He was going to have to try harder.
He put his glass on the kitchen counter, then prised her glass from her fingers, placed it beside his, and kissed her again—this time, tugging her against him so she was close enough to feel the hardness of his arousal, large and straining, as his hands ran feverishly down her back, forcing her still closer.
When he finally stepped away and looked down at her, she was halfway to panting. He fully intended to get her the whole way there.
‘I’ve been imagining you naked, with your beautiful hair hanging here—’ he said, voice thick with desire as he touched the tips of her breasts through the yellow cloth ‘—and the colour of it here—’ one hand sliding down over her belly. ‘Take off your dress.’
Something flashed across Lane’s face—shock, followed closely by excitement. He could recognize excitement; he was fizzing with it himself.
Lane looked around. ‘But we’re in the kitchen.’
‘Lesson One. Anywhere, any time.’
She swallowed, licked her lips nervously, but his ace student did as she was told, grasping the hem of her dress and raising it slowly up and over her head. She stood before him, naked except for her panties, and for once they were deliberately sexy. Cream silk and lace. He wanted to tear them to shreds to get at her. Slow the hell down.
‘I haven’t given you the champagne lesson yet,’ he said, and proceeded to dip his finger into his glass then trace liquid circles around her nipples.
First she sucked in her breath … and then, as he proceeded to lick the champagne off, exhaled in a rush.
‘You’re delicious,’ Adam told her, dipping his finger back in the glass, tracing her nipples again. ‘Do you like that, Lane?’
‘Yes,’ she managed to breathe out.
‘Do you want me, Lane?’
‘Yes. Yes, I do, Adam.’
And as she gasped those words out one more time: ‘Yes I do’, Adam knew he’d reached the point where he could no longer deny either of them. He wanted her desperately. And she wanted him. He only had to look at her. See the flushed passion in her face. Feel the fine trembling of her body. Hear the helpless whimpering in the back of her throat each time he touched her. He’d burrowed his way under her skin, like he’d planned. And now it was time.
He drew her into his arms. Heard her sigh his name as he kissed her temple. Oh, she wanted him all right.
Something in his chest constricted as he reiterated those words in his mind.
She wanted him. She wanted him. She … she … hmm.
Those words were somehow wrong, no matter which way he emphasized them.
He tried to shake off the vague dissatisfaction. Kissed her again. She’d told him she wanted him. What more was there to know? There was nothing wrong with being wanted just for sex. It was perfect for someone like him. Mr Love-’em-and-leave-’em Quinn. Perfect. They were both going to get what they wanted—each other’s bodies for a finite period. It was all she wanted from him. All he had to give. It was enough.
Like hell it was!
‘Lane?’
‘Hmm …?’
‘We need to talk.’
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
It was like an icy bucket of water, and Lane, appropriately, froze.
Adam wanted to talk, when for once all she wanted to do was feel. Feel his breath against her skin, his tongue and his hands working their magic on her body.
She thought there’d been something different about him tonight. Something in the way he’d touched her. As though he couldn’t help himself, as though it was more than a paid job, as though it was going to happen, if only she could manage not to do anything to spoil the mood this time. She thought he really, actually, finally wanted her, as much as she wanted him.
But instead, he wanted to stop and talk.
Maybe she would have been able to cope with that, but reliving her eleventh birthday, talking about her father, her mother, had made her needier than usual. God, how she hated being needy, but she couldn’t help it. She was craving something, something she knew he could give her. A touch, a taste, a chance to just be in the moment.
But … no. They were back to where they’d always been. He didn’t want her that way; she’d only imagined that he ever could.
She pulled out of his arms and looked at him. ‘Talk about what, exactly?’ she asked, because she would not lose herself again, not until she knew what was in his head.
‘The lessons. The contract.’
‘The contract, I see,’ she said—but all she really saw was that she was making a fool of herself over Adam Quinn, and it was time to stop. She scooped her dress up off the floor, slid it over her head, smoothed it into place. ‘Are there certain clauses you want to discuss—say, the termination clause?’
Adam frowned. ‘I wasn’t thinking along those li—’
‘How about we talk about how cold I am? So cold, no man will ever want to touch me, even when I’m paying for it. That’s got to be worth breaking a contract over.’
‘What? No! That’s not—’
‘I told you what happened, Adam. It was a hard lesson to learn, not to ask for too much attention after my father died. Not to let it show, how much I want—’ Her breath hitched. ‘How much I care when—’ Another hitch, and she stopped, unable to bear the loss of control. Rewording required. ‘Let’s just say it knocked that bit of wildness out of me. It … tamed me. Put me on a tight leash. It taught me not to beg for what I can’t have. And all of that is what you see as cold. The thing is, I’m such a good student that once I learn my lessons I never forget them. I haven’t forgotten that one in twelve years—no, it’s almost thirteen years, and I’m not likely to forget it now, am I? I doubt I’ll forget it when it becomes fourteen or fifteen or even thirty years.’
Adam moved towards her, as though he’d take her in his arms, but Lane stepped back from him and continued. ‘I can’t turn the cold tap off, even though I know that—I know how—’ She stopped again, jerking in a breath. ‘How hard it is to want someone like me.’
‘Lane, please—’
Again she cut him off. ‘That’s what the lessons with you were supposed to be about. Camouflage. To teach me how to appear a way that I’m not, so that I can turn men on, not off. But they’re not working, are they, these lessons? You told me, that first night, a stud like you needs it regularly—and this is not regular. That means I’m failing the class.’
‘No!’
He reached for her again, and again she pulled away. ‘If I were passing the course, I’d have made you need me regularly by now. But I’m so cold, I can’t make you need anything from me.’
‘Stop saying that! You’re not cold.’
‘You told me I was.’
‘Yeah, but that was when … I was just …’ He shoved both his hands through his hair. ‘Ah, Jesus Christ.’
‘Actually, that first night, you said you needed it good and regular. And I’m not any good, am I? Otherwise you would have done it to me by now. I don’t even know why you’re still coming here.’
‘Because I care about what happens to you, all right? I care about what happens next.’
‘How about you leave me to care about what happens next,’ she said, and turned towards the counter, moving the champagne glasses to one spot, then another, just for something to occupy her tense fingers.
What happens next? It was becoming clear there wouldn’t be a ‘next’. She had nothing to take to her ‘next’. No skills. No allure. Nothing to offer a man like David Bennett. If anything, she’d gone backwards, because now she wasn’t even sure she wanted David Bennett. She couldn’t seem to think past wanting Adam.
‘I thought this thing with me was all about what happens next, Lane,’ he said, coming up behind her. She could feel his hands hovering over her shoulders, as though they wanted to land there.
‘Yes,’ she said, stiffening her shoulders as some sort of pathetic Keep Out gesture. �
��But I’m not paying you to care about me.’
The hands landed before she could finish, and she was spun so fast to face Adam, she stumbled right into chest.
‘Don’t you dare start talking about what you’re paying me for!’ he said, blazing down at her.
She pulled herself free. ‘Yes, yes, Lesson Six. Men are proud bastards. But the fact is, I am paying you. The perfect arrangement—you get a willing body, and a fee, and you don’t even have to make a commitment, because I don’t want one—not from you.’ She took a slow, quaking breath. ‘It should be so easy for you. But instead you stop, when we’re almost there, to talk!’
‘All right, then we won’t talk.’
‘It’s too late to say that.’
‘Ah, Lane, don’t you get it? Don’t you see—’
‘I do see. I see this arrangement isn’t working, no matter how many so-called “lessons” you invent to cover up the fact.’ She help up a hand as he opened his mouth to speak. ‘And if you’re going to refute that you’ve been inventing lessons to stall me, don’t bother, because I won’t believe you. I’ve figured it out, Adam. I know you’ve been stalling.’ She touched her fingers to her lips to stop their sudden trembling. ‘In any case it doesn’t matter any more.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘That means you can consider your duty discharged. My pride can’t take any more. I’m accepting that you are indeed my comeuppance.’
‘I told you I wouldn’t let you fail.’
‘You didn’t let me. I did it all on my own. So you’re free to go. We’re done.’
‘Oh no we’re not.’
‘Then I’m done, and you’re still free to go.’
‘We have a contract. You’re not done.’
‘You don’t care about the contract. You never have.’
‘I signed, didn’t I?’
‘Yes, but it hasn’t got us very far, so let’s both save our dignity and stop this. I’ve known from the start you weren’t attracted to me, but I was so stupid, I didn’t think that was necessary. I realize now that the sexual mechanics aren’t enough. It’s time I came to terms with the fact that I’m probably never going to get to the mechanics. I just don’t have what it takes to attract a man, and it’s not worth wasting any more time over.’
‘But I am attracted to you. You’ve felt the evidence pressed against you enough times to know that.’
‘I know you’ve gone two weeks without sex, and from what I’ve heard of your track record, you must be very frustrated by now. I dare say you’d be “attracted” to a blow-up doll at this point.’
He looked incredulous. ‘You’re not seriously comparing yourself to a blow-up doll.’
‘Goodness, no. I’m sure she’d get more action out of you than I have.’
He sucked in a half-laughing breath, then pushed it out as a long sigh. ‘Okay, Lane, if you’re done making me feel like a complete bastard, can you come here so I can show you how much I do, I really do, want to get us to “consummation” tonight?’
She felt the tears start to her eyes and blinked them furiously away. ‘No.’
‘Please, Lane?’
‘No. I’ll get what I owe you deposited into your account and we’ll call it quits.’
‘If you mention money one more time—’
‘You’ll what? “Spank” me?’
‘If you want me to.’
‘You’re not getting it, are you? It has to be about what you want or it’s meaningless.’
‘Easy. I want you.’
‘No, Adam, you don’t. Or you would have had me by now.’
‘I do. I have from the start.’
‘Then what’s been stopping you?’
‘I just wanted you to—’ He broke off, darted his hand over his head. ‘This doesn’t reflect well on me, but I … I was annoyed.’
‘Annoyed? You cannot expect me to bel—’
‘Annoyed, seriously annoyed. That first night. I was annoyed at how … how unmoved you were by the whole idea of sex with me. All that talk about technique and experience, but no real sign there was anything special about … about—’ He broke off again, gave a short, hard laugh. ‘God this is embarrassing.’ He took a deep breath. ‘Here goes. I wanted to make you acknowledge that there’s more to sex than technique. That I was important. Not because of my skills, but because—’ Another short laugh as he squeezed his eyes closed. ‘I cannot believe I’m talking about myself like this, what a total wanker, please don’t tell Sarah.’ He opened his eyes. Another deep breath. ‘I wanted to make you acknowledge that I was important, because … because it’s … me.’
Lane shook her head, bemused. ‘But of course you’re important.’
‘Come on, Lane, anyone would have done that night, and you know it.’
‘But after that night—’
‘After that night? Well, you haven’t exactly been falling all over yourself—or over me—with uncontrollable desire. I think you might have given me a complex.’
‘You do not have a complex.’
‘No thanks to you!’
‘But I … I have wanted to fall all over you, Adam. I’m just not confident enough to do it.’
‘So fall now, Lane. I’m here, waiting, ready.’
‘You didn’t like it when I … when I fell the last time.’
‘When you fell?’ he asked slowly.
‘You hated it when I touched your … you know … You said there was a problem with the way I touched you that made it impossible to proceed. You said all men would have that problem with me.’
He started laughing. ‘When you touched my “you know”?’
‘It’s not funny.’
‘Lane, Lane, Lane. I don’t know exactly what I said—as I recall I was too far gone in lust to respond with more than one brain cell—but it wasn’t anything about not liking you touching me. It would have been more a case of liking it too much. So much that I was about to lose control of myself.’ He stopped, laughed suddenly. ‘I knew I’d stuffed that up. Really, I am an idiot.’
‘So are you saying it’s no more difficult to make love to me than to anyone else?’ she asked. ‘Even though I don’t ooze sex appeal like you do?’
Adam’s eyes lit. ‘You think I ooze sex appeal?’
Lane rolled her eyes. It was so obvious it didn’t require anything to be said.
‘Really, Lane?’
‘Yes, really. Okay?’
‘So how about I ooze now?’ he asked.
‘You always ooze.’
‘I mean, ooze with a purpose.’
‘A … a purpose? I don’t understand.’
‘Let me show you that not only is it not more difficult to make love to you than to any other woman, but it might actually be easier.’
‘Oh,’ Lane said shakily.
‘But you have to ooze with me. We can do a joint ooze.’
‘I don’t think I can ooze.’
‘You ooze just fine,’ Adam said, and then he grabbed her, jerked her in. ‘Kiss me, Lane.’
Her heart was pound, pound, pounding. She was oozing, all right. She may just ooze into a puddle on the floor, because she felt like she was melting, just from the heat in his eyes. Oh God, she wanted him.
‘Do you mean it?’ she asked breathlessly. ‘You really want me to kiss you?’
‘I want you to kiss me. I want it so much I’m going to drop dead if you don’t. You don’t want to kill me, do you?’
‘Not at the moment.’
‘I’m waiting, my mouth is waiting, my tongue is waiting.’
Rising up on her toes, Lane tentatively fitted her mouth to his. Instantly his arms tightened around her, vice-like. She grew bolder, flicking her tongue across his lips, darting it into his mouth, because she loved it when he did that to her.
‘A kiss is always a good place to start,’ he said huskily when she paused at last and eased back to look at him. ‘Now pu
t your hands on me and let’s go further.’
‘I’m going to start with your face,’ she said, and when he smiled, she reached to trace the tiny lines around his eyes. ‘I like these,’ she said.
‘I’m glad.’
She felt along his eyebrows next, paying special attention to his damaged one. Then down his nose. Slid her fingertips over the firm curve of his mouth. Soon, that exploration wasn’t enough, and her hands were at his jaw, then dipping lower, into the hollow of throat revealed through the open neck of his shirt.
Before long, she was tugging his shirt free of his jeans, sliding her hands up inside, against the skin of his abdomen, tracing the narrow line of rough hair, up to his chest, skimming her fingertips around each nipple. Impatiently, she pushed his shirt up so that she could see where her hands wandered.
The champagne. What he’d done to her. Could she taste him like that …?
Before she could talk herself out of it, she dipped her finger into her glass and traced his nipples, ducking her head to suck first one, then the other.
‘Lane,’ he said in a strange voice.
She’d been so intent on what she was doing, the strangled voice startled her.
She looked up quickly. ‘Have I done something wrong?’
‘No, sweetheart,’ he said, strained. ‘But we need to do this. Like right now.’
Her eyes lit up. ‘Really?’
‘Really. Right. Now.’
She ducked her head, gave each of his nipples one last flick with her tongue. ‘You’re sure?’
‘Oh, yes.’
‘About time.’
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
It took ages to get to the bedroom. But Adam didn’t mind, because the delay was the result of Lane halting him with a touch every step he took, running her hands over his backside, up inside his shirt, across his back, his neck, his chest, his hair, down his arms … anywhere she could reach.
It seemed that now she had the green light to touch him, she was never going to stop. Every time he moaned, she giggled with delight, and that only made him want her more. They finally made it into the bedroom and she all but threw herself into his arms.
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