by Diana Palmer
He felt the smile against his cheek and lifted his head. His eyes, like hers, were soft in the aftermath of fulfillment. He lifted himself enough to see her face and smiled back.
Her body began to throb all over again. He hadn’t moved away and when she shifted one leg, she felt him intimately. His eyes grew misty with the return of desire, like her own.
He moved, too, and watched her lips part.
She reached up, arching her hips so that she caressed him in the most exciting way, and he reacted with incredible ease. His breath caught at the quickening.
“That’s impossible,” she assured him. “I read it in a book….”
“Written by a virgin, no doubt,” he breathed into her open mouth, and began to move again.
“Lang…isn’t it risky…?”
He stilled. “Yes.” He bit off the word. “My God, yes!” With anguish in his face, he lifted away from her, and fell onto his back. He lay there, his fists clenched, totally vulnerable while he fought to still the demons.
She leaned over him, boldly watching his face while he struggled with the desire he didn’t dare satisfy. His eyes held hers while he forced himself to breathe normally until the pain subsided. His gaze slid down to her soft breasts and lingered there. He pulled her closer and kissed them hungrily.
“I want to do it again and again and again,” she whispered softly, savoring his mouth on her body.
“So do I. But I don’t want to make a baby in the fever of it,” he whispered back. He held her close then, while they slowly came down from the heights.
She closed her eyes and went heavy against him, gloriously contented. “Do you really want to marry me?” she asked daringly.
“Yes,” he said.
She drew her cheek against his chest, and the clean scent of him came up into her nostrils. “When?”
“We can talk about dates later,” he murmured, oddly reluctant to pin it down to a certainty. He smoothed her hair. “We have to get to work.”
She lifted herself to look at the clock and groaned. “Oh, my goodness, I’m an hour late!”
“The world won’t end,” he murmured dryly.
“That’s what you think! I have a business meeting in a half hour!”
“Look at me.”
She did, and his smile was her undoing. “Don’t panic,” he said. “I’ll get you there in time.”
He kissed her gently and put her out of the bed, stretching lazily as he got to his feet. “Come on. We’ll have time for a quick shower.”
He led her into the bathroom and put her into the shower with him. It took longer than it normally would, because he made her bathe him and that led to exploration and soft kisses that made him grit his teeth.
“I’m not prepared.” He chuckled, lifting her out of the spray. He turned the shower off and dried her. “No accidents.”
His concern seemed rather beyond what she might have expected. She felt insecure. “I’ll see the doctor,” she promised, “so that we can make sure nothing happens until we want it to.”
He studied her rapt face quietly. “Your career means a lot to you, doesn’t it?” he asked solemnly. “For now, at least?”
She read the thoughts in his face. “Yes,” she said slowly. She frowned. “You…do eventually want a child?”
He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Of course I do. Now, let’s get to work. Tonight, we’ll drive down to Floresville and tell Bob and Connie our good news.”
She wanted to pin him down on the subject of a family. Perhaps he was just thinking of her. But there had been something in his eyes when she mentioned children….
He smoothed down the frown. “Stop borrowing trouble and get dressed. Just look what you’ve made me do,” he said, glowering. “I’ve been seduced, for God’s sake!”
Her eyes twinkled. “Why, so you have. Would you like to press charges?”
“I’d like to press something,” he murmured, chuckling.
“I did offer,” she reminded him.
He bent and kissed her carelessly. “I’ll be prepared next time.”
“Or I will,” she added.
While Lang gathered his own clothes and began to dress, she moved to her dresser and pulled out a bra and slip and quickly put them on with her back to Lang. Feeling a little shy now, she walked to the closet and took out a green, patterned shirtwaist dress and put it on.
“You look nice in green,” he said.
“Thanks.” She hesitated, suddenly remembering his abrupt arrival. “Why did you come by this morning?” she asked.
“I’m giving you a ride into work. And I wanted to know if you got any calls last night,” he said with a lazy smile.
She smiled back and shook her head. “There was nothing on the answering machine. Nobody bothered me at all. Is this some new tactic he’s using?” she asked then. “Is he trying to drive me crazy by waiting several days between incidents?”
“It’s a good psychological trick,” he agreed. “I wouldn’t put it past him. But that gas grenade was dangerous. Sometimes they start fires. If it had been beneath the seat, and it had exploded under you…”
“I get the message,” she said uneasily. Her eyes met his in the mirror while she put on makeup and ran a comb through her short hair. “In other words, we’re not out of the woods yet.”
He nodded.
She put down the brush and searched in another drawer for her panty hose. She put them on while Lang watched with appreciative eyes, then she slipped on her high heels and picked up her purse.
“What about my car?” she asked. “You didn’t get it picked up, did you?”
He shook his head. “Sorry. I’ll see to it this morning.”
She turned and looked at him blatantly. “Did you see Lorna last night?” she asked slowly.
He lifted an amused eyebrow. “If I had, do you think I’d have been so hungry for you?”
She flushed. “Well…”
He drew her against him. “You still don’t know much. Some men can go all night. I can’t. If I’d been with another woman all night, I wouldn’t have been capable this morning. Does that answer the question you can’t quite ask me?”
“Yes,” she said ruefully. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have pried.”
He frowned. “Kirry, you trusted me enough to let me make love to you,” he reminded her softly. “That gives you every right in the world to know about me. I haven’t slept with Lorna, and I won’t. I want to marry you.”
He said he did. But he wouldn’t talk about a date and he didn’t want to risk making her pregnant. She almost mentioned that, but what they’d shared was too new and exciting to spoil. She decided to live one day at a time. At least he did want her for keeps this time. She could settle for that. For now.
She reached up and kissed him very softly. Her eyes adored him. She tried not to notice the indecision in his. “Let’s go see if we’re fired,” she teased, and stepped away from him.
“Right.”
He drove her to the office in a faintly strained silence. He’d burned his bridges this time. There would be no going back. He’d compromised her, and as old-fashioned as it might seem to another modern man, he felt obliged to do the right thing and marry her. He did care about her, very much. It was just that he was trapped now. It didn’t feel as comfortable as he’d thought it would, to be totally committed. And she wanted children.
He loved Mikey, of course, but it would be different when the child was his own, and he became responsible for it and Kirry. She was a working woman. She wanted a career. But she’d slept with him, and now his old footloose days were gone forever, because he hadn’t been able to hold back. He’d wanted Kirry to the point of madness. He glanced at her, remembering how it had been, and he couldn’t manage to regret that heated loving in her bed. No matter what the cost, it was worth it! He only had to get used to the idea of being committed. That shouldn’t be so hard, he told himself firmly. He’d gotten used to being on the road all the time when
he joined the Company, he’d gotten used to wearing a gun. He’d even managed to live with worse things. It would grow on him. And as for children, he’d find some way to put her off. With that certainty in mind, he smiled at Kirry and broke into casual conversation.
But she wasn’t fooled. She saw the worry on his face, the indecision he couldn’t hide. He’d gone over the edge with her and now he was sorry about it, she could tell. He was going to make the best of it, but how was she going to be able to live with a man who was forcing himself to act contented? It was a glimpse of a nightmare.
The one nice thing about the morning was that Erickson was nowhere in sight, in either of his cars. But she’d been overly relieved one time too many, so she wasn’t taking anything for granted. He might be hiding nearby, waiting for her to relax.
Lang stopped the car at her office door and turned to her. “Don’t let your guard down,” he said gently. “Just because we don’t see him doesn’t mean that he isn’t around.”
“I was just thinking the same thing,” she replied. Her eyes searched his. “I’m sorry,” she said gently.
He frowned. “About what?”
She shrugged a thin shoulder and forced a smile. “You aren’t ready,” she said. “You thought you were, but you aren’t. I was as much to blame as you were for what happened, so you don’t need to feel guilty. You don’t need to feel obligated to marry me, either. We were careful. There won’t be any…consequences.”
He stared at her with conflicting emotions. “Are you sure you don’t want to marry me, Kirry?” he asked slowly.
The way he phrased it said everything. She didn’t dare cry or look regretful. “I enjoyed what we did,” she said. “But when the newness wore off, we’d still be stuck with each other. You have your job and I have mine, and marriage isn’t the end of the rainbow anymore. Maybe we ‘d better think about this before we jump into it.”
“That’s exactly how I feel,” he said, and looked relieved. “But we can still be engaged, while we’re thinking about it. Okay?”
Wimp, she told herself. “Okay,” she agreed too readily, and then grimaced at her own scramble for crumbs.
“We can drive down and have supper with Connie and Bob. I’ll call them.”
“I’d enjoy seeing them again.”
“I’ll pick you up here after work. Be careful.”
She nodded, hesitating weakly.
His eyes began to glitter. “Want me to kiss you?” he murmured, teasing.
She started to deny it, but the irony of the situation made her smile. “Yes,” she said.
He smiled. “I like that honesty,” he said, his voice husky and deep. “I want to kiss you, too.”
She moved closer and tilted her face up for him. He framed it in his big hands and bent, drawing his lips softly over her own. But the passion between them was too raw and new to allow for tenderness just yet, and very quickly, he had her close in his arms and was kissing the breath out of her. She moaned, and he came to his senses.
“I can’t take much of that,” he said with graveyard humor. He took out his handkerchief and removed the smeared lipstick from around her mouth and then his own. “I’ll come by and take you out to lunch, if you’re free.”
“I’m not,” she said miserably. “I have to meet some of Lorna’s group for a business lunch.”
He sighed. “Okay. Another time.”
She nodded, reaching for the door.
He stayed her hand. “I haven’t given Lorna any messages for you,” he said quietly. “If she starts handing out tidbits about me, take them with a grain of salt, will you?”
She smiled over her shoulder. “Okay.”
“I’ll see you later.”
“Sure.” She got out and walked into the building, and had to force herself not to look back. She’d made her bed. Now she was going to have to lie in it.
“You’re late,” Mack grumbled the minute she walked in the door. “Lorna McLane has been on the phone ten times asking where you were. She couldn’t seem to locate our security chief, either.” He looked at Kirry suspiciously. “Do you know where he is?”
“He was with me,” she said, fighting a blush.
Mack hesitated. “Oh.”
“You needn’t look so shocked. Lang and I are engaged,” she added.
His face relaxed into a beaming smile. “Congratulations.”
“Those might be a little premature. We’re not planning an elopement.”
“You never know,” he replied. “Lang strikes me as an impulsive man.”
“He strikes most people that way. But he’s actually very cautious,” she said, remembering him with the familiarity of years. “He’s very methodical. He always thinks first.”
She remembered that when she was alone in her office. Lang was extremely cautious, in fact. He never leaped before he looked, or let his emotions lead him around. So why had he let himself go with her this morning? Despite the fact that he took precautions, it was totally unlike him to leap in without considering the consequences. At the very least, Kirry’s feelings for him would lead her to expect commitment from a man who seduced her. He knew that. Had he really lost his head? Or had he changed enough that he might actually want to marry her?
She didn’t have time to ponder the question for very long. Lorna McLane called again, and she was fuming.
“Where have you been, Miss Campbell?” she asked in a scathing tone. “I really don’t have all day to chase you down. Do you want this account or not?”
Kirry bit her tongue to keep from telling the truth. “Certainly we want it, Miss McLane,” she said in a pacifying tone. “I’m sorry, I was unavoidably detained getting to work this morning.”
“By Lang?” came the poisonous reply.
Kirry’s hand tightened on the receiver. “If you must know, yes,” she replied curtly.
“You little tramp,” Lorna said huskily.
“Lang and I are engaged to be married, Miss McLane,” Kirry informed her. “What we do in our private lives is hardly any of your business!”
There was an indrawn breath and a long pause, with audible breathing. “He wouldn’t…he isn’t the marrying kind! You’re lying!”
“If you think so, you’re at liberty to ask him.”
“I’ve called him a number of times, but he’s never around. I guess he’s been with you.”
“I’ve had some problems here. Lang has been teaching me self-defense,” she returned.
“And a few other tricks, I’ll bet. He’s a wonderful lover, isn’t he?” she drawled. “But wait until you get him to the altar before you start looking for congratulations. He was engaged to me, once, too. He doesn’t want children, did you know?” she added with a poisonous note in her voice. “He has to be free to walk out if he wants to, so kids are out of the question.”
“He wants children. We both do,” she said hesitantly.
“Really? Pin him down, dear. I dare you.”
“Miss McLane, this is really…”
“I’ll expect to see you at lunch,” Lorna continued unabashed. “I’ve asked the Lancasters to join us while we discuss the details of this promotion. I would really prefer to have your colleague, Mack, work on it. I find that women aren’t quite as cooperative as men when I make suggestions.”
I’m not surprised, Kirry thought, but she didn’t dare say it. She was trying to picture Miss McLane wrapped from toes to eyes in green satin and pinned with safety pins. It kept her sane.
“I’m sure I’d have no objections to Mack replacing me,” Kirry volunteered, thinking that Mack would kill her for stepping down. He had no affection for Lorna.
“Then, we’ll be able to settle this amicably. I’m so glad.”
“I’ll see you at lunch, then.”
“Indeed you will,” Lorna purred, and made it sound like a threat.
8
Lorna had a surprise for Kirry at lunch. Not only had she insisted that the Lancasters be in attendance, but Lang was there, to
o, looking irritable and reluctant.
“I’m sure you won’t mind if Lang joins us,” Lorna told Kirry privately. “I thought you might like the Lancasters to share in the news of your engagement.”
She moved away in a cloud of expensive perfume to greet the dark, elegantly dressed Lancasters before Kirry could reply. “I know that I won’t be giving away any terrible secrets if I tell you that Lang and Miss Campbell are to be married,” Lorna told the Lancasters, smiling.
Kirry wanted to tell her that feathers were sticking out of her mouth, but she didn’t dare. She smiled instead, although she couldn’t keep it from looking strained.
“Is this true?” Mrs. Lancaster asked, delighted.
Lang straightened. He glared at Lorna and moved closer to Kirry, taking her hand in his. “Yes, it is,” he said, but he didn’t sound like a happy bridegroom.
“Well, we must help with the arrangements for the wedding,” Mrs. Lancaster continued, and her husband smiled his agreement. “When is it to be?”
“We haven’t set a date,” Lang said stiffly.
“Surely you plan to make it soon, Lang, dear?” Lorna mused, leaning back to smile at him with hatred in her eyes.
“There’s no rush,” he said firmly. “Kirry and I have plenty of time.”
Kirry knew that he didn’t like to be pushed, but there was more to it than that. He was so obviously reluctant to be pinned down on a date that it was embarrassing.
“That’s right,” Kirry said quickly, backing him up only because she didn’t like Lorna. “We plan on a long engagement.”
“I see,” Mr. Lancaster replied with narrowed eyes.
“Well, if you’re not planning to start a family right away, I suppose there’s no hurry about it,” Lorna purred. “How many children are you going to have, Lang?” she asked. “Two or three?”
Lang’s face went rigid. “We haven’t discussed that.”
“Surely you want a son?” Lorna persisted.
He glared at her and then deliberately glanced at his watch.
“We’d better get started,” Mr. Lancaster said, taking the hint. “We all have duties to perform. Now what is this about switching the service on your account, Miss McLane?” he asked politely.
