by Becky Lower
“Any college degree accompanied by your knowledge of programming is all that’s required by the state.” Mrs. Edwards rose. “Give the idea some thought. We could offer at least one class during the final six-week period of the year, which doesn’t begin until mid-May. You’ll have time between now and then to update our systems and put together a basic curriculum for the class.”
Caroline rose as well and followed Mrs. Edwards to the door. “Thank you for your faith in me. I will definitely consider your offer.”
“Good. Now take care of your next student.” Mrs. Edwards’ voice held a hint of mirth.
Grant, in all his glory, stood in the hall outside Caroline’s office. Her heart stuttered, the erratic beat not only due to the job offer.
Chapter Sixteen
Grant stood in the hallway outside Caroline’s office, attempting to slow his racing hormones. Grateful for Mrs. Edwards’ presence, he focused his attention on the principal first rather than on Caroline. “Hello, Mrs. Edwards. Caroline.” He nodded his head toward them.
“Your timing’s impeccable, Grant.” Mrs. Edwards took a step away. “I just finished. Have a good lesson.” She smiled back at them and hustled down the hall.
Neither he nor Caroline took a step. For a long moment, they stared at each other. Grant’s fingers itched to touch her cheek, but he restrained himself.
Finally, Caroline backed into her room. “I really expected you to muddle through the program on your own rather than come here.”
He followed. Her soft voice floated over him like a cloud before she cleared her throat. “This program’s been my nemesis, but your step-by-step guide helped me make sense of things. One part is still causing me trouble, though.” Grant controlled the tension in his voice. “Shouldn’t take more than a few minutes.”
She sat and motioned for him to take the seat next to her so they could both stare at the computer screen. She released a shaky breath when he sat, almost as if she feared he’d stand through the session rather than sit beside her. He pointed in the guide to the part of the program where he’d gotten confused.
With quick, agile explanations, she jockeyed through the steps to the portion where he had his problems. She then let him use the mouse and work through the troublesome part of the program rather than her racing through the steps for him.
While he appreciated her teaching technique of guiding the student through the work instead of merely scrolling through the program quickly herself, the nearness of her made concentration on the software difficult. He tried very hard to manage his feelings while actually learning something. Within a few agonizing minutes, they were done, and Grant leaned back in the seat. “This thing’s easy enough when I’ve got the expert beside me.” He rolled his shoulders, fighting the knot that had taken up residence. “Now if I can duplicate the steps when I’m on my own, I’ll be a happy man.”
Caroline shut down the computer. “That’s why I prefer to have you go through the steps yourself instead of me telling you what to do. So when your brain can’t process the information, the muscle memory from your hand comes into play.” She took a breath and turned away from him. “But if you have any more problems, you could ask Jessica Armentrout, who stopped by earlier. Supposedly, she’s a whiz at computers.”
The tension returned between Grant’s shoulder blades. “So, you talked to Jessica. Did she come by for help with the program?”
“No. She only showed up to warn me to back off from you.” Her gaze drifted over him for the first time since they’d sat.
Grant scrubbed his face with his hands. He’d hoped by coming to her office they could begin again on more sure footing. He hadn’t counted on Jessica barging in before he got there trying to cause trouble. “Jessica is a young and silly woman who I’ve known since she was born. She shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry if I put you in an awkward position.”
“On the contrary. I’m glad she mentioned you. Jessica gave me a lot to think about.” She took another deep breath before she placed her hand over his. “I’ve missed you this past week.”
The contact with her, the feel of her soft skin, rattled him. He slid his hand away from her touch. He needed to get this right. “I only did what you asked.”
“You’ve always behaved appropriately and taken my feelings into account.” Her slight frown became a tepid smile as the corners of her mouth canted upward. “But we were friends before we were anything else, and I miss that.”
He stood, his hands balled at his sides, barely keeping a lid on his temper. “That’s the thing. We haven’t become anything else. I had hoped to take our relationship beyond friendship, but you insist on hanging onto the past. I’ve bared my soul to you, but you can’t do the same. I can’t fight a ghost, Caro.”
She rose and faced his anger. “I’m making an effort, Grant. Life is coming at me at warp speed. You’ve asked me to see things from your perspective, and I’ve done so. So see things from mine for a moment.” She ticked off items on her fingers. “Since Valentine’s Day, I’ve taken off my engagement ring, my last gift from Michael before he shipped out. I’ve given up my apartment where we spent so much time together, quit my job where I thought I’d stay until retirement, and relocated five states away.” She brushed back her hair and took a breath. “I thought I could live in Lobster Cove alongside you and maybe rekindle the friendship we once had. I never expected my feelings toward you would get so complicated.”
“Well now, you don’t have to. I don’t need to be in your life ‘complicating’ things for you.” He curled his fingers into air quotes as he spat out the word. “I’ve had time to reassess, too, and I’m tired of you making things difficult on purpose.” He took a step away from the desk. “Mourning someone you love is difficult, I get that. To intentionally fill your life with conflict isn’t the way to recover. Especially not with me. People have been making things difficult for me my entire life. The last thing I need is to have a woman do so.”
“Grant, please. You can’t expect me to not feel anything ever again about Michael and about the life we had.”
He glanced her way, surprised to find tears in her eyes. Before the last of his resolve faded, he had to get out of the room. He’d always been a sucker for a woman’s tears. He backed away, his voice still with a hard edge. “I’ll stay out of your way from now on. I’m sure we can keep our lives separate with only a bit of effort.”
“I don’t wish for a life separate from you. Jessica’s lecture to me made me admit that to myself.” A tear slid down her face.
He controlled his impulse to caress her damp cheek. “And I don’t wish to constantly battle a ghost. You said Michael told you not to mourn him for too long and to continue your life if he didn’t come back from the battlefield. He hoped you wouldn’t be alone for the rest of your life. Why don’t you listen?” Grant took another step toward the door. “I can’t spend time with you but not have a deep relationship. Just being your friend isn’t good enough. We’re not kids anymore playing Spin the Bottle.”
She raised her mossy green eyes finally.
His heart nearly broke at the anguish he witnessed.
“You’re right. We’re no longer kids.”
He couldn’t control his impulse and leaned in to kiss her one last time. He needed to inhale her lovely floral scent. “Goodbye, Sweet Caroline.”
****
“Goodbye?” Caroline took a seat again, her body numb. She whispered his last words. The last tender words she’d ever hear from him. She’d still see him in the halls here at school or around town. Could she deal with seeing him but not touching him? Watching him with other women, possibly Jessica, who would take great pleasure in her discomfort? Because she had no doubt in her mind Grant would be with other women. Replacement women. He had grown into one magnificent, delectable man, able to capture the attention of any warm-blooded woman who might cross his path.
She brushed away the last of her tears. He’d only done what she asked. Taken a st
ep back from their relationship. If she didn’t care for the scenario rolling out in her mind like a bad movie, she alone could change the script. Except changing their relationship meant letting go of Michael and their life together. She would have to make Michael only a memory, packing him and what had been their life together into a pretty little box, and never reopening the lid. She may have taken off her ring, but she still had been engaged. Could she break from the past? Did she have the strength? What did she really want?
Right now, the results of the day made her tired since she’d been all over the map with her emotions. She’d been offered a full-time job with the school, been chastised by Jessica, got up close with Grant, touched him, and inhaled him, which she’d longed to do all week. She had been certain he wouldn’t ignore the sparks shooting from their joined hands.
But he had.
He backed out of the room. Backed out of her life.
Exactly what she’d wanted. Now, she had to drag herself home and still had a shift this evening at The Treasure Chest to get through. Her gaze refocused, and she picked up her purse and coat. She had plenty of time to ponder the next steps in her life. Right now, she had to force her legs to take the next steps home.
After a tasteless microwaved meal for dinner, she changed clothes into serviceable pants and a warm sweater. She tied her apron around her waist as she descended the stairs and then opened the door to the back of the shop. Her shoulders hunched when she spied Abbey, who glanced up.
Without saying anything, Abbey rose and enveloped Caroline in a big hug. “Whatever’s wrong can be fixed,” she whispered as she brushed a lock of hair from Caroline’s face.
Caroline attempted to laugh, but her throat constricted, and the sound emerged wobbly and weak. “How do you always do that? Zero right in on what’s happening. I’m not so sure this can be fixed, though, Abbey. We’re not talking about a skinned knee.”
Abbey took a step back but kept her hands on Caroline’s elbows. “Yet, in a way your description is perfect. You were wounded by Michael’s death and formed a scab over your heart. The time has come to rip off the scab and live again. Yes, you’ll bear a deep scar. But you can learn from the experience and grow.”
“I don’t have the strength. The scab’s been in place for a long time. I’ve gotten used to the pain.” Caroline rubbed a hand over her heart.
Abbey strode back to the desk without responding. Before she sat, she faced Caroline once again and pointed a finger. “Admit you’ve been more alive since you came to Lobster Cove than you were in Ohio.”
Caroline nodded and hung her head. “Yes, I’ve had fun here, working with you and Penny.”
“Working at The Treasure Chest hasn’t been all that’s given you enjoyment. Admit what’s really been happening. One of the big reasons for your fun has been Grant.”
Caroline glanced up and caught Abbey’s broad smile as she motioned to the back parking lot.
“I’ve seen you locking lips with him, and from my point of view, you were enjoying yourself.”
Caroline flushed as a vision of the last time she and Grant had kissed flitted through her mind.
Abbey chuckled and pointed to the other seat in the room. “So sit and fill me in.”
Taking a seat at the desk next to Abbey, Caroline relayed both the demise of her relationship with Grant and being offered a job by the school. She didn’t mention the encounter with Jessica. “But if I take the job at school, I’ll have to see Grant on a daily basis. See him with other women. The school’s not big enough to avoid him entirely.”
Abbey gathered her loose papers and tapped the edges on the desk to make them line up. She then placed them in a basket near the computer to be dealt with later.
Her movements were purposeful and slow, so Caroline waited, sensing she still had something to say.
She took a deep breath and stared across the space between them. “Or you can run.”
Caroline recoiled, the words stinging, and gasped.
“I’ve become really good at reading body language.” Abbey shrugged. “I’ve seen your struggle. I’d hoped, once Grant explained the why of his actions years ago, you could let yourself fall in love with him. You were headed down that path once upon a time. Instead, now you’re retreating, and that means running away from both Maine and Lobster Cove.”
“But what else can I do?” Caroline whispered, as the words clogged in her throat.
“Stay and fight through the pain.” Abbey rose along with her voice. “I’d hate to see you leave. To keep running away from life. Penny and I have always hoped you’d relocate here once you became an adult. Staying here means you need to work through things with Grant. I won’t take sides, and Grant’s been a good friend of ours for a long time. So, you’ll see him at more places than school.”
Caroline stood as well, her mind whirling. “Wow. So much for having a soft place to land, eh? If that’s your version of a pep talk, I’m glad we don’t have them too often.” She took a step toward the entrance to the shop floor. “I’d better get to work.”
Abbey placed a gentle hand on Caroline’s arm. “I don’t mean to be harsh, but sometimes a kick in the rear end is what’s needed to get a person headed in the right direction.”
“Consider me kicked then.” Caroline wrapped her arm around Abbey in a quick hug and gave her a tepid smile. She made her way from the back of the store forward, straightening the shelves as she progressed. By the time she got to the front, her body had finally stopped shaking.
Penny grinned when Caroline approached the front counter and the cash register. “So, judging from the raised voices in the office, I’ll bet Abbey gave you an earful?”
“An earful and a kick in my backside.” Caroline grinned for the first time all day.
“Yeah, she’s good at that.” Penny leaned over the counter. “You should have seen her ride my rear while I decided if I should let Del into my life.”
Caroline rolled her shoulders. “Obviously, her advice worked since your wedding is what started my roller coaster ride. But how did you react when she first brought up the subject?”
“Took me a while, but I finally listened instead of being stupid.” Penny straightened. “I advise you to do the same. Time to suck it up, Buttercup.” She pointed toward the card section. “The cards are a mess. You can start on those aisles. I’ve always found rearranging them into neat, orderly rows helps to put my mind in a similar state.”
Caroline headed toward the rows of cards, mulling over the advice her cousins had given her. There weren’t enough cards in the shop to straighten out her tortured mind.
Chapter Seventeen
A few grim days later, Grant left behind the city limits and thoughts of Caroline and drove south, his mind filled with anticipation of seeing his family. Even though they’d all grown up in Lobster Cove, Grant’s brothers, Harrison and Lincoln, found jobs outside the Cove after they graduated college. Harry landed in Portland where he’d taken a job as a radiologist in the local hospital, and Linc lived in Boston where he had become a financial planner. Even though Linc had been the last to graduate, he now had a wife, a townhouse, and a secure future. Because of their various business obligations, the brothers could only get together a few times a year.
This weekend provided the perfect opportunity. The roads were clear, and no late-winter snow showers were predicted. Linc had scored three tickets to the Boston Celtics home game at the TD Garden and his invitation provided Grant with a good reason to not show up at Penny and Del’s house to view the game on their wide-screen television. He could avoid Caroline if she decided to attend their regular gathering.
Grant stopped in Portland to refuel his SUV and to pick up Harry. Instead of Harry opening the door to his apartment, his girlfriend welcomed Grant inside. Grant had thought her a beautiful woman when he first met her last Thanksgiving, with her large brown eyes, freckles across her nose, and russet hair. The entire family gathered together for the day but given Harry’s trac
k record with women seeing her again, obviously comfortable in Harry’s place surprised Grant. “Hi, Maggie.” He leaned in to give her a hug and a peck on the cheek.
“Nice to see you again, Grant.” She brushed a hand down his arm. “Harry told me you almost took the high school team to state finals this year. Congratulations.”
“Thanks. Has he been treating you well?” Grant smiled, his voice as soft as honey. “If not, I’ll take him behind the woodshed again. We made more than a few trips there together when we were kids. He’s always been a troublemaker.”
Maggie brightened, her eyes sparkling. “I wouldn’t be here if he weren’t a gentleman. I’ll agree he’s a handful at times, but you and your father raised him well. No worries.”
Harry wandered into the living room then, halting all conversation between Grant and Maggie since she ran to Harry’s side for a few more precious minutes together.
Grant observed his brother’s obvious reluctance to part from his girlfriend. They made an attractive pair, the pale redhead and the light-brown-skinned man. Both were tall and striking. Grant stroked his aching chest. He could relate, although the difference between their two relationships could be seen with obvious clarity. Maggie encouraged Harry’s attention, and Caroline discouraged Grant’s. He wondered if she had been tipped off he would not be one of the crowd at Penny’s home today, so she could enjoy herself while watching the game.
Soon enough, Harry and Grant were settled in the SUV and back on the road heading toward Boston. Grant observed Harry’s relaxed posture, his aura of peace. “Do you have something to tell me, little brother?” Grant punched Harry lightly on the shoulder, teasing him in the way only an older brother could.
Harry flashed him an innocent grin. “What are you talking about?”
“Your woman. She’s been hanging around you for quite some time now. Hasn’t gotten tired of you yet and vice versa. How long have you been together? Six months? Got to be a record for you.” Grant prodded.
