Like she was going to answer him. Besides, she figured it was obvious—away from him.
“Molly, you will stop. Now.”
She raised her hand and flipped him the bird.
Did she seriously just give me the finger? He forced himself to take a deep, fortifying breath as she strode down the middle of the road. What was she doing? She didn’t seriously think she could just walk all the way into Haven, did she? And why wasn’t she walking on the side of the road where it was safer?
Damn female was a mix of wisdom and brains and sheer, utter idiocy. She was obviously angry with him for sending Duncan off on that deathtrap she was driving, but did she honestly believe he’d allow her to ride around on that? Anything could have happened to her. She could have had an accident. She could have ended up in a ditch, injured and alone, and he’d have had no idea where to find her.
Jake closed his eyes. After Duncan left, he’d needed a few moments to get his roiling emotions under control. He knew this was a trigger for him. Rebecca’s death had just honed his need for making sure those around him were safe. His job had only increased that need.
And then Molly had come along. He was attracted to her, he’d claimed her, and he was learning just how little command he had over her. What had gone through her head when she’d borrowed that thing? She couldn’t possibly think he’d be okay with it. Hadn’t they talked about safety last night?
But maybe she hadn’t realized he was serious about that. Or perhaps she didn’t think what she’d been doing was dangerous? Well, she was going to find out now. As soon as he caught up to her. He sighed as he noticed her approaching a bend in the road. Soon she’d be out of sight. And was she . . . yep, she was limping. Cursing himself for forgetting about her weak ankle and wondering if she hadn’t been entirely honest about how well healed it was, he climbed into his car and safely turned it around before driving off after her.
She didn’t even turn around. Just kept walking. He climbed out of the car. “Molly, this is silly. You’re not walking back to town. You’re limping. Get in the car.”
She whirled around, and he frowned when he saw how upset she was. He noticed her blinking rapidly and wondered if she was she close to tears. The thought of it was like in the kick in the gut. She was always so happy, so together. Even last night when it was clear she was really upset, she hadn’t cried. So why did this bring her to tears?
“Now I’m silly! I’m an idiot and silly. Wow, I’m a real winner, huh?”
“I did not call you an idiot and I said that walking off, especially when you’re in the middle of nowhere and you’re limping, was silly. You want to tell me why you stormed off like that?”
“No.”
Guess he’d asked for that one.
She turned away. Oh, no, they weren’t doing that again. He poured as much command as he had into his voice. “Molly, stop.”
She stilled. Thank you, God. He didn’t know what he would have done if she’d kept going. Probably have grabbed her and thrown her over his shoulder. But he was glad it hadn’t come to that. A kidnapping charge wasn’t a good thing for a sheriff. He walked up to her, facing her. He reached out and grasped her chin, tipping her face up. “I can see we have quite a few things to address, sub. But, first, you’re going to get in the car and off that sore ankle.”
“It’s fine,” she muttered.
“From now on, those two words are stricken from your vocabulary, do you understand me? Your ankle is not fine. You are not fine, and you insult me by trying to pretend you are.”
“How is that an insult?”
“It is my job as your Dom to take care of you. I can’t do that if you’re dishonest with me. Unless you’re planning on breaking the contract we signed last night.”
“How does that have anything to do with this?”
He looked down at her in confusion for a moment.
“That contract is about playing together, right?”
“Much of it is,” he agreed. “But there’s a clause in there about your safety, remember that? My job as your Dom is to ensure you are happy and healthy. I can only do that if you communicate with me. If something happens to you, then I need to know. If you’re sick or hurting, I need to know. How else will I take care of you?”
She frowned slightly. “I’m not sick or hurting.”
Oh, no, she wasn’t getting away with that. He pointedly glanced down at her ankle. “Really? You want to rethink that? There’s a stiff penalty for lying.”
“My ankle is sore, but only because I’m walking too fast on it on an uneven surface. Which I wouldn’t be if you hadn’t taken my bike!”
“And I took that bike from you to stop you from getting hurt!” he snapped back at her.
“So I have to communicate everything I’m thinking or feeling with you and you get to give me the silent treatment?”
“What are you talking about? What silent treatment?”
“Before.” She waved her hand back down the road. “You wouldn’t talk to me. I had enough of that before. I’m too old and life is too short for petty games. I won’t play them.”
Right. Seemed she wasn’t the only one who needed to work on communication.
“Molly, I wasn’t giving you the silent treatment. I promise.”
Her gaze narrowed, but she wasn’t turning away from him.
“I have a few things I need to tell you, but first I want you sitting and off that foot, all right?”
After a few seconds, she nodded, and he quickly swung her up into his arms.
“Hey! You could warn a girl.”
“I don’t think so.” He reached the car and gently set her down before opening the passenger door. She sat down, but he grabbed her legs before she could swing them in. “I want to look at your ankle.”
“It’s f—” she bit the word off, obviously remembering his order.
He hid a smile. “Just as well you stopped yourself. Every time I hear that phrase, I’m giving you ten.”
“I’m confused,” she told him as he carefully took off her shoe. She was wearing a pair of lightweight, canvas sneakers. Not at all something she should wear while riding a motorcycle, but he bit back his reprimand. That wasn’t going to help. This wasn’t about her footwear. This wasn’t even really about the motorcycle. It was about her safety in general. If she was his . . . his training sub then she had to learn he expected her to look after herself, or else he would.
“I know, kitten. We need to have a talk.” He clicked his tongue as he stared down at her puffy ankle. He prodded it gently. She winced.
“Fine, huh? Doesn’t exactly look that way. I thought Doc said it was better.”
“It is better. It didn’t feel this bad last night.”
“What made you think it was a good idea to ride a motorcycle with an injured ankle?”
“You’re angry about me riding the bike while my ankle is still healing?” she asked.
He sighed. “I’m not angry, Molly.”
“Could have fooled me.”
“I was scared.”
There was silence. He glanced up from his crouched position to find her staring down at him in surprise. “Scared? You? But . . . you . . .”
“Yes?”
“I don’t get it. Why are you scared?”
“Because I care about you, Molly. I know our contract mainly covers play in the club, but I can’t turn off my feelings for you just because we’re no longer at Saxons. And once I claimed you I became responsible for you while you’re living in Haven.”
“I don’t know if I want anyone to be responsible for me,” she muttered.
He reached up and brushed her hair back. “But someone has been responsible for you since you arrived. You just didn’t realize it. And you read that clause about safety. You knew it went beyond just play.”
“I knew that safety clause was going to bite me in the butt.”
“Oh, honey, I wouldn’t worry about your butt being bitten. Paddled, yes.”
> “So you weren’t giving me the silent treatment before as punishment because I did something you didn’t like?”
“I will never give you the silent treatment. Doms are all about communication. No doubt you’ll get sick of the sound of my voice.”
“I’m used to listening to people.” She gave him a small smile, and that tight knot in his stomach eased.
“We need to get you home and get some ice on that ankle.”
She bit her lip, looking like she wanted to protest but then she nodded. “All right.”
He helped her settle in and then buckled her seat belt, deliberately brushing his arm across her breasts. She shivered. He turned her face to his and laid a soft kiss on her lips. “When we get home you’re going to tell me who in your life gave you the silent treatment.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Don’t you think life’s too short to bring up the past?”
“No, not when it affects your actions now.” He raised one eyebrow sternly. “I can’t have you storming off like that every time we have a small disagreement. It’s not healthy or safe. So when we get home we’re going to talk. Both of us. We need to get clear about a few things.”
Molly turned to Jake as he pulled up outside a white, clapboard house with a wrap-around porch and dark gray trim. Cheerful yellow and white flowers were planted in beds along the front of the house. “Is this your place?”
She’d thought they were going back to her apartment.
“Yep,” he replied.
They hadn’t done much talking on the drive back, but it hadn’t been an awkward silence. She’d taken the time to do some thinking and she’d realized he was right. She hadn’t acted very rationally to what she’d perceived as an action on his part. And she was generally a very rational person. But her emotions had been in overdrive. Which probably meant she needed to explain about Richard, much as she hated the thought of giving him anymore of her time. But she might not have worked through all of her issues surrounding that relationship.
“It’s gorgeous. Nice flowers.”
He looked up at the house for a moment. “It’s a house. And one of my neighbors takes care of the garden.”
She studied him for a moment. He didn’t consider it his home? In fact, he didn’t seem to have much of an attachment at all. Which was fine, she’d had no attachment to her apartment in New York, either. But she’d still called it home. It had felt like a sanctuary after getting out of that relationship.
“Stay there, I’ll come around and get you,” he told her.
She undid her seatbelt and waited for him to open the passenger door. He scooped her up into his arms again. This time she didn’t even protest. He set her down on the porch so he could unlock the front door, and she glanced over at the porch swing with longing. The house looked out onto a quiet cul-de-sac. The houses were set on large lots, so his neighbors weren’t close by, but, still, she could imagine sitting out here in the evening and waving to people as they walked past.
“Mind if I test out your porch swing?”
He glanced over at the swing as though stunned to see it there. He shrugged. “Sure. I don’t really use it. Came with the house.”
From what she’d gathered Jake did very little but work, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise to her that he didn’t sit out here and just be. She limped over and sat.
“I’ll get an ice pack and be right back,” he told her. He hesitated for a moment. “Stay there.”
She saluted him.
He gave her a stern look in reply, so she waited until he was inside to grin. Then she turned to look out, watching as a couple of kids sped past on their bikes. A sense of longing filled her. She loved kids. But even if she’d had the opportunity to have one, she knew she couldn’t risk leaving them. She knew what it was like to lose a parent. She wouldn’t do that to her own child.
She glanced up as Jake stepped onto the porch. He carried two glasses of iced tea, and an ice pack was shoved down the front of his pants. She glanced down with an arched brow. “Needed to cool yourself down?”
He grinned. “Something like that.”
She loved that she could make him smile. He didn’t do it enough and when he did . . . whew, he went from gorgeous to fucking hot.
He handed her a glass of iced tea. “Drink.” She gulped some down. She hadn’t realized how thirsty she was. He sat next to her on the swing and patted his lap. “Feet up here.”
She wrinkled her nose. “You sure? It’s been kind of hot today, and after that walk they’re probably not smelling the best.”
“Molly,” he said in a warning voice. She shrugged then took off her shoes and turned, resting her feet on his lap. He placed the ice pack on her sore foot. She hissed at the feel of the chill against her hot skin.
“It will feel better soon. Are you sure you’re not supposed to be using the crutches?”
“Doc said I was fine to stop using them. It just gets a bit swollen when I’ve been walking on it too much.”
He sent her a look.
“Yes, yes, I know. Bad Molly.” She slapped her hand.
He raised his eyebrows. “If you think that’s the only place that will be getting a smack today, you’ve got another think coming.”
“Why, Sheriff, you do say the sweetest things, tell me more.” Strange thing was, even though she was teasing, her body had heated at his words. Her buttocks clenched at the idea of his hand slapping against her bare skin.
“If you like that then you’ll love me telling you that I’ve got plans to use a spreader bar, handcuffs, a butt plug, and crop on you.”
“I think I just came a little.” Her voice was a little breathless. Then she laughed. “God, if someone had told me a few months ago I’d be sitting here asking a man to tell me how he was going to tie me up and spank me . . . well . . . I’d have had asked them how I could make it happen sooner.”
He leaned back in the swing, starting it moving back and forth. “Why didn’t you explore your needs earlier?”
She shrugged. “Lack of opportunity? Motivation?” Nothing like learning you were going to die to give you a much-needed kick on the behind.
“Partner you could trust?” he guessed.
“Yeah. Guess that was a big one. My last relationship was a disaster.”
He made a noise in the back of his throat, urging her to continue.
“Richard was unimaginative in the bedroom, and that’s putting it politely. I once asked him to give me a few slaps on the ass. He was horrified. He told me he was not abusive to women and that perhaps I should stop reading those filthy romances since they were obviously giving me perverted ideas.”
“Asshole.”
“Well, in a way he was right. I did get a lot of my fantasies from those books. Little did I know then the reality could actually measure up.”
“Measure up? Hmm, seems I have work to do. It should be exceeding them.”
“Maybe they will be tonight.”
He took a sip of the tea, looking out over the neighborhood. He was never off-duty, it seemed. “Do you ever take off your sheriff hat and just relax?”
He pointed at his bare head.
She rolled her eyes. “You know I didn’t mean literally.”
Instead of answering right away, he seemed to think about it for a bit. “Nope, guess I’m pretty much always on. Probably the closest I come to relaxing is when I’m playing.”
“Then I’m glad smacking my butt helps you relax.”
“Oh, smacking your butt does more than help me relax. I think it might be my happy place.”
She laughed. “Might just become mine as well.”
“Well, I went easy on you last night, so you might want to wait a bit before making that call.”
That was easy? Shit.
“So was this ex of yours the one who gave you the silent treatment.”
She tensed at the question. Damn it, she’d kind of hoped he might have forgotten. Yeah, fat chance of that. She doubted Jake forgot a thing.<
br />
“Yep, he was.” Knowing he wasn’t going to take that as a full answer, she certainly wouldn’t, she took a deep breath. Time to get this over and done with. “Sometimes he’d punish me by not talking to me for days. Pretty much ignoring me entirely. Once he brought takeout home and just sat there and ate it himself. I went to bed without dinner. Lost my appetite.”
Jake frowned. “And what did you do that was so terrible?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Usually it was something he didn’t approve of. Something not normal.”
“Not normal?”
She shrugged. “I missed this important dinner he had for work once because one of my patients had a breakdown and was in the emergency room after trying to commit suicide.”
“And he was angry with you over that?” Jake gave her a look of disbelief.
“Apparently it was a very important dinner,” she said bitterly.
He placed his hand on her thigh, running it up and down her leg soothingly.
“He seemed to know how much I hated when he did that.” She swallowed heavily. “Damn, this is hard to talk about. It made me feel so small. Like I was useless. Like I couldn’t do anything right. I’m a smart, educated woman. I give advice to other people about how to cope with their feelings, but I couldn’t stop myself from feeling that way.”
“Of course you hated it. Most people would, but it’s especially hard on a submissive.”
“But I didn’t know I was a submissive back then.”
“Honey, you don’t think it’s something you just developed now, do you? It’s not as obvious with you because you hide so much behind your jokes and smile. You’re tough. You’re strong. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be hurt. And we’re always hurt more by people who are supposed to care for us.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“He knew it would hurt you. That’s why he did it. He might not have known what you are, but he could see your reaction. You want to help people. To please them. Not doing what he wanted probably led to feelings of guilt, which were compounded by his behavior. Losing any touch or communication would be like slowly starving you.”
“I think I’d have preferred it if he’d yelled at me.”
Molly's Man (Haven, Texas Book 4) Page 12
