by Abigail Agar
He knew that there was some inheritance riding on this, but that did not trouble him. It was not his inheritance and not his problem. He had always wanted to marry for love, and that had not changed.
There was no love to be found here.
Mary was very beautiful, there was no denying that. Her hair was lovely; her face was incredibly pleasant to look at, and she had soft, touchable skin ... but her insides did not match the beauty of her outsides, and that was all that mattered.
“So, Mary,” he said loud enough to grab her attention. If she wished to be impolite, then he would too. “Please, tell me what it is that you do.”
Her face flamed as both men turned to look at her. Mary had not expected to be questioned, and she was not sure what to say. What did she do? She had no real interests, no passions, no work to speak of. Some Ladies rode horses, but it was pointless to go with that lie. She needed to say something to make her seem interesting.
“I erm, I have been helping my sister, actually.” She coughed awkwardly. “My sister is starting a campaign to help get better living conditions for the working classes, and I am helping her with that. It is ... it is something that I feel very passionate about.”
It was not all lies, surely that was something? Mary still felt uncomfortable, though, and it showed in her body language.
“I see,” Edmund replied with a smirk. He could tell this was something that she plucked out of the air. “That does sound fascinating. Please, tell me more.”
Mary cringed. She did not know what else to say. She parted her lips a couple of times as if something were about to come out, but of course, there was nothing but silence. An agonising silence that seemed to go on for days.
“I think we have had enough here,” Walter finally interjected as he realised this was not quite going as expected. “Shall we take a break here, think some things through, then start up communication at another time?
“Yes,” Edmund agreed, relieved.
“I think so,” Mary also said, feeling much better now that she was about to escape. It was utterly apparent that there was nothing but dislike coming from both parties, so she did not feel that she needed to fear anymore. “Thank you for your visit, Your Grace, it has been a ...” She paused for just a beat. Barely noticeable to the naked ear, but Edmund heard it. “Pleasure.”
“Oh, the pleasure is all mine.” Still, he did not offer his hand, so Mary did not either. “I am sure I will see you again soon.”
As Walter walked Edmund to the door, Mary let out a deep sigh of relief. That was far quicker than she expected, and she was so glad that it was over.
“How do you feel now?” Daisy asked from behind her, making Mary jump. She had almost forgotten that she was not alone. “Are you happier now that you have met the man?”
Mary gave Daisy a smile. “Much better, actually. I am now very sure that there will be no wedding.”
“Oh.” Unexpectedly, Daisy’s face fell. “Does that mean you shall lose the home? Do you think it might be time for us to look for new jobs? After all, the new house owner might not wish to keep us.”
Mary’s body boiled; she had not thought about that at all. She had only been concerned with how this arrangement affected her life and her future. Charlotte was wrong. There were other people that could be affected by what she did next. A whole houseful of people, the sort of people she had just pretended to care about the welfare of.
“Well, I do think I shall keep the house if the Duke does not wish to marry me,” Mary replied with a little uncertainty. “I have not spoken to Walter about the finer details of things, but I will.” She reached out and touched Daisy’s arm softly. “I shall ensure that no matter what happens next, you will keep your job anyway.”
Daisy looked up at Mary gratefully through her eyelashes. “What you said to the Duke about the working classes was very touching.” She paused thoughtfully. “Most people assume that the poor are a parasite; they forget that we are hungry too.”
Mary blushed, recalling Charlotte’s recollection of her husband’s words that matched that exactly. “Oh, well, I am sure that is not true ...” she tried to argue, but it was fruitless. “But yes, I do think it is very important to ... to care about rights.”
Mary felt terrible. She did not mean to lie. Maybe this was something that she did need to think about in the future. Of course, she needed to sort out her own mess first, especially when it affected lots of other people around her.
Chapter 5
“Uh oh.” Iris smiled to herself as she heard her son storming through the house. “Am I to understand that your meeting with Lady Roberts did not go well today?”
Edmund’s face was one of pure fury. He could barely contain the rage that coursed through his body. He had gone to speak with Mary because his mother had told him that he should and also because he held a lot of respect for Lord Roberts, but now he utterly regretted it. She had wound him up so badly he wanted to yell out in temper.
“No, it did not go well,” he growled. “It did not go well at all.”
Iris stood up and guided her son into the living room where they could both sit and talk properly. She knew that Edmund would not like being pushed into a corner when it came to marriage; she felt certain that he would be closed off when it came to meeting this Lady, but this was a stronger reaction than she expected.
“Please, Edmund, tell me what happened.”
“I asked around about her first,” he raged as he paced up and down the kitchen. “And I learned that she has a reputation for being standoffish and rude. Her sister too. She is married to Lord Jones and is known for treating others with contempt.”
“You do not know that yourself,” Iris tried to rationalise. “You have only heard that from others. You know as well as I do how quickly rumours spread around London.”
“Yes, well, I tried to think that. I wanted to believe that. I thought that maybe she was just shy, but it is all true. She is rude and not someone that I will ever marry.”
Iris nodded slowly, and her brain raced as she tried to work out what might have happened. “Did she do something in particular to make you feel like she was rude?”
“She rolled her eyes at me when I was talking about business.”
Iris found herself stifling a laugh. She did not want to be rude to her son, but she knew better than anyone how long-winded and dull his tales of work could be. He was very proud of his achievements, and rightfully so, but for someone who was not involved in the business world, it was very hard to listen to.
“What did her chaperone say?” she asked tactfully.
“He was very interested in what I had to say.” Edmund shook his head in dismay. He could not understand Mary’s reaction to him. Even now. “He was not rude to me at all.”
Iris took Edmund’s hand and stared deeply into his eyes. “Listen, Son, I know this might not be easy to accept, but for some Ladies, the idea of getting married is a hard one to digest, especially if it is to someone they have had chosen for them. Their father’s telling them that this is the right man for them is really hard to come to terms with. She is only just eighteen years old, is she not?”
“Yes.” Edmund shrugged. He did not understand where his mother was going with this. “So?”
“She is young. She does not even have her father around to argue with him about this. She is probably more distressed than you think. Maybe she is acting out, that is all. I am sure that it has nothing to do with you.”
Edmund pondered this for a moment. His mother certainly knew more about women than he did, but was she right with this one? Maybe Mary had been acting out as a form of rebellion, but that was not what he wanted either. He did not want a wife who was troublesome just for the sake of it. Especially if he did not feel any sort of love for her.
“Maybe that is the case, Mother, but I still do not wish to marry her.”
“Not even for your old mentor?”
Edmund shook his head. He did not like the idea of l
etting William Roberts down, but what else could he do? Maybe if he were around, he would be able to speak to him and find out the truth about his daughter, but that was not an option, unfortunately.
“I do not think so.”
“If that is the case, then you need to start getting yourself out there,” Iris pushed. “You are getting older now; it is time you find a wife and start having children. I know that you are holding out for the perfect woman, but you will not find her sitting around in the house like this.”
“What are you trying to say to me, Mother?”
“It is the season; there are many events happening. Men are out there at these events finding their wives, and you are doing nothing. I believe that it is time for you to start doing the same. If you do not find someone at these events, then maybe you should reconsider Mary.”
Edmund’s expression tightened. “I will not reconsider Mary. If I need to go to these events to get you off my back, then I shall.”
“It does not have to be like that,” Iris tried. “It might be something that you really enjoy.”
“Mother, you know I only attend the opera and other such events to keep my face known in society. That is all for business reasons. Going to something with the sole intent of meeting a woman will feel very uncomfortable to me. I do not wish things to be so forced.”
“I do not want to make you ...” Iris held back just a little bit. She did not want her son to feel pressured when all she really wanted was to help him.
“No, I shall. But only because my meeting with Mary was just that bad.”
As he spat those words out again, it was with much less conviction. Now that he had spoken about it to his mother a little, he felt less strongly about everything. Maybe she was right about the way that Mary had acted; perhaps he was making it a much bigger thing in his mind. Maybe he had not acted perfectly himself.
But he could not back down. He had said far too much about it.
“I will see what I can sort for you. I am sure it is supposed to be your father doing that but since he is not here ...” Iris stopped herself and smiled. “Anyway, it does not matter. I will ensure that you are invited to the best events. I will help you to find a wife.”
“Oh, yes, I look forward to it.” Edmund gave his own eye roll without really thinking about his actions. “Thank you very much, Mother.”
Iris stood up and walked towards the door with almost a skip in her step. Helping her son to find the perfect woman for him gave her a purpose that she had not felt in a very long time. Edmund might not see it now, but this was exactly what he needed. A good woman in his life would make him very happy.
“You do not need to be sarcastic, Edmund. You will soon see. Love does not always come as an initial moment of excitement anyway; sometimes, you need to be prepared for it to grow slowly. It might be a good idea for you to plan to see a woman more than once before you make up your mind about her ...”
“Yes, maybe if there is something that I might learn to like about her, not when it is instant dislike.”
“Oh, Edmund,” Iris shook her head at him. “Sometimes I think you can be so naïve.”
Edmund rolled his eyes and stormed out of the room, past his mother after that nasty comment towards his study. If anything, his mother’s words had made him even angrier than before. Why did she feel the need to interfere with everything? Why could she not just let him be? He was only four and twenty years old; he knew men that got married much older than him. It was very silly to think that there was any rush.
I will marry a woman that I love, and no one can tell me otherwise.
Determination flowed through him; he felt even stronger about his convictions now. He would find love somehow or another. And it certainly would not be with Mary Roberts. Even if his mother was right about him, he felt utterly certain that she was not the one for him.
***
As Iris handed Edmund a stack of invitations to events that had come through the mail for him, he had to admit that he was impressed. He had pushed the idea firmly to the back of his mind as he got on with his business and everyday life; he had not thought much about it, but it seemed that Iris had not done the same.
“Oh, I did not realise that this was something you were still doing,” he said as he took them from her. “Have we not moved past this?”
“I did not wish to speak of it considering it caused us to have such a fall out before, but yes, of course. I still wish for you to get married ... unless you are considering giving Mary Roberts another try? Have you reconsidered how you feel about her yet?”
Edmund did not want to admit it, but the more that time had passed, the more he could think only about her beauty rather than the things he did not like about her. He was not going to tell his mother this for fear of being accused of being shallow. He did not want Iris to think that after all of his convictions of only marrying the one that he loved, he was now thinking of a woman’s beauty over everything else.
“I do not think so,” he replied with an air of nonchalance. He jutted out his chin and kept his eyes away from his mother. He did not want her to see right through him. She knew him so well that she probably could anyway.
“Have you sent word to the man who is in control of her father’s estate, letting her know of your wishes?”
As Edmund shook his head, Iris knew with utter certainty that there was still a chance. Her son did everything by the book; he always made sure that his paperwork was filed on time. If he had not yet sent that letter out, there had to be a reason for it. Maybe he was thinking about Mary more than he let on.
After Edmund came home raging about his meeting with her, and he confessed to listening to all the rumours and gossip about her, Iris did some digging of her own. In all honesty, Iris had not managed to find out a lot about Mary or her sister. They seemed to be very quiet and mysterious. Two qualities that would probably lead to them being gossiped about negatively. Iris had lived long enough not to believe too much herself. She preferred to reserve judgement to discover her own opinions.
She would not tell Edmund, but secretly she was holding out hope she was the one that her son would end up with.
“Well, you must do it soon, especially if there is an inheritance hanging on it, and you do not wish to see her again. I presume she will need to make other arrangements. It is not fair to leave your decision unknown.”
For some reason, the idea of Mary making other arrangements caused a tight knot to form in Edmund’s chest.
What is wrong with me? he asked silently. Why do I care? If I do not wish to marry her, then I should let her be with someone else.
“I will send out a letter next week,” he said determinedly, more to himself than his mother. “Next week, after I have been to at least one of these events.” He held up the invitations although of course she already knew what he was talking about. “Then I can hopefully get back to doing what I do best without any interference.”
“Good, yes of course.” Iris held up her hands in a surrendering gesture. “You know that I only wish the best for you, that is all.”
Edmund did know that. He felt terrible for the way that he had been acting towards her when all she wanted to do was help. “You know I love you, Mother,” he said a little stiffly. “And I am grateful. You know what I am like. I am just set in my own ways. I want what I want.”
“I know, Edmund, and I respect that about you. I just want you to open yourself up a little more. You are a wonderful man. You will make someone a wonderful husband, and I am sure you will be a great father to any children you have. I just want you to have it all.”
Edmund thought about his own father at that moment in a way that he had not in a very long time. He wondered if he would be close to his father if he were still alive; he wondered if he would be there to give him some advice. Would his life be different if he had not lost his father? Would he be more open to letting love in without putting too much pressure on himself and the women that he met?
&nb
sp; It was then he realised that he was affected by the loss of his father just as Mary was. He had also been told during his search for information about the Roberts girls that their mother was no longer around either. That had to be very hard, no parents at all. He gave his mother a grateful look, glad that she was still around.
“I will go into it with open eyes; I promise you,” he told her in a moment with his guards down. “I know it is important to you that I am happy.”
“And fulfilled,” Iris jumped in. “I know that you are happy with your business. I know that overseas trade keeps you excited, but there is more to life. I just do not want you to forget that.”
As Edmund walked away, his mind was all over the place. Again, without even trying, his mother had made him think about things in an entirely different way. Or maybe she did know exactly what she was doing; perhaps she chose her words very carefully to ensure that he was sent into a tailspin. Either way, Edmund had the very strong feeling that everything was going to change. He did not know if this was a good or bad thing, but it seemed that he was about to find out...
