A small frown touched Kenrick’s brow. Then he was smiling encouragingly. “Tell me about it,” he invited.
Fifteen minutes later Kenrick had decided that his wife was truly the most remarkable woman he’d ever met. She had begun her story haltingly, as though expecting each word she murmured to be met with disbelief. And so he had been extremely careful to keep his expression nonjudgmental, even when he was imagining that he had his hands around her parents’ throats, choking each of them to within an inch of their lives.
Not that Elizabeth had even once denigrated her parents, Kenrick realized. On the contrary, she had consistently tried to imbue the hardships of her childhood with humor, laughing as she described her youthful missteps while attempting to keep up with the daily demands of a crumbling estate. And her eyes had positively glistened with gratitude when she told of the help she had received from Mattie and the vicar and her many neighbors.
But Kenrick was quite capable of reading between the lines, and he could easily imagine the fears, uncertainties, and frustrations that a bright and sensitive child like Elizabeth must have suffered when her most earnest efforts earned her nothing but condemnation and disappointment from her parents. That she had succumbed only to an occasional stutter now struck him as near miraculous, and he could only feel ashamed of himself for having reacting with so much bitterness and distrust when confronted with his father’s and his first wife’s transgressions. That he in no way deserved Elizabeth’s approbation was clear to him, but he very much hoped he could earn not only her approval but also her love.
There! He had at last admitted the truth to himself. He was, indeed, falling in love with Elizabeth. And the thought, surprisingly, no longer terrified him. It was, in fact, rather comforting. He could envision a wonderful and fulfilling future with Elizabeth, a future filled with love and with trust and with laughter. A future that included children who would again make the halls of Oak Groves ring with the clatter of children at play.
And they would be good parents, he and Elizabeth. They would somehow avoid the mistakes of his father and of Elizabeth’s parents, and they would surround their children with approval and with caring, with laughter and with love.
“Is something wrong?” Elizabeth asked, her eyes dark with concern. Only then did Kenrick realize that she had stopped talking and that he had been staring off into space, lost in his lovely daydreams of tomorrow.
“Nothing,” he whispered, reaching to gently smooth the tiny furrows from her brow and then slide his hand down to cup her chin. “Nothing at all,” he murmured, lifting his forefinger to softly trace the outline of her trembling lips. “On the contrary, everything is perfect.”
Slowly Kenrick lay back on the grass, gently pulling Elizabeth with him so that she ended up cuddled in his arms. Then, still moving slowly and carefully, he touched her lips with his own, very softly at first and then, when she didn’t pull back, with increasing ardor. A few seconds later Elizabeth parted her lips as though to welcome the deepening of their kiss, and Kenrick groaned softly.
Passion, deeper and more consuming than any he’d ever known, flared and spread throughout his body. His wife’s responses, while unpracticed, were obviously sincere, and they affected him more potently than even the most accomplished efforts of any of the proficient mistresses he had kept over the years.
“Elizabeth,” he murmured softly, breaking the kiss to bury his face in the curls beside her ear. “My beautiful, wonderful Elizabeth.” Pulling back so that he could look into her face, he was delighted to realize that she was smiling, her eyes bright with passion and with pleasure.
A minute later, he had adeptly unfastened the top buttons of her habit and was kissing the enticing hollow at the base of her throat. Her moan of passion and the increased pace of her breathing sent sparks of desire racing to his head, where they exploded with the combined force of all of the fireworks that had ever been set off at Vauxhall Gardens.
“Kenrick! Kenrick! Stop! Oh please stop!”
It took half a minute for Elizabeth’s whispered words to filter into Kenrick’s brain and make their way into his consciousness. A second later he realized she was pushing frantically against his chest. It required some effort, but he managed to control his breathing enough to speak in a comforting tone. “Never be afraid of me, my dearest. I won’t hurt you. Just relax and—”
Elizabeth interrupted him in a hissed whisper. “Someone’s coming. Listen!”
Kenrick summoned enough composure to stop and listen. Elizabeth was right. Someone was coming. A rustling of the tall grass was accompanied by the sound of footfalls.
Suppressing a moan, Kenrick quickly began attempting, with fingers that were not quite steady, to close the buttons he had loosened. With a scarlet face and an impatient gesture, Elizabeth pushed his hands away and finished the chore herself. She had just sat up when Apollo bounded out of the grass. Billy followed closely behind him.
“Oh my,” Elizabeth murmured. “My usual morning companions must have come in search of me when I didn’t return from my ride at the usual time.” Billy was grinning happily as he approached, but his grin quickly faded.
Kenrick didn’t set out to frighten the lad, but he couldn’t completely erase the strain from his voice. “What are doing here?” he asked quickly. “Is something wrong at Oak Groves?”
Biting his lip, Billy slowly shook his head. Tears began pooling in his eyes.
“No doubt Apollo followed me,” Elizabeth interjected hastily. “And probably Billy merely trailed along.”
“Then Billy must take Apollo back to the stables,” Kenrick said. “They can share your company with me for one morning.”
After an apologetic glance for Elizabeth, Billy scooped Apollo up and started running back across the meadow. Within seconds, the two of them had disappeared into the woodland.
Kenrick watched them go and then blew his breath out in a long sigh. Even without looking at Elizabeth, he could feel her disapproval as though it were a tangible thing, and he realized she was too innocent to comprehend the extent of the sexual frustration that had caused him to snap at Billy. He also realized that the mood was broken. Elizabeth would never respond to his lovemaking again that morning, and so he did the only thing he felt he could do to salvage the situation.
“I’m sorry, Elizabeth,” he said, risking a glance at his puzzled but irate wife. “I shouldn’t have snapped at Billy as I did.”
“Then why did you?” Elizabeth asked.
If she had been less innocent, he could have answered her truthfully: Because fireworks were going off in my head and the blood in my veins had turned to fire. Instead he shrugged. “I was not pleased to have our morning interrupted.”
“Nor was I,” Elizabeth surprised him by saying. He was beginning to nourish hopes for rekindling their lovemaking when Elizabeth spoke again. “In fact, I had been waiting for an opportunity to ask you a question.”
Kenrick swallowed his disappointment and forced a smile. “What was that, my dear?”
Elizabeth hesitated and bit her lip. “It regards something Gerald told me about you.”
His wife’s reference to his hated cousin was one too many disappointments for Kenrick’s composure that morning. A suspicion, tiny but insidious, crept into his mind. He could not help but wonder if Elizabeth had been thinking of another man while she was responding to his kisses in much the way Paulina must have done when they had made love.
“You need not tell me what Gerald said.” Kenrick clambered to his feet. “You can safely assume that anything Gerald ever told you about me is a lie.” He held out his hand, prepared to pull Elizabeth to her feet. “Come. It’s time to return to Oak Groves.”
“No thank you,” she said, dropping her gaze and ignoring his gesture. “You go ahead without me. I want to stay here for a while.”
“As you wish, madam,” Kenrick replied, withdrawing his hand. With a swift bow, he turned and hurried to mount Solomon. He did not look back as he rode aw
ay.
* * *
Elizabeth waited until the sounds of Kenrick’s departure had faded before she succumbed to the sobs she had been suppressing. Her fairytale morning had turned into a nightmare, and she was not sure she understood why.
She didn’t really blame Kenrick for growing irritated with Billy. After all, she had not been best pleased herself by the interruption. She had been relishing her husband’s kisses and even his more intimate embraces. No, she didn’t blame him for growing a bit short with Billy.
It was Kenrick’s reaction to her mention of Gerald that puzzled Elizabeth. His irritation had appeared to burgeon into full-fledged fury when she attempted to ask him about Gerald’s accusation. Could it be that Kenrick had guessed what she intended to ask because he was guilty of everything Gerald had said about him? If that were the case, he would, of course, resent Elizabeth’s attempt to question him.
She blinked back fresh tears as she felt her hopes for a true marriage disintegrating. If Kenrick wouldn’t even discuss Gerald’s accusations with her, he left her little choice but to believe Gerald, much as she regretted the necessity. But on one point she was determined. Never would she bear Kenrick’s children if there was a possibility he might feel the same antipathy toward them as her own parents had felt toward her.
After all, no child was perfect, and Elizabeth would rather remain childless than risk exposing her offspring to even one parent who was incapable of loving the whole child, including its imperfections.
The sun was directly overhead before Elizabeth felt composed enough to remount and ride back to Oak Groves. She rode slowly through the forest, hoping the beauty around her would help ease the aching emptiness that had settled over her with the realization that she and Kenrick would likely never learn to trust each other. She very much feared that he would always wonder if she and her parents had connived to entrap him, and she would always wonder if he secretly loathed imperfection.
Her head was aching and her eyes burning with unshed tears when she approached the stables. Eager to avoid even casual conversation with anyone, especially her husband, she quickly turned her horse over to a groom and slipped in a side entrance to the house. She hurried up to her chamber, thankful that she could change out of her riding clothes without the assistance of her maid. After slipping into a dressing gown and splashing water on her face, she forced herself to sit down at the dressing table and pick up her hairbrush. Minutes later, she was still sitting and staring dejectedly at her reflection when Mary knocked on the door and then asked to join her.
“I have been going over the day’s post, my dear,” Mary announced with a cheerful smile, dropping into a satin-covered chair to watch as Elizabeth began brushing the tangles and a few odd pieces of grass from her hair. “As you know, I have been looking forward to introducing you to several of my old friends who were in the country earlier this summer. They are returning to London now and are writing to urge us to join them. Would you be very disappointed if we moved back to Kenrick House soon?”
With as bright a smile as she could muster, Elizabeth responded immediately. “I would be delighted to return to London, Mary. In fact, the sooner, the better.”
Chapter Eighteen
Back in London, the hurried, frantic pace of the city seemed a perfect complement to Elizabeth’s frenzied emotions, which persisted in flitting about like a bird that had come down the chimney and found itself trapped in a strange room. And trapped, Elizabeth decided, described very well her own feelings.
What she wanted more than anything in the world was to believe that Gerald had lied to her. But she couldn’t imagine why he would bother, nor could she understand why Kenrick refused to discuss his cousin with her.
The task before her, she had come to realize, was to force her heart to listen to the dictates of her mind. Her mind, after all, was not so easily influenced as her heart. It did not start fluttering each time she heard her husband’s voice, nor did it persist in accelerating wildly every time he smiled at her.
Her mind at least was consistent in its demands that she convince her heart not to trust Kenrick lest their children someday pay the price for her misjudgment. Unfortunately, as she was learning to her dismay, her heart persisted in believing that Kenrick was the only man with whom she could ever find true happiness.
Elizabeth’s difficulties were compounded by the fact that Kenrick had seemed intent on charming her since their return to London. He greeted her each morning at the breakfast table with a cheerful smile and an invitation to join him for his morning ride. Elizabeth was finding it more difficult each day to refuse him. So far she had managed to find some excuse not to go, fearing that the more time she spent in his company, the more enamored with him her uncooperative heart would become.
They had been back in town for two weeks when Elizabeth began experiencing twinges of guilt. After all, as her heart insisted upon pointing out, Kenrick was trying very hard to appease her. He even managed to maintain a sunny facade during Gerald’s frequent visits. However, Elizabeth was becoming increasingly aware that Kenrick’s animosity toward Gerald was growing daily. She could feel his suppressed tension whenever Gerald called, and she had begun to fear that Kenrick’s anger would reach a breaking point soon.
On the other hand, she wondered if perhaps she would reach a breaking point first. Keeping Kenrick out of her thoughts would have been much easier, she was convinced, had he not insisted on accompanying her and Mary to every social function they attended. As an escort, of course, he was all that a lady could desire—unfailingly punctual, polite, and attentive. In fact, despite her mixed feelings, Elizabeth was especially pleased that he would be by her side for the event coming up on this particular evening.
The Duchess of Elldon’s ball would be Elizabeth’s first, and, according to Mary, it promised to be a sad crush. Elizabeth could not help but wonder if people would be staring at her, whispering conjectures behind their hands about the simpleton who had married the Marquess of Kenrick.
“Nonsense,” Mary had exclaimed when Elizabeth confided her fears. “Do you not realize, child, that your and Kenrick’s marriage was a nine-day wonder? The gossips have long since found more juicy tidbits to chew on. Besides, one look at your lovely face would prove to even the slowest wit that Jeremy had reason to marry you for your attributes rather than for any supposed deficiencies.”
Although Elizabeth had been far from convinced by Mary’s reasoning, she did have to admit, having completed her toilet in preparation for the ball, that she would never have dreamed that a particularly flattering ball gown could enhance her appearance so drastically.
The gown Elizabeth had chosen to wear to the Elldon’s ball was a filmy silk with a high waist and tiny puffed sleeves embellished with seed pearls. Although relatively simple, the gown was cut low enough to call attention to Elizabeth’s high bosom without appearing unladylike, while the soft green fabric brought out the auburn highlights lurking in her newly cropped hair.
“My dear, you look absolutely beautiful,” Mary exclaimed, hurrying into Elizabeth’s chamber after the very slightest of knocks. “I am pleased to see that you are ready, for Jeremy is no doubt waiting for us in the drawing room. Now, dearest, stand still for just one moment, because I have something for you. I am delighted that you have chosen to wear your green gown tonight because it will be perfect with these—the Kenrick emeralds.”
Elizabeth was already shaking her head as Mary opened the mental clasp on a leather-bound box and lifted the lid. The light from a brace of candles was instantly reflected in thousands of green facets lying against a bed of white velvet. The emeralds, dozens of them, were interspersed with diamonds in gold settings that formed a necklace, bracelet, and a large pin.
“I could not possibly—” Elizabeth began, tearing her gaze from the glittering stones to look into Mary’s dancing eyes.
“Of course you can,” Mary interrupted. “As the latest Kenrick bride, you have every right to wear the Kenrick emeral
ds. Jeremy would wish it, I am sure.”
Elizabeth was less certain that her husband would want her to wear the Kenrick estate jewelry, but once she had allowed her mother-in-law to fasten the necklace about her neck and nestle the pin among her curls, she could not bear to remove them. The realization that a sophisticated and seductive woman was staring back at her from her mirror was simply too tempting to be denied.
“Very well,” Elizabeth agreed with a happy sigh, unaware that the newly born confidence shining in her eyes was more intriguing than even the contrast of dark emeralds lying against her white skin. She turned from her mirror, her shoulders a little squarer than usual, her chin a bit higher. “I am ready,” she said, a tiny smile lighting her face.
* * *
Kenrick glanced into the drawing room mirror for perhaps the dozenth time while waiting to escort his wife and mother to the Elldon ball. Yes, his cravat was still perfect, his hair still in place, his jacket still unwrinkled. How he wished the ladies would hurry. He very much looked forward to spending the evening with Elizabeth. He was well aware that he had not regained her trust since his distressing behavior that morning beneath the willows at Oak Groves, despite being on his best behavior. He also feared that Gerald’s frequent visits were not helping his case. Gerald, he knew, would do him harm in any way possible.
Making a wry face at himself in the mirror, Kenrick silently cursed himself for his stupidity in refusing to allow Elizabeth to question him about Gerald. And since that morning, she had carefully avoided spending enough time alone with him to allow him an opportunity to raise the subject himself. Perhaps tonight after the ball he would go to her chamber. Not that he intended to force his attentions on a reluctant wife, of course, but perhaps he could convince her to confide in him, to tell him what Gerald had said about him. Perhaps, if he could allay her fears, they might even—
“We are ready, my dear.” Mary’s voice sounded from the doorway. Kenrick, smiling brightly, turned from his introspection to greet his mother and Elizabeth. His smile quickly faded while his breath caught in his throat as he gazed in bemusement at the vision his wife presented this evening.
A Simple Lady Page 18
