by Ford, Brenda
“I… I will wait outside the building,” I finally gasp out. “Send someone soon. Please.”
I bend forward and grab on to my knees as I try to stop my head from spinning. I need air in my lungs as well, and lots of it. If I don’t start breathing soon then I might fall in to a heap on the side walk and stay there. That way I won’t be any use to Ellie at all. The first time she really needs me, and I fuck up? No way.
“Hey, Oliver.” The soft voice behind me makes me jump. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“What’s going on, Rosie?” I beg. “Has something happened? Have you seen her?”
“No, no, it’s still the same as before. Mom is still at the door trying to communicate with Ellie. I just wanted to come and check on you. See if you needed any help. Have you called the cops yet?”
“I have.” I nod rapidly. “And I told them to send an ambulance too, because… well, we don’t know, do we?”
Shit. Before I even realize what’s happening, tears stream down my face. I’m not usually a crier, but the idea of Ellie dying has flooded me and I can’t let it go. I keep thinking of her hurting, suffering, struggling, and she’s alone. One of us should be in there with her, but we aren’t. We’ve allowed her and Seth to be by themselves.
“You are really scared, aren’t you?” Rosie rubs my arm reassuringly. “Me too, but she will be fine. It isn’t like she’s been in there for ages or anything. We can hear a few noises. At one point, I think I heard whispering as well, but it wasn’t clear enough for me to make anything specific out. But Ellie is in there, Seth too, and we will get them out. As soon as the cops get here and they break in, everything will be fine.”
“How can you be so sure?” I plead with her. “How do you know?”
“Because I have faith. Ellie is strong and resourceful. More capable than you think.” She rubs her forehead hard looking regretful before she speaks again. “You know, I feel really bad for the way that things went with me and her. I was supposed to be looking after her after she lost her mom and I fucked up. I need her to come out of that apartment so I can make things up to her. I can’t leave things as they are.”
“Does that mean you want to make up with her?” Now that is something to be hopeful about.
“Both of you, actually. I have been an asshole to both of you.” She pulls me in for a hug. “I was a complete dick to you before and I can’t apologize enough. I can’t tell you who not to date because it isn’t anything to do with me. I mean, you didn’t tell me to keep away from Tristan, even though I bet you wanted to?”
“Oh, I did,” I half chuckle, trying to get in to the conversation so I don’t worry more.
“Exactly, and you didn’t. Although…” She looks up at me through her eye lashes. “He broke up with the other girl and wants me back which is fun… but don’t panic. I will never go back there. My next boyfriend will be a nice one. Not you, of course, because you are in love with Ellie, but someone nice.”
“I… I didn’t say anything about love.” Why does everyone keep assuming that?
“You don’t need to.” She pats me on the back. “It’s written all over you. You love her and she loves you. If it wasn’t for me getting in the way, you would be happy together. So, I’m very sorry about that.”
“You didn’t… I got in the way, panicking about her age and stuff.”
“I said that she was too young for you as well. Over and over again.” Rosie purses her lips together tightly. “But I was wrong about that as well. Age doesn’t mean anything. Not when it comes to love. I stood in your way and I don’t want to do that anymore, don’t you stand in your own way.”
I glance up the building towards Ellie’s apartment. “So, are you saying that we should be together?”
“I am.” She nods. “And I’m also saying that me and you should be friends just like we were before. Or maybe in a new way, however we can make it work. I don’t want to lose you, Oliver. You have been my support through so much. I can’t not have that anymore. I need you in my life. Don’t go anywhere.”
I pull her to my chest and hug her some more. “I’m not going anywhere, Rosie. I never wanted to stop being your friend. I never wanted to do anything to upset you, I hope you know that. Causing you any pain was never what I wanted. I just wish… well, I don’t know, I wish that everything could have been different.”
“But it isn’t.” She shakes her head and smiles. “And that’s okay. It can be good just as it is.”
An unspoken agreement flows between us. I just know that we are going to be okay after this. It’s been a long time since everything has been good and now… well once we get Ellie and Seth from that house, we will be back there. Me and Rosie just as we have always been. I’m glad about that and I know Ellie will be too.
This really could turn out to be everything that I have ever wanted and more. If we can just rescue Ellie, then life will be good at last. No more worries about age, no more love triangle, just me and her and a happy ever after that I’m pretty sure could come to us if we just let it. God, I love that idea. Me and her forever, exploring that chemistry, allowing the love to flow freely between us. The drama all over. It’s perfect.
“I wish that the police would turn up already,” I say stepping back from Rosie. “This is dreadful. They seem to be taking forever, don’t they? Aren’t they supposed to get here at a certain time? In under ten minutes?”
“It has only been a few moments since you made the call. Give them a chance. They will get here.”
“I can’t.” I shake my head. “It makes me want to bolt up there to tear the door down myself. The only reason I haven’t yet is because I’m scared about putting her in an even worse situation than she’s in.”
“I know. Me too. We need to be strong for her and Seth. Get the police here as quickly as we can.”
I dart my eyes left and right, trying to work out which way they will be coming from, as Rosie takes a seat on the side walk. Her head falls in to her hands as she tries to come to terms with what’s happening, and I do the same in my own way by pacing up and down, refusing to be still. The moment my body stops moving will be the moment those horrible images of Ellie come back in to my mind and I can’t allow that.
Instead, I need to think of the good that could come our way in the future now that things are better. A real relationship, living together, loving one another forever more… we could have all of that for sure.
You are just thinking this because you know she’s going to die, my brain spitefully jumps in, ruining it for me. You are never going to be happy because everyone that you love dies.
I can’t think that way just because I lost my parents. My brothers are all still here and so are my friends. Ellie will be too. She will. She has to be. God, life really is too short to not go for what you want. I am learning this all over again. It might be a cliché but it’s the truth. I won’t ever let anything get in the way again. I’m going to start living every day as if it’s my last and focus on my own happiness. Of course, I will still people please, I don’t think I will be able to turn that side of me right off, but it won’t be all of me.
“Blue flashing lights!” Rosie jumps up suddenly. “They are here!”
Relief floods me. The officials have finally arrived which means that we can get moving. I can’t wait to get back inside that building and to save Ellie’s life. That’s the only way that I’m going to be able to get out of my head and on with things. Then I’m not going to hold back any longer. Once she’s in my arms I will finally confess all and tell her that I love her at long last.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Ellie
“What the fuck is that?” Dad yells as he finally tugs the knife away from me. He’s been taunting me for the last ten to fifteen minutes, threatening to stab me then slightly moving away again, giving me time to breathe before torturing me all over again. He’s definitely getting some kind of sick kick from it. “What’s happening?”
S
omeone is bashing on the door, I’m sure of it. The sound is so loud, it’s absolutely deafening. As I prop up on to my elbows, I can see that Seth has his hands over his ears, but I want to hear every part of it. To me, this is a good sign. This is someone else from the outside world getting in and ending this nightmare at long last. A happy tear rolls down my cheek. This time I want to scream, but it’s a sound of joy.
“Police!” Finally, the door comes off its hinges and armed police officers burst into the room. “Freeze.”
Relief floods me and I tumble to the ground, my knees hitting it hard, and I hold my hands up high in a surrendering gesture. I assume they don’t think that I’m the one causing issues, but I need to be safe. I dart my eyes backwards to see Seth slowly uncurling and following my lead which calms me down a lot. At least he isn’t catatonic. This could be really affecting him more than I could even think of.
“What the fuck?” Dad yells as one of the officers wrestles him to the ground, knocking the knife out of his hand. Another couple of pouches of the same white powder scatter across the floor. “I haven’t done anything wrong. I’ve just come here to get what’s mine. That bitch has money belonging to me.”
I don’t care what’s going on with Dad now. He can say whatever he wants about me, the cops will soon know the truth about everything once I give my statement. I don’t know what it will do, but I’m hoping that my father ends up in jail for it. He should get some time for torturing us like he has.
But right now, I need to get to Seth. My poor little tormented brother needs me, and I need him as well. We have a shared trauma now that will connect us deeply forever. Only he will understand this like I do.
“Oh my God, Seth.” I pull him in to my arms and hold him. “Are you okay? Stupid question. Of course you aren’t okay. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn’t want you to ever end up in danger.”
“Why…” He’s sobbing now. The flood gates of tears have finally opened. “Why is Dad like that?”
“I wish that I could answer that for you,” I reply sadly. “But I have no idea. Some people are just bad.”
“Like those girls were to you?” He tilts his little eyes up to look at me. “They were bad, weren’t they?”
“You… you aren’t supposed to know about that.” I feel sick to my stomach. “But yes, they were bad too.”
“You cried all the time,” he replies. The emotion thick on his tongue. “I wanted to know why, so I listened in while you were talking to Mom about them bullying you. And Dad is a bully too.”
We hold one another and both weep as the police take Dad away. A couple of officers stay behind for us to give our statement, which is when they bring in Auntie Amelia, Rosie, and Oliver too. It’s hard not to crumble in to a puddle of mess when I see them all, but I need to keep myself stitched up for a little while longer, because I need my statement to cover everything that happened, including me nearly losing my life.
I avoid everyone’s eyes as I talk, focusing solely on my words instead. I make sure they know all about everything. The drugs, the weapon, the threats, the need for Mom’s money… The officers feel bad for me, I can tell, but I don’t need sympathy now. I just need some kind of justice to help me out.
Afterwards, a paramedic checks me over as well. He would prefer me to go to the hospital, but I decline. I feel okay and I don’t want to be seen by doctors, I want to remain here where I feel safe. I simply have to promise him that I will go to the hospital if I notice anything different because it might be a sign of internal damage. But I don’t think there is going to be. Through everything I experience, all was surface stuff.
“Okay, well that is great for an initial statement,” Finally, they stand up to leave. “And the crime scene photographers have got images of everything they need to. I don’t think we need anything else from you right now, but we will be back in touch if that changes. Thank you very much, Ellie.”
As soon as they head for the door, Auntie Amelia embraces me. I can tell by the way that her shoulders are shaking that she’s weeping. She’s sad that she couldn’t help more, I can feel it. I know what she’s like. She will blame herself for a long time to come. I won’t though. This is no one’s fault but his. He did all of it.
“Thank you for saving me,” I whisper to her. “Thank you for coming here. I appreciate it. All of it.”
“Oliver brought me and Rosie here. He’s the one who saved you really. If it wasn’t for him…”
“I don’t want to think about it,” I jump in quickly. “It’s unbearable. I can’t believe that happened.”
“He’s such a scum bag. I can’t believe how low he has sunk. He has always been a bad person but that is on another level. Coming to you for money. Thinking of the money after your mother died. He’s disgusting. An absolute pig. I want to tear his head off his neck… he’s just lucky to be in jail right now.”
I open my mouth, almost about to ask her about all of the things that Dad said about Mom. The drugs stuff mostly, but then I shut my mouth rapidly. I make the decision that it doesn’t matter. It’s irrelevant. I don’t need to know every side of her. I can just be happy with knowing what I did know. I don’t want her memory tainted.
“Oh God, Ellie.” Rosie takes me from her mom, so Auntie Amelia head straight for Seth. “That was horrible. We were outside that door and I had no idea what was going on. We could sort of hear things but not much and we were so scared. We didn’t know if you were sick or whatever. It was horrible.”
“It wasn’t too great in here either,” I reply in a teasing tone. “But I’m sorry about it all.”
“Don’t you apologize! He was the one who did something wrong. That man… I have no words.”
“Thank you,” I whisper, growing all emotional all over again. “For everything.”
“Don’t thank me, thank Oliver. He’s the hero here.” Wow, she really doesn’t look mad as she says this. Was she serious about all the stuff that she said before? Is she really letting Oliver go romantically? “He really cares about you, more than you know. Which is why I told him to be with you.”
“No, I already said that I can’t,” I shoot back, trying to forget the fact that we slept together after I made this decision. “Because I can’t hurt you. You are my family and I need you. If today hasn’t shown me that…”
“I don’t like Oliver in that way.” She shakes her head to highlight her point, but I don’t know if she’s telling the whole truth or not. “I don’t think that I ever did really. I just projected feelings on to him because of me and Tristan ending and Oliver being such a nice guy… but he isn’t the one for me. You two suit much better.”
“I’m too young for him. You said it yourself, Rosie, and you’re right. I should have listened.”
“Who cares about age? No one does when it comes to love. Stop making excuses and just be happy already.”
She gives me a genuine smile which fills me with joy. She really does mean this. Rosie is finally giving me and Oliver the green light which is awesome because it means that if I want to, I can have him and my family at the same time. I have already lost too many people; I don’t want to lose anymore.
“Look at him.” Rosie spins me around and rests her hands on my shoulders. “Standing in the corner by himself, waiting for you. He’s the hero, the man that you are supposed to be with, so go get him already.”
She shoves me forwards slightly forcing me to make the decision for me, but that’s okay because I want to go anyway. I continue moving until I end up standing by his side, giving him a coy smile.
“You’re my hero,” I whisper. “You saved me. Thank you so much.”
“Why are you thanking me?” He embraces me right away. “You saved yourself by sending me that message, letting me know that you were in danger. If you hadn’t been so brave, then I might not have guessed.”
I slip my fingers through his and hold his hands. We stare at one another with our hands hanging loosely between us, just smiling. His grin is so
ft and sweet. It makes me fall for him all over again. Having Rosie completely okay with me and him makes it even more exciting to be standing with him now. I have gone from such shock and terror all the way to sheer happiness in such a short space of time. Because of him.
“You were so brave, Ellie,” he says quietly. “I can’t believe you went through all of that. I was listening to your statement. It was just harrowing. I feel so bad for you. But you seem okay.”
“Me and Seth made it out the other side, it’s fine. We’re fine. To be honest, we probably should have expected something like this to happen. That’s the sort of man my father is. So, let’s hope he gets locked up.”
“Oh, we will make sure of it!” he insists. “Don’t you worry about that. I have fallen head over heels in love with you which makes it my duty to take care of you, no matter what happens.”
“You… you love me?” I gasp out. “Are you serious?” He wiggles his eyebrows playfully. “Because I love you too. I know I do. I just can’t believe that you feel the same way. That’s so crazy and amazing.”
“Well, I do.” His hands tighten around my waist. “And I’m sorry for not saying it sooner and acting like a complete idiot instead. But if you can forgive me, then I want to spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”
“The rest of your life, huh? Wow… I love the sound of that. It’s a long time though.”
He dips his head down and gently presses his lips to mine, sealing my future with the tingling graze of his mouth. I press up on to my tip toes so I can kiss him back, deepening our connection. Finally, it’s going to be me and him forever. We’ve tried fighting it and that hasn’t exactly worked out, so now it’s time to embrace it instead. Really feel our love and to just explore one another. I have gone from the worst day of my life to the best, which just shows how much of a roller coaster love can be. Now, it’s time for me to start enjoying the ride.
