by Livia Grant
Once on her feet, she shuffled to the front door, not even taking the time to check who was on the other side of the wood panel before flinging it wide. Nothing could have prepared her for the sight that greeted her.
"Sean?"
"I'm happy you're sober enough to recognize me. I've been knocking for over fifteen minutes. I could see you passed out on the couch from the window. Now you come and open the door without even checking to see who it was? What if I was a robber or a rapist?"
"We're in Corbin's Bend. Nothing exciting ever happens in Corbin's Bend." The surprise of seeing Sean at her doorstep had nervous laughter accompanying her defensive response.
"This isn't a joke, Traci. And since when does having a robber or rapist at your door constitute excitement?"
Traci's reactions were sluggish, but she could feel the anger rolling off Sean as he stood on her front porch. She'd dreamed of this very scene since coming home from Chicago, although not once in her dreams were his grey eyes filled with anger. Her dream also hadn't pictured herself a disheveled mess like she was today. She shuffled her feet self-consciously as Sean examined every inch of her appearance before meeting her eyes again. There was only a brief second's warning of his intentions before he lunged across her threshold and grasped her upper arms in a firm grip, pulling her body tight against his chest.
She tried to defuse the situation. "Why are you here?"
"You don't even remember us talking last night, do you?"
Traci vaguely recollected a shameful conversation with Sean before getting sick to her stomach. She'd hoped it was just a nightmare. His tight grip on her arms proved otherwise. "Even if we talked, that doesn't explain why you're here."
"I'm here because I was worried about you. It's not every day a woman I care very much about calls me drunk and crying and then stumbles off to puke her guts out. I tried to call you over and over and could never get through. I was worried you were out somewhere, and might try to drive home. Then I pictured you passed out drunk, needing medical assistance, but not having anyone there to help you. I regretted not having Troy's phone number so he could come check on you."
Traci knew she'd dodged a major bullet. Troy would have wailed on her ass for drinking so much. Then the real implication of his words hit her. "Well, I'm sorry I cost you so much money having to come check on me yourself. As you can see, I'm alive and well so you can go now."
Sean's grip tightened. "Oh, Traci, you just try to get rid of me. I may have wanted to call Troy to check on you first, but nothing was going to stop me from getting on that plane. We have unfinished business."
Traci's unladylike snort shot another sharp pain into her throbbing head. "We could have finished our business over the phone, Sean. We both know it isn't going to work. We had a fun week together. I should have left on that Friday before..." She trailed off, unwilling to say what she really wanted to.
"Before I fucked things up on Saturday night. That's why I'm here, Traci. I've done my homework and I'm in a much better position to have that particular conversation again."
He was talking in code and she was too hung-over to understand. "I don't want to talk, Sean. My head hurts."
"That's fine by me. I don't really want to talk first either, although I plan on making a few other body parts of yours hurt very soon." His eyes took on a dark hue. She was normally good at picking up on people's body language, but she had to be wrong. She could swear Sean had the look she had seen dozens of times on Corbin's Bend HoH's as they took their submissive partner in hand. Despite her brain knowing she must be mistaken, her body reacted to his dominance by dissolving against him in submission.
They were close enough for her to smell his understated cologne that she loved so much. He hadn't taken the time to shave and the five o'clock shadow on his strong chin was sexier than hell. His well-worn jeans and a fitted T-shirt that showcased his toned body perfectly reminded her just how much she had lost when she had left Chicago.
He was talking again, barking orders. "Now, I want you to go into the bathroom and take a hot shower and wipe away the stench of alcohol while I clean up the remnants of your bender out here. I want you to brush your teeth good a time or two and then I want you to put on a yoga outfit and meet me back out here within the next thirty minutes. We're going to sit down and talk, among other things."
"But, Sean...."
"No buts."
Traci panicked at the disappointment she saw in his eyes. "I don't want to talk about it, Sean."
"That's fine by me, Traci. You can just listen at first. Then I have a few other important things planned that don't require talking."
She assumed he was talking about sex. Why else would he fly all the way to Corbin's Bend? "I'm not feeling very sexy."
"Oh, Traci, honey, feeling sexy is the last thing you should be worried about right now." He finally released her upper arms and spun her to face away from him. He scooted her off toward the back of the house with a firm slap to her ass to get her moving.
Traci's heart was in her throat as she finally realized he was talking about punishing her for making him worry. Despite the immediate dread the word punishment instilled in her, she couldn't deny the physical reaction of her body as she bowed to his dominance. She stalled, hoping to gather up the courage to follow his directions. His second slap to her other ass cheek finally got her moving. Her heart thumped hard enough that she could feel it constricting in her chest cavity.
She made her way to her en-suite bathroom and tried to calm her nerves while working through the dichotomy of emotions that raged through her. Sean was here. In Corbin's Bend. He might be mad, but he had cared enough to get on a plane to see her. That had to mean something.
When she caught her reflection in the large mirror, her heart dropped. She looked like death warmed over. Shame washed over her that Sean had not only seen her at her worst, but she had obviously made a fool of herself on the phone the night before. She sat on the toilet, throbbing head in her hands, and tried valiantly to remember their conversation. What could she have said that made him want to get on a plane to come here and insinuate he was going to spank her?
The hot shower helped revive her. She popped a few aspirin and applied some light makeup in an attempt to look less washed out. Drying her hair had taken a lot of time and since she hadn't looked at the time when she'd come into the bathroom, she suspected her thirty minutes was already up. Sean confirmed it with a loud knock to the door.
"You've had plenty of time in there, Traci. Time to come out to the kitchen."
He was gone when she cracked the door open a few minutes later. She headed to her closet and donned the loose-fitting yoga outfit before quietly making her way down the hall towards the open kitchen/living room. The welcome smell of coffee greeted her. Sean turned from the sink and approached her with a steaming cup of caffeine in one hand and a large glass of water in the other.
"You need to take in a lot of fluids. If the contents of your trash can are any indication, you are most likely dehydrated."
Traci felt the heat as she blushed with embarrassment. "Just leave the mess. I'll clean it up later."
"Too late. It's taken care of." She wanted to crawl under the nearby table to hide from Sean's stern gaze. "Drink the water, please."
Like a chastised child, she followed directions, downing half the tall glass of water. She hadn't realized how thirsty she'd been.
Sean didn't take his eyes off her. She felt as if she was under a microscope. After she drank it down, he took the glass back, turning to set both beverages down on the nearby island. She wasn't prepared for him to turn and pounce on her, snatching her into his arms and holding her tight against his chest before crushing his lips down on her own. There was urgency to his kiss, which was enhanced by his roaming hands. One hand grasped her ass while the other laced through her long hair. He pulled her hard against him with an urgent squeeze to her neck. The swell of his cock pressed against her tummy between them and had her legs tur
ning to Jell-O.
Sean saved her from wobbling over by scooping her into his arms. He strode to her couch and sat down with her snuggled into his lap. Traci buried her face in the crook of his neck, letting the smell of him calm her. She'd just about started to believe she would never feel his arms around her ever again, so his sudden appearance this morning had rocked her.
Traci's empty stomach churned, erupting into gurgles. She briefly worried she was about to throw up the water she'd just taken in, but the feeling passed. When Sean leaned back, he pulled her with him and held her close.
"Damn, I missed you, Traci. As worried as I was about you, I am glad you called. It gave me the push I needed to get my ass on a plane to come and sort things out."
Could she dare hope they might be able to piece together a relationship they would both be happy with? "It's okay, Sean. We live over a thousand miles apart. I'm not really sure what there is to sort out."
He lifted her chin to peer into her eyes. "Just like that, uh? Gonna give up without even trying?"
Traci's emotions were raw. She didn't guard herself. "I don't want to get hurt again, Sean. The only kinds of relationships I've had are the kind that don't end well. I like you... a lot. It hurt enough having things fall apart after only knowing each other for a week. I can't risk it being worse."
"Ah, Trace. What are you saying? You're prepared to be alone for the rest of your life because you don't want to risk getting hurt? I've been alone for a few years now and it sucks. You gave me a glimpse of what I was missing and I'll be honest, I want more. I've missed you."
"I've missed you too, Sean. I'm just not sure that's enough. I mean how is this supposed to work?"
"Well, for starters, I know the last night we were together I screwed up. I tried to move things too fast and I hadn't done my homework. I'm sorry about that and I promise you—I've spent many hours reading and researching on DD websites to make sure I know what I'm signing up for this time."
Traci's heart was pounding harder than her hung-over head at his words. "And? What have you found out?"
"First, I figured out how silly I must have looked to you that last night in Chicago." When Traci tried to reassure him, he cut her off. "It's okay. I know better now about the lifestyle in general, but more importantly, how I feel about what I've read. To be honest, I wasn't expecting to get caught up in this, yet I find myself dreaming of exploring a relationship of dominance and submission with you."
When Traci was too stunned to reply, Sean continued. "You don't even know how special you are, Traci. That's what gets to me the most. You are this beautiful, strong, intelligent woman who not only helps dozens of patients through therapy, but you're published, sharing valuable research data with hundreds of your colleagues. I'm so proud of that part of you, Traci. But more importantly, I'm honored that you've trusted me to see the other, more private part of yourself. The vulnerable young woman who needs... no wants... to allow a dominant man to guide her. I know you've been doing just fine on your own, but I'd really like a chance to see what we can do together... as a team."
How many times had she dreamed of a man saying those words to her? Of a man who was willing to explore the delicate balance of dominance and submission? But they still had so many obstacles to hurdle first. Like one thousand miles.
"I don't know what to say, Sean."
"Say I can stay the weekend. I have the next three days off and I'd like to spend it here with you trying to figure out what we're going to do next."
"I'd love nothing more, Sean, but then what? You fly back to Chicago on Monday night and things get awkward again?"
"Let's take it one day at a time, shall we? After you hear the rest of what I want to talk about, you may kick me to the curb before Monday, anyway."
"I doubt that. What else could you want to talk about that could be that bad?"
"Let me ask you a question. Do you remember back in Chicago when we were talking about DD for the first time? I mentioned the first and most important rule that I'd instill if I were ever your HoH?"
Traci remembered it well. She just never dreamed he would.
"You do remember, don't you?" He pressured her to answer.
"Yes, but—"
"I told you I would never allow you to put yourself down ever again. You are so fast to doubt your own self-worth, Traci. Don't you see how beautiful and intelligent you are? How you help so many others find happiness in their relationships, yet you don't think you're worth fighting for? Well, guess what. I've shown up ready to fight for you... for us. And step one is to tell you that I'd like a shot at becoming your HoH, Traci."
Sean held his breath and waited for Traci to respond. He'd practiced what he wanted to say in his head on the plane. He hadn't planned on blurting it out like he just had, but regardless, he was relieved to have the words in the open. He just wished she would say something.
"Trace..."
"I'm sorry, Sean. Can you repeat that please? I don't think I heard you right?"
"You heard me just fine. I want to be your HoH. I'd like to know what you think about the idea."
"There are so many problems with that statement, I don't know where to start."
Sean pushed down his insecurity with her response. "Start wherever you'd like. I want to hear everything on your mind."
"Well, for starters, we don't live in the same household. We don't even live in the same state."
"That's geography. Set it aside for now. What else you got?"
She hesitated as if she were unsure if she should say what was on her mind. After she got started, Sean wished he'd never pressed her. "How about the fact that you had never even heard of domestic discipline until a few weeks ago? Or that you hate the idea of punishing me? Or that you have Ashley to consider before starting any kind of relationship? Add the fact I don't want to move away from my brother. There are no hotels to manage in Corbin's Bend. We've only known each other for the blink of an eye and you could change your mind once we spend more time together. I am a terrible drinker and know nothing about picking out good wines. I—"
Sean placed two fingers to her lips to shush her. "I think that's enough to start with, don't you?" He'd expected all of her arguments, well except the lame wine-drinking excuse. He let the grin he'd been suppressing come.
"Let's see if I can put a few of those to rest. We'll go backwards. First, I'll be happy to teach you all I know about picking out wines and I'm sure I can be very persuasive when it comes to making sure you don't over-indulge in the future. As for Ashley, she loves you. After you left, she told me about meeting you in the ladies room your first day in Chicago. At first I was upset that you'd hidden knowing her from me, but after I calmed down, I totally respected you for it. Thank you for being there for Ashley when she needed an adult to guide her and she sure as hell wasn't inclined to listen to her dad. She already liked you from your first meeting, but by keeping her secret from me, you showed her she could trust you. She is in such a fragile place right now and I'm so grateful you're a guiding force for her."
"Oh thank God she told you. I had been feeling guilty about withholding her smoking from you. I know she wasn't a patient at the time, but the private conversation we had just seemed privileged to me. I'm glad you understand."
"I do. Next rebuttal. I may not have heard about DD before I met you, but I've made up for lost time since you left Chicago, reading up on everything I can get my hands on. I'm not sure how you're going to feel about the fact that I find myself thinking of turning you over my knee, spanking that beautiful ass of yours, at the oddest times of the day. Sitting in meetings, eating breakfast, reading emails. You name it, and the time has been interrupted by the images in my head."
"DD is a lot more than just the fun kind of spanking, Sean. In fact, it's more than just spanking, period."
"So I've learned. It's more than just punishments. It's about rules and guidelines of how we want to live. It's about communicating in a way that makes us a team, agreeing to conseq
uences under specific conditions." He felt his smile broadening to a grin. "The fact that I can't read even the most mundane DD blogs without getting a raging hard-on is just a plus."
"Oh God... I don't know, Sean." He could tell she was softening.
"Let's talk about the hardest objection. Geography. I don't want to make you move away from your brother and sister-in-law either. I did some homework and found there are no hotels nearby for me to manage either, so you're right, this could pose a problem for a less resourceful couple. But we are smart people and I'm positive we can come up with a solution. The question is, if I could solve the geography problem, would you agree to give a DD relationship with me a shot?"
Traci didn't reply so he pushed forward.
"Maybe before you answer, you should know what I have planned if you say yes."
"Planned?"
"Yes, for your first punishment. While we need to sit down and talk through our rules, I feel I've already warned you about putting yourself down. Back in Chicago, I made it clear that if we were ever in a DD relationship, I'd never put up with your self-doubt and undervaluing what an amazing woman you are, Traci Jackson. Yet, you drank until you made yourself sick, spiraling into a bout of self-pity and self-hate. You had me worried and then you wouldn't answer your phone to tell me you were okay. So the ball is in your court, baby. I won't so much as pat your ass again without your consent, but I hope I'm clear. That's what I'm asking for here. I'd like your consent."
"Consent to... what?" Her question came out in a high-pitched squeak.
Sean stared into her caramel brown eyes and carefully watched her reaction to his next words. "Consent to bare that beautiful ass of yours, of course. Then I'm going to lay you across my lap and give you a long, hard spanking until I think you've learned your lesson. If I can't make that happen with my hand alone, I'll be happy to use my leather belt or that wooden hairbrush you told me you hate so much. In a nutshell, I'm asking for your consent to take you in hand."
