“Aimee, I’ll explain later.” Katie continued on in her upside-down position, hoping her friend would give her some time alone to get her thoughts straight—to figure out why the Lord had suddenly dropped Karl back into her life once again, after all these years.
“I just wanted to tell you that Mr. Borg is waiting up front for you.”
Katie groaned and stood aright. “Maybe he’ll go away if I stay in here long enough.” She began to work her hair into place with her fingers, but it didn’t want to cooperate.
“He’s not going anywhere,” Aimee explained, her brow still wrinkled in concern. “He said he would sit out there all day if he had to. And for some bizarre reason he asked if the bathroom had a window. Weird, right?”
Another groan escaped Katie’s lips. So, Karl hadn’t changed. In spite of his quip about the window, he’d always had the patience of a saint. Just one more area where they were polar opposites.
Her thoughts slipped back in time to another day when he had waited on her for hours. They were supposed to meet at the edge of the creek to go fishing at seven in the morning. Katie’s mother had given her more chores than usual that morning, and she didn’t make it until ten thirty. But there he sat, hat on his head, pole in his hand, legs slung over the edge of the creek, as if he had nothing better to do than spend three and a half hours waiting on her.
On the other hand, he’d managed to catch quite a few fish in her absence that day.
Still, with the sharp business suit he now wore, he likely had far more to do than sit in the front lobby of Bucks County Realty waiting on an old flame.
Hmm. Maybe flame wasn’t the right word. They’d never even kissed, after all.
She tried to avoid her friend’s expression, but Aimee made it difficult. Her penetrating gaze was tough to ignore.
“So, are you going to tell me what’s going on, or am I going to have to guess?”
“He. . .he’s just someone I used to know.” Katie took another glance in the mirror. “From my former life.”
“Ah. Well, he’s certainly got you all shook up. There’s got to be a reason why.”
“I’m just embarrassed, is all. It’s not every day I bathe in coffee.”
“I’ll admit the whole thing was plenty embarrassing.” Aimee folded her arms at her chest and shook her head. “But there’s more to it than that. Did you used to date this guy?”
“I can say in all honesty that I never dated Karl Borg.” No lying there. Teens in her conservative Amish community hadn’t dated, at least not in the traditional sense. Unless you called a buggy ride a date. Or a quiet walk after a barn raising.
“Hmm.” Aimee reached over and straightened the back of Katie’s collar, then stepped back to give her a once-over. “You never dated him, and yet your eyes lit up the moment you recognized him. Very suspicious.”
My eyes lit up? Katie pondered that for a second. There had been a moment of recognition but nothing more. Except, perhaps, fear. After drawing in a deep breath, she turned to face her friend, ready to deal with the obvious. “I’m going out there.”
“I wish I could come, too. I would pay money to hear this conversation.”
“I’ll fill you in later. I promise.” Katie reached to open the bathroom door then took a tentative step into the hall. Then another. And another. All the way to the lobby, she debated what she would say once she saw him.
Maybe it would be better not to plan anything out—just let nature take its course when the moment came.
On the other hand. . .as she rounded the corner into the lobby and took one look at Karl with that boyish face of his, only one thing came to mind. She wanted to give him her hand and let him guide her across the bridge at Pequea Creek one more time, for old time’s sake. Surely once would be enough to stop this crazy pounding in her heart.
THREE
Karl stood the moment Katie entered the room. He tried to squelch the anxiety that rushed over him as he stared into her beautiful face. She had changed in so many ways, and yet underneath that polished, coffee-coated exterior, the old Katie remained. Driven. Excited about life. Ready to take on the world.
As she drew near, Karl tried to figure out what to do. Should he embrace her? After all, they were old friends. Old friends met with a hug, didn’t they? At least among the Englishers. She reached out first, slipping an arm around his waist. He drew her close, and they remained, if only for a second.
Katie stepped back all too quickly, and he noticed the fear in her eyes. Would she find an excuse to shoot out of the front door or give him a few moments to ask the questions that had been nagging at him for years?
“I. . .um. . .was just about to leave for the day.” She glanced up at the clock on the wall, and he followed her gaze. 5:24.
“I can’t just leave without talking to you.” He gave her his best pleading look. “Couldn’t we please go out for—” He started to say “a cup of coffee” but stopped himself after thinking better of it. She’d already had enough coffee for one day. “Maybe a bite to eat?”
“I don’t know.” Katie paused and ran her fingers through her hair. “I look like a wreck.”
“You look wonderful,” he managed.
Her cheeks flushed pink, just as they had done a hundred times as a little girl when he’d teased her. Only now, she didn’t seem to mind his comments. In fact, she seemed to soften more as time went on.
“Just a few minutes to talk?” He tried again.
As she nodded, a wave of relief washed over him. Maybe he would get the answers he had been seeking, after all.
“Let me just run back to my office and grab my purse,” she said. “I’ll have to shut down my computer and turn out the lights, so it might take a couple of minutes.”
“I’ll wait.”
“Or you could come with.” She gestured toward the hall, and he followed along behind her like a puppy dog.
His eyes grew large as they entered her spacious office. “This is amazing, Katie.” He approached the mahogany bookshelf unit. “The craftsmanship on this piece is beautiful.”
She smiled and her cheeks turned pink. “I’ve always wondered what you might think of it. Your woodworking skills were the best in Lancaster County.”
“Hardly.” He laughed. “But I could definitely see myself working on something like this.” He drew in a deep breath and added, “In another life, I mean.”
“I hear ya.” She reached over to turn off her computer, and the room fell silent. Karl tried to cover up the awkwardness by looking at the pictures on the bookshelf. His heart nearly shifted to his toes as he came across a photo of three small children. Strange. He’d never thought to look at Katie’s left hand for a ring. If she had children, surely she had to be married.
Thankfully, she took note of his interest in the photograph and offered up a more palatable explanation. “What do you think of my cousin’s children? Aren’t they cute?”
Karl tried not to the let the relief show in his eyes as he turned back toward her. “They’re a nice-looking crew. The little girl reminds me of you at that age.” He looked again at the photograph, realizing the child wore modern English clothes and had a stylish haircut. “Except for a few obvious things.” He turned to give Katie a warm smile. “She does have the same batch of freckles on the end of her nose, just like you.”
Katie groaned as she reached for her purse. “I always hated those freckles.”
“I didn’t. I used to count them.”
Her gaze shifted down to some papers on the desk, which she rearranged. “The little girl’s name is Madison. She’s the spitting image of her mother.” Katie looked up, locking eyes with him. “You remember my cousin, Hannah, right? Aunt Emma’s daughter?”
“The one who ran away when she was eighteen and married the English boy?” he asked. Karl wished he could take the words back as quickly as they were spoken, but there was no swallowing them now that they were out.
“Yes. She met him during her rumspringa, while visiting friends
in Doylestown,” Katie explained. “And tried to fight her feelings for him. I think she must have convinced herself she could overcome her love for him, because she was baptized as soon as she returned home, made her commitment to the church.”
Karl knew what that meant of course. Once an Amish teen made the decision to be baptized, it was a public covenant to the Amish way of life. . .forever. To leave after making such a declaration would result in only one thing, at least in their Order.
“Less than a month after her joining the church, Matt showed up, completely brokenhearted. Told her that he couldn’t live without her.” Katie sighed. “I remember how torn she was over the decision. Despite her attempts to the contrary, her love for him proved to be very strong. And yet she knew if she left after joining the church, she would be—”
“Shunned.”
“Yes, and it’s so sad,” Katie explained, “because Matt’s a great guy, and he really loves the Lord. I think the decision to leave Paradise nearly killed Hannah, but she did it out of love for him.”
“I understand that kind of love.” His gaze shifted down- ward as soon as the words slipped out. Though he had not planned to convey such feelings, they obviously could not be held back. After a few seconds, he garnered the courage to look back up into Katie’s eyes.
“Love is a powerful thing,” she continued.
“And it often calls for sacrifice,” he added. At least from my experience.
“Yes, well. . .Hannah did sacrifice a lot. She had to give up one family to gain another.”
“Sad.”
“Most of the story is happy. She and Matt got married and settled in Doylestown, near his family. They’re both great people, very active in their local church. I’ve just always hated it that they can’t go back home to see her family. I know she’s thinking about it. From what I hear, many of the Amish are softening their stance on shunning. I’ve heard of a great many teens leaving after their baptism then being welcomed back at weddings and funerals and so forth.”
“I’ve heard the same.” He had always balked at the idea of shunning those who left the community but had kept his opinions to himself. Secretly, he had always been relieved that Katie had sneaked away before her baptism, realizing that left the door open for her return. She could go back if she wanted to.
Not that it looked like she wanted to.
He thought back to the events surrounding her leaving. Getting the news early in the morning. Hoping, praying, it was some sort of joke on her part. Waiting for days to hear something, anything. Finally getting the message about her trek to Doylestown to stay with extended family members.
Oh, how he had prayed during those days and weeks following her abrupt exit from Paradise. How he had fought the urge to run after her, to plead with her to come back—not just to him, but to the quiet, simple life they would live together.
As he gazed into her eyes now, Karl had to admit she seemed better suited to this fast-paced lifestyle. Perhaps she had found her niche, after all.
Maybe she’d found someone to love, as well.
He gave the bookshelf unit a quick glance, in search of another photo. Thankfully, he found nothing but real estate books and knickknacks. He looked at her left hand, praying he would not find a ring.
No ring.
Just then, Katie crossed the room in his direction to turn off the light. For a moment, she and Karl stood quite close in the semi-darkened room, almost close enough to reach out and touch one another. He struggled with the feelings that gripped him at her nearness.
With resolve building, he took a step backward, giving her the space she needed to close up the room. Maybe that was all she had ever needed. . .space.
❧
Katie pulled off her jacket before entering the restaurant. The white blouse underneath was free of coffee stains. Besides, she felt constricted in the jacket, especially on a warm June evening like this.
Karl met her at the door of her car, a smile lighting his face. “Are you hungry?”
“Always.”
“That’s the girl I remember.”
Katie couldn’t help but laugh as their eyes met. Just as quickly, she stopped. No matter how comfortable she felt around Karl, she did not want to give him the wrong impression. She didn’t want to give any man the wrong impression, for that matter.
They walked together toward the restaurant with Karl making stilted conversation about the weather. She played along, not sure what else to do. Surely once they got inside, the tough conversation would begin—the one she’d avoided for twelve years.
The hostess took their names and within minutes led the way to a table near the back of the room. Karl put his hand on the small of Katie’s back and guided her through the crowd. His touch offered a sense of security. She’d almost forgotten how safe she felt around him. How protected.
After they had ordered their food, she could put off the inevitable no longer. “I have to get this out,” she said, looking him in the eye. “I need to tell you how sorry I am that I left like I did.” Katie noticed his eyes glistened with moisture as she continued. “I know you probably think it was because of you. Because I didn’t want to—”
“To marry me.”
She drew in a deep breath and gazed at the table. “I’ll admit I wasn’t ready to get married. I had so many things I wanted to do, so many places I wanted to go. I knew if I got married, those things would never happen.”
“Not necessarily.”
“Still, the chances were slim.” She gazed into his eyes, hoping to make him understand. “The more time I’ve spent away from Paradise, the more I’ve come to realize—it wasn’t you I ran away from. It was the lifestyle. The constraints. I’m convinced I was born for. . .”
“Bigger things?”
She sighed—partly out of relief at the fact that he understood and partly because she realized how pompous that sounded. “It seems so ugly when you say it like that,” she said. “And so. . .worldly. I’m not a worldly girl, Karl. Not really. I still have a very strong faith, probably stronger than it was back then. I just wanted to think in broader terms, travel in wider circles.”
“I understand.”
“And I certainly wasn’t hoping for bigger things in a husband. In fact”—she gave him a shrug—“I wasn’t hoping for a husband at all. That was the problem. I wanted to get out and see things for myself. I wanted an opportunity to spread my wings and fly a little, to see what I could become on my own. Without—”
“A man holding you back.”
Another sigh slipped out, but she didn’t answer right away because the waitress appeared at their table with water glasses in hand.
“Not everyone is meant to marry,” Kate offered, after the waitress left. “There were plenty of spinsters in our community, remember? They cared for other people’s children and took in laundry to earn a living. That would never have suited me.”
“You were never meant to be a spinster.” He reached across the table to take her hand. “But I do get your point. I know what it feels like to be trapped, to think there’s no way out.”
“You do?”
“Yes.” He paused and withdrew his hand, looking a bit uncomfortable all of a sudden. “It’s possible you’ve already heard this, but about two years after you left, my parents were both killed in a fire.”
Katie’s eyes filled with tears right away. “I did hear, though it was some time after, and I’m so sorry.” She didn’t add that she’d tried to track him down after getting the news. Tried to send a card. But by then, he’d already moved away from Paradise.
Now his eyes filled with tears. “The house burned to the ground after being struck by lightning. I lost more than my parents that day. I lost. . .my whole life. My existence. My place in the community.”
“What do you mean?”
He shrugged. “I’m an only child, as you know, and not a child, at that. But to rebuild after such a tragedy just felt. . . overwhelming. I can honestly say I’ve neve
r felt more alone in my life.” He paused for a moment then added, “Don’t misunderstand me. I knew the Lord was with me. I felt His presence daily. But I guess I needed the reassurance of someone who could help guide me. Advise me.”
A thousand things went through Katie’s mind at once as she took note of the woeful look on his face. If she had stayed in Paradise and married Karl, they would have rebuilt the farm. . .together. He never would have faced those things alone.
“I heard you sold the farm to Ike Biden,” she said.
“Yes.” Karl’s face lit in a smile. “Ike was always such a good friend. He built a fine home on it, one now filled with half a dozen children and a wonderful wife. And I moved on to Harrisburg.”
“Harrisburg?” She took a sip of water and then leaned back in her chair.
Karl nodded. “I had an uncle there. My father’s brother. He convinced me I had what it took to become an attorney.”
Katie’s eyes widened. “An attorney? But the Amish are opposed to that occupation, aren’t they?”
“My uncle was an Englisher. And it didn’t take him long to convince me that I could actually do some good if I got the proper training. So, he pointed me in the right direction. I got my GED. My test scores were really high.”
“Same here.” She couldn’t help but smile. “Guess that small classroom environment really paid off.”
“Yeah.” He smiled. “After that, I went to college then on to law school.”
“Turning you into a lawyer makes perfect sense to me.” Katie chuckled. “You were always great at debating me on every little thing.”
Karl laughed. “I can debate with the best of them, I guess. Least, that’s what my uncle said. So off to law school I went. After I passed the bar, I worked at his firm in Harrisburg. Then, about a year ago, I was offered an opportunity to practice real estate law in Doylestown. I couldn’t turn it down.”
“I see.” She paused and gave him an admiring look. “You’ve really made something of yourself, Karl. I’m so proud of you.” He shook his head. “There’s a part of me that wishes I could go back. This new life is so. . .crazy. Hectic. Sometimes I miss the old days, working with my hands, sitting out by the creek with a fishing pole in my hands. It’s different now.”
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