by Jayne Blue
In the time and distance between us, I’d convinced myself that all of this was a fantasy. I had remembered Dex as something more than he really was. Now, he’d coaxed my body into remembering this really was as fantastic as I thought it was. My body was built for Dex’s. He could make me a slave to it if I let him. And oh, I wanted to let him.
As Dex thrust into me through the last gasps of his orgasm, my legs fell to the side and I nuzzled his neck. Finally, he slid out of me, leaving me coated with his seed and content for the first time in longer than I could remember. He folded himself around me, drawing me back against his chest, my ass tucked against his still throbbing member.
Our bodies had found their reckoning together. I knew we had a million things we would need to face once the blush of desire began to recede. For now though, I just wanted Dex—my Dex—to hold me and never let me go.
Chapter Eleven
Dex
I held Ava tight against me. I was afraid if I let go of her, she might float away and I’d know the whole thing was a dream. I’d wake up staring at the rusted springs of a top bunk and the clang against my cell bars as the morning watchman woke me for the chow line.
But Ava was real. I ran my hands down her rib cage, over the slope of her hip and then her ass. She was drowsy in my arms. Not quite asleep but a little drunk in the afterglow of her orgasm. God. She’d given herself to me with the same abandon I remembered. I trained her body for mine all those years ago and it seemed we hadn’t lost a step.
I pressed her shoulder and she rolled to her back. Again, not asleep but not fully awake either, her full lips curved into a smile and she moaned. My balls stiffened again at the sound of it. I wanted to get to know every inch of her again. I leaned down and kissed her. She nuzzled against me. I meant to have those luscious lips of hers good and swollen before I let her out of this room again. I was off to a pretty good start already.
I leaned up on one arm and looked at her. She was still the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. Her body was just like I remembered but with new curves that I instantly loved. Her breasts were fuller; I liked the weight of them in my hand. Ava threw her arm over one eye but leveled the other bright blue one straight at me. Her dark lashes fluttered.
“Be still,” I warned her when she squirmed beneath my touch. I still knew where she was ticklish and again, I felt the build of my pulsing desire. I was going to have to fuck her again and soon but I wanted to cherish these drowsy moments with her first.
I ran a finger between her breasts, across the slight rise of her stomach. When I reached her belly button and kept going south, she let out a sigh and her legs fell open. Oh yeah. Ava was still mine.
“I like this,” I said as I grabbed her by the hips and tilted her toward me.
“You like what?” she said, raising a blonde brow at me.
“I like having something to hold on to when you’re under me.”
She wrinkled her nose and tried to squirm away but I held her still. She lifted herself up, resting on her elbows, putting her perfect tits just a few inches from my face. I loved how they swung when she moved. I couldn’t wait to watch when I pulled her on my lap and ordered her to ride me.
She touched my face then ran her hand down my chest. Her light touch gave me goosebumps. She was doing the same thing to me as I was to her. Getting to know the changes our years apart had brought to my body. Her brow furrowed when she found an old scar cutting across my hip. It happened in the early days at Marion when I still had to fight every other second to carve out some peace for myself.
“You should see the other guy,” I said. Her face went dark, then she leaned up and kissed me there.
I cupped her jaw with my hand. Her face had changed too. It was subtle things. Tiny webbed lines in the corner of her eyes, the girlish plumpness she’d had in her cheeks had thinned into the face of a real woman with wisdom in her gaze.
There was something else too. I almost didn’t see it. But on her right hip she had a small black silhouette of an eagle. With the shadows in the room, I hadn’t noticed it before. I inched my way down until I brought her hip to my eye level. Ava squirmed again but I held her where I wanted her.
“Is that ink?” As I got close to it, I realized it wasn’t an eagle at all. It was a Caduceus symbol. A winged figure around a scepter, with coiled snakes. I recognized it as a medical symbol. Beneath it, barely visible, was the date 2006. “When the hell did you get that?”
It seemed so unlike Ava. She had been as straight-laced as they came.
“Do you hate it?” she asked.
“What? No. I think it’s sexy as hell. What else have you been hiding from me?” I laughed when I said it and flipped her over as she squealed with laughter. I held her down as she flailed her legs in mock protest. My cock was straight up, throbbing now as she thrashed beneath me, her round ass thrusting up. Fuck. I wanted to tie her to the bedposts and take more time exploring every new inch of her. And I knew she would let me. She’d be dripping wet for me before I even got one ankle lashed.
But something stopped me. Ava stilled beneath me as if she knew exactly where my eyes rested. In the small of her back, just to the right, her flesh was marred by a series of small, jagged scars. I held her still with a hand at the center of her back while I ran my other hand over her puckered flesh.
“What happened?” My voice came out more ragged than I meant. I let her go immediately when she shifted her weight and turned over. She drew her legs up, hugging her knees, resting her chin on them. She wouldn’t meet my eyes at first and that tore at my heart even more than whatever the source of her scars were.
“I hadn’t wanted to get into this today,” she said.
“Ava,” I said, running a hand down her shoulder. “You have a right to your secrets. But I want to get to know you again. No matter what happens next.”
In that moment, I realized maybe I hadn’t want to get into this yet either. In a way, we were kind of suspended in a little bubble in this room. We hadn’t talked about what any of this meant, what the future held. We had so far just enjoyed being with each other in a physical way. It might have been all she was ready for and for the moment that had to be enough.
But my Ava was brave. I’d known that from the minute I met her and something had happened to her in the intervening years that turned my brave girl into steel. It made my heart swell with pride at the same time it was a knife twisting in my gut.
“When I got done with nursing school …” she started. With a casual hand, she tucked her hair behind her ear, then rested her chin on her knees again. “… I wanted something more. I couldn’t stand being here in Green Bluff anymore. My parents had moved on to Florida. It didn’t feel like I had enough keeping me here. I was kind of rudderless. A recruiter came to the hospital. A few of my classmates had already done it. It seemed so right, so I joined the army.”
Her last sentence hung in the air for a moment. Like neither of us were willing to let it sink down to earth.
“My unit was deployed to Iraq,” she said and the knife twisted in my gut even more. For an instant, it was like I couldn’t draw air in my lungs. My Ava. My beautiful girl. She’d gone to that hell hole when I couldn’t be there for her. In that instant, I felt a range of emotions as if she were telling me about it as it happened. Fear, despair, rage, relief. I had a million questions. I wanted to draw her into my arms. I stayed stock still, afraid that if I so much as moved, she’d clam up.
“I did two tours there,” she said. “’05 to ’06. We were part of the surge. I was stationed at a Combat Support Hospital in Baghdad in the Green Zone. I came home for a while and when the chance came to go back, I did. 2009 until the beginning of 2010. Ten years in the service and then I came home to Green Bluff. Took the job at Green Bluff General. I was surgical nurse for a while but I feel the most at home in the E.R. It’s where I can do the most good.”
She kept staring at that point on the wall, hugging her kn
ees. She rocked back and forth.
“Toward the end of my first tour, I was part of a Medevac unit. We would go out and evac injured soldiers from the field. My transport hit an I.E.D. There were eight of us. Two came back. I was the lucky one. I just took some shrapnel.” She pointed to the web of scars at her hip. “The medic that made it out with me lost his leg.”
“Ava—” I made a move to go to her but she stopped me with a hand up. Whatever demons she fought, she wasn’t ready to let me comfort her. Why would she? She’d had to get used to doing it without me for so long.
Something bubbled inside me. I wanted to punch something. Wanted to fight whatever ghosts haunted her, made her face go numb like that. She stared at some point over my shoulder and it gutted me to see the deadness in her eyes. Whatever happened, whatever she’d seen, she struggled to put it behind her. God. I never wanted to be the source of her pain again. No matter what happened between us after this, I was damn sure I would never let her be in that kind of danger again.
Then it was as if she flipped a switch in her mind. Her smile came back and the light turned on in her eyes. She looked at me, leaned across the bed and kissed me.
“I don’t want to focus on our sad stories, Dex,” she said. “We’ve both lived through enough of them to last a lifetime.”
My hands came up and I folded her against me. I kissed the top of her head. “I’m sorry, baby,” I said. It was as close as I knew she’d let me get to bringing up more of the past.
“What about Tora?” she asked, deftly changing the subject. “I kept in touch with her for a while. I wrote her letters when I was overseas. She wrote back, sent me pictures. She was the sweetest little kid, Dex. Charlie helped her put together care packages for me a few times. I’ll never forget that. She must have been over the moon to have you back.”
I smiled. “She’s not a little girl anymore; she’s twenty-three.”
Ava let out a sigh and covered her eyes with her hand. “That makes me feel so old.”
“How do you think it makes me feel?”
“Forty isn’t old, Dex. But she’s good?”
I nodded. “She’s off living her own life. I’ll go out and visit her again soon.”
Ava nodded. I still had a million questions for her. I knew her parents had died. I wanted to know where she lived now. But Ava had different needs and so did I. She swung herself around until she sat in my lap, straddling me. I held her steady as she pressed herself against me. I was rock hard again, had been that way for a while. My cock pressed against her hot sex. I didn’t know how I’d done it. How had I managed to breathe for so long without feeling her like this?
Ava shifted and I angled my hips. When she settled back down, she sheathed herself over my throbbing cock. She was warm and wet and all for me. I never wanted to be anywhere but inside her again.
Then Ava started to fuck me. I held her steady at the hips so she wouldn’t lose her balance but it was all Ava as she started to ride me hard, bobbing up and down on my erection. I leaned back, resting against the footboard. I looped my hands behind my head. She wanted this and so did I. I wanted to watch her fuck me, watch how her tits swayed with her movements.
When she gasped, I felt a fresh gush of her juices trickle down, coating my balls. Her breath hitched and she threw her head back. Every man should have the pleasure of seeing something as beautiful as Ava as she did her slow grind. But this show was all for me and I knew how damn lucky I was to get it.
She pressed a hand against my chest. If she thought I was going to move an inch and miss the rest of this show, she was nuts. There was nothing—absolutely nothing—as sexy as watching her sway her hips and seek the pressure she needed. She was slick and hot, her body coursing with desire. It took every ounce of self-control I had not to grab her, flip her and fuck her senseless.
Then I got to watch her come. She tore a hand through her hair and pinched her own nipple. “Fuck,” I whispered. She was going to be the death of me. Then she threw her head back and settled her weight on her palms. With her eyes wide open and a lustful smile on her face, my Ava found her orgasm. She screamed my name and threw her head back. She gushed around me and I felt her pussy spasm and clench, as she thrust her pelvis forward.
“That’s it, baby,” I said. “Fuck me. Don’t you ever stop.”
I sat up and got my arms around her back just as she started to go slack. She was spent but I wasn’t.
“You can sleep after, baby,” I said. “I’m not finished with you yet.”
She let out a sultry laugh. My girl knew just what I needed. Exhausted as she was, she crawled to the center of the bed. Lowering her chin to rest on her hands, she thrust her ass high in the air.
“Just like that,” I said. “Don’t move.”
She wouldn’t dare. I gripped her hips and angled her even further back. Then I plunged my cock into her gaping pussy as deep as it would go. We’d been so long apart, it was going to take some time to build up the stamina I’d need to go all night. But you can be damn sure that was next on my list.
Ava screamed my name as I poured myself into her for the second time. If I had my way, there would be a third, fourth, fifth, maybe a sixth before I let her fall asleep again. And I’d become a man used to getting my way again. When I folded her against me, I saw mixed emotions cross her face. She was happy, sated. But there were shadows in her eyes. She was cautious; she guarded her heart even though she was willing to give me her body. I knew she meant to protect herself by thinking of this as maybe just a one-night stand.
It was fine for now. I would give her time. I had abandoned her, after all, even though it had not been my choice. And she’d suffered in ways I had never dreamed. For that, I would never forgive myself. A new anger bubbled within me toward the men I’d charged with protecting her. Sly never should have let her enlist, much less stand by when they sent her to war. I fulfilled my duties to the club; I wanted to know why he hadn’t kept her safe.
Ava fell asleep in my arms. A line of worry furrowed her brow and I knew her doubts about me were what put it there. That and perhaps the memory of old wounds I’d made her call to the surface. She may have had doubts but I didn’t. Ava was mine. I would give her space, but she belonged with me.
Chapter Twelve
It was well past lunchtime before I finally let Ava sleep. She didn’t have to work tonight and I was glad of that. I wanted her to stay here at the Den as long as I could keep her. I had selfish reasons for that, of course, but with Franco’s attack, I wanted her close by, just in case. I didn’t think she’d worked out my second motive yet, but worried how she’d react when she did. Our first night back together, and there was already club bullshit brewing. I’d made her so many promises the first time around that I never kept. This time, I was going to get it right.
While Ava slept, tangled in the bedsheets, I took a quick shower, threw on a fresh pair of jeans and t-shirt and headed down to the bar. The rest of the guys were already assembled in the private kitchen. Mo was back and had made enough French toast to feed a football team. My heart skipped at the thought of what Ava had been through and it was on my mind to have words with Sly about it. I was a little angry. Well, more than a little.
He was busy stuffing his face at the end of the table. He waved his fork at me and shot me a wink as I grabbed the pot of coffee and poured myself a cup.
“You do my heart good,” Mo said. I leaned sideways to let her kiss me on the cheek. “I plan on fattening you up good and proper before too long.” She patted my arm. Mo was just a little thing at four foot ten. She had the face of Ireland with creamy white skin and a shock of thick red hair piled high on her head. Anyone who underestimated her size for weakness did so at their peril.
“Get a good night sleep, did ya?” This from Colt. Sly shot him a menacing look and he slinked off his stool. Sly was right to do it. The last thing I wanted was a ribbing from the guys. This was Ava we were talking about, not some ba
r chick I’d hooked up with on the fly. If I had my way, those days were long gone. I’d make damn sure I did get my way.
“Why don’t you head over to the gym?” Sly said to Billy and the others. “I’ll fill Dex in on what we know.”
I took a sip of my steaming coffee and slid onto the stool Billy had just vacated.
“The kid still doing all right?” I asked.
Sly nodded. “They took out his spleen and transfused him a half a dozen times but he’s stable. His sister came in from Philly and he’s in good hands. Even so, I’ve got Tiny and a couple of the prospects hanging around the hospital to keep an eye on him.”
I nodded. “You want to tell me your theory on what the hell happened?” There was an edge to my voice. I had half a thought I should tread a little lighter. I didn’t want to tell Sly his business, but between Pagano’s little phone call and Ava’s revelation, I wasn’t in a great mood about any of it.
Sly raised a brow at me. “You want to tell me yours?”
The room conveniently cleared out when he said it. Billy had been given his marching orders. Mo and Charlie left the kitchen arm and arm. Everyone else found a reason to file out into the bar as well.
“You know what I think,” I said. “You said yourself Pagano’s decided to make his move now that he doesn’t have me to play with. Have you reached out to him?”
“Indirectly,” Sly sipped his coffee. “His man here is a guy by the name of Ed Londo. Billy and I are meeting with him later this afternoon. Of course, he’s denying up and down his crew had anything to do with what happened to Franco.”
