by Jillian Hart
She couldn’t say what drew her out of the warm bed. Certainly not the chilly floor that turned her stocking feet to ice. Or the air that sent goose bumps dancing across her skin as she reached for slippers and housecoat. She wrapped the quilted garment around her, glad for its warmth, and snuck over to the window seat to pull on the knitted booties she'd made.
Her hand pulled back the drapes, as if a part of her already knew. As if somewhere down deep, her soul felt his nearness.
That couldn’t be possible, she told herself logically, firmly, it was just wishful thinking. Zane was far away, and the night was too inclement for anyone to be out in it, much less travel in it. But she looked out the window anyway, anticipation popping through her, pulse zipping, heart needing.
She wasn't surprised to see the faint outline of a man standing at the edge of the lawn, hands on his hips, brawny shoulders wide, Stetson at a low angle. She caught the familiar line of his iron jaw, saw his head tip up when he spotted her in the window. It was far too dark to make out his face, but she felt his smile. Felt his gladness at seeing her.
Zane. He'd come. Sooner than he'd said, in the middle of the night, and he was here. Joy winged through her, and she lifted her hand to wave. Felt the impact of his gaze even though she could not see it, like his presence in her heart. Down below, the man strode out of sight. She leaped off the window seat, running to the door.
"I'll be so glad when I get my own room," Rose muttered, rolled on her side and pulled her pillow over her head.
"Sorry," Verbena whispered, wrenching open the door. "It's him. Oh, he came!"
"Glad you're not sweet on him or anything," Rose mumbled from beneath the pillow.
Verbena didn't even bother to argue. What was the point? She was more than sweet on him, judging by the way her feet carried her down the hall, the steps and to the back door. Zane's silhouette filled the window and she couldn't turn the knob fast enough. Oh, it was so good to see him.
"You must be frozen clear through." She stepped back, out of the stinging bite of the bitter cold, drinking him in with her eyes. The hard manly lines of him, the curve of arm and shoulder, the substantial pad of his step. "Hurry, get in here where it's warm."
"Sure, but for the record, I'm not a stalker or anything." The deep notes of his voice held hints of humor as he closed the door behind him. Iciness radiated off him like a glacier. "I got in about thirty minutes ago."
"You must have really pushed hard."
"You have no idea." He towered over her, shrinking the room, dominating the night. "As soon as I got my horses rubbed down, in a warm stall and fed, I had to come here. I didn't mean to wake you."
"You didn't." She stood there in the middle of the kitchen, so filled up with the thrill of being with him, the excitement that he'd done so much, ridden so hard, just to come to her. That he was here, when she'd missed him so deeply. She wanted to throw her arms around his broad shoulders, feel his steely arms closing around her. She wanted to see those same emotions in his eyes.
"You were just up staring out the window anyway?" he asked, a touch wryly.
"As a matter of fact, yes." She didn't know how to say it, or how much to risk. If he knew how she felt, that he'd somehow claimed her entire heart, would that make him uncomfortable? Would he bolt?
Or would he declare the same? She didn't know, but it was too big of a risk to take when she knew the outcome. When any woman could see Zane Reed was not husband material. "It was excellent timing, wasn't it? I looked out the window and there you were."
"I couldn't make myself leave." His confession held no traces of emotion, as if he held all of it back. "I had to see that everything was normal here. That's what I've worked hard for. So that your life can go on the way it was meant to be. Safe, happy, good."
"Thanks to you." She tipped her head back to look up at him, squinting to read his face, or what she could see of it in the dark. He was nothing but shadow and lines, any emotion was hidden to her. What was he feeling? What was he holding back? "A dozen cupcakes is simply not payment enough for what you did."
"It started out as a favor for Milo." His voice changed, grew thicker, lower as emotion crept in. Just a touch, just a hint. "Then it became all for you."
"For me?"
"I've never felt this way before, not for anyone." He moved in, shadow and dream, so substantial he left her trembling. He stripped off his gloves and laid his warm hand against the curve of her face.
In the dark he was hidden, his eyes fathomless pools, his face a thousand shades and shadows, but when his lips met hers, his kiss was as warm as a summer breeze, as sweet as springtime, as true as his heart. An eternity was in that kiss. Time stood still, lost all meaning, that's how sweet it was. Her toes curled, her heart forgot to beat. Tears filled her eyes.
The warm brush of his lips to hers tasted of tenderness, felt like heaven. Off balance, off center, overwhelmed, never wanting this moment to end, she rested both hands on his chest, felt the crust of ice and snow on his coat and the faint, thud thud of his heartbeat beneath. Slow, steady. Sure.
That's how she felt, too. Sure of her feelings, sure of this moment. The future? It didn't matter. The parting to come? It was insignificant, overshadowed by this resplendent blaze in her heart, the same brightness she felt in his kiss. An affection that chased away the cold and the night, that made the shadows and dark insignificant. When he broke away, they were both breathless, both moved beyond words.
He rested his forehead against hers, the brim of his hat skimming the top of her head, and that moment of connection felt ever more tender. An unbreakable bond.
"I missed you." His confession rumbled low, raw with emotion. "I didn't want to. I tried not to."
"I know." She wrapped her arms around him, let him wrap her in his strong arms. "I tried not to too."
"I don't fail at much. I keep at it until I succeed." He spoke into her hair, his breath warm, holding her against him. "Not when it comes to you."
"I know the feeling." Wild horses couldn't stop what she felt. Not an avalanche, or an earthquake or the worst disaster in the history of the world. Her heart, sure of itself, had chosen him. "Good to know I'm not alone."
"Nope, guess we're in this together." He tightened his hold on her, as if he never wanted to let go, as if savoring the closeness. The pure gentleness, the intake of his breath, the rise of his heart. "Did you like the bracelet?"
"Loved it." She felt his arms relax and she leaned back to search his face. "Thank you."
"My pleasure." The shadows hid his face again as he stepped away, reluctantly releasing his hold on her. "I saw it in the window when I was heading toward a diner. Seemed like something you would wear, dainty and delicate."
"You were thinking of me." She said the words as if that was what mattered to her, the meaning behind the gift.
And not the substantial sum he'd plunked down for it.
"No, I was thinking of my horses, but they don't wear jewelry much." Joking was easier than opening up and admitting the woman had enchanted him. Captured him heart and soul. "Winchester would just snort in derision, and Scout doesn't go for diamonds."
"Funny." She gleamed up at him, more precious than any gem. Brushed with shadows, not even the dark could hide her beauty. The thick fall of her hair, the adorable curve of her cheek, the upturn of her exquisite lips.
He had no idea why a creature as captivating and amazing as her would want anything to do with him, but he wasn't going to argue. He'd just be grateful for it.
"Are you hungry?" she asked, focusing her concern on him. "Would you like me to fix you anything? A sandwich, maybe? We had some excellent roast beef for supper."
"I grabbed a bite in Deer Springs, ate in the saddle."
"Then maybe you want to warm up and thaw out. You're chilly." She patted his coat for proof and little slivers of icy snow sifted to the floor. "How long has it been since you've spent time in front of a fire?"
"The hotel in the town where I cau
ght up with Klemp." That seemed a lifetime ago now. Being here was what mattered, being with her. His chest ached with gladness, an emotion he didn't know a lot about. "When I got to the bunkhouse, didn't want to light the stove. Everyone was sleeping, and I'd have used up the wood box to warm up. I couldn't have refilled it without carrying in more and likely waking them up."
"Bringing in wood is a noisy business, that's why we try to make Magnolia do it." She snagged hold of his wrist, her touch like first dawn, that smile of light breaking through the night. "Come, let's get you thawed out so you can sleep."
"Let's face it, I shouldn’t be here, alone with you at night. You're wearing your nightgown." He held his ground, planting his feet, so she couldn't drag him anywhere. "I should go. You have your reputation to protect."
"I don't care about my reputation. It would make Iris faint if she heard me say that, but honestly, the sheriff and his men found me mostly naked in a mountain cabin tied to a bed. My reputation is a little iffy as it is." Her words came lightly, as she gave his arm another determined tug. "I'm not asking you to stay for the sole purpose of defrosting. Sure, I don't want you cold, but there's another reason."
"Is that so?" His throat closed up with an unfamiliar burning lump, emotion that rose up uncontrolled, more powerful than he was. He could not hold it down. Her words had touched him deep. She wanted him to stay. He never had an offer like that. He'd never been wanted before.
Affected, he cleared his throat, wrestling to keep the truth of his feelings out of his voice. Not sure he succeeded. "Guess I'd better hang out with you for a bit, then. I make it a rule never to disappoint a lady."
"That is an excellent rule to have." She tossed him an endearing smile, which grew wider when he gave in and trooped along with her. "I like a man who does what I want."
"Now, I never said I'd do what you want." He could joke too.
"Too bad, that's what I heard, so you're doing it." With a quiet little laugh, she led him into the library and closed the door behind them.
A faint glow from a cloud-shrouded moon gilded the uncovered window, drew the room in shades of silver, smoke and shadow. She waltzed into the center of that glow, pearled by the light. It trailed her across the room. She was like a fairytale princess, too amazing to be real, her long cascading locks tumbling down her back as she went, her white robe whirling around her ankles. He was helpless but to follow her, drawn by the heart, bound by the soul.
"Here, let me do that." He took the iron fireplace poker from her. As if he was going to let a woman do the work. No, for now, this moment Verbena was his woman. He'd move mountains for her, hold back the moon, make time stand still if she asked. He'd give his life and more for her. That was certain. He was definitely going to handle the fire for her. "I'll make myself useful while I'm here."
"When will you be leaving?" As if she knew his thoughts, as if she were thinking of it too, her words came quietly. Her question held a small, emotional wobble.
That tore at him. Made his heart break, so full of affection for her. He did not belong in her world. They both knew it. But for tonight, it didn't matter.
"Not tomorrow. I want to stick around and talk to the marshals before they take Craddock." He knelt before the hearth and stirred the embers. They came to life, glowing orange-red. He reached for the kindling bucket and sorted through it, choosing the smallest, thinnest pieces. "I want to make sure they know who they are dealing with. They need to take him seriously, not see a non-threatening city boy playing on their pity. But I put off another job to come here, so I need to get to it. Starting the day after."
"You're leaving that soon." She eased down beside him, a whisper of movement, a light brush against his arm. As the fire leaped to life in the hearth, it cast orange shadows over her, showing what the dark had kept hidden from him. The transparent emotion radiant on her face, in her eyes. Rapt, she gazed up at him, soft with a gentle brand of tenderness he'd never thought he'd see in a woman looking at him.
Caring welled up, so sheer and brilliant it blinded him. Made the world fade, the room, his troubles, leaving only her at its center, where she would always be.
Overwhelmed by the endless, expanding affection, he tried to get control of his feelings. Fished for the smallest pieces in the wood box and tossed them on the rapidly burning kindling. His hand shook, betraying him. There was no way to control this or halt this, the knowledge that she was his destiny and the woman he could not have. The opulence of the room seemed to fade back into his awareness. The expensive furniture, the imported rugs, the thousand or so books tucked on hand-crafted shelves. This home was like a castle, and Verbena the princess.
Fairytales did not end well for the men who weren't princes. He dusted the bits of bark off his hands and shrugged out of his duster. Meager heat began to build as the fire grew, but he couldn’t feel it. All he could focus on was the rarity of this moment. Of the privilege of being right here.
With her.
He sat on the carpet, scooting a few feet to lean against one of the sofas, and broke the silence. "Tomorrow afternoon, after Craddock is squared away, I plan to come visit you. Would that be all right?"
"I think it's best." With a small smile, she scooted over to join him. Sidled right up to him, so small and dainty, so dear. "How else am I going to be able to keep my cupcake promise?"
"Right, the cupcakes." He draped one arm around her, tucking her against his side. Amazing how right she felt there, like she belonged there. "I'm not a man who lets an unpaid debt go. When I do a job, I expect payment."
"Then I'll get right on those cupcakes." She snuggled into him, soft and feminine. "I suppose the quality of the cupcake matters too."
"Absolutely." His throat tightened again, so full. Emotions he couldn’t say and didn't know how to lumped there. Aching, just aching. "Quality is everything, I always say."
"Yes, I wouldn’t want to pay you with shoddy cupcakes." That small smile grew as she looked up at him, her gaze brimming with caring. Caring for him. "Only the best."
"Right," he agreed, clearing his throat. "I don't want any that are half-baked."
"Or maybe lopsided or burned around the edges."
"Or unevenly frosted." He cradled her chin in his hand, pulled her into him, just gazed into her eyes, into her, spellbound by the affection there, shining for him. It meant so much.
When her hand pressed against his jaw, it deepened the moment. Her skin was silk, her touch warm and tender. She said nothing more. No words seemed necessary. Their gazes met, held, merged.
He was falling into her, lost in her, the sharp, agonizing sweetness of love changed him. Made him forget who he was and what he was. This time, she initiated the kiss, rising up to match her lips to his. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her with all the tenderness he had. Pure reverence. Utter devotion. So she would know all that he didn't have the words to say.
Or the right.
With a sigh, she ended the kiss, slid against his chest and let him hold her. The fire spit and crackled, casting light and heat over them. The orangish light and the warm glow encircled them, shut out the rest of the world and the night. Truly content, maybe for the first time in his life, he held her tight, arms locked around her, cradling her against his chest. His love. He would give anything so this night, this moment, would never end.
* * *
Verbena awoke to dawn's first light creeping around the window drapes. For an instant, she was in bed with Rose, contented and well-rested. It took a second for the sleepy fog to lift from her brain. Not in her bed, she realized, but in the library.
The room was still and cold. The fire had gone out. Zane was gone. She didn't have to get off the sofa to know that. Funny, she didn't remember him leaving last night. She frowned, searching through her mind but the last memory she had was drowsing, snuggled against him. She must have fallen asleep and he'd laid her here, covered her up, put a throw pillow beneath her head. That gave her a cozy feeling, and she smiled into the pil
e of soft afghans covering her.
She really ought to get up and hurry upstairs before anyone found her, but she couldn’t move. Chalk it up to being too contented. She just couldn’t stop smiling. Last night had been remarkable. No need for words, just being together, reunited after being apart. Seeing the ardent affection gloss the gray depths of his eyes was enough. And although he'd left, she still felt close to him, a part of her. Forever in her heart.
Don't worry about the future, she told herself. All that mattered was right now, today. She vowed to make the most of it.
Which meant she really needed to get off the sofa. So she threw off the afghans, sat up and swung her feet to the floor. She was still wearing her knitted booties and her housecoat buttoned over her nightgown, which had helped keep her warm while she slept, but now chilly air from the floor wrapped around her ankles and she shivered. There was no trace that Zane had ever been here. The library door was closed, the fire banked.
She felt touched by his caring. Never felt that from a man before, not like this. She sighed, remembering being in his arms. He really was her dream man.
Chapter Nineteen
"These loaves are beautiful." Gemma Gunderson leaned across the mercantile's front counter and peered into the basket of fresh baked bread. "Oh, and they smell totally delicious. Yum. Our customers are going to snap them up."
"Excellent," Daisy said, giving the basket a little shove in Gemma's direction. "I think this is going to be a wonderful enterprise."
"Me, too." Gemma smiled friendly, as several more of the McPhee sisters chimed in.
But Verbena's mind was drifting right along with her eyes to the mercantile's front window. Apparently she was hoping to catch a glimpse of Zane. She thought of the bracelet tucked beneath her sleeve, with the gold and diamond heart and felt cozy inside, the way she had when they'd been snuggling last night. Contented, she gave a little sigh.
