by J. Sterling
Flustered, I tried to fight off the heat that spread throughout my body simply from being near him. I rarely reacted to anyone this way, and I was having a hard time keeping myself in check.
Sure, I was attracted to a handsome face and a hot body as much as the next girl, but this . . . this was something entirely different. Looking at Frank sent shock waves through me. And when he looked at me, it was like he really took his time and saw me. Men in Los Angeles rarely took the time to pay attention to anyone or anything, unless it was their own reflection in a mirror.
“Would you like another, Claudia?”
He spoke slowly, pronouncing my name correctly, and I decided then and there that my name had never sounded as sexy as it did coming out of Frank’s perfect mouth.
I glanced at my glass, which was half full. “I still have some,” I said, swirling the remnants of my Adios Pantalones around inside the glass.
“I could still get you another.” His lips tilted into a slight smile as his gaze burned into mine.
“Okay. Sure.” I smiled back. Or, at least, I hoped I did. My body was numb with all the crazy feelings that Frank triggered in me.
As he walked away, I couldn’t help but watch him go. His ass looked incredible in his jeans, the way they fit him snug and hugged every muscled curve on him. His biceps flexed as he walked, stretching the sleeves of his T-shirt.
“Here.” Britney handed me a cocktail napkin and I took it cautiously, narrowing my eyes in question. “It’s for the drool.”
I tossed the napkin back into her lap. “Asshole.”
“The two of you should get a room. I mean it. I’ve only been here a few times, but I have never, and I mean never, seen Frank mingle with the commoners.”
“And?” I tried to sound like I didn’t care, but I liked what she was hinting at.
“And . . . I think he likes you.”
“He doesn’t even know me.”
“What do you think he’s trying to do? It’s a hell of a lot more than Ryan’s ever done, and I was convinced he liked me. Now I’m not so sure.” Britney tilted her head toward the bar, and I looked to see Ryan smiling and reaching out to touch a woman’s cheek.
He was flirting, but like I’d always thought, it was part of his job. Maybe that’s what Frank was doing too, just being good at his job. I couldn’t let myself pretend something was there that wasn’t. Chastising myself, I tried to reel my heart back to reality.
When a voice called out, “I see the love of my life!” Britney clapped her hands.
I spotted Nick Fisher looking toward the door as a pretty young blonde walked through it, her face flushing red at his words. A petite Latina trailed behind her, smiling and waving at everyone as if they were staring at her. The sight of it made me laugh.
“God, you’re gorgeous. Isn’t she gorgeous, everyone? I love this woman!” Nick shouted, making his way toward the blonde before planting a kiss on her lips and giving the other girl a hug.
“That was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.” I smiled, envious of the very public display of adoration.
“I know, right?” Britney let out a heartfelt sigh. “I want someone to love me like that.”
“Don’t we all?”
I might not be a hopeless romantic like Britney, but I appreciated romance as much as the next girl. I wanted passion in all aspects of my life, especially when it came to love. Finding love in Southern California had been difficult, and meeting a guy who was as passionate about me as he was his career seemed even harder.
Frank reappeared, three drinks in hand, and nudged a small footstool over with his shoe. He sat facing us before handing us each a fresh drink.
“What should we toast to?” Britney asked playfully.
“Your call,” Frank said with a shrug.
“We should toast to finding guys to love us the way Nick loves his girlfriend,” Britney said with a little too much enthusiasm, causing her drink to slosh.
Frank scoffed. “I don’t want a guy to love me like that.”
I burst out laughing. He was so serious, his demeanor kind but reserved. He seemed like he was holding back, but I liked that about him. There was an air of mystery that surrounded Frank. He seemed like the kind of guy who only let a few people get close to him, and that quality only intrigued me more.
“Well, I do,” I said firmly. “I totally do.”
That got Frank’s attention. His eyes bored into mine again. “You do?”
“Definitely.”
He studied me, his head cocked a little to one side. “You’re into over-the-top public displays of affection?”
I thought for a moment, gathering my feelings before wording them properly. “I’m into someone loving me passionately and not caring who knows. When I love, I love hard. I love deep. My love is all consuming. I want to be loved back in the same way. I want to be consumed.”
I took a deep breath after my declaration. The words felt good spilling from my lips, pouring from my heart. I rarely confessed such private feelings to a stranger, but he had asked.
Frank’s lips pursed together with my answer, drawing my attention. “What nationality are you?”
“Colombian,” I said proudly, happy that he asked, that he seemed to care.
“Hence the need for passion.”
I nodded in agreement and offered him a tight-lipped smile. “Hence the difficulty in finding any American guys who have it.”
“Maybe you’re looking at all the wrong guys.”
Was he flirting? I really, really wanted him to be flirting.
“Maybe you’re right. Know anyone I should be looking at instead?” I was definitely flirting.
“I might.”
When he pushed to his feet, I stifled my disappointment. I hadn’t wanted my question to make him leave.
“I have to get back to work,” he said. “If I leave Ryan alone for too long, he’ll burn the place down.”
I had completely forgotten that Frank was working. It was easy to forget when you sat in a place like this, drinking delicious cocktails and having good conversations. Or what was the start of a good conversation.
Britney lit up at the mention of Ryan’s name. “Frank, wait!” she called out, and he stopped to turn back to her. “What’s his deal, anyway?”
“Ryan’s?” His dark eyebrows drew together.
“Yeah. Does he have a girlfriend? Does he date? He’s super flirty with me all the time, and I’m just trying to get a good read on him, because I can’t really. At all. I don’t know what any of it means coming from him.”
Frank shifted his weight, like the question made him slightly uncomfortable. Or maybe it was that he’d been asked it a million times before. “Ryan’s extremely flirty. He always has been. He does date, but he hasn’t in quite a while. Do you want me to tell you the truth or keep you hopeful?”
“Truth,” I said at the same time that Britney answered with, “Hopeful.”
We both laughed, and Frank smiled.
“The truth is that he’s not looking for a relationship right now. He’s most likely just flirting with you because that’s the way Ryan is. He can’t help it; it’s in his nature. He’s really friendly, and he wants everyone to love him.”
“Unlike you?” I asked, and Frank shot me a look.
“I don’t need everyone to love me. Just the right ones.” With that, he turned and headed back toward the bar, which had finally started to clear out.
Britney seemed to deflate, her enthusiasm draining out of her in a long, dramatic sigh. “I guess it was all in my head.”
I tossed my arm around her shoulder. “The flirting was real. It just didn’t mean what you wanted it to. I’m sorry, Brit.”
“It’s okay. I’ll still crush on him because I can’t even help it.” She took another sip of her drink. “And you’ll still crush on Frank because you can’t help it either.”
I choked on my drink before pulling away from her. Pounding on my chest, I shot her a crazed look.
I wanted to argue with her, but the denial died in my throat.
She was right, and it was pointless to try to say otherwise.
What Was That
Frank
I sat in the office, willing time to pass faster.
Actually, I was hiding. Hiding from Claudia, hiding from whatever these feelings were, hiding from my brothers.
Hiding from the truth.
Since we’d opened the bar, I’d never spent time hanging with any of the customers. Unlike Nick, who lost all control of his balls whenever Jess walked through the doors, I didn’t want to mix my personal and professional life. I’d convinced myself that they shouldn’t cross over, and told Shelby that as well.
Thank God she listened and stayed away most of the time. She was a middle-school teacher and was always busy planning lessons or grading papers, and went to sleep at a decent hour like regular people. On the rare occasion that she had stopped in the bar, I tended to hole up in the office, wishing she’d leave.
Fuck, that made me sound like a real asshole. And you know what? Maybe I was. I didn’t know anymore.
I wasn’t sure of anything after tonight, and I hadn’t even technically done anything wrong. But I had acted out of character, and Ryan and Nick both knew it.
I could tell they couldn’t wait to give me shit about it by the way they were both casting glances at me. Ryan especially. I wasn’t sure exactly what I’d say when they started questioning me, but I knew I needed to deny, deny, deny.
Whatever the hell the truth was, I wasn’t ready to admit it to my brothers, let alone to myself. I was the responsible one, the oldest, the one who didn’t fly by the seat of his pants. Somehow in all of my making the right decisions and choices, I’d ended up in a relationship that no longer brought me happiness. And to be honest, I hadn’t been happy in years.
Yet Shelby still stayed and never complained. God, that woman was a saint. What kind of man falls out of love with a saint?
Glancing at the clock, I noted the time and headed out of the office and into the nearly empty bar. Almost everyone had left, including Jess and her friend.
Claudia and Britney, however, were right where I’d left them.
I wasn’t sure if I was relieved that Claudia hadn’t left without saying good-bye, or nervous that she was still here. I stared at her profile, memorizing the way her hair moved as she did, wondering what it would feel like in my hands. Was it as soft as it looked? What did it smell like?
“Last call!” Nick shouted as he rang the bell that hung in the corner of the bar, making my thoughts crash-land back into reality.
Ryan and Nick both turned to me, waiting for me to deliver my regular line. With a smile, I addressed the small crowd.
“You don’t have to go home,” I yelled.
And they responded, “But you can’t stay here!”
“That’s right!” Man, I loved this bar. I threw my fist in the air and glanced toward Claudia, who was staring right at me. I gave her a small smile, and that strange pull I’d felt before came roaring back to life as she smiled back.
“Hey, Ryan?” a woman shouted, and I rolled my eyes.
“Yeah, sweetheart?” Ryan answered with a fake Southern drawl and tipped his nonexistent cowboy hat.
Shaking my head, I looked at Nick, who watched with an amused grin.
“Can I get an Adios . . .” the woman called out, pausing.
A handful of women shouted “Pantalones!” in unison, finishing her order.
I groaned as my idiot brother removed his shirt and tossed it on the register behind him, then proceeded to make the drink.
Every.
Damn.
Night.
We really needed to stop this stupid tradition. I wasn’t even sure how it started in the first place, but I couldn’t remember a night it hadn’t happened. Maybe once Ryan got an actual girlfriend, he’d keep his damn clothes on. Or maybe I could convince him to only take his clothes off on the weekends instead of every single night?
After most of the customers had left, I was closing out the registers when I heard the sound of Claudia’s voice.
“It was nice to meet you, Frank.” She leaned against the wood railing and gave me a smile.
That smile, just for me, was fucking beautiful. She was beautiful. I wanted to hop across the bar that separated us and give her a hug good night, and I didn’t hug women I didn’t know.
Screw that. I wanted to pull her body against mine so I could feel every curve, every bit of her softness pressed against me.
Suddenly, I was torn between not wanting her to leave and needing her to get the hell out of my bar as soon as possible. It was a damn challenge keeping my body away from hers.
Jesus, Fisher, pull it together.
“It was nice to meet you too.” I smiled back at her and kept my distance. But as she and her friend neared the front door, I found myself shouting, “See you soon?”
Claudia stopped and turned around, her gaze locking on mine. “Couldn’t stay away if I tried.” Her lips curved into a mischievous grin, and I watched her ass as she disappeared from view.
“What the hell was that?” Ryan raised his brows at me as he locked the front doors behind the girls. They had been the last ones to leave, no doubt waiting for something.
I hid any reaction from him, remaining stoic. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Bullshit,” Nick said with a laugh, and I shot him a murderous glare that shut him up.
I continued going through the night’s receipts as I tried to ignore them, but my brothers were nothing if not persistent. And annoying. They were fucking annoying.
“What was that? Seriously, I’ve never seen you act like that before.” Ryan tossed a wet rag at my back, and I picked it up and fisted it before turning around to face him.
Twirling the rag quickly with one hand, I asked, “Like what, exactly?” before whipping it against his thigh with a loud snap.
“Fuck! That hurt!” Ryan hopped around on one foot like I’d shot him as he attempted to rub out the welt that was probably forming underneath his jeans.
I smiled, happy with my rag-swatting abilities as Nick chimed in.
“I haven’t worked here long, but even I’ve never seen you get all dopey around a chick before.”
My smile fell instantly. “I do not get dopey.”
“You were a little dopey,” Ryan bit out, still hopping around. When I pretended to ready the rag for action again, Ryan’s hands flew up in the air. “Fine, you were smitten. Or grumpy. Or whatever other dwarf names there are. Definitely not dopey.”
“There’s no dwarf named Smitten. What’s wrong with you?” Nick scowled at him as he unloaded a tray of dirty glasses.
“It’s not like we don’t get the appeal,” Ryan said before turning to Nick. “Right, Nick? Claudia was insanely hot.”
Nick simply shrugged. He didn’t talk about other girls now that he and Jess were back together.
Obviously frustrated, Ryan continued to push. “Just admit that you were attracted to the girl. Can you do that?”
“Why do you even care?” I demanded, doing my best to deflect. “Oh, I get it. You like Claudia, and you’re pissed she likes me.”
Ryan and Nick both started laughing, and Nick said, “Oh yeah, Frank. That’s exactly it.”
Tamping down the urge to throw something heavy at each of their heads, I tried desperately to think of a way to shut them up.
I wasn’t the kind of man who flirted with women, didn’t want to do dirty things to women who weren’t my girlfriend. But, apparently, I did. And I needed my brothers to stop reminding me about what an asshole I had apparently become in the course of one evening. The guilt stampeding through me made me irritable.
“Can you two just shut up for one second?” I snapped as I pulled the final paperwork from the registers and credit card machines.
“We’re not trying to upset you, bro. It’s just that we’ve never seen you go out o
f your way to talk to anyone before. You looked happy.” Nick shrugged one shoulder. “That’s all I want to say.”
“You did look happy,” Ryan said. “It’s okay to be interested in someone, or find a girl attractive. It’s normal.”
I bristled because it wasn’t okay. “Not when you have a girlfriend, it’s not.”
Nick nodded. “Can’t argue with that.”
For once I was thankful for his over-the-top love for Jess. I only wished that my feelings were for the same reasons, but I knew they were more out of obligation and doing the right thing than my actual love for Shelby.
“I’m gonna go update the books,” I said, ending the conversation and heading into the office.
The sound of them talking quietly filtered into the office, and I did my best to tune them out. I left the door open, but hoped they would leave the subject—and me—alone.
• • •
Thankfully, both Ryan and Nick took the hint and laid off me for the rest of the night. They even walked with me out to our cars without saying another word about Claudia, which was both a surprise and a relief.
I’d have another twenty-four hours’ reprieve from them since Thursdays were my days off. We each took one day off during the week, but sometimes even that turned into a workday. It was hard to stay away from the bar when you loved it as much as we all did.
After walking through the door to the condo I shared in Marina del Rey with Shelby, I slipped off my shoes and padded softly down the hallway. She’d be sleeping, and I hated waking her up on a school night. Not that she would have minded.
I flipped on the light in the bathroom, then turned on the shower and peeled off my clothes. I stepped in, closing my eyes and allowing myself to get lost momentarily in the steam, enjoying the hot water pounding on my head and shoulders.
Claudia’s image appeared in my mind, and I shook my head in vain to get rid of it. She smiled, and my dick sprang to attention. It was too late. There would be no getting rid of her now.
It was wrong, but I couldn’t stop. Squeezing some body wash into my hand, I gently lathered it up before rubbing it on the length of my dick. I moved my hand up and down as Claudia’s dark brown eyes appeared in my imagination. My hand worked my flesh harder and faster as I pictured her full lips sucking the head of my cock. I closed my eyes, mentally fisting her jet-black hair in one hand as she took me deep into her mouth, as far as she could take me.
