“Really?” She scrunched her brows and wondered what he meant.
“I won’t let him do that.”
She tilted her head. “I don’t understand.”
“There’s more to it than anyone knows.”
She didn’t want to push him, but she didn’t have to. As he looked at her, his eyes watered. “There’s something I should tell you about that night. But you might wish you’d never helped me in the first place once I do.”
Jenna’s stomach churned with dread as she wondered what he was going to say.
He blew out another breath. “I was a terrible person a few months ago, but I never had any intentions of hurting Kendra.”
She listened as he told her about that night. About how he was responsible for the drugs showing up in Kendra’s body, and how he had to confess the truth instead of allowing everyone, including her parents, to believe she used drugs when she didn’t.
When he finished, Jenna knew that Mitch expected her to turn away in disgust. There was a part of her that was truly appalled by his behaviour and the fact that he’d done such a thing. But mostly, she respected him for his honesty. Not only that, but the fact that he was deciding to face the consequences rather than cast blame onto Kendra.
“Mitch, you amaze me. It proves how far you’ve come and how much you’ve changed.”
He gave a small shrug. “I have to be honest about it. I have to tell the truth, or I’d have to live with the guilt forever—the knowledge that I was too much of a coward and that I allowed her reputation to be tainted. I couldn’t do that.”
“When’s your hearing?”
“Next week. I’m going to confess everything and plead guilty. I have to.”
“I’ll be there, okay? I’ll be with you. And I’ll visit often and pray for you every step of the way.”
“Thank you.”
On the day of Mitch’s hearing, Jenna sat anxiously beside Kyle in the courtroom. As Mitch read a statement, admitting not only to the charges against him, but to having given Kendra speed, her heart broke all over again for him, but she also felt proud of him.
Collective gasps sounded around the courtroom; Kendra’s parents sobbed. Jenna couldn’t imagine how they felt at that moment, but she assumed it would be a relief to hear that their daughter hadn’t made the poor choices everyone thought she had. It wouldn’t bring her back, but at least they knew the truth.
Jenna turned her gaze to James Carmichael and Alexander Freeman. James was glaring at his son. It seemed he’d rather have Mitch tarnish the woman’s reputation and hide the truth from her parents than for Mitch to take responsibility for his actions, which seemed a contradiction since he had refused to pay the fine before Kendra died.
Because he’d pleaded guilty, there was no need for a long, drawn out court case, and the judge sentenced him to five years. With good behaviour, he could be out on probation in two.
Jenna brushed tears from her eyes and prayed for him as he was led away. Lord, bless Mitch for being prepared to accept his punishment. Work in his heart, dear Lord, and keep him safe in prison.
Making her way out of the courthouse, she turned when she heard her name called. It was Marylin, Mitch’s mother, and her face was flushed and her cheeks damp. Jenna stepped towards her and hugged her. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. You’ve been the one bright spot for Mitch in all of this.” Marylin brushed her cheek. “Not only that, if it weren’t for you, I doubt he would have had the strength to do what he did today. I was so proud of him.”
Jenna nodded. “I was too. It was the right thing to do.”
“I give you a lot of the credit for the changes in him. You gave him the courage to look at himself. To face his mistakes. Thank you for caring for him enough to do that.”
Tears of relief found their way to Jenna’s eyes. After doubting herself and her motives, it was great to know that his mother appreciated her. “It’s been my pleasure, but it was Mitch who made the decision to come clean.”
“He wouldn’t have done that without your input. You’ve done more good than you know.”
Chapter 19
The first week in jail was torture. Mitch tried to keep to himself, but he was the new guy, and in jail, that wasn’t the easiest position to be in, especially when you were Mitchell Carmichael and everyone knew it. At least he had his own cell.
He felt for Jenna the first time she came to visit. She was greeted by catcalls and whistles, and he found himself wanting to protect her when she walked into the visitors’ area.
“Hey,” he greeted as she sat opposite him. She looked more beautiful than he remembered and his heart did a flip as she flicked her hair over her shoulder.
“Hey, yourself. How are you doing?” Her eyes pooled with tears, and he felt bad that she had to see him this way.
“Never better,” he joked, running a hand nervously through his hair.
“Seriously?”
“Not really. But I’ll be fine. It’ll take some getting used to, but it took time getting used to living with Kyle and Yonas.”
“This is way different.”
“Oh, I don’t know. Living with them was kind of like my first prison.” He let out a small chuckle.
“They’d like to come and visit. Is that okay?”
“Sure. It’s not like I have any other friends.”
Her brow furrowed and he saw pity in her eyes. “That’s so sad. You have me.”
Her voice was soft and he wanted her more than ever. Maybe it was the prospect of being incarcerated for so long, cut off from the real world, that made the longing worse, but the truth was, he’d fallen in love with her. He smiled. “I know. And you don’t know how much that means to me.”
She quickly averted her gaze. “I brought something for you.” She pulled a Bible out of a plastic bag and handed it to him. “I thought you might like to read it while you’re in here.”
He lifted a brow, unsure of what to say. Kyle had prayed for him the night after Kendra died. Read passages from the Bible to try to comfort him and give him hope, but he’d never read it for himself. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Read the New Testament first. It’ll make more sense. And we can chat about it each time I come if you like.”
“Okay. I’ll give it a try.”
“Great.”
Chapter 20
Although Mitch had changed a lot from when he’d first arrived in her ward several months earlier, and she couldn’t deny the way her stomach fizzed when their gazes met, Jenna was still cautious about growing too attached to him. She knew he could easily return to his former lifestyle when he was released from jail, especially if he fell in with a bad crowd while he was inside, so she decided to maintain a safe distance.
However, when she visited him again later that week, her resolve weakened, especially when he told her he’d been trying to read the Bible.
“That’s great! What did you read?”
“The New Testament, like you said.”
“The whole of it?”
“Yes.”
“Really?” She was gob-smacked.
“That’s what you told me to do.”
She laughed. “I hadn’t expected you to read the whole thing.”
He shrugged. “Nothing better to do in here.”
“I guess not. So, what did you think?”
“It was confusing to start with, but when I read the Jesus words, you know, the red ones, I started to understand why you’re the way you are.”
A new and unexpected warmth surged through her. “That’s such a kind thing to say.”
“I mean it, Jenna. I’ve never met anyone like you before. You’re amazing.”
She gulped and changed the topic. “So, do you now think someone can live a life full of meaning without money?”
He chuckled. “I’m seeing that it’s possible. Jesus didn’t have any money, but look at how He influenced the world.”
Jenna nodded. “You’re righ
t. He had very little, but He gave so much.”
“Yeah, and He’s still famous thousands of years later.”
“He never looked for fame, but it came as a result of what He did.”
“I don’t get how Him dying was a good thing.”
She was ready to dive into a full explanation when the guard called time. It was incredibly frustrating to know that she’d been given a perfect chance to present the Gospel but couldn’t. “Can we talk more about this when I come back? There’s so much I’d like to explain.”
“Sure. I’ll be here.”
“Ha ha.” Jenna left the prison with hope welling within her. She sensed that Mitch was ready to hear the truth of the gospel message, and prayed that he would come to know Jesus as his personal Lord and Saviour very soon.
However, it wasn’t up to her. It was up to God to work in his heart. She would continue to ask Him to keep working in Mitch until the day came that his eyes were fully opened to the truth of the gospel message and he surrendered his life fully to the One who could give him not only new life filled with meaning and purpose in the here and now, but the promise of eternity with Him in the life to come.
Chapter 21
Jail life was unbearably mundane and basic, totally unlike anything Mitch had experienced before. Without the visits from Jenna, Kyle, Yonas, and his mother, he would have gone crazy. He was always watching his back and was grateful he’d kept some muscle tone to help ward off those who meant him harm.
And for the last two weeks, he’d taken solace in reading the Bible Jenna had given him. Although he didn’t understand it all, the words gave him comfort in a place where little comfort was to be found.
Whenever he could, he read it. It was like he was drawn to it, and he sensed a shift in his heart as the words started to come alive and Jesus seemed real for the first time. It was no longer just a name he abused. It was a name that gave him peace whenever he uttered it or read it.
Each time he closed the book at the end of the night, when he shut his eyes to try and sleep, the words continued to resound in his heart and mind. Usually it was just a few words. Small things that stood out. But one night, he came across a verse he’d read before but this time cut him to the core. Mark chapter eight, verse thirty-six. For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and forfeit his soul?
He took a sharp breath and read the verse again. That was it. In that moment, he finally grasped the disconnect between what he’d been reading and what he wasn’t understanding. Until now, Jesus seemed like an amazing man, perhaps even God, but Mitch couldn’t understand what that meant for him personally. Until this moment. This verse.
His heart began to pound as if something was speaking directly to him. It was a voice he recognised but was not quite familiar. Like something he’d known of from afar, but he’d never truly listened to.
He read the verse a third, then a fourth time and broke down in tears. Deep within his heart, he welled up, knowing he’d lost his soul. He’d devoted his life to gaining the world and its trappings, but it meant nothing. It had only brought him pain. And not just him. It had brought pain to Kendra’s family as well. He could never forgive himself for that.
His whole life had been meaningless. He’d lost his soul. Was it too late to regain it? Was there any hope for him? He knew that all the things about sin and sinners that he’d read applied to him. It made him feel sick. He’d done so many wrong things.
Jenna had said something once. He wished he could remember each word, but it was something to the effect of, we have to realise the weight of our sin before we can understand the freedom of grace.
The freedom of grace. He didn’t understand it, but it sounded good. He needed to talk to someone. If only Jenna were here. He couldn’t wait until her next visit. He’d see the chaplain.
The guard came by and Mitch called for him. “Hey, is the chaplain still here?”
The guard returned to Mitch’s door and eyed him warily. “Why, do you want to see him?”
Mitch gulped. “Yes.”
“I’ll check.”
“Thank you.” While Mitch waited for the guard to return, he sat on his bed and bowed his head. He thought he didn’t know how to pray, but the words flowed freely from his heart.
God, I know I’ve messed up. I’ve been chasing after this world, trying to profit from it, but in the process I’ve ruined so much. Caused a young woman to lose her life. I don’t know how I can ever forgive myself for that. Even if I spent the rest of my life in jail, I don’t know that that would be enough. I’m so, so sorry. Change my heart, God. I don’t deserve Your mercy or love, but I don’t want this life anymore. Tears rolled down his cheeks as a deep acceptance of his sinful nature flooded his inner being.
The guard returned and Mitch quickly wiped his face with the back of his hand. “The chaplain can see you for a few moments before lights out. Follow me.”
Mitch rose and followed. He’d spent his whole life with the lights out. For the first time, he thought they might be turning on.
As he sat before the chaplain, he shared everything that had just happened in his cell.
“So, you want a changed life? You want to regain your soul?”
“If that’s possible, yes.”
“It’s more than possible. That was the whole purpose of Jesus coming to earth and living as a human. Although He was God, He took on the sin of the world when He died on the cross, including yours and mine, and because He rose again, He now offers new life to all those who believe in Him. Your soul can be renewed if you renounce your sinful ways and accept Him as your Lord and Saviour. Do you want to do that?”
“Yes please. I’ve had all that this world has to offer and it got me nowhere. I don’t want it anymore. I want this.”
“Are you sure? It’s not something you should do lightly.”
“Yes. I’m tired of living the way I have been.”
“Okay, then. That’s wonderful. We’ll pray and you can invite Jesus into your heart.”
Mitch bowed his head, and as they prayed, he knew with confidence that Jesus had heard. His soul had been renewed and he now was a child of God. He’d gained eternity, forgiveness, and mercy. And nothing would ever remain the same for him.
When Jenna came to visit him a couple of days later, he told her his news. Tears welled in her eyes and he wished he could hold her.
“That’s wonderful, Mitch. I’m so excited for you.”
“I feel different already, like I have a new heart or something.”
She smiled. “You have, Mitch. You’ve just undergone heart surgery.”
He smiled at that and told her he was seeing the chaplain every morning. “He’s counseling me through some of the things I’m finding hard to understand. I wish I’d read that verse years ago. If only I’d known what it meant, maybe Kendra would still be alive.”
“God’s forgiven you, Mitch, now you have to forgive yourself. Nothing will bring her back, but her death needn’t be in vain. I’m sure God has something up His sleeve. Your future is in His hands now, so look to Him. He has a plan for your life, even if you don’t see it yet.”
And for the first time, Mitch felt he had something to look forward to other than a party.
Chapter 22
The transformation that occurred in Mitch over the following months was truly amazing. Jenna was grateful to God for having brought him this far, and whenever she visited him, she felt herself overwhelmed with joy. He was a new man, changed and redeemed in every way. His story had taken a dramatic turn and Jenna praised God for it. She also dared to dream that maybe they had a future together.
Sometimes, when they were sitting opposite each other during her weekly visits, she caught him noticing her intently and she had to fight her overwhelming desire to be held by him. Once, when their fingers touched, she felt a lurch of excitement within her. Even so, they could be no more than friends. She knew that, so she went home and prayed for strength for them both.
&n
bsp; Month after month, week after week, she visited him. And as she watched him grow in Christ, she fell deeper and deeper in love with him. Each time she saw him, his face was brighter. He was humbler, kinder, and had even grown a desire to serve others. Grief and awareness of the behaviour that had led to him being in jail were still present, but had been tempered with mercy and grace.
He was learning to live with the consequences of what he’d done rather than dwelling in self-hatred. But he wanted to atone. To make amends.
One day he told her how he wished he’d seen her heart before he’d seen her beauty. He regretted treating her so disrespectfully in the early days when he first arrived in her ward.
Jenna let him know, time and time again, that she’d forgiven him. They were past all of that and they could move on. Although he was no longer burdened by guilt, it was quite evident he still lived with regret.
He’d taken full responsibility for everything that happened. He’d even written to Kendra’s family, apologising for his actions, expecting nothing in return. Jenna was sad that they never replied to him, but she understood. It was such a sad situation for them.
They were suffering, and she watched as Mitch knew he was the reason for it. Still, she admired the way he cared about them. Jenna appreciated how he was trying to make amends even for something he knew he could never change.
On the day of Mitch’s one-year anniversary of his sentencing, Jenna and Kyle went to see him.
“Hey man, how are you doing?” Kyle asked.
“I’m doing okay. It’s kind of crazy that it’s been a whole year,” Mitch replied.
“Yeah, I can hardly believe it.”
“I’m glad that one is down. I won’t lie, there are days I wish I could be free, but I’m grateful that God is using me in here,” Mitch said.
Jenna had noticed when they arrived that Mitch had been chatting with a few of the other inmates, and that they seemed to respect him.
Billionaires with Heart Boxset: Christian Romance Series Page 31
