the valley, sire," said Ryce as he leaned over.
Niall ground his teeth, “And what of the village?”
“Burned to the ground.”
“Thank God the fort is made of stone.”
“Aye, they’ll find this fortress difficult to siege, making Eadward want it all the more.”
“What’s his strategy?”
“Kenric has been here before. He’ll be aware of our weaknesses. They’ll use them to their advantage.”
“You mean they’ll try to lure us out from the fort?”
“Mayhap.”
“What if we play along? We send out some of the soldiers as a distraction and then attack from the fort walls. How many archers do we possess?”
“Thirty, but their range is limited. We will have to wait for the Dyrahns to get within four hundred yards.”
“We’ll need a good distraction. I’ll travel out with the men at arms.”
“Nay, sire, you’re needed here. Perchance, I should—”
Niall patted his shoulder. “So are you. I’ll go. At least I’ll know the fort is safe.”
Ryce didn’t argue with him. Time enough for that. He stared up at the cloudy sky. The greyness echoed his mood. The sound of the Shieldok drums alerted his eyes to the valley, triggering a volume of unpleasant memories in an instant.
“They’re on the move?”
“Aye.”
Niall turned to him. “I can count on you, can’t I, Ryce? I’m putting my faith in you.”
