“W-well, yes, I am. That’s wonderful you could help her, but showing up in church with her… She’ll—”
“She’ll be welcomed if you and Beth show the other women she isn’t tainted. And she isn’t. All she did at the saloon was serve drinks.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I asked her, and I can tell she’s innocent.” He thought of their shared passionate kisses and was glad he was the only one to have experienced them.
Ma scrutinized him, her dulling blue eyes searching his face. “You have feelings for Tessa?”
“Strong ones.” He smiled. He had very strong ones. So strong it took all his control the night before to not creep up the stairs and share his bed with her.
“Then I guess I better make sure the other ladies reach out to her in a Christian way.”
“That’s all I ask. So, you’ll plan to join us after services tomorrow?” He would have a meal with his family, one he’d pay for with his own hard-earned money.
“Yes. We’ll save you a seat at church.”
Van rose, kissed his ma’s forehead, and called into the other room, “Grace, see you tomorrow.”
The child raced into the kitchen and smiled broadly. “You bet.”
He hugged Ma when she stood and shoved his hat on his head. Tomorrow would be the dawning of a new life for him. He’d have his family back and if all went well he’d earn even more regard from Miss Tessa Harrison.
Chapter Nine
Tessa smiled at the man perusing the boots and wrapped an arm around her rumbling stomach. Van brought a basket of bread, preserves, and apples to the shop before leaving to visit his family. But he’d put the food upstairs, and she was down here waiting on the tenth customer this morning. Most had just come in curious to see what the new shop offered, However, she had sold three pairs of boots.
The door opened and a gust of cold wind entered along with Beth smiling and swinging a small basket in her hands.
From across the room Tessa could smell fried chicken and her stomach rumbled louder.
“Marvin, you know you aren’t going to buy anything so run along so Miss Harrison and I can eat lunch.” Beth hooked her elbow in the man’s and towed him to the door. When he was standing on the walk in front, looking a bit dazed, Beth closed the door and locked it.
“Van didn’t tell me to close for lunch.” Tessa was starting to wonder why she allowed herself to be bossed around by the tiny woman.
“I’m sure he’d want you to eat, and you can’t eat if people are in here.” Beth brushed past her and started for the back room.
Tessa raced around her and stopped, crossing her arms over her chest. “Where are you going?” She glared down into Beth’s china doll face.
She blinked her blonde lashes and smiled. “I’m not sitting on the floor to eat my lunch. I know Van has purchased furniture for the living quarters.”
Tessa left her night clothes folded on the pillow and her extra dresses hung on hooks in the living quarters. Van had insisted she move all her belongings up there this morning before he left. She couldn’t have Beth walk in and see she was also living up there even though they were sleeping with a floor between them.
“I really think we should unlock the door and sit here. I can bring another chair down.”
The hem of Beth’s brown wool skirt moved and the sound of tapping registered. “What are you and Van hiding upstairs?”
“Nothing. I just think since it is the second day of business we should stay open.” Gulping the prickling ball of dread down her throat, she hoped her tone didn’t sound as wishy-washy to Beth as it did to her.
“Why don’t you want me to go upstairs?” Beth narrowed her eyes.
“Fine. Go, I don’t care.” If the woman was going to be this insistent she might as well fess up.
Beth started around her and stopped, holding her sleeve in front of her nose. Patch sauntered out from the back room and slinked around her skirt.
“No! Get back!” She sneezed and dropped the basket as she frantically searched her pockets and finally came up with an embroidered hanky. “Cats make me sneeze. I can’t… I can’t stay.” Beth scurried to the door. “Bring the basket when you come to dinner tomorrow.”
A giggle of relief bubbled in Tessa’s chest. “I will and thank you for the food.”
She gathered the cat into her arms as Beth fumbled to unlock the door and rush out. Tessa rubbed her face against Patch.
“Thank you for scaring her off. I’m not ready for her or anyone to know how many of us are living in this building.” She picked up the basket and sat by the stove. Patch jumped from her lap to the workbench and sniffed each item she came to.
“I’m as interested in watching him make a boot as you are.” Tessa pulled back the cloth covering the basket and plucked out a piece of chicken.
The door opened and air whooshed around her ankles. A man who looked vaguely familiar wandered in. He wore a long oil coat and had his hat pulled low on his forehead.
She placed the chicken back in the basket and wiped her hands on the cloth. “May I help you?” She stood and approached the man.
He ignored her and wandered around the shop stopping briefly to look at the boots. “Where’s Donovan?” he asked not even glancing at her.
“Out. May I be of assistance?” The man made her nervous, fidgety.
“Tell him Crane was by to see him.”
Tessa sucked in air and stared at the man who killed her father. Before she could shove her surprise aside and dredge up her anger, he was gone. Her hands shook. Her head swam with hatred. Now she knew what he looked like, she’d be looking for him. He’d pay for taking her father from her.
She couldn’t eat, couldn’t even sit.
***
Van returned the wagon and his team to the livery. He told Brett about the change of plans of dinner after church and hurried through the falling snow to the shop. On the trip back to town, he’d mulled everything around. There was more to his being recruited to help with the bank robbery and more between Crane and Judge Spencer. He could feel it. He didn’t share Ma’s confidence that Pa was a softer more tolerable man. If he did, he’d discuss his thoughts with Pa and Brett after dinner tomorrow. But unsure if he could forgive Pa, Van wasn’t ready to start up a confidence with the man.
He opened the shop door. Tessa vigorously whisked the straw broom across the floor. Her bent head and jerky movements showed her agitation. Van crossed the room in four long strides.
“What’s wrong?” He captured her arms, stilling her motion. Her green eyes stared at him unseeing and full of hardness.
She shook out of his grasp, taking several steps back. Her glare stunned him. What had transpired while he was gone to put loathing in her eyes?
“He was here. Asked for you.” She held the broom between them like a weapon.
“Who was here?” Judging from the distance in her voice and the heat in her eyes, her feeling toward him had changed. But why?
“Crane. He walked in here, studied things, and said to tell you he was here. Why did he come here to see you? Are you … and he…”
“Damn! Why did he come here? I don’t want anything to do with the man.” He took two steps forward. “Did he hurt you?” He’d kill the man if he laid a hand on Tessa. The outlaw had caused her enough pain.
“Why did he want to see you?” She lowered the broom a touch, but the anger and hurt in her eyes said he’d have to watch his words and his actions until she realized he no longer had a connection with the man.
His chest ached to think she believed he would have any kind of an alliance with the man. “I don’t know. All I know is I don’t want him around you.” He took another step toward her and took the broom out of her hands. Her stomach growled. “Didn’t you eat?”
She shook her head.
“Run upstairs and eat. I’ll watch the shop.” He nodded to the back room. She hesitated, then picked up a basket by the stove and walked briskly out of
the room.
Why did Crane come here? Leave such a cryptic message? Walking into his store in broad daylight, who saw him? Van churned the thoughts over and over in his head the rest of the day and long into the night. Tessa didn’t come downstairs until after he’d crawled into the hard pallet on the floor of the storage room. He heard her light footsteps cautiously creep down the stairs and slip out the back door. He fought to stay in bed. He wanted to follow and make sure she was all right, but he also knew if she was still in a snit, an argument in the alley wouldn’t help his situation.
The door opened and she slipped in. He rose up on one elbow. “Is everything all right?”
Her footsteps halted. He stared at the dark shadow.
“Fine.” Her voice faltered. “I was just tired.”
He stood, moving through the darkness toward her. “I would never do anything to hurt you.”
“I-I know.”
His outstretched hands found her arms. She didn’t pull away. He drew her to his chest and embraced her. “All I want is for you to be happy.”
Her arms circled his waist and she squeezed, drawing their bodies even tighter together.
“I know. I-when he said who he was, if I’d had a gun at that moment I would have shot him.” She shivered. “I don’t like the way the hatred claimed me.” She nuzzled her head against his chest. Dampness penetrated his long johns, and he realized she was crying.
“Shh…” He tipped her head up. “Don’t cry over that man or the feelings he brought. You have a right to feel the way you do. Just don’t kill him. That’s making yourself no better than him.”
Her head nodded. He wished he dared turn on the kerosene lamp, but he didn’t want the deputy making nightly rounds to think something was wrong and find them embracing.
“Let me walk you up the stairs.”
“That isn’t necessary.” She started to pull away.
He held her against his side and started up the stairs. “Yes, it is.” His body had come to life the moment he touched her. The heat and yearning coursing through him battled with his good sense. He wanted one kiss and the best way to get it would be as he left her at her door.
They climbed the stairs side by side, his arm wrapped around her shoulders. At the top, he turned her to face him.
“I can’t wait another minute,” he whispered and covered her lips with his. Warm, soft, and even better than he remembered from their first kiss. Van tilted his head and deepened the kiss. Her arms circled his neck, and he drew her body against his. His hands roamed down her back, feeling each bump of her ribs and back bone, then over the slight curve of her backside. She wore only a flannel nightdress, giving him intimate access to the feel of her body.
She moaned and her lips parted, inviting him to enter. His tongue delved into the hot sweet recesses of her mouth. She mimicked his actions, following his tongue move for move. The heady sensation of her passionate advance pushed him past rationalization. He wanted her, needed her.
He picked her up and carried her to the bed. Her body stiffened and her lips pulled away.
When she started to fight him, he dropped her on the bed.
“Sleep tight,” he said through a constricted throat. His lead feet carried him down the stairs and back to his hard pallet. Exactly what he needed to dispel the passion from his body and realize, if he wanted to have Tessa in his life, he had to go about it with a sane head and court her.
***
Tessa tossed and turned all night and greeted the morning despondently. Why had she fought Van when it was clear he planned to fulfill the dreams she’d had every night since meeting him? Because even though he said he’d wait for you, your fear of commitment to one person and losing them has frozen you. Her body burned to feel his hands on her again. She’d reveled in his deep, hot kiss.
A knock on the door spun her from making the bed. “Yes?”
“I’ve brought breakfast if you’re ready. We only have an hour until church.” He didn’t sound put out. Her heart raced at his voice.
She crossed to the door and opened it. His clean shaven face smiled down at her. The gleam in his eyes said he didn’t hold a grudge about the night before.
“Come in. I was just tidying up.” She went back to the bed and finished tucking in the blankets.
When she faced the room, two plates and a plate of food sat on the table. Van poured milk into the tin cups.
“You don’t have to bring me all this food.” She sat in the chair he held out for her.
“I know.” He sat across from her, studying her.
Her face heated from his scrutiny. “Why are you watching me? I haven’t changed since yesterday.” Though inside she knew better. His kisses were all she could think about. Her body throbbed in places she knew were inappropriate, yet she had no control over.
“I want to make sure my actions last night didn’t…upset you.” His gaze drifted down to her lips before returning to her eyes.
“You didn’t upset me. I wanted to say…” She swallowed. How did she say she didn’t mind advances without sounding like a strumpet? “I’m not mad.”
He let out a long breath. “Good. Then eat. We’re meeting my family at church and dining with them at the hotel restaurant after.”
“What about our dinner with Beth and Brett?” She liked the idea of not dining with Beth. The woman would pry the truth out of her soon enough.
“I invited Brett to join us at the hotel with my family.”
Lightness in her chest sprung a smile on her lips. “Then you and your family have reconciled?” He must be delighted.
“Yes, well, Ma and my sister. Pa wasn’t there, but Ma said he was distraught after I left. I just can’t figure out why he never gave my letters to Ma.”
She placed a hand on his resting on the table. “Maybe he thought it would burden her heart if your letters were full of horrible things?”
“All he had to do was read them and see I’d grown up in there and learned my lesson.”
“You’ve said he was stubborn. Perhaps it took him some years to realize his mistake and then he didn’t know how to reconcile with you.” She watched the brief flicker of hope light Van’s eyes before being snuffed out.
Van’s sorrow had become her sorrow. She flinched at the knowledge. He had become her world in a short time. Tessa focused on her food and how he’d wheedled into her heart.
***
Van stepped into the church with Tessa on his arm. By now the town knew who he was. The distrust in their stares chilled as thoroughly and deeply as the bitter December wind blowing outside. Tessa’s steps faltered. He patted her hand in the crook of his arm and moved down the aisle to Ma’s smiling face. Seated beside her was Pa. He looked more than ten years older. His sunken eyes and wrinkled face cracked the layer of animosity Van had harbored toward the man.
Van stopped at the end of the pew and motioned for Tessa to scoot through in front of his family. Pa stood, looked him up and down and nodded his head. A wisp of a smile quivered on his lips. With a tear in his eye Pa wrapped his arms around Van. The embrace melted the rest of Van’s reserve.
“Pa.” His hoarse voice seemed to echo through the quiet church. Pa slapped him on the back and let him go. Van looked down at Ma. Her eyes glistened with tears, and she touched his arm as he moved on by and took his seat on the far side of Tessa, putting a barrier between her and the glaring woman on his right.
He tweaked Grace’s nose. “Hey, sis.” She smiled up at him and stared unabashedly at Tessa, who smiled down at her.
At this very moment he didn’t think life could get any better.
Judge Spencer turned from talking to the preacher and walked toward them. The hatred dilating Spencer’s eyes as his gaze landed on each member of the Donovan family and finally Tessa tightened Van’s muscles and burned his gut.
Chapter Ten
Van leaned back in his chair at the restaurant and patted his stomach. Good food, good friends, and family. That was all a man
needed. His gaze lingered on Tessa visiting with Ma. And a good woman. He loved the way her face lit up when she was happy. The glow went from her eyes all the way down her neck and he imagined clear to her toes.
“You gonna show us this shop I’ve heard about?” Pa asked, pulling Van’s attention from his thoughts of Tessa.
“Right now if everyone’s full.” Van slid his chair back and quickly pulled back Tessa’s. Her wide eyes glistened as she smiled at him. He extended his elbow, and she hooked her arm in his, drawing her shawl closer around her shoulders. Christmas was two weeks away. He’d keep Tessa indoors more until he could give her a new coat for Christmas. He knew she wouldn’t accept one any other way.
Pa and Ma and Brett and Beth along with Grace followed them out into the street and down the snow packed boardwalk to the shop. Tessa’s steps slowed. Her hesitation scraped at him like a burr in his socks. He unlocked the door and held her back as everyone filed into the building.
He stopped her from following. “What’s wrong?”
She glanced up at him with regret lingering in her eyes. “Beth was here the other day and wanted to see the upstairs, like she knew we were, well living under the same roof. I just… your mother…”
“When they go through the back room they’ll see my things, and when they’re upstairs they’ll see yours. I’m sure they won’t think anything other than what a gentleman I am to sleep on the floor.” And he hoped so for Tessa’s sake.
She didn’t appear any less nervous, but he ushered her into the shop before the others wondered what kept them.
Beth was telling them all about the curtains she made and how Tessa had been putting in long hours helping set the shop up.
“That’s true.” Van reached out taking Tessa’s shawl and moving her near the fire. He didn’t miss the raised eyebrows on his parents. “If not for Tessa, I wouldn’t be ready to sell boots and get on with the orders I need to fill.” He motioned for everyone to take off their coats. Gathering all the coats, he piled them on his pallet in the back room.
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