Dotty said, “I really don’t know, Dear. I tried to teach you not to do that. Not because it’s a bad word, but because we want to use it in the right way. Tell me what you think of it.”
Jett said, “Um, is that the rules? I know I have to tell the truth, but do I have to talk about it if I don’t want to?”
Courtney patted Jett’s knee and said, “Most of the time, you don’t. You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. No one can make you. You tell the truth because you want to, but you can just not answer if you don’t want to talk about it.”
Jett said, “Good. Oh, Momma, isn’t it just a word for good sex? Like wild sex that means you are really into it because, you know, I love him?”
Dotty said, “Yes. That’s exactly right.”
Jett said, “But people say, ‘I was so fucked’, but they mean, ‘I was in so much trouble’. That doesn’t make sense. Milly, didn’t you get ‘so fucked’ last night?”
Milly laughed and said, “Sweetie, I really did. And this morning too. Wow, I’m not used to talking like this. But yeah, I got so fucked that I thought my eyes were falling out. I guess you could say that all I’m fucked up now. She’s right. People are stupid. If fucking is great sex, then being fucked up is being full of great sex. At least as far as I’m concerned. What do you say to that, Dotty?”
Dotty said, “Well, if that’s the definition, then getting fucked up makes the world all make sense, not all messed up and bad. So yeah, I think Kitty is in a really good place right now and Dave must have really fucked her up.”
Milly said, “And Dan has me totally fucked up now. Haha. Hey, I’m going to go to Vegas and I’m going to marry the man I have loved for years, and change my name and live here with my husband and my sister and her husband. That’s pretty fucked up and wonderful.”
Courtney said, “That’s what I’ve been saying since Dave rescued me! That I feel all fucked up, but in the best possible way. But you can really only get fucked up if you fuck.”
Jett said, “Well, that settles it. I need to get all fucked up. It still feels weird though. Daddy, it’s OK, isn’t it?”
Dan looked concerned and said, “Of course it is. Bug, I want you to be happy and I know that Dave will make you happy. You have my blessing.”
Jett said, “Even to…you know? Fuck?”
Dan said, “Of course.”
Jett said, “You won’t be mad?”
Dan saw the puzzled look in my eyes and said, “Jett, little Bug, tell Dave why you are asking me that. Exactly why. Be honest. Tell him all the details of why you are afraid that I might be mad if you have sex with Dave. Tell the absolute truth. You won’t be in trouble. Bring it all out in the open. It will feel good.”
Jett said, “Well, I just mean because you’re my Daddy and you protect me and I just have to know if you think he’s the one you want for me. I want him so much, so I don’t want you to be mad that I picked him and because it’s weird because of Courtney, and I just want you to say it’s OK if I have sex now. I know you didn’t want me to have sex with the wrong guys, and Daddy I didn’t, but I want you to know that now I will, with Dave, because he is the right one.”
I sighed in relief, and Dan smiled at me.
Jett noticed and looked at me and then at her dad and laughed and said, “Oh! Did you think that…oh hell no! Never. Dad has been the most wonderful and respectful and un-weird that a dad can be. Yeah, me and Kitty flirted with him, but until yesterday, I’d never seen him naked or anything. Geez! But you know what? Now that we’re adults and it’s just nudity, that isn’t weird at all. Hell, I saw you naked, Dave. And Kitty and Momma and Milly, too. But no, Daddy has always been very respectful and appropriate. Geez! I’m glad we could clear that up!”
Then, more subdued, she said, “Kitty, what if I can’t help it?”
Courtney said, “Can’t help what?”
Jett said, “What if I can’t help lying. If I forget what the truth is because my brain is stupid? What if I um, have to lie? Because I’m not ready to, I don’t know, if I forget? I’ve been doing it for a long time.”
Courtney said, “You know, I’ve never sat on Dave’s lap yet. It looks like it would be really nice. But yeah, if you have to lie, because you forget, if it’s a story you are telling because we tell stories, we’ll be OK with that, and I won’t make you sleep on the sofa. But if you try to make me believe something that you know isn’t true, that won’t be cool at all. If you say you have this PDD thing, well, I guess that could be true and it doesn’t matter. But if you say that you hate Dave’s penis, that’s just a lie and that would be bad. If you say you are going to kill him in his sleep, and I wish you would stop that, well, that’s a story and we won’t worry about it. But if you say you’d rather have your eyes gouged out than to take your clothes off and sunbathe with us when you clearly want to get naked and have Dave admire your pretty butt so bad that you can’t stand it, then you sleep on the couch.”
Jett said, “It seems subtle. Maybe just telling the truth all the time will be easier in the long run. I’ll try. I think I get it. I have to be honest about how I feel and what I want, but maybe a bit of fantasy is still OK.”
I said, “A bit of fantasy is absolutely OK. Courtney took me out in the off-road car this morning and it has me thinking that I need to form an expedition into the desert to look for dinosaurs. I’ll probably take a pretty assistant with me, but if we’re lucky, we might discover a lost um, cavegirl out there and who knows what will happen then.”
Courtney said, “I get to be the assistant. But Dave, it’s more likely that you will find a tribal maiden than a cavegirl. That would be OK, wouldn’t it?’
I said, “Hmm, you mean a friendly native in a suede skirt with fringe all the way around? I guess we won’t know till we get out there and explore for a while.”
Dan grinned and said, “Um, Son, I like the way you think. Adventure and mystery. Hey, I’ve heard of this island out in the river where there’s this village made up of nothing but lonely water nymphs. A couple of young ones and their mothers. The island is sinking, but maybe you and I can go see if we can rescue them. I think that they would be very grateful and might reward us in any way we wanted.”
I said, “I’d be happy to rescue some water nymphs. We’d have to, wouldn’t we? It would be our duty. But Dad, wouldn’t the nymphs be naked? They won’t have anything to reward us with. I guess it won’t matter. I’d rescue them no matter what.”
Dan said, “Son, from what I hear, they may be naked, but there’s a legend about something called the rainbow of, well, we don’t know what it means, but it’s called the Rainbow of Pussies and they say that the nymphs might show it to you if they take a liking to you.”
I said, “Hmm. It sounds like something to eat. Like Rainbow Pussy Fruit. You said that we don’t really know, but that would make sense to me. I mean, if any of that really exists at all.”
Jett said cheerfully, “I’m getting mine done.”
Milly said, “Getting your what done?”
Jet said, “Kitty has her pubic hair dyed bright blue. I’m getting mine done too, but I l don’t know what color. Mom’s is silver now, but I think she’ll do it too. It’s kind of a house rule, so you better plan on it. Silver isn’t a rainbow color. I think you’d look good in orange. Um, that’s OK, right Courtney? Saying it’s a house rule and stuff? That’s what we’re saying, isn't it? We’re saying that kind of thing isn’t really lying? Unless we try to make someone believe it?”
Courtney said, “Yeah, that’s perfect. Yeah Milly, sorry, but house rules say you have to dye your pubic hair, assuming you have any. I didn’t get a good look. We have to dye it so that we can tell each other apart when we sunbathe.”
Milly said, “And what if I don’t have any pubic hair? What then?”
Courtney grinned and said, “No problem. We just paint some on. It’s the same thing whether there’s hair underneath or not.”
Milly smiled and said, “I h
ave all of mine, but I might trim it a bit. What do you say, Sis? What about you? If I am assigned orange, what about you?”
Dan stepped in and said, “Oh, Dotty is getting a nice landing strip and it will be multi-colored. Stripes. That’s what I heard, anyway. It’s not up to me, you girls do what you want, but that’s what I heard.”
Dotty smiled and said, “I’ve heard of this island of water nymphs and their Rainbow Pussy Fruit. And, yes, it’s said that the matriarch has rainbow-colored pubic hair. Of course, no one knows for sure. The whole thing may be nothing more than a myth. On the other hand, this legend of the lost maiden in the fringe miniskirt sounds like something I’d like to see for myself.”
Courtney said, “Would you? That might be arranged.”
I said, “Oh! Wait. I almost forgot. Jett and I have an appointment.”
Jett said, “Oh yeah. That’s right. We have to go upstairs and have an appointment.”
I said, “No, we have an appointment for your job interview.”
Jett looked up in surprise and said, “Oh! That! Daddy, I got a job offer!”
Dan said, “Oh, what kind?”
I said, “Dad, I’d never let anything happen to Jett or Courtney. Ever. But there’s this very classy restaurant dinner club. Not a men’s club, trust me. It’s not that kind of place. It’s very exclusive. They work by invitation, not reservation.”
Dan said, “I’ve heard of this place. It doesn’t even have a name, right?’
I said, “Yeah. But the girls and I went there last night and it was really really nice. And at the end, they asked Jett if she wanted to talk to them about working there. Have you heard anything sleazy about it? It seemed all up and up to me.”
Dan said, “If it’s the same place, no. But Dave, I am just a little dubious that you were in the place I’m thinking of. First of all that you knew about it, second that they let you in, and third that they want to talk to Jett about a job. Did you get the name of the manager or anything? What did the sign on the door say?”
Jett said, “Daddy, the manager guy, or whoever he was, said his name was James. The guy who chose your meal, you don’t get menus and they don’t even ask you what you want, his name was Paul. I was dressed nice, in slacks and a blouse, and they liked me and I liked them and at the end of the night, they said I could come back and talk to them about learning to work there.”
I said, “I called the head of the law firm that represents my family and he made a phone call. I had to fill out a request on the web, but they sent me a text and gave me an address.”
Courtney said, “And they invited Dave to become a member. Dinner was some kind of an interview, or an audition or something. You would have been proud of Jett, Daddy. She was so great.”
Dan said, “Of all the things that have happened in the past couple of days, I think this one takes the cake. Can you take guests? Do you have to blindfold me on the drive there and back? I kid you not, the place really is treated like your legendary island of water nymphs. I heard that the mayor can’t get in unless someone really important takes him. Are you three telling the truth now, or is this a story? This is nothing to joke about.”
Courtney said, “No Daddy. It’s the truth and Dork does have an appointment between one and four.”
Dan said, “This is terrible!”
Jett said, “Why Daddy? It seemed like a nice place and I bet I could make good money and they invited me. They want me. Me. Daddy, somebody wants me. You and Momma want me, I know that. And Dave sure better want me. But this is someone who doesn’t have to. Don’t you see? So what if it’s just a waitress? Oh, I bet it isn’t a waitress. I can’t choose a meal for people. I don’t even know what the forks are for. But maybe I get to start by filling water glasses. But they don’t let just anybody fill the water glasses at this place. The water is probably flown in as pieces of icebergs or something.”
Dan said, “Dave? Have you thought this through? How can Jett work here if you go back to Portland?”
I said, “I can find work here somewhere. Or work remotely for someone, maybe in aerospace. I like it here. And if Jett wants this job, I’ll do anything I have to in order to make that happen for her. Courtney certainly isn’t going back to Portland, so neither will I. We can find a small house to start with and all three of us can work if we need to. I have money, so it won’t be tough. We’d just work for a while because we’re still so young.”
Dotty said, “Oh, stay here! Dan this is amazing. What’s happening to us? Courtney is home, she and Jett are both married to a wonderful man, Jett may have a job she likes, and Milly is here! Finally! And Dan, for Pete’s sake, we have nine bedrooms and seven of them will be empty by this evening when we move the three of them into one room. Make them stay here. Forever.”
Jett said, “Whoa, hang on just a second there. I’m not giving up my own room until I’m married. No way. And I don’t think I should give it up even then.”
Dotty said, “Jett Dear, um, based on your condition, the one where you can’t be alone, what are you going to do? If you want to wait until you’re married, that’s fine. Is that what you want? Now that you are in love?”
Jett grinned and said, “Oh hell no! I’m sleeping in his bed. I’m just not giving up my room. And besides, I don’t know what your threesome looks like, and I don’t want to know. It’s bad enough that…well never mind. But me and Courtney are going to want some quiet time now and then. Hell, Mom had to sleep in my room last night. I think we better plan on two bedrooms each. And ours should be at the opposite end of the house from yours.”
Dotty said, “She has a point.”
Dan said, “Really. Dave, you guys are all welcome to live here with us. Think about it. We don’t need as many cars, as many cooks, as much furniture, or even as much food, because we can share it and benefit from economies of scale. But the main reason is the babies.”
Dotty yelled, “Babies! That clinches it. That and the sex classes that I’ll be teaching for the girls. And maybe the guys too. But Dad’s right. When you have babies, living with us is the only way. Think about it. Milly, you aren’t going back to work, are you? So, two full-time grandmothers taking care of the moms and the babies. They never need a baby sitter unless we all go out together.”
Courtney said, “Dave, they mean it, so don’t even fight it unless there’s a really good reason. They are telling the truth. Say yes or no, but don’t question their sincerity or generosity.”
I smiled and said, “That sounds really good, Dad. Thank you. We’ll live here with all of you, for now at least. I think it sounds great.”
Chapter 26 - Church
The appointment at the restaurant went well. Courtney and I spoke with James about the membership and James had Jett stay and observe. I asked if the place had a name and was told that they called it “The Afra”. James didn’t explain it. After the arrangements were completed, Courtney and I were invited to sit and relax and have iced tea or drinks while we waited for Jett.
Jett was taken around the building, into the kitchen, shown the offices, and told what her duties would be if she accepted a position. Apparently, there were several areas where she could start but was expected to learn as much as she could about all aspects of the inner workings. Her interest was in setup and presentation. Her interview lasted about an hour. They had already decided to hire her the night before, so this was all for Jett.
Back in the car, Jett was excited.
She said, “So, the job is three nights a week and one morning. It’s only like five hours a day, but they pay me for full time. And full benefits. My own health insurance and everything. I asked why Dave doesn’t get his membership free if I work there, but they just said that you don’t. They were so nice about everything. I have a lot to learn. At first, I’ll learn to set the table. Tablecloths, place settings, decorations, and all of that. But it’s like a ritual. They say to think about a Japanese tea ceremony or flower arranging. I’m supposed to learn “the feeling” of
setting a table for guests. Um, and some kind meditation and intuition thing. Like the Camillus, that’s what they call the waiter guy, like how he “sensed” our menu. I’m supposed to sense who will be sitting at my tables. They call me a Camilla. It’s weird and mystical and stuff. But not weird, right? It’s not weird, is it?”
I said, “No, I don’t think so. I think it’s cool.”
She said, “So, I’m supposed to develop this intuition and feeling stuff and be all um, OK, look. It’s not a cult, OK. It’s not. It’s just how they try to make people feel good. It’s like the coolest church you ever want to go to, but you eat dinner instead of listening to a guy talk. You eat and listen to each other. They want people who are going to come to church and connect to something better and more peaceful and that kind of stuff. Like we did last night. It was really healing for me, right? Like we talked and it was holy or something. That’s what they do here! They make a place for um, sacred conversations. So, we’re like these priests. Camillus and Camilla mean boy and girl priest’s assistant. You aren’t weirded out, are you?”
I said, “I am not. Not at all. It sounds amazing. It was amazing.”
Jett said, “I’m so glad you told me not to screw it up last night. I had no idea where we were. If I knew we were at church, I’d have been totally respectful, but you had to tell me to be good. And I’m so glad I was. Thank you so much. I love you, but now I really trust you. We’re closed on Monday and Tuesday, so I come back on Wednesday.”
Courtney asked, “Do you wear robes and stuff?”
Jett said, “No, Stupid. I told you, it isn’t a cult. I have to dress…they said that I need to dress so normal that no one notices me. Like Clark Kent, Superman in disguise. Like if there were aliens from outer space, but they want to be incognito. Remember last night, how I was talking about not knowing what fork to use and suddenly James is there, liked he’d been there the whole time but we just didn’t see him? And I had a question and he wanted to help me and make me comfortable, so he popped up and made me welcome even though I felt out of place? He like made a place for me there. That’s what we do. So, my job is to learn to create that place for people. For sacred conversations. OK, I don’t know if I’m even supposed to tell you this, my job is to make a place for you to hear like God’s voice and be able to talk to each other and see things that you don’t see unless you be quiet and think and feel.”
Desert Trading Post Page 28
