by Frankie Love
“Connor won’t let me. I have a five-thousand-square-foot home, three cars in the garage, a diamond ring on my finger worth a small island—yet he says a woman should be able to manage her own home.”
“Well, he grew up in different world. You have play dates to schedule, school uniforms to get to the dry cleaners, and mommy yoga to attend.”
“Your sarcasm isn’t helping.” Mary lets out a defeated sigh, propping herself up on the bar stool at the granite island.
I spray disinfectant on the floor and do a final clean. At least the dinner disaster is distracting her from noticing my non-virginal status.
“I’m not being sarcastic,” I say, defending my stance. “Connor and his five brothers were delinquents and his mom barely wrangled those kids through the Boston Public School. It’s apples and oranges. Can you imagine Connor’s mother dealing with life here, in Vegas, married to man like Connor? He has a reputation, and so do you.”
“Reputation or not, I’m over my head. Something’s gotta give. And this is the fourth night this week Connor has had a dinner meeting.” She walks to the freezer and pulls out a box of chicken nuggets and a bag of peas. “It’s times like this, when I’ve ruined dinner and I forgot to take a shower and I’m flying solo—again—that I wish Mom were still alive. She knew how to keep everything together. But me? I’m just one hot mess.”
Hardy and Bailey come into the kitchen, screaming about a tablet not working. Bailey’s face is streaked with tears and Hardy has crossed arms, all huffy and annoyed.
It takes one second to assess the situation and come to a decision.
“Mary, sometimes all anyone can do is one day at a time. And you,” I say, pointing at her, “are off duty for tonight. Get some Chardonnay, run a bath, and turn off your phone. Got it?” Rooting through the fridge, I find a chilled bottle and hand it to her. “Look, it’s a screw top—easy access.”
She doesn’t resist, doesn’t say if or but, doesn’t try to coax the kids to stop fighting. She just gives me a grateful look, grabs a wine glass, and leaves. She may be over her head, but she isn’t stupid.
Fifteen minutes later, Hardy and Bailey are sitting at the table eating their microwaved dinner. I have Justice in my arms, offering her a bottle while simultaneously squirting ketchup on plastic plates.
I may have a dad who’s arranging my marriage, but I also have a family I would do anything for.
Later, when the kids are happily watching Phineas and Ferb, and Justice is dozing in her swing, I take a break from unloading the dishwasher and check my phone.
Frick. Totally forgot about my plans with Lucy. She texted an hour ago.
Lucy: Where are you lady? What are we doing tonight?
I look at the clock. It’s only seven, and technically I could still pull off a night out with her. But, looking around my sister’s house, I see another load of dishes, a pile of unfolded clothes, and a sticky floor. I know what I should do.
I may hate the idea of marrying Grotto, but family is family. Not doing what my father has asked of me would excommunicate me from the family ... and my sister needs me. And I need her.
She’s my family, and family is more important than going out with friends—and certainly more important than marrying the love of my life.
Me: Sorry Lucy. I suck. But I’m on Auntie duty. Don’t hate me. Let’s do coffee this week. Xo
I slide my phone off, and roll up my sleeves.
Maybe when I’m done here I’ll treat myself to a quick late-hour workout. It will help me clear my head.
God knows, today I need it. Grotto. McQueen. Mary. I need to get my priorities in check.
The only thing I have that’s just mine is MMA fighting.
I’ve given up the idea of marrying for love, and now I’ve also given up my virginity. But the one thing I want to keep, for as long as I can, is my MMA gloves.
I won’t give those up without a fight.
I just hope it doesn’t come to that.
Chapter Six
McQueen
The dinner is boring as hell.
I mean, Emmy is a doll, obviously. But Tess made it to dinner and she and Jack have been talking about his latest recordings throughout the appetizers and the first few bottles of wine.
I’m ready for some fucking Budweiser.
I may play a cool-ass game, but deep down my roots are pretty middle America. My dad has a mechanic shop and my mom bakes tater tot casserole and is a secretary at an Elementary school. You can’t get much more red, white, and blue than them.
Right now, sitting in this five-star restaurant where the steak has been aged sixty days and the fucking French fries are doused in truffle oil, I miss my mom’s Sunday meatloaf, the sound of the game blaring on the front room TV.
I haven’t been home for a while. I hate making excuses, but what I hate even more is explaining my life in ways they can understand. Of course, my parents don’t have a clue what I’m really up to, and neither does my brother, Mark. Like hell I’d tell them. I can’t even imagine what they’d say.
Still, I feel a long way from home sometimes. Even if the people there never understood me.
The truth is I hardly understand my goddamned self.
I also don’t understand why JoJo has been on my mind all night long.
“You okay, McQueen?” Emmy asks across the table. “Need some more wine to take the edge off?”
“Naw,” I say, waving her off. “I don’t know what my deal is. Maybe I’m tired.”
“Maybe you’re always so busy hustling for the ladies, you don’t know what it means to just relax with your friends,” Jack suggests.
Turning the tables, I ask, “Where’s your lady tonight, Jack?”
“She won’t be here for a week, shit. You know that; she’s taking your stage.”
“Oh, yeah,” Tess says, animated. No surprise. Tess always wants to be in on the gossip. “How do you feel about that, McQueen? That stage has been yours for years.”
“It’s cool.” I shrug. “The guys at The Cockpit are solid, and it’s honestly an easier gig than what I did at Stripped. There, I did an actual revue, like dance numbers. There’s a coach and everything, teaching us the choreography.”
“And this new show?” she asks.
I snort. “This new gig is just straight-up stripping. Different skill. We rehearse, but we come up with our own routine.”
“And what’s the skill? Jack asks, laughing. “Make sure you get a nice wax?”
His words piss me off, and I don’t know why. I’m usually pretty good about the shit I get over my profession. Still, it annoys me.
“Right. Gotta get nice and clean for those women who you might have had a chance with until they saw me.”
“Ha, nice one,” Ace says giving me a fist bump. Emmy pinches his arm as he does.
“Honestly though, Tess,” I say. “I’m working out way more with this new job. Straight-up stripping is no joke. I can’t have movies like Magic Mike put me to fucking shame. I gotta put out.”
“Seriously, bro, it’s our money on the line,” Ace says.
I know he’s joking, but it’s still hard to swallow. I mean, there’s a fucking lot of pressure tied up in this. Ace, Jack, and Landon have all put cash into the club, and their payoff hinges on my ability to draw a crowd. I can’t fucking mess this up.
The waitress finally brings out the main course and I eat as quickly as possible. I want to ditch this dinner party and go let off some steam.
Steam I didn’t know I had. I’m all wrapped up in this conversation, the pressure and money and having the right fucking moves.
And also, JoJo. I can’t get that woman out of my mind.
Usually, it’s wham, bam, thank you ma’am ... but with her, all I want is seconds.
I need to punch something and fucking get a grip.
Pushing out from the table, I set my linen napkin on my cleaned plate. “I’m out.”
“You sure? We’re gonna get drinks at the
bar before we call it a night,” Emmy says.
“Thanks, but I’m good. I’ll let you guys enjoy your little double date.” I smile, tousling Jack’s hair to annoy the shit out of him. “Don’t have too much fun without the life of the party.”
Leaving the restaurant, I swing by In-N-Out for a shake, a few hamburgers, and a few orders of fries. I’m suddenly starving. Must have been that killer workout this afternoon. My legs are still aching from it.
With the food in my Jeep, and nowhere to eat it, I decide to head over to Kit’s Gym. Maybe he’s sitting in his office and wants an excuse to B.S. at the end of the night. What are my other options?
I don’t want to call Landon and go sit with him and Claire while they watch The Bachelor or some domestic shit.
What the fuck happened to my friends? They got themselves wifed up and left me hanging. I need to get some new guys to go out with, or this town is gonna get old, real quick.
The gym’s open, lights are on, so that’s a good sign, but the moment I step foot inside I hear Kit talking animatedly with someone. The words of the exchange become clear as I walk into the open gym.
“I need a fight. Soon. I just feel like my time is running out.”
I’d recognize JoJo’s sexy, raspy voice anywhere.
“You got lots of time, girl. You’re twenty-three, in prime shape. We don’t need to rush this.”
“Maybe you don’t, but I do. My family ... listen, it’s complicated.”
“What are you saying?” Kit asks.
Wanting them to know I’m here, I cough loudly.
“Hey. Uh, anyone hungry?” I hold up my bag of food.
Kit clenches his jaw, looks at the floor.
“Maybe I’ll just go,” I say, taking a step back, not wanting to intrude on anything.
“It’s fine. Stay,” JoJo says, looking up, meeting my eyes. “Kit, I’m not trying to be intense, I just wanted you to know where I’m coming from. Okay? This means everything to me.” She brushes away a tear and I’m reminded, again, of this girl’s layers. She’s a fucking onion at this point.
“I’ll do whatever I can for you, Jo,” Kit tells her, pointing a fatherly finger at her. “You’re a keeper—you know that, right?”
“Something like that.” She looks at the ground, but Kit doesn’t let her off the hook. He gives her a quick hug, smacking her back as he does.
Pulling back, he tells her, “I’ll find something for you, Jo. Promise.” Looking over at me he adds, “I’m gonna pass on the grub. I’m beat. But feed this girl—she probably hasn’t eaten all day. Am I right?” he asks JoJo.
She shakes her head, smirking. “Not true. I had leftover chicken nuggets for dinner. And cold peas.”
“I got you covered.” I hand her the chocolate shake.
She takes it from me, smiling as she does—and then smiling wider as Kit leaves, locking the door behind him.
JoJo
I’m inhaling this fast food—after the day I’ve had, screw the low-carb, high-protein diet I’ve put myself on. I’m not a crazy girl, obsessed with being skinny. The diet is my effort to be as lean as possible, to be ready for a fight.
I hope Kit heard me. That he’ll find me one. Right know, I just need something of my own to hold on to.
I swallow a bite of burger, and look up, realizing McQueen is grinning at me in that perfect way of his—the one where his straight, white teeth gleam, and his chin juts out ever so slightly. And the dimples. He has one in each cheek. It’s ridiculous.
And hot as hell.
Maybe he can be the something I can hold on to.
Stop. It. Now.
I can’t let myself go down that rabbit hole ... I’ll be more lost than Alice, and right now I need to stay grounded in reality. I can’t let myself fly away into a fantasy. Late night hook-ups do not fall in that category.
“Earlier you told me you were going out tonight,” he says, dipping a fry in ketchup.
We’re sprawled out on the floor of the gym. His back is against the wall, and I’m crossed-legged in front of him, the food between us. At this exact moment I’m grateful for a greasy barrier, because I have this desire to ask him to scoop me up in his solid arms and carry me away.
“Earth to JoJo, you okay?”
“Yeah, what did you ask?”
“You said you were going out tonight?” His eyes squint, as if trying to get a read on me.
I need him to stop being so damn handsome. I can’t concentrate.
“Right. Well, I stopped by my sister’s house after leaving the gym, and she was having a hard time. I sent her to the bath with a bottle of wine, and I took care of the kids.” I shrug, knowing that when I left Mary’s the kids were all asleep, the laundry was done, and the kitchen gleamed.
Connor still hadn’t come home, but I left feeling good about my decision.
I keep talking. “So Lucy, my friend who I had plans with, thinks I’m a flake for the thousandth time—but family comes first, you know?”
“Something like that. Maybe you just have a really close-knit family. I haven’t seen my brother in a year.”
“That’s terrible,” I tell him, meaning it.
I can’t imagine not seeing my sister for a week. I pick up my nephew from his private school a few days a week, I eat dinner around my sister’s kitchen table, I swim in the pool in her backyard. Our lives are connected. They are the fabric of my days.
McQueen shrugs. “I like my family; it’s just that my family is so different from me. They have no idea about what I do for a living, and I’d die if they knew.”
I raise my eyebrows, relating to him more than he knows.
“What’s that look for?” he asks me.
“My family doesn’t know I’m training for another MMA fight. They don’t know I do this at all.”
“Really?” McQueen’s jaw drops. “That’s nuts. You’re here all the time. Do you have another job that explains the bruises?”
“I don’t have another job,” I admit, wondering how much I want to reveal. “My Dad and brothers would never understand this. Let’s just say my family is ... old school about gender roles.”
He nods seeming to understand. I don’t think he quite gets it, though. My dad isn’t exactly a safe person. He does shady stuff, every day. My brothers—well, I don’t even want to know what they do all day. More of the family business.
In our house we have an arsenal of guns, drugs in a safe, and no one is allowed over, ever, if they aren’t on a pre-approved list.
“I cover the bruises with makeup the best I can. But honestly, the men in my house don’t really pay me much attention. It’s not like they’re inspecting me or something. And my sister is usually so frazzled she doesn’t notice, either.”
“Huh.” McQueen seems to have another question on the tip of his tongue, but he holds back. I appreciate him not prying. But then it’s like he can’t help himself. “You’re safe though, right, JoJo? At your house? The guys you live with, they wouldn’t hurt you or anything, right?”
“Of course they wouldn’t.” I wave off his fears. “It’s not like that. It’s just ... they have ideas about how I should live my life.”
“You could always start over, like me,” he says. “I skipped town the moment I graduated high school and only go back for holidays.”
I shake my head. “Yeah, my family isn’t like that. I could never leave my sister. My family sticks together.”
“Kit’s right, you know.” McQueen wipes his hands on a napkin, wads the garbage up, and stands to toss it in the trash.
“About what?”
“He said you’re a keeper. I get why your family doesn’t want to let you go.” He walks to me and pulls me up to stand.
“Why’s that?” I want to understand McQueen. If there’s more to him than a handsome face and capable cock, I want to know about it.
“You’re different,” he tells me simply.
“That’s what you told me after we had sex this afternoon
,” I tell him as he snakes his arms around my waist. Not even meaning to, I let him. I want him. “You said I was ‘different.’ Not exactly post-sex words of affirmation.”
“A girl like you needs to be told how great she is?” he asks, looking at my lips as he talks.
I lick them without thinking. The only thing on my mind is him pressed up against me, taking me again.
“I don’t need compliments. But if we’re doing this again, I need to know I did okay the first time,” I tell him, feeling his hardness press against my core. My thighs quiver in excitement.
“Oh, girl,” he says, his mouth so close to mine. “You were fucking perfect.”
And then his lips are against me, and my arms wrap around his neck. I’m aching to get closer.
Aching to feel his skin again.
Fuck reality.
I want to fall down that rabbit hole.
Hell, I want to fly.
Chapter Seven
McQueen
This girl is going to be the end of me. And I never even saw it coming.
She asked for no strings attached, and that’s what this is, but there is something about her—the softer side of her I never expected, the way she looked when she spoke about her family. She seemed so small, so vulnerable. Like she needed a fucking man to take care of her.
When her lips press against mine, so tentative, so naive, all I want to do is teach her everything I know. Show her how to get the most out of our time together.
I pull away, needing to get her out of those little gym shorts, I need to see that sweet, soft pussy again, need her to know what sort of assets she has. Let her know how fucking hard she makes me when I get a glimpse of the space between her legs. The legs she’s never opened for any man but me.
I get on my knees before her, tug down those little shorts, and inhale her perfect mound. Oh, fuck, she is so sweetly trimmed, no fucking fancy Brazilian shit. JoJo is all woman; she’s not trying to be anything but herself and that fucking turns me on like no one ever has before.
