Jessica's Wish

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Jessica's Wish Page 5

by Marci Bolden


  “Mallory,” he said thoughtfully, “I love my daughter with every cell in my body, but there are times when her life—my life—would be easier if she weren’t disabled. I can’t deny I see that, that I know that. But she is disabled, and her disability has given her more strength and compassion than most adults I’ve ever met. I wouldn’t change her for anything. She brings so much happiness to this world, not just to me but to everyone who knows her. Jessica and Annie face challenges we could never fully understand. It’s okay to recognize that we wish things were different for them and for us, so long as we accept that things never will be different. Jessica will never not have Down, and Annie will never be the way she was before. What matters is that we help them live their lives to the best of their abilities so they can find all the happiness they deserve.”

  “I know that,” she whispered. “Sometimes I just don’t know how.”

  “You don’t always have to know, Mal, you just have to try. Your family has had a lot to deal with in a short time.”

  “You can say that again.” She put the book back in the box and flipped the top closed.

  “You know, I’m a graphic designer, too. We could use you at Dad’s company. We’re growing all the time.”

  She started shaking her head before he finished. “I appreciate that, Phil, but a big reason why I came back to Stonehill was to help Marcus with Mom’s agency. He may think he can handle it all alone, but I watched my mom work herself to the bone for years. He can’t run the business and care for Mom all by himself. It isn’t fair for me to expect him to. I did that for too long.”

  He put his hand to her arm, hating that she was being so hard on herself. “Hey, you are allowed to go out and live your life.”

  “I know that.”

  “Do you?” he pressed.

  She pulled back under the premise of moving the box she’d opened to another stack. He wasn’t sure if she was drawing away from his touch or subtly trying to get him to shut his mouth. Either way, he realized he’d probably pushed the supportive-buddy role too far.

  “Yeah. I do,” she stated firmly. “I’m not giving up on my art. I’m just putting it on the back burner for a while.” Turning to face him, she brushed her hands together before planting them on her hips. “Just until I get settled and can find my footing again.”

  He hesitated. The last thing he wanted to do was end their friendship before it began because he didn’t stop nudging when she clearly wanted him to, but so much was left unsaid. She was clearly struggling more than she wanted anyone to know. Like mother like daughter, if he guessed right.

  Instead of pressing the matter any further, he took a page from his father’s book of unwavering support for a stubborn woman. “If you need help,” he offered, “please let me know. I’m happy to do whatever you need to make this happen.”

  She smiled, a warm, genuine smile, and some of the shadows left her eyes, letting the light back in. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

  Chapter Four

  The following weekend was the deadline Annie had given Mallory. If she hadn’t unpacked, her mother was doing it for her. Despite Mallory being an adult with her own home, she had no doubt her mother would show up with her aunt Dianna to sort through all the boxes. She wasn’t having that. Instead, she caved and let Phil help her out. She’d already shared her deepest darkest secret, so she didn’t see the harm.

  As Saturday morning rolled into afternoon, Mallory rested her hands on her hips and slowly turned around. “I don’t remember this room being so big.”

  Phil took in the open space with amazement as if he’d just seen her living area for the first time. Though the house was small, the open concept made the space bright and airy. Between the two of them, they’d filled two bookshelves in her office with comics, set out her photos and an array of tchotchkes, and rearranged her furniture to best suit the room.

  “Holy cow,” he said with a teasing tone. “Your rental is the TARDIS.”

  Her heart leaped in her chest as excitement rolled through her. Spinning, widening her eyes as she stared at him, she gasped dramatically. “Did you just make a Doctor Who joke?” She pointed at him before he could deny the accusation of making a reference to one of her many sci-fi favorites. “You did. You just implied that my house is bigger on the inside than the outside. You are a nerd! I knew it.”

  He actually blushed a little. “I may have seen a few episodes.”

  “Favorite Doctor?”

  He shrugged, but when she cocked her brows at him, he grinned. “I’m old school. I always liked the Fourth Doctor.”

  “Tom Baker. Good call. I have to say, I enjoy the newer series a bit more myself. I know a lot of Whovians would disagree, but…” She let her words trail off when his eyes glazed over. Dismissing his boredom with a wave of her hand, she let the topic drop. “Amateur.”

  Blinking as if his neurons had finally fired, he sighed. “You have to remember who my mother was. Television didn’t play a large role in my childhood. We crashed in the guest house of this doctor for one summer while my mom was nannying for them. It was by the ocean. I would have stayed there forever. I learned to surf that summer. And I watched a lot of TV, even a little Doctor Who.”

  “Well. Lucky for you, I happen to own the entire collection to get you caught up. Start to present.”

  He opened his mouth as if he were going to disagree but then seemed to think better of it. He peered out the big window. “Is that Annie and Marcus?”

  Mallory’s heart dropped to her stomach. The last thing she needed was her mom catching Phil in her living room. Not that her friendship with Phil was a secret, but the other last thing Mallory needed was her mother getting the wrong idea about them. Not that there was a wrong idea. But… A quick glance confirmed the car pulling to the curb in front of her house was Marcus’s. “Shit.”

  Facing Phil, Mallory debated having him sneak out the back door like she had done once to her high school boyfriend. Her mom had come home from work for lunch during summer break, and Mallory had just worked up the courage to let her boyfriend take off her shirt. She would have gotten away with sneaking him in while her mom was at work if only he’d grabbed his shoes on the way out. Mallory tried to be casual, but Annie sniffed out the evidence like a cadaver dog. She scooped up the boy’s shoes, eyed her daughter, and Mallory broke down in a fit of tears and hiccups.

  After that dreadful episode, she’d been forced to spend every summer day and after-school hour at O’Connell Realty. She’d learned all about folding brochures and filing listings. Her mother had paid her, so her time wasn’t exactly wasted, but she’d still felt imprisoned. She’d never been trusted to be home alone again after a pair of men’s shoes had spontaneously appeared in their house.

  “Men are only after one thing, Mallory Jane,” Annie had stated that day. “And you’re too young to give it.”

  Mal was an adult now. There was no need to rush a shoe-less Phil out the back door and hope her mother didn’t catch on. She had every right to have a man in her house. Her house. Even so, her stomach knotted with the same fear she’d felt as Donny Snider had run away in his bare feet. Looking at Phil, she lifted her hands as if to soothe him. “Just be cool.”

  He lifted his brows in question. “Why wouldn’t I be cool?”

  “I mean… Remember how you said your mom had added me to your pool of potential significant others?” She lifted her shoulders high in an apologetic shrug. “You’re about to get tossed into my pool. Probably head first. And weighed down so you can’t escape. My mom really likes you. Well…your kid. You’re just part of the Jessica package.”

  He shrugged, much as she had. “Hey, you could do worse.” Smiling, he called down the hall to the office where they had set Jess up with colored pencils and a sketchbook. “Annie’s here, Punk.”

  Fast as the Flash, the girl ran through the living room and out the front door. Mallory and Phil watched her reach the car just as Marcus was helping Annie out. Jessica to
ok Annie’s hand, talking a mile a minute, and guided her into the house, leaving Marcus behind. Mallory had some strange realization, something about how while having Annie as a mother was a bit like having the Terminator standing over her shoulder most of her life, the woman had so much love and protectiveness inside her. She would be a wonderful grandmother. Especially to Jessica, since they had such a strong bond already.

  The thought spread through Mallory’s chest like the first big gulp of bourbon, warming her from the inside out before settling in her stomach with a punch.

  She physically shuddered, forcing the thought away. She’d never really considered that she might want a family someday, but the image before her seemed to have kicked a part of her she had never acknowledged existed. Pushing the odd thought far, far from her mind, she faced Phil. “I give Mom five minutes before she’s trying to get me alone so she can ask why you’re here.”

  He scoffed. “No way she’s going to make it that long. I give her less than two minutes.”

  She opened the timer on her watch, ready to press the button to make it start as soon as Annie walked in the door. “Loser buys pizza. And…go.”

  Jessica pushed the front door open, saying, “Do you know that Mallory has comic books?”

  “Wait. What?” Mallory whispered. “Why is she ratting me out?”

  “Like a gazillion of them,” Jessica continued.

  “Oh, she can’t keep secrets,” Phil said under his breath.

  “Now you tell me.”

  Annie walked in, but Mallory doubted the questions in her eyes were about the aforementioned comic book collection. Her mother was staring at Phil, obviously wondering why he was there. Crap. No way she was going to make it five minutes before asking what she was clearly trying to sort out. With any luck, Jessica would distract her longer than two minutes.

  However, with pizza riding on this bet, Mallory decided not to leave it up to luck.

  “I’m so glad you’re here,” she said to her parents, who cast curious glances at each other. Okay, that might have been laying it on a little thick. She never made a big deal about them popping in. Gesturing around, she tried to turn their focus on the living room. “Check this out, huh?”

  “Nice,” Annie said and then nailed her daughter down with that mind-piercing stare of hers. “Why don’t we let Marcus catch up with Phil while you show me the rest.”

  Damn it.

  Phil grabbed Mallory’s wrist and chuckled as he checked the timer. “Less than a minute.”

  Jerking her arm away from his grasp, she scowled. “Nobody likes a braggart.”

  Annie lifted her brows and smiled, and Mallory knew the battle was lost. Might as well come clean now.

  “Phil and Jessica offered to help me unpack without judgmental commentary on how many possessions I own. Mom.”

  Holding her hands up, as if to show her innocence, Annie said, “I never said a word.”

  “You might have said one or two,” Marcus countered.

  Annie elbowed him while Mallory thanked him for his support.

  “Come see,” Jessica insisted, tugging at Annie’s hand.

  Mallory wanted to protest, but the proverbial cat had been released from the bag. Annie continued to eye Mallory, obviously more interested in her company than in the books Jessica wanted to show.

  “Remember that you can’t take the comics from the bags,” Phil warned.

  Jessica rolled her eyes. “I know, Daddy. Mallory told me the rules.”

  Marcus opened his mouth. He was more discreet than her mother, but he wasn’t afraid to pry into her life. Now that Annie was out of the way, she had no doubt that he was going to start pushing his own brand of nosiness on her.

  “Phil needs help hanging curtains,” Mallory stated before her stepdad could say a word. “I’m too short.”

  Give Marcus a chore, and he would be thoroughly distracted until it was done. He turned, looking at the rods still sitting next to the window. “I can do that.” However, even with a distraction dangling like a carrot, he nodded his head toward the hallway where Jessica had dragged Annie. “You go answer your mother’s questions so I don’t have to hear her hashing this out all night.”

  “Fine.” Leaving the men to their task, Mal headed to her office. She was already thinking of ways to distract Annie, but that process came to an immediate halt. When she was a kid, fascinated by comic books, her mom had dismissed those conversations with a pat on the head and a few muted comments as she focused on her work. She was always focused on her work.

  As a single mother building a business and raising a child, she never seemed to have a lot of time for Mallory’s hobbies. Annie had sacrificed a lot to make a secure home and future for Mallory. She’d been angry and resentful of her mom’s business when she was younger. She’d spent a lot of time as a kid feeling like she was second to a bunch of houses, but she grew up to understand her mother had been fighting an uphill battle for years to keep a roof over their heads.

  As she rounded the corner, Mallory was completely taken aback. All those years that she’d thought her mother hadn’t heard her disappeared as Annie explained to Jessica why it was so important to not touch the pages. The comics were collector’s editions; fingerprints and creases made them less valuable. The bags protected them and kept them safe. But the zinger was when she explained that Mallory had been collecting the comics since she was a teenager and they were really important to her.

  Mallory hadn’t realized Annie had known. She’d kept her ongoing love of the books a secret because she felt like she should have outgrown the childish fascination. Leaning against the doorjamb, she crossed her arms and listened until Jessica noticed her.

  “This is so cool, Mal,” she said. “I’m going to have a comic book collection someday, too. And a room to keep them all in.”

  “Well, you’d better get started,” Mallory said. “It takes a long time to get this many.” She pushed off the doorframe and walked into the office. “I’m going to a really cool event next weekend with comic books. Maybe you could ask your dad if you can go with me.”

  Jessica widened her eyes and drew a gasping breath. She was gone in a blink, screaming for Phil as she ran down the hall.

  Turning her focus to her mother, Mallory chuckled. “I don’t think she’s going to leave him much choice.”

  “Not likely.” Putting the book back on the shelf, Annie lifted her brows and waited.

  Mallory moaned. “Don’t start, Mom.”

  “I didn’t.”

  “You did. Internally,” Mallory clarified.

  Annie smiled. “Phil’s nice.”

  Heaving a dramatic sigh, much like those that Jessica loved to give her father, Mallory pointed out, “All my friends are nice. Even the ones who are boys.”

  “You’ve got nice friends. But Phil is the only one here, isn’t he?”

  This wasn’t the end of Annie’s inquisition. Mallory wasn’t foolish enough to believe that, but she did hope that she’d be tactful enough to let it drop for now. “I’ve got some clothes to hang. Want to help?”

  Phil tossed the crust of his third slice of pizza onto his plate. “This was probably the best-tasting pizza I’ve ever had.”

  “Don’t rub it in,” Mallory warned.

  Jessica didn’t respond. Mallory had spread a blanket on the floor in front of the television and given her the big slice of pizza in the box, despite Phil’s protest that she’d never eat that much. Her eyes had been glued to the television ever since Phil had agreed she could watch an old live-action He-Man film from Mallory’s movie collection…the size of which very nearly rivaled her comic books.

  “You’ve created a monster.” He nodded toward his daughter. “She’s going to pester you to death about all this comic book stuff.”

  “There are worse things to be pestered about. I’m glad she likes them.”

  He had to admit this was a heck of a better preoccupation than some of the other things Jessica got fixated on. M
aybe he’d be lucky and this would be the thing to finally break the My Little Pony streak that had been going for far too long as far as he was concerned. He remembered seeing the little pastel-colored horses during his childhood, but he hadn’t expected them to come back around for his own child to obsess about.

  “So about this comic book convention—” he started.

  “I can take her if you don’t want to go,” Mallory offered. “I mean, if that’s okay with you. I promise to keep an eye on her. She won’t leave my side.”

  “I’ll go.”

  She widened her eyes, obviously stunned by his statement. “Really?”

  “Yeah. Really. It might be fun.”

  Her smile grew and that light filled her eyes again. He really liked when she got excited. She practically glowed. In a way, her excitement reminded him of Jessica’s. When Jessica was happy, she couldn’t hide it. Mallory was that way. He liked that about her.

  “Do you have a costume?” she asked.

  “A…a costume?”

  “Yeah.” She put her plate down, dragged her hands over her jeans, and snatched up her phone.

  While she tapped the screen, Phil fought the urge to tell her to use napkins. He’d been trying to pound that into Jessica’s head for so long, the words almost slipped before he caught them. He managed to swallow them down. Mallory was a grown-up, and if she wanted to ruin her clothes with greasy pizza stains, that was her right.

  Turning her smartphone to him, she said, “See? Everyone dresses up.”

  “I want to be a My Little Pony,” Jessica announced. Clearly her focus hadn’t been as singular as Phil had thought.

  “You’ll be the best pony ever,” Mallory announced.

  Jessica broke her hypnotic gaze from the television long enough to smile at Mallory but then went back to eating and watching He-Man save the universe.

 

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