by Jayne Blue
He choked the last word out so I could barely hear it. But I saw his eyes. He meant what he said. The people I loved would have no peace while he continued to draw breath. There was no other choice. There had never been any other choice. I might be damned for it, but I would not let this man hurt anyone I loved ever again.
“Yeah?” I said, reaching into the front of my pants and pulling out the small knife I’d hidden there. “Let’s find out.”
George Pagano’s eyes widened as I stuck the knife between his third and fourth ribs, piercing his kidney. He opened his mouth, but was dead before he could scream.
I turned. Sly had a hand on Londo as Pagano sunk the ground.
“You fucking did it,” Londo said, his voice pitched an octave too high. “I can’t believe you fucking did it. Holy shit.”
Sly stood poised to take Londo out if he so much as moved. The trick now would be to hope everyone outside was ready to move quickly.
“No, no!” Londo said, putting his hands up in surrender. “You don’t understand. He wasn’t kidding about what he said. He tried to leave orders to have your daughter and some other woman killed if anything happened to him. But it’s not going to happen. I swear to you. It’s over. There’s a gun. Taped under that shelf by the catwalk. We were going to use it on him. George wasn’t going to live today no matter what.”
“Who’s we?” Sly said.
“You have to get the hell out of here.”
“Londo, what the hell is going on?”
“George wasn’t lying, Sly. He’s been obsessed with Dex. Paranoid you were going to rat him out. Mad with the idea of going after your family, Dex. None of the rest of us ever wanted that. It’s ridiculous. It’s all he could think about. The hits on the club, those were all him, but we made sure nobody got seriously hurt. Or they weren’t supposed to. At the Wolf Den, that was a mistake. My guy was aiming for the wall, I swear. I can make this okay. We don’t want a war with the club. We want to move out of this territory for good. There’s too much heat down here and it was because of George’s obsessions. He was stuck in the past. Just like you said. I can make this okay but you need to get your people and get out of here now.”
I shot a look to Sly. This could be a setup, of course. Londo could just be scared he was the next one about to wind up dead on the floor. Before I could do it, Sly walked over to the wall where Londo pointed and sure enough, concealed behind black electrical tape was a 9 .mm. Sly slid it under his belt and nodded to me.
“How do I know you’re not just lying to save your own ass?” I said, my fingers still twitching with blood rage. “How do I know my family really isn’t in danger?”
Londo put his hands up. “Because George is dead and no one has made a move on you. You don’t hear me screaming orders for my guys to start shooting up yours. Walk out with me. You’ll see.”
“You walk out first,” Sly said to Londo. The guy swallowed hard and nodded. My heart racing, I brought up the rear and we walked into the blazing sun together. We filed out. Colt and the rest of the crew rose to attention and moved toward their bikes with a look from Sly. Sawyer didn’t wait and started up the van.
“It’s over. George is dead,” Londo called out to his crew. They looked bewildered for a second but didn’t make any sort of move toward us. They stood down.
“How the hell are you going to make this okay?” Sly turned to Londo. “That’s not how this works. Are you giving me your word none of this lands on my guys?”
Londo nodded and still, none of Pagano’s men made a move. “You have more dirt on my crew than I have on yours. Just like Dex says. You keep up your end by keeping your mouths shut and we’re done with each other.” Blood roared in my ears. Later, I might be able to make sense of what happened in that warehouse, but for now, every cell in my body was telling me we needed to book, and fast. I stepped around Londo and headed for my bike, keeping one eye on Sly to cover his blind spot.
I heard movement behind me but before I could turn toward it, I felt the cold barrel against my temple.
“Get on your fucking knees and don’t move,” Billy said, before I heard the unmistakable hammer click as he cocked his gun. Steady as I could, I put my hands out and sank to my knees.
“Don’t move. Don’t anybody make a fucking move!” Billy shouted. From my peripheral vision, I saw hands go up all around.
“Billy,” Sly said, his tone slow and deliberate. “What is this?”
“This isn’t how this was supposed to work, Londo. We had a deal,” Billy shouted.
“It’s okay, Billy,” Londo said. “I wasn’t kidding. George is dead. Go inside and see for yourself. It’s not on you. It doesn’t have to be on you. It’s taken care of. It’s all good.”
It was like I had two minds. There was cold fear that came from the realization that Billy meant to end me. But it sharpened my senses and puzzle pieces fell into place. Billy had a deal with Londo. Londo had assumed he’d be in on the meeting and would take out George. But there’d be a price. Me. Billy would kill me so the Pagano family got their blood price. Maybe Sly was supposed to die too. Then Billy would get the club. Londo would get Pagano’s crew.
In that moment, I knew I was only alive, however briefly, because it turned out Londo had freaked at the sight of blood. I couldn’t help it, it made me laugh. The second Pagano hit the floor, Londo had fallen apart and panicked, forgetting all about Billy.
“Shut the fuck up, Dex,” Billy said. “You belong in prison. This is on you.”
I shrugged even though my heart pounded inside my chest and I knew with certainty Billy would pull that trigger. I’d misjudged him up until now. I’d seen that cold look of hate in his eyes since the second I walked back into the club. I felt stupid now for misreading it. “Pagano said that too. I’m sorry to disappoint both of you.”
“Doesn’t matter,” Billy said. “This way works too.”
He pressed the barrel further into my temple and black spots swam before my eyes. I felt his posture shift as he braced himself for the kick back. So did I.
The shot cracked through the air and my vision clouded red with warm blood. Billy’s blood. I turned. Sly stood directly behind me, gun raised. Billy lay at my feet with the back of his head blown out.
Chapter Twenty-One
Ava
Something was wrong. I felt it in any nerve ending. For thirty-six hours, I’d become a prisoner in my own home. Mark left but Joleen stayed with me. I kicked myself for doing it but I called Dex. My calls went straight to his voice mail.
About twelve hours in, I’d finally let Curtis into the apartment. He wasted no time turning himself into our third roommate. Joleen stood at the stove frying eggs while Curtis sat at the table. I could barely stand the sight of him and I knew that wasn’t fair.
I wanted Dex out of my life. A clean break. It was the only way I could be sure I wouldn’t walk into a hail of bullets the next time he was around. And yet, there was Curtis: as a prospect, he lacked the cut yet. But that was a minor detail. Curtis was a Great Wolf all the way. He carried himself like them. He talked like them. He bled for them. He kept a respectable distance from me and called me ma’am and that made the whole thing worse. I couldn’t stay mad at him or throw him out. Except he wouldn’t tell me anything of substance.
Where was Dex? What went down? Was everyone all right? Curtis said nothing about anything. When his phone rang I couldn’t help but hover, trying to piece together who was calling and what was said. Curtis kept it close to the vest, usually stepping out into the hall to talk. He listened more than talked and his face betrayed nothing when he came back in.
“I have to go out,” I finally said. “Eventually I’m going to have to go to work, Curtis. Are you going to follow me there too?” I wasn’t really mad at him. I was worried. Out of my mind with it.
“You don’t have to work until tomorrow night,” Curtis said, unhelpfully. “Your schedule’s cleared, remember?”
“If I left right now, would you put your hands on me?” I said. I wouldn’t. Of course, I wouldn’t. But Curtis’s answer would give me more of a clue as to how much danger Dex thought I was in. By extension, it would tell me how much danger he was in.
God. That right there. It was the reason I had to get him out of my system. He was like a drug. It felt oh so good in the moment but eventually, being with Dex would destroy me. I’d made the right call. Except, how come it hurt so badly? Just thinking about him made my heart ache from the hole he’d left there. He’d left a t-shirt behind and when Joleen and Curtis weren’t looking, I’d slipped into it just to have his scent all over me again. How would I survive losing him a second time? It had been only a day.
“Aw, c’mon, Miss Olander.” Curtis shrugged. He had puppy dog eyes and if the situation were different, I might have laughed when he set them on me. “Don’t be like that. It’s not just Dex, you know? The rest of the guys wanna make sure nothing happens to you either. Just sit tight. I promise this’ll be over real quick.”
“You shouldn’t make promises like that,” I said, fixing a cold stare at him that I knew he didn’t deserve. Then I promptly felt like a shit.
Joleen set three plates of eggs and bacon out. We were doing breakfast for dinner. Curtis wolfed his down and fixed those puppy eyes on her. She reacted properly and a blush crept up her neck. Oh brother.
“I’ll eat later,” I said and Joleen wrinkled her nose at me. I left the two of them alone and went to my corner of the loft, drawing curtains shut for privacy.
I curled up on my bed and pulled my headphones from the nightstand. I pulled up an audio book on my phone and set it in its cradle. I couldn’t even tell you what it was about. Mercifully, my brain shut off and I was asleep before the next chapter.
Pounding woke me and I sat up, disoriented. The apartment was pitch black and I had no idea what time it was anymore. I cast my headphones aside and threw the curtain back. Someone pounded at the door again.
“Curtis?” I called out. He didn’t answer. I let my eyes adjust to the light. It was very late, almost midnight, according to my phone. And I appeared to be completely alone in the apartment. What the hell?
I padded over to the door and tried to look out of the keyhole. My heart tripped at what I saw. I unlocked the four deadbolts and swung the heavy metal door open.
Dex stood before me. He was covered in sweat; blood caked the side of his face and splattered over the front of his white t-shirt under his cut. The dim light of the hallway cut shadows across his face, making him look deadly along with the gore.
How many more times could I do this? How many more times could I worry whether he was going to come back at all? And when he did, he looked like this. He looked like so many other men I’d seen and nursed. They were all tragic and heroic and beautiful and I wanted to save them all. But this one ... this one was mine. I knew I was damned for it.
“Will you let me in?” he said.
I nodded and held the door wide. He walked in and strode to the center of the room before he turned around. I quietly closed the door and locked it again before turning back to face him.
“I won’t live like this,” he said. His voice was cracked and raw, filled with the emotions of whatever happened today and the courage it may have taken for him to come back here.
“Dex ...”
“Let me get this out.” He cut me off. “Ava, I need to be with you. And I’m selfish for it, I know that. I’ve brought you nothing but tragedy and hurt and almost got you killed. I’m the worst thing in the world for you. You’ve made your choices, you have your life and I’ve crashed back into it. I know I’m not being fair to you. I know all these things but, God help me, I don’t care. I don’t fucking care.”
He reached me in two strides and my breath hitched when his arms came up and he placed them gently around me. I had to crane my neck to look up at his cruel, beautiful face. My emotions swirled within me. I loved this man. Couldn’t live with this man. Was wrecked by this man. Would die without him.
“I won’t make you anymore promises except for this one. I’m not leaving you again. You belong to me, Ava. We belong to each other. I’ll do anything you ask of me except don’t tell me to go. I won’t. Never again. I’ve made my choice.”
“What do you mean?” I couldn’t breathe. A part of me wondered if any of this was real. Was I dreaming it all? But Dex McLain was real and strong and powerful and he was standing right in front of me telling me he loved me.
“Things happened tonight,” he said and his voice cracked. My Dex. I put a hand up to explore the wound near his temple. It was superficial, a grazing wound. It rent his hairline and my heart shuddered to think what might have happened if he had leaned just a fraction of an inch closer to whatever lethal force had caused it. A bullet, of course. I’d seen enough of these types of wounds and worse.
“I can’t tell you everything. Can never tell you everything. But because of it and a thousand other things I’m not worthy of you. I may be going to hell. I accept that. But what I did I did to keep you and everyone else I love safe now and forever. I can promise you that. But Ava, I’m not leaving. Do you hear me? You can call me the worst things you can think of and you’d be right about all of them. But you’re mine and I’m done being patient. I’m done trying to be a good man.”
He crushed his lips against mine and my body betrayed me as it always did. I was so well trained for him. My heart nearly beat out of my chest as his strong arms came around me, pulling me close. I sank into the kiss. He tasted of salt, sweat and tears. They were my tears and they joined the millions of others I’d cried for this man. Would keep crying for this man if he ever did stop kissing me. I was a liar and a hypocrite to think I could have ever let him stay away.
I pulled away first, and Dex’s expression nearly broke my heart again. It was filled with love and longing and some desperate torture that I knew still haunted his dreams.
“I’ll walk away from everything but you, Ava,” he said and his voice was barely more than a whisper. “And that’s the last promise I’ll make you. I’ll be sorry for the rest of my life that I didn’t make it thirteen years ago.”
It was in me to ask him what he meant. Would I make him say the words? He would turn his back on the club for me if that was my price for taking him back. I pushed past a lump in my throat and looked up at him, searching for the truth in his eyes. I found it just as I always did.
I snaked my arms around his shoulders and pulled him down to kiss me again. He whispered my name as his lips touched mine. As he lifted me into his arms and took me to bed, I knew my answer. There had only ever been one.
Dex. My Dex. Now and always, I was his.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Dex
Ava lay naked before me on the bed. The moonlight bathed her in a blue glow and her nipples rose and fell as I hovered over her. She brought her hands up over her head and spread her legs wide in invitation. My Ava. Her body belonged to me now and forever. I hadn’t even touched her but already I could see the glistening wetness as she spread her thighs. I leaned down and kissed her there, lapping at her juices as she twitched and groaned.
“Please,” she begged me. I wanted to hear her do that for the rest of my life. Beg for me. Let me possess her. Wring every drop of pleasure from her until she fell asleep sated and purring in my arms. Then I would let her sleep for a time and do it to her all over again.
I peeled off my clothes; my cock was stiff and hard and she licked her lips at the sight of it. God. She was beautiful and sexy and every inch of her was mine. She brought her k
nees up as I came to her, plunging myself deep, all the way to the root as she wrapped her strong legs around my hips.
“Say it,” I whispered at her temple. I held myself still so I could feel her squirm in anticipation like she always did.
“Dex,” she gasped and that’s not what I meant.
“Say it.” I nipped her ear.
“Yes,” she whispered. “Always. Yes. I want you. Forever. Yes. I’m yours, Dex. I swear. I ... I love you.”
Then I fucked her. We had all night for slow and gentle. Now I meant to claim her, drive myself into her over and over as she screamed my name and begged me not to stop. Because I wouldn’t. Not now. Not ever.
I knew what I was. My soul may be damned for everything I’d done and maybe more to come. But that night, and every night, it was Ava who would bring me back from hell. And I would do the same for her.
She moaned and writhed and I flipped her so she straddled me. Her blonde hair fell over her eye and she shot me a bashful smile that nearly made me spill my seed right there just to see it. Then she seated herself on my cock and started that slow rhythm I loved so much. She threw her head back. I reached up to take her breasts. These were mine too. I held my palms flat, letting her pebbled nipples brush up against my rough skin. She ran her hands through her hair and arched her back, her body no longer able to go slow. I rolled her nipples gently between my thumb and forefinger, bringing each one to a long peak. The sensation drove her even madder as she pumped and thrust on top of me.
And then my Ava found her release. I felt her sweet pussy clench as she ground out her orgasm. She gushed for me when she came and that’s what undid me right along with her. I grabbed her hips to keep her steady as I thrust up into her, filling her with my seed and hoping it might take root. Maybe not tonight, but there would be time for that now too.
