He ran a hand through his hair. “Yes, my brother left the estate in deep debt. I’m handling it now, but I’ve got my brother’s death occupying my mind. And the case I left behind in London.”
“Why don’t you drop the case?” Patience asked.
“Because it will define my career. I will be sought after and be highly compensated. After finding the financial strain of my family’s estate, I need that case more than ever.”
Patience bit at her bottom lip. “You must take me with you when you go.”
Walter leveled her with a stern stare. “Patience, we’ve talked about this.”
“I’m old enough to make my own decisions. I don’t need my parents’ blessing.”
Walter shut his mouth. His face became dark, and he began to walk again, leading her out of town. “I would be honored to walk you home, Miss Hawthorne,” he said stiffly.
Patience’s spirits dropped as her stomach churned. He would not let her help. She followed him, trying to keep his pace. “You do not love me.” She stopped as realization fell upon her. It was the only explanation of his change in behavior to her.
He stopped, searching her eyes. “I do.” The longing in his voice confirmed his statement.
“Then why refuse me?”
“I believe it was you who refused me.”
Patience’s mouth dropped. “My parents refused you. I’ve been trying to get you back ever since.”
Walter sighed, continuing his pace. “You don’t understand. Your parents are right. Socially and financially, we are not a good match. My family needs money. You won’t have a dowry without your parents’ blessing.” He looked darkly at the ground, kicking aside a stone. “I would not be able to adequately provide for you... or my mother and sister. I must find a bride whose parents will accept me.”
Patience’s walk slowed to a stop, and Walter turned to face her again.
For an endless moment, they stared at each other, Patience fighting back the urge to scream at his pigheadedness. She hated the stern way he looked at her—not at all like the smiles he had frequently given her. It was all wrong. Walter could not mean to give up on them so easily. There had to be a way.
He must have seen the hurt in her eyes, because he took a step toward her, then hesitated, clasping his hands behind his back. “Patience...”
She didn’t respond. She didn’t know how. It was his decision, no matter how much she told him of her love, she really had no choice in the matter. For a brief moment she wondered if she should let him go. Her throat tightened at the thought, and tears stung her eyes.
She saw the instant he broke. He rushed toward her and caught her elbows. She felt a rush of adrenaline at his sudden proximity. His urgent touch.
“If you help me, you must promise to keep anything you learn hushed up. There are things I know about my brother’s death that may shock you. I want you to understand that.”
She nodded, breathless at his sudden turnaround. “I understand.”
He leaned closer. “Meet me outside my home tomorrow morning. I will tell you everything I know. And, with your help, hopefully we can get to the bottom of this mystery.”
Patience nodded again, her head spinning. What could be so troubling about his brother’s death? Why was he so secretive?
“I’ll be there,” she promised.
Walter released her. Then, as a second thought, he took her hand, bowed, and kissed the back of it lightly, making her insides flutter. “Until tomorrow,” he said.
Dropping her hand, he walked past her in the direction of town. She stood for a moment, alone in her thoughts. Was this really happening? She had dreamed of this for so long. She could hardly believe Walter had let her back into his confidence. She would not let this opportunity pass. Before the sun set on the day tomorrow, Walter would see reason again and agree to let her into his life for good. The thought made her ecstatically happy, and she wondered if sleep would come tonight.
Chapter Nine
WALTER WANDERED AROUND the front of the house, unable to keep still. His sister had given up playing the pianoforte for now, for which he was grateful. But his mother still stayed locked in her rooms. He hated how much Daniel’s death had affected her health. He had to care and protect her and Henrietta, no matter the cost.
Walter hadn’t been able to sleep much last night. He couldn’t believe he had agreed to let Patience in on his investigation.
But she had mentioned how he didn’t have to do this alone, and that struck him. He realized it would help to have a confidante, to have another mind working with his. And Patience had always been one of his best and most loyal friends. She would always be his first choice in sharing secrets.
She arrived just as the sun was warming the earth in a crème colored dress that enhanced the red in her auburn hair. Walter felt his chest constrict at the sight of her. He wanted her by his side for the rest of his life, but the impediments that stood between them were still too great.
It was only a fantasy. After her parent’s initial refusal, and now his family’s debts, he couldn’t rationalize offering for her again. His heart twisted in pain at the thought of giving her up, but inside he knew it was the responsible thing to do.
As she approached him, he clenched his jaw. She would be the first person he told about his discovery at the blacksmith’s. It was fitting given the place she held in his heart, but revealing it to another person would make it all the more real.
Patience smiled as she reached his side. “Are you ready to investigate?” she asked, optimistic as a sunflower shining in the morning’s light.
He wanted to partake in her optimism, and he tried to return the smile, but he feared it came across as more of a grimace.
“Come. I don’t want my family knowing you’re here, so you’ll need to remain silent.” He pulled her hand into his, ignoring how it caused heat to shoot through his entire body at the mere touch. He pulled her through the front door, leading her through the entryway and up the stairs to the study. All the while Patience moved silently on her tiptoes. Memories came flooding back. They’d done this too often to count, but this time the stakes were much higher.
As they found safety inside the study, Walter closed the door and locked it. The unconventional situation struck him suddenly, and he had to work hard at ignoring their new situation. He’d longed to be like this again with Patience, but now, no one could find them here.
Alone. He turned his eyes to hers. She was watching him, silently asking him to come to her. He balled his hands into fists to keep himself in check. His jaw tightened when she drew her brows together in frustration. Did she not know how hard it was to control himself when she was around? Tempting him like this was only making it harder for the both of them. Every instinct in him told him to go to her and give her what they both wanted. But he knew if he tasted her sweet kisses, he would never be able to go back. He’d done it once before and it nearly broke him.
And then she walked slowly toward him, and those perfect brows lifted in challenge. He squeezed his fists tighter as pain shot through his palms. He wouldn’t be surprised if he’d drawn blood. Pain was good. It would keep him grounded. He should back away, but he felt rooted to the spot as if he were a planet stuck in her gravity, unable to break free. She took her final steps, stopping mere inches from him. Her eyes took in each feature of his face, flitting from jawbone, to lips, to nose, to eyes—she stopped there. Her challenge vanished, turning to longing. He held his breath, waiting for her to back down, and then he saw something change in her eyes. Determination? She brought her hands to his face and cupped it lightly. Her touch felt wonderful on the stubble of his cheeks. Though he still stiffened at the small movements while wishing her closer, wishing for more. She slowly pulled his face to hers, and the action caused him to instantly relax. To melt.
A new scent of rose water and mint lingered. When had she changed her perfume? Her lips were nearly upon his, bringing his focus painfully on what he must do. As he cr
adled her face, she let go of his, moving her arms around his waist. The trust she placed in him nearly undid him, but he moved his lips to her ear, grasping at the last vestige of control he had in him to ward her off.
“Please. If I kiss you, I fear I will never be able to stop.” His pleading was but a whisper.
She let out a measured breath but nodded her acquiescence into his chest. He quickly moved one arm around her waist while twisting his other hand through her hair. He squeezed one last time before breaking contact. She did not fight him in this.
He banished her touch from his mind. They had work to do.
Patience did not look at him as she took a seat behind the desk. He sat beside her, probably too close as he scooted a wicker chair next to her. He mulled over his next words. Patience waited, still not casting even a glance in his direction.
Finally, he straightened and started with a breath.
“The blacksmith and I discovered the other day that Daniel’s death was no mere accident. Someone sawed through the axle, causing it to snap during his journey.” Walter did not so much as pause to take in air at his explanation. “Our leading suspicion is that someone wished harm on Daniel—” He paused, afraid to say the next words. “We fear he was intentionally killed. Murdered.”
Her eyes flew to his as she stifled a gasp, covering her mouth with both her hands, her eyes widening larger than he’d ever seen them.
“Walter,” she whispered, her eyes softening as she took in the information. “I’m so sorry.” Her hand flew to his, and she squeezed tightly. He grasped her hand, bending to place a kiss on the only place that was acceptable before straightening and clearing his throat.
“The next thing we need to consider is the motive.”
“Do you have any ideas?” Patience asked quietly, her eyes softening.
Walter turned his eyes to the financial records he had left sprawled on the desk, trying not to scowl. “I would suspect that his debts have something to do with it, but I can’t be sure.”
Patience followed his gaze and lightly touched a page of the records, her brows coming together in a frown. “Have you found anything to imply he owed a fortune to someone dangerous?”
Walter shook his head. “There are so many debts. But I haven’t seen a large enough sum drawn out anywhere.”
Patience bit at her bottom lip, and Walter’s thoughts once again wandered to tasting them for himself.
“Either he didn’t borrow money from someone dangerous, and the recorded debts are correct,” she said slowly, “or he did, and didn’t record it. In which case—you’re in deeper debt than you realized.”
Walter waved it off. “If there’s no record, I shouldn’t have to worry about it. Unless someone approaches me about it, I’ll assume everything is here. They wouldn’t have killed him if they still wanted the money.”
Patience nodded then opened a drawer, looking up at him under her long lashes. “May I?”
He blew a breath out, not ready to find out all the details. “By all means.” He let her do her detective work. She always had been quite good at it.
She rifled through the drawer, looking through letters and other documents.
“There must be some sort of clue in here somewhere.”
Walter sidled close beside her and joined in sifting through the drawers, pulling out anything that seemed interesting or pertinent. A handful of letters stood out to him, but most of the documents were bills and invoices. He didn’t even know which ones had been paid or not.
Patience picked up a letter and scanned it, her forehead creasing.
“Walter.” She leaned into him, showing him the contents of the letter.
He caught a whiff of her rose water and mint perfume again and forced his concentration on the words in the letter where he saw glimpses of conversation.
“Haymarket Theater? In London? Why is he corresponding with them?” His eyes dropped to the signature.
Gabriella Fox.
His eyebrows shot up. His brother was corresponding with a Theater woman. The atmosphere in the room suddenly changed as the realization of what this might mean, hit him.
He took the letter from Patience and scanned it, his eyes widening by the second. He turned to Patience and noticed her reddened cheeks. She’d read the letter too. He cleared his throat, feeling he’d stumbled upon his brother’s deepest, darkest secret yet. It was littered with seductive innuendos and hopes of their future together as husband and wife. Miss Fox went on to insist he visit her soon and not to worry about his financial situation. She would keep his mind—among other things—occupied.
“I think it is time we end our time alone. I’m sorry you had to see this.” He folded up the letter and stuffed it in his waistcoat pocket. “I should have protected you from this darkness. Please, let me figure this out alone.” He stood, backing away from her.
If someone caught them in here alone, they’d be forced to marry.
Patience stood and moved to his side once more. She looked him square in the eyes.
“I am not the innocent you left me.”
His heart constricted. What could she mean? She must have seen the uncertainty in his eyes, for she stepped closer and placed a hand on his elbow. A hard lump lodged in his throat. Was the reason she was brought so hastily back to the country because she had been sullied, touched? He’d kill Lord Seton for it. His eyes turned hard as he looked away.
“Walter, look at me.” Her quiet pleading forced his eyes to return to hers. She gulped. “When I went to the east end of London, I saw things I wish I could banish from my mind. The filth, the desperation, the lowest of humanity, scratching and clawing to make an existence.” She stopped as if trying to banish images from her mind. “I almost did not make it out of there with my virtue intact. One could argue that I didn’t.”
That last sentence broke him. He pulled her into his arms, kissing the hot tears that fell from her eyes. He trailed his kisses down her cheek in quick succession until his lips met hers. He never imagined how both wonderful and desperate her kiss could be. If he could take every pain they’d suffered in each other’s absence, he would. He should have ignored her parents and taken her off to become his wife without her parents’ blessing. It would have been hard, but nothing could be as hard as the separation they’d endured.
As the intensity of his emotion cooled, so did his kisses. He slowed, kissing her with more purpose, remembering the closeness they’d once shared. And then he pulled away, taking in her rumpled state.
“I’m sorry.” He shook his head, clearing the fog, forcing their reality back into place. Her look still held sorrow as she stepped back into his arms.
He pulled her close, breathing her in once more. “You are not sullied. Even if—” His voice broke, and he cleared his throat. “Even if—you had been compromised, well and truly I mean, you would still be whole in my eyes.” He paused, letting his words sink into her heart. “Know this. I would have never sent you to the east end.” He squeezed tighter as a yelp escaped her lips.
He stood perfectly still, just holding her as her cries slowly calmed. She backed away, looking resolved.
“I’m sorry. We should be figuring out your brother’s murder.”
He shook his head. “We needed to resolve that issue first.”
She nodded, and he pulled them back to the desk. “I will look at the rest of the letters later. Daniel was in charge of the estate. He was expected to marry a wealthy woman to keep the family afloat. With his frivolous spending, he’d especially needed a rich wife. I don’t understand his actions.” It infuriated Walter that Daniel would throw away his responsibilities for a Theater girl who seemed to have little to no standards and certainly no money.
He felt Patience’s breath on his neck, light and steady. “Do you think there could be a link? Perhaps Daniel had been involved with the wrong woman and someone came after your brother for it?”
Walter frowned. “I highly doubt a man would kill for a Theater we
nch,” he said bitterly, thinking of the mess his brother had left behind.
His mind spun at the implications. From the sound of it, Daniel had been invested in Miss Fox. He had visited her several times. Perhaps she knew something the rest of them didn’t. He turned to Patience. She still stared at him, but this time, he saw joy in her eyes. He held back his smile. “I must go straightaway to London.”
Patience stood again, and Walter moved to the door. “Perhaps we should look for more clues first.”
He turned back to her. “No. If anyone knows about who might want to harm Daniel, it’s this woman.” He pointed to his breast pocket where he had stashed the letters. “I must speak to her at once.”
“Let me come with you,” Patience said.
Walter gave her a stern glare. “No—” He enunciated the words clearly. “I won’t be gone long, just a day or two. I need to speak with my mentor about the case I’m working on anyway.”
“What would you like me to do while you’re away then? I can’t just sit idly by and do nothing.”
Walter shook his head at her. “Stay out of trouble. I don’t want you to get hurt again.”
“I can take care of myself.” She hesitated, her eyes sweeping over his face. “Is there anyone at all you are suspicious of? I can investigate.”
He took quick strides to stand by her side again. “Patience, please. Let me take care of this alone. I can’t be worrying over your safety while I’m away.” He looked into her eyes, willing her look of resolve away. She was a stubborn woman when she wanted to be.
She sighed, and he saw defeat in her eyes. His smile stretched, and he couldn’t help pulling her to him one last time. He kissed her softly, never wanting to stop. But he did.
“I suppose I can also take this time to discover why Mama is so against your family,” she said as her eyes cleared, her lips pulling upward.
Walter clenched his jaw. “Yes,” he said dully. “Do that.”
But a cold, hard truth entered his mind. Daniel had nearly thrown away the security of his family for love. Walter knew now that no matter if Patience learned the reason to her mother’s aversion to him, that he could not marry her still, not without the blessing of her parents. The cost to keeping his family financially and socially secure meant he had to sacrifice love for duty.
The Barrister's Challenge: A Regency Romance (Heirs of Berkshire Book 2) Page 6
