He swallowed.
And he got the message.
“Or should I call you a hardened badass who hates when men point out the obvious?” he corrected.
She laughed. It was hard not to do it.
He was smart and funny.
Yeah, she could work with that. It took balls to own something, and to do it with some sarcasm always appealed to her.
“Welcome aboard, Doctor Magnus,” she offered, shaking his hand.
“Tony,” he stated. “I’m pretty laid back. I don’t mind first names, Agent LaRue. I’m sorry if I offended you.”
Gabe relaxed. He could tell Elizabeth liked the man. He was still standing after calling her pretty. God forbid she acknowledged that she was gorgeous. Only she’d be offended by that.
“Elizabeth,” she offered, shaking his hand.
“I can’t wait to see how this works,” he stated. “I’ve been behind a desk a long time to earn all my degrees.”
“Tell me about you.”
“I have a dual doctorate degree in anthropology and forensic anthropology, and a master’s degree in entomology. I’ve worked for a few governments running dig sites for their teams, and I taught a few classes at Cornell this past year.”
His credentials were impressive.
“That’s great, but what about you?”
“I like bones and bugs.”
“And?”
“That’s about it. I’ve been doing this for ten years straight. Bugs and the dead are my life. I’ve recently started dating. Are you interested?” he asked.
Elizabeth pulled her gun and checked the chamber. “Gabe if I shoot him what happens?”
Tony laughed. “I’ll bleed. That’s a no brainer.”
She couldn’t help herself. She laughed. “You’ll fit in fine, Tony. If you get handsy, I’ll take them off at the wrists.”
He grinned. “Noted, Special Agent Aggressive.”
“About the bugs,” she began.
“Yeah?”
“I hate them.”
That was something she’d never enjoy. Creepy crawlies could kiss her ass. She ate, slept, and handled the dead. They were her jam, and when they were snacking on the dead, it made her skin crawl.
He grinned. She was going to be fun.
“What do we have?” he asked. “Want to talk case with me?”
Gabe let her handle it.
She was running this one.
Solo.
“We have three dead women. I need to see if the first is connected to the second two, so that’s going to be your job. I need them taken down to their bones.”
“I can do it.”
“The lab will have everything you need,” Gabe stated. “It’s pretty high-tech. Doctor Leonard runs a tight ship.”
“Who is that?” Tony asked. “Is it a she, and is she pretty like killer here?”
Elizabeth snorted. “She is a he, and he is the ME. He’s going to be your boss.”
“Crap. All the good babes are angry.”
Gabe pointed at him. “She really will hurt you, and then I have to do paperwork. Behave.”
He raised his hands in surrender.
“I’ve been dying to see the morgue. See what I did there?” he asked, wiggling his eyebrows.
She laughed.
“Oh, Christ! Another joker on the team. What the hell was I thinking?” Gabe asked. “You two can’t work together. You’ll cause issues.”
Elizabeth loved few things in life.
Her father, her job, Chris, and…
“How do you feel about practical jokes, jackassery, and tomfoolery, Doctor?”
He smiled. “I love a practical joke.”
Gabe sighed. “Well, shit. This is a nightmare.”
“Seriously, I’ve been dying to see this lab. I heard it’s hotter than a hooker’s…”
Elizabeth cleared her throat. Gabe was getting red. That was her cue to control the newbie before he became unemployed.
“It has everything you could ever ask for,” she offered.
“Bone beetles?” he asked.
Elizabeth stared at him. “Is there really a difference in the type?” she asked. “They eat flesh. That’s the important part, right?”
He opted to clue her in and make it a teaching moment. He loved sharing his knowledge.
“Bone beetles, or Checkered Beetles, are special. They will eat the larva of the other predatory beetles. That will stop them from destroying evidence. They move far slower than their counterparts do as they consume flesh. In forensics, that matters.”
“Uh, okay.”
“I have some right here in my bag.”
He pulled out a Ziploc baggie, and inside there were beetles, and they were dead.
“Want one?” he asked as he popped one into his mouth and began chewing.
“Did you just...?”
She was horrified. Elizabeth prayed he was a magician in his spare time and this was some trick.
There was no way.
No.
He couldn’t have.
Elizabeth knew no one was that damn crazy.
“Yes, I just ate a bug. For the record, they are a healthy snack.”
Gabe watched the interaction and it was damn funny. There were very few things in life that would freak Elizabeth out, and he couldn’t help but enjoy it.
Apparently, this was going to be fun to watch.
“Doctor Magnus, that’s freaking disgusting. They eat dead bodies!”
“Not these. I raised these at home. They were fed organic plants and a little ground beef. If you add a little packet of powdered ranch dressing mix, they are crunchy and awesome. Are you sure you don’t want to try? I can give you the recipe.”
She was horrified.
No.
That didn’t even come close.
“You’re insane. Here’s your assessment, Gabe. He’s out of his freaking mind. He just ate his pets!”
Gabe laughed. “So, basically, he’ll fit right in.”
She sputtered.
“Are you sure you don’t want one?” he asked, holding out the bag.
“Gabe.”
The boss man shook his head. “Son, put the bugs away. She’s going to kick your ass if you wave them in front of her again. When she gets that look on her face, it’s time to duck or run. Memorize it.”
He did what his boss said. “Too many people ignore the protein benefits of beetles and bugs. One day, we may be a society that has to consume them to survive.”
“I’ll eat my gun first.”
He tsked her. “I bet your protein levels are low. You’re cranky.”
“I’ll eat a burger at lunch time,” she stated. “My protein levels will be just fine.”
“Suit yourself. I also have grubs…”
“Stop.”
“But…”
“NO!”
“Why don’t you take him to the morgue, Elizabeth,” Gabe offered. She was now in charge of him, and it was going to be fun. Elizabeth had met someone who could rile her up.
It was about time.
“Yes, let’s get started,” he offered, tucking his snack away in his bag. “I’m dying to see this lab.”
Outside, he lowered his voice. “I have a question.”
“What?” she asked.
“This Doctor Leonard...do you think we’ll get along? I like laid-back people. I don’t like tyrants.”
She thought about it.
“He’s hardly a tyrant, but he likes things by the book. In fact, he loves bugs. Offer him some.”
He grinned. “Really? He does?”
“Yes,” Elizabeth offered. “He’s a big fan.”
Tony smiled. “I can’t wait.”
Oh, neither could she.
Elizabeth couldn’t wait for Christopher to meet this nutjob. She didn’t give him a week. After they had to be locked in a room together with this guy’s bugs, Chris would shit three bricks.
Doctor Tony Magnus was certifiable.<
br />
That was for damn sure.
This was going to be fun.
Chapter Two
Wednesday Mid-Morning
T he walk down to the lab was filled with chatter. Tony kept asking her a million questions, and she wasn’t sure if he was really as smart as Gabe had said, or if the man was a prank.
Was Gabriel Rothschild screwing with her?
Genius?
Really?
There was no freaking way. He was more like a child trapped in an adult body.
“So, Doctor, really…why the FBI?”
“I want to help people who are lost find their way home. It’s been my mission in life for a long time,” he offered.
Well, that worked for her.
They all had to have their missions. She was still trying to figure why she dealt with the crazy all day long. Maybe it was to impress and make her father proud. It was tough being the daughter of a highly respected lawman.
“Well, I’m sure you’ll be an asset to the team,” she offered, trying to be positive. It wasn’t that she didn’t think she’d get along with him. Elizabeth already liked him. Chris was going to be the wild card. The man took his job very seriously, and Tony Magnus didn’t.
Elizabeth hoped she wasn’t going to be spending her days playing mediator between them. That would be exhausting.
“I’m sorry about the bugs in the director’s office. I’m really bad with first impressions. I’ve spent the last decade learning to do my job or digging in graves. I’m horrible with the living. I always seem to scare people away when I meet them.”
She got it. At least with her, he wouldn’t have to worry. Elizabeth didn’t judge a person on first impressions.
In fact, she was horrible with the living too.
“It’s okay, Doctor Magnus. You have nothing to worry about. We’re laid back. Well, I am. I’ll help you get adjusted to the FBI.”
“I’d appreciate that more than you’d ever know, Elizabeth, and I’d really like if you’d call me Tony. I hope we can work together and make a difference. Maybe we can actually be friends one day.”
Yeah, they could be. She already knew it. Truth be told, she tended to deal with men better than women. She simply gravitated toward them. With men, she didn’t have to play the girly game. She could just be herself.
“I’d like that.”
He relaxed. “Thank you for that, Elizabeth.”
It was the least she could do. “You’ll be fine when you go in there, Tony. Just keep one thing in mind.”
“What?” he asked.
“In that room, he’s the boss. In the field, I am. We’ll get you through it. You can always ask questions, and you can always learn. That’s how you grow as a Fed.”
He held out his hand. “Again, thank you.”
She didn’t know what was up with the man, but there was something there. Elizabeth could see a sadness in his eyes. He’d had a tough life. She was sure of it.
“Question.”
“What?” he asked.
“When you were a kid...?”
She didn’t get to finish. Tony cut her off. Apparently, that was a sore point for him.
“I grew up way too fast. I spent my youth in foster homes. I don’t remember my childhood, and I don’t like to discuss it.”
That said it all.
He was done talking about it.
“We’re going to be really great friends,” she stated, trying to offer the man something.
He stared at her. “How do you know?”
She knew a broken bird when she saw one. How? She was one.
“Let’s call it my keen investigative senses.”
And with that, she adopted him as her own. Like with Chris, she was going to make sure this man fit into their FBI world. He was a good person.
She could sense it.
Elizabeth would keep him safe too.
“Shall we?” she asked.
When they arrived at the suite, she entered a code to access the room. As the doors opened, they headed inside. Chris was already behind the metal tables, getting ready to do his thing. Techs were milling around him, gathering all the evidence that the city ME had left behind.
He was running it like he owned it. A lot had happened in the last nine months. This man had come into his own in the FBI world.
She was proud of him.
“Newton, here’s our new buddy,” she stated, bringing Tony closer to her best friend as she did the introductions.
Chris was smiling at her. “Hey, Lyzee, honey, welcome to the crazy,” he stated. “We’re wrapping up the trace, and we’ll be ready shortly.”
He focused on the man.
He was tall, dark, and smiling. Plus, he was standing a little too close to Elizabeth. Jealousy reared its ugly head deep within his gut.
“And you are?” he asked.
“I’m Doctor Anthony Magnus, but I like Tony.”
Chris plastered a smile on his face. He knew he couldn’t act like an idiot. Elizabeth wouldn’t tolerate it, and he didn’t want to make a spectacle.
“Doctor, welcome to my happy abode.”
“It’s a pleasure, Doctor. I’ve heard a lot about you. The pretty investigator here told me…”
He didn’t get to finish. She elbowed him in the gut.
“Jesus.”
Chris started laughing. It looked like he didn’t have to worry about the man poaching his Elizabeth. She had it under control.
“Rule one. She loathes being called pretty. You can’t state the obvious with her. She likes to be called bitch.”
Elizabeth laughed. “That I do.”
Tony tried to catch his breath. “What’s rule two?” he asked, rubbing his gurgling gut.
“Don’t check out her ass. If you do, run. Our Lyzee has a temper when it comes to being objectified.”
“So pretend I didn’t look?” Tony asked, finally standing upright after the shot to his gut.
“Pretty much.”
Elizabeth gave him a fist bump. “See? I told you that you’d fit right in and get it.”
Chris still stared at the man with a wariness.
“What do we have?” she asked, getting them started.
Chris knew she didn’t want to screw around anymore. “We have a winner here.”
“Great. I love when the cuckoos come out to play.”
She had no idea.
In this case, it was going to be better to show Elizabeth what they were working with than to tell her. As they approached, Chris picked up the face that had been removed from the woman that was on the table. It hung between his fingers, the gaping eyeholes drooping a little. It gave it a garish look.
That was saying a lot, considering it was someone’s face at one point.
“As you can see, we have a lunatic.”
When he showed her and the doctor, the fun began.
“Oh, God!” Tony muttered.
Elizabeth heard the tone and took a step backward. She knew what was coming. She’d heard it before with other people who were stunned by the body of a victim.
“Chris,” she warned, only it was too late.
Tony puked on him.
Elizabeth watched in horror and amusement as the bug man tossed his crispy, crunchy beetle snack all over Christopher Leonard’s aqua green scrubs.
She could see the little legs in the bile.
It was…something.
Silence fell over the entire room as Chris stared down at his scrubs while holding a face.
“Oh my God!” muttered Tony. “I am so sorry. Dead face, punch to the gut, and first day jitters don’t mix.”
Elizabeth started laughing.
“Tony, welcome to our team.”
Chris was torn.
They were accustomed to just about every bodily fluid. Only, wearing it was entirely another thing. Honestly, if he had a dollar for each time someone vomited in the autopsy room, he’d be richer than he already was, but this…
This was new
.
No one had ever actually tossed their cookies all over him. Then again, this didn’t look like cookies.
There were little legs.
That couldn’t be right, could it?
“What the hell were you eating?” Chris said, staring down at the puke puddling around his feet.
“Ranch flavored beetles,” Elizabeth offered, reaching into the man’s bag, as he stood there horrified. “Want one?” she offered.
Chris stared at her.
“Bugs? I hope you’re kidding.”
There was no way…
She had to be…
This wasn’t…
Then her snort said it all.
She couldn’t make this shit up.
“I didn’t think you’d share your beetles this way, Doctor Magnus. You get a ten for creativity,” Elizabeth stated, patting the freaked-out man on the back.
The man looked horrified.
What a way to make a first impression.
“Welcome to our team.”
* * * E l i z a b e t h L a R u e * * *
Airport
Ethan was getting ready for their flight. The FBI plane was booked solid, so he and his partner were flying a commercial airline. He hated flying with citizens.
They always saw his gun and asked stupid questions.
Was he a US Marshall?
Was he a terrorist?
Could they touch it?
It was a pain in the ass.
Well, at least they didn’t focus on the fact he was Native. There was his silver lining.
As they boarded, Ethan was glad to get to his seat. Immediately, he pulled out his laptop to work. He didn’t plan to waste a second of his flight time. If he worked, he didn’t have to tolerate the bullshit going on around him.
“You’re going to ignore me the entire time, aren’t you?” Jay asked.
Ethan glanced over. “I’m working on a few profiles for Gabe. If we were on the FBI jet, I’d be working. I don’t see what’s so different.”
“Yeah, but we have the ladies all around us. We have the opportunity to get some pussy.”
Ethan stared at his laptop. “Yeah, well, that’s more your game, Jay. That’s not what I’m about. Why do you try so hard to hook up, Jay? It’s like you’re on a mission to fornicate with as many women as possible.”
Stalked by the Past: An FBI Flashback Novel. (An FBI Romance Thriller Book 17) Page 6
