by Frankie Love
“You’re kinda killing the mood here, Claire,” he says, unhooking my bra from the back.
“We’ll round back there, I’m sure,” I say, looking up at him as my lacy bra falls to the ground. Being naked with Landon doesn’t feel exposed. It feels like the most natural thing in the world. “Right now I’m just trying to figure out what has your balls in a wad.”
Landon laughs. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard you so crass, Claire.”
“Shut up,” I pout, smacking him on the chest lightly. “Answer. For reals, Landon. What are you so torn up about? I mean, I know there are things you are upset over–like The King’s Diamond going under, and Geoffrey being such a prick. But neither of those things worried you before this afternoon.”
“Before this afternoon?” He runs his hands over my shoulders, looking directly at me. Seeing me. “I worried about ever getting my act together. About waking up in ten years and having nothing to show for my life. I worried that the sum of my existence would be my disposable income. So yeah, I act tough with the guys, but deep down everyone worries about not being enough. I’m no different.”
The mood in the room has shifted. And now Landon is sad, maybe sadder, and I feel deflated. But also, I don’t believe him. I don’t think anyone could feel like I do inside.
“You may feel like your life has torn you up, Claire,” he continues. “But you’re actually luckier than the rest of us. You have a daughter who you love and who loves you. You have the sort of love everyone craves. And you don’t even see what you have.”
Everything Landon says surprises me. I thought he was this typical alpha-male, a bad boy with bravado, but he is so much more than that.
He may like to sleep with women, but he also has a heart.
And he’s sharing that with me.
“I know that Sophia is a gift,” I tell him. “I know I’m lucky to be her mother. I want to be her mother. But Landon, it’s different. My choices are already made for me. Now I feel like I don’t have any say in my life. It’s like ... my life is always going to be me needing my mom, me piecing together things for Sophia. I just—I just wanted more. For all of us.”
“Fuck that, Claire.” Landon’s hands grip my shoulders, steadying me, but also not allowing me space to retreat—which, right now, is exactly what I want to do.
“Don’t talk like that to me,” I tell him, tears pricking my eyes.
“Well, then, don’t say shit that isn’t true,” he says. “I don’t know what happened to make you a victim but, Claire, you have an entire life to live. You can make any choice you want to. Any day.”
“No, you can, Landon. You hold all the cards. I hold ... nothing.”
“Then hold onto me. Let me carry you.”
“Don’t. You don’t mean it.” I pull in my lips, scared of his eyes, looking at me like he knows me. Like he knows my deepest fears, my biggest dreams. Feeling like he sees all of that–and then realizing he does.
Landon does know me.
“I mean it, Claire. Try and trust me.”
I’m fighting something I want.
And maybe Landon is giving me the greatest gift by telling me I can stop. Stop saying no.
“I don’t know if I can let you carry me forever. But tonight, yes. Tonight I’ll go anywhere you take me.”
“Well, fuck, woman—that’s better than what you gave me a few weeks ago,” he says, a smile spreading across his lips.
I shake my head, not understanding.
“The night of Ace and Emmy’s wedding, I asked for a night,” Landon explains. “But you were only willing to offer me an hour. This is a step in the right direction.”
And then he lifts me into his arms, and I hold tight.
Landon
When Claire says that she will give me this night, I know what I must do beyond all else: make her realize that she can’t live without me. Because God knows I don’t know how else I’m going to prove to her that I’m the sort of man she needs. I know I’m not good enough, know I’m not much of anything.
That meeting downstairs tore me up in ways I wasn’t expecting. I never think of myself as a man caught up in image ... but all that changed the moment I realized there is a woman who I want to see me as a strong, solid man.
And, right now, what do I have to offer her? I have some cash—but no house, no job, no plans. I’m a floater. But, fuck, I’m ready to be grounded.
I want to put down roots with her.
And, if I’m being completely honest, I also want to fuck her. Now.
Setting her on the bed, I watch her eyes close. For a moment I’m scared she wants to back out. Wants to pack her bag and leave.
But then her gorgeous green eyes open again, and she invites me into her heart by giving the slightest nod of her head, saying Yes.
To me.
To this night.
“You are divine.” I kiss her neck as she falls back on the bed. My body covers her and even though I know I’m nothing, nothing she needs ... she’s all I want.
Her legs wrap around my waist effortlessly. As she draws me near, I smooth her hair away from her face, entranced by the way her stark platinum-blonde contrasts her still-bright red lips. Lips I have to kiss.
I press my mouth to hers and she moans softly under me, as if she wants my kiss, too. This empowers me, and I find myself relaxing against her body, letting my tongue slip into her warm mouth.
As our bodies press against one another, my hard cock pushes between her legs. I sit up on my knees, pulling her up into my lap.
“You’re so hard,” she says, her hands on my shoulders, her panties still on. I want them off; I want to get her off. My cock throbs against her, and I know she loves it because she begins grinding against me. Her hips swivel against my groin, and she pulls closer to me as we rock together.
My hands run over her tits, cupping their perfection, and then pulling a hard nipple into my mouth. Sucking her skin makes my erection swell, and I feel the smile cross her lips as our foreheads press against one another.
“I love it when you touch me,” she whispers. I ease her up on her knees so I can tug down her panties. Once they’re off it’s clear her perfect pussy is begging to be kissed. Her panties are sopping wet.
I gently move Claire, so she is laying on her back. The tip of my hard cock presses against her opening, but she isn’t ready for my massive cock. I need to ease her into it, ease her onto me.
I lower myself so I can work over her soft pussy lips. My mouth quickly kisses her entrance, as I gently spread her knees further apart so I can slip my tongue between her thighs, into her.
“Mmhhhhmmm,” she moans, squirming. “Baby, I want to suck you off while you lick me,” she begs.
I’m not going to turn down her offer, so we switch positions, me on my back, her on top of me, and I , hold her waist as she straddles me, facing my cock so she can blow me hard. And her gorgeous ass is right in my face, giving me access to everything I need.
She leans over on cue, taking hold of my cock in her hands, and as she is bent over me her tits graze against my chest, getting me even harder. As she moves, her perfect ass moves up and down, taunting me.
I grab hold of her ass cheeks, pull her onto my face, wanting to suck her and eat her and lick her all night.
She tastes like creamy honey, her skin so soft, and her juice so sweet. Everything about her demands to be spread and tasted. I use my mouth to open her pussy lips, my tongue going deeper into her entrance.
Her mouth finds my cock, and she bobs above me as she begins sucking my hardness, her hands on my balls, on the base of my shaft. She’s working me over so good and fast. My cock throbs as she sucks, and I hold her waist so her pussy stays right against my mouth.
I blow soft air into her, and I love the immediate reaction her body offers. Soft juice pours from her all over my mouth, and I flick my tongue against her clit, hard and fast. As I do, I feel her sucking me deeper, taking more and more of me in her mouth.
I don’t want her to gag, but I do want my come all over her. I want to build up to a massive release.
She groans as I press a finger in her pussy. She drips as I bang her with one finger, then two. When I press in a third she stops sucking and rests her forearms on either side of me, as if unable to do anything but enjoy what I’m giving.
I pound into her until she gushes all over my chest. I keep moving in and out, the intensity deepening as her body stiffens, as her panting intensifies, as she comes again and again.
Then she collapses in pleasure, her perfect ass the only thing I see.
She isn’t a greedy lover, though; her hands still hold my hard cock, and she regains her breath as she turns around to face me.
“You were hungry,” she says, a sexy smile on her face. God I could look at his woman all day.
“You were ready for a release.”
“You. Are. Incredible. Like, insane.” She straddles me again, this time looking down at me as she sits on my thighs, my cock still in her hands.
I want her to sit on me so bad—I know I’ll only last a few minutes, but at this point I don’t care.
“You need to fuck me, Claire.” I bite my lip. “Now.” My cock is veiny and hard and just so ready to explode.
She doesn’t hesitate. She lowers herself onto my cock and raises her shoulders as she does, inhaling, her stomach flattening as she gently works herself down on top of me.
“Your cock is so ready,” she says, holding my base as she sinks onto me.
“You like it?” I ask.
“I love it.”
She begins grinding against me. This time, the moment she starts moving, her moans are more like cries.
“You are so deep in me,” she pants. “It feels so good.”
“I’m gonna come so fast.”
“Wait, I want your seed on me, all over me,” she says, her eyes meeting mine in a moment of vulnerability.
“You sure?”
“I just want to be covered by you Landon.... Is that weird?”
“No, it’s fucking hot. It’s fucking everything.”
Before I come, she lifts herself off me, her thighs slick and her eyes glistening with desire.
She takes hold of my cock and begins running her hand up and down it as I start coming, ropes of my milky release hitting her face, her tits, her mouth.
She lowers against my cock, as if not wanting to miss a single bead of come as it shoots from me. She licks her lips, tastes me, and I watch, mesmerized, as she swallows me.
She presses a finger to the come on her rounded breasts, swipes across the cream, and then sucks it off her finger.
The single motion gets me hard again. I feel her pussy growing wet and she leans down, taking my cock in her mouth for a second time.
It’s as if she can’t get enough.
As if all she wants is more.
More of me.
And I may not have a house for her. And I may not have a job. I may not have anything she needs.
But she still makes me feel like a fucking King.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Claire
As we step out of the shower, after washing ourselves off one another—and another round—my phone starts buzzing.
And though I’m not in any hurry to return to anything besides this sex-cocoon Landon and I have created, I know I need to be a responsible adult. It could be an emergency. It could be Sophia.
I grab a towel and wrap it around me as I walk into the bedroom.
“Is everything okay?” Landon asks, coming up behind me, not wrapped in anything. I know this because I feel his perpetually hard cock pressed against my ass.
This man has undone me.
And I just want him in me—like, 24/7.
But being a grown-up means reading texts when I’m out of the country, instead of giving in to his erection.
Looking at the message, I groan. “Not important ... but um. Apparently we’re late for dinner.” I grimace. “Emmy says everyone is waiting for us. They’ve already had pre-dinner drinks. Because that’s a thing here.”
“Oh shit, I totally forgot. What time is it?”
“Eight-thirty.” I wince, knowing these formal English dinners are later than I have back home.
Mostly because back home I eat at five o’clock. I have to eat that early in order to have time for Sophia to take a bath, work on her sight words, and practice reading BOB books before her bedtime.
But eight-thirty is still half an hour past Arthur and Helen’s designated dinnertime.
“We’re screwed,” I say. My thumbs hover over my iPhone. “What should I say?”
“That you’re sorry, but you’ve been busy screwing you fiancée.”
“Ha.” I smirk. “Kinda true though, isn’t it?”
“Tell her that,” Landon says. “It will get us off the hook. Who can argue with two people in love?”
“And that’s us?” I ask, my smirk becoming more of a half-smile.
“I don’t think you’re in love with me,” he says, his arms wrapping around me from behind. “But, yeah. I’m completely in love with you, Claire.”
“That’s the sex talking.” I dismiss his words, because it’s safer. Easier. Less terrifying.
“It’s not.” He turns me to face him. “It isn’t, Claire. I love you. I want to be the man you want. The man you need. But I know you aren’t ready for that. For us.”
My breathing is heavy. I feel out of sorts, and I hate that. I don’t want to panic. I want to be the sure, confident Claire.
But I don’t know what to do with this confession. I’m unprepared for it. No one has ever offered their love to me. No one has asked me to be theirs. No one has pretended to be my fiancé and then fallen in love with me.
And I’m scared this might just be the magic of the vacation, the drama of the bankruptcy and the secret we’ve been keeping, that makes him feel like he could change his entire life for me.
I can’t give my heart to a man who might have second thoughts the moment he meets my daughter. The moment he’s back in Vegas with the single women and the sex and the casino. I can’t compete with that.
I don’t want to compete for anything. I just want to be loved and let that be enough.
“I can’t say those words back to you, Landon.”
“That’s okay.”
“Is it?”
“Yes. Claire, look, I know you deserve a better man than me. I’m not going to trick you into loving me. And I want you to want me. Does it fuck with my ego to know the woman I’ve fallen for has reservations? Of course, it seriously does ... but that doesn’t change anything. I still want you.”
The phone is still in my hand. I don’t know what to text Emmy. Do I want to be silly and stay in this make-believe relationship? Knowing Landon’s heart is all in? Knowing I don’t know if I can get there?
And even if I can ... I know there are some major things I’m gonna need to deal with before I can fully give myself to anyone, ever.
And I don’t know if I’m ready to open that can of worms. I haven’t been ready for five years.
“We should get dressed,” I tell him, knowing it isn’t what he wants, what he deserves.
“Just like that?” he asks, his face solemn.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him, knowing I’m hurting him by pulling away. “But, listen, I promised you the night, and it isn’t over. We just need to eat dinner and appease the people downstairs. Then I’ll come back up here with you.”
“We’ll see,” he says, swallowing hard, then turning from me.”
“We’ll see?” I know my voice is stretched thin, but seriously? I know I’m not everything Landon wants, but I don’t want him to get cold with me just because I can’t say those three all-important words back to him.
“No, you’re right, let’s just get dressed. I kinda feel worn out.” He turns to the closet and begins rooting for something to wear.
“Don’t be mad,” I tell him, watching
him pull on pants and a button-down shirt. I’m still in the towel.
He snorts.
“Don’t, Landon. Don’t be mad at me because I can’t tell you I love you. That’s not fair.”
“I’m not mad. I’m just scared.”
“Scared of what?”
He turns to me, his face raw with the emotion of the day. “Scared I’m going to lose something I never had. Scared it took too fucking long to figure out what that was.”
He walks to the bathroom, and shuts the door on me.
I type a quick message for Emmy. Sorry. We’re just running late. Feeling a little overwhelmed with this whole thing. I think we’re having our first fight. Xo
It’s the most honest I’ve maybe ever been with her.
And the thing is, it isn’t Emmy I want to tell my whole heart to.
I want to tell Landon. I want Landon.
But I’m scared, too. Scared in ways he isn’t. I’ve been rejected before.
Been hurt.
Been ruined.
And it’s taken me five years to become normal again.
I can’t let that happen a second time.
Landon
Dinner is a long, drawn-out English affair. Ace, Emmy, and Tess have joined us, and their presence helps lighten the mood considerably.
Geoffrey has seemingly spent the afternoon coming around to his own double wedding in a week. He says, over the salad course, that one positive of a quick wedding is that it will happen before the company announces bankruptcy, so at least the event won’t be marred with the impending disaster.
“When do you plan on announcing it?” Ace asks.
“We want to wait as long as possible,’ Dad says. “I want to give everyone the severance they deserve. Or at least plenty of time to find other work before the stores close for good.”
Geoffrey huffs. “Dad, you can’t give severance when there’s a bankruptcy. I’ve explained this. Everyone just gets what we can salvage in a final paycheck, and we cut our losses.”
Mum and Dad look at one another across the table, as the realization of what losing this company means seems to sweep over them.
