by M. E. Carter
Oh boy. I should not have a crush on my boss. Shouldn’t, but do.
Even now as I take a free minute to load the dirty glasses into the dishwasher rack, I’m thinking about his broad chest and how it gives me the feeling there is some raw power behind his calm demeanor. It’s not just his physique though. We also have interesting conversations in between customers and share laughs regularly. Altogether, it’s a recipe for my hormones to flare every time we work together. This is why my new routine on the drive over every night is to chant “he’s my boss and off-limits. He’s my boss and off-limits,” hoping it’ll sink it. It never does.
I will admit, however, my job is more pleasant because we all get along well. Whether it’s Paul or even Tammy, I really do enjoy being here. It’s not a dance studio, but it’s a great consolation job.
The only downside is working nights. I’m not a night owl by nature, and it only gives me half days with my baby. Speaking of, I take advantage of the few minutes of downtime I have to wipe my hands off and grab my phone, pulling up the video Lauren sent me earlier. In it, Carson and Heath are standing in front of the television dancing to The Incredibles theme song and pretending to be super heroes. Health grabs my boy and takes off around the room, making Carson fly while he giggles and squeals. I slump against the counter as I watch, happy he’s having a good time, but also sad I’m not there to see it in person.
I take a deep breath to center myself. Yes, it sucks that I’m not with him but I recognize two important things—most single moms have less time than I do with their kids, and most single moms don’t have a pseudo-family to lean on when necessary. I know Carson is in the best hands when I’m gone even if it’s tough on me.
Getting back to work, I take a moment to rinse out the shaker from my last batch of martinis, and I barely hear the door open until someone calls out.
“Hey, bartender!” Lauren yells and my stomach immediately jumps with excitement. Having spent the last few minutes thinking of the love of my life, and knowing Lauren is with him tonight has me automatically assuming my pudgy baby is probably running in with her looking for me. When I don’t hear him, I deflate just a little, but quickly finish what I’m doing. My best friend is still here, after all.
“Where’s my boy?” I inquire as she eases up to the bar.
“He is still at the house with Uncle Heath. They are on hour two of reading all the books.”
I pop open a new pale ale I want her to try and hand it over. “You’re exaggerating.”
“Nope. Remember how I told you Uncle Heath wants Carson to feel at home with us?”
“Oh, god. What did he do?”
“Three words… Barnes. And. Noble.”
I groan. “You really need to give that man some offspring.”
“Hell no. The minute I pop out a baby, my gymnastics days are over. Unless Depends comes out with a brand of leotards which I am uninterested in trying out, I’m good letting Heath dote on your kid for a long, long time.” She takes a sip of the drink. “What is this anyway?”
“It’s an apple pie pale ale. Something new Paul wanted us to try out and see what customers think before stocking it for the fall.” I raise my eyebrows in question as she tries it a second time.
She licks her lips before giving me her opinion. “I like it. I’m not a huge ale drinker but this is something I could go for.”
“Good to know.” I toss the bottle cap in the trash. “We’ve tried it with a couple of our regulars who gave two thumbs up, but they’ve all been older men. I’ll let Paul know the female demographic approves as well.”
Glancing around, I quickly make sure everyone’s glasses are still full before leaning against the bar and taking a breather.
“What brings you out tonight anyway? I expected you to be on viewing number six hundred of The Incredibles tonight.”
Lauren groans. “I love your son but I’m really sick of that movie. It’s wildly unfair that Elastagirl has mom hips and still looks fantastic in her costume.”
“Maybe because she’s a cartoon.”
“I don’t care. Disney needs to think about the kind of image they’re portraying for the women out there. It’s depressing.”
I snicker. She’s ridiculous sometimes. “Leotard envy is what drove you out tonight, huh?”
She takes an even longer swig and drops her bottle on the counter. “Actually, Annika called me. She wants to get out of the house. I guess Jaxon is doing a volunteer clinical tonight and she didn’t feel like being home by herself.”
“That’s unlike her. Married life must be making her needy if she wants to go to a bar.”
This time Lauren laughs. “Maybe. Secretly I think she just wants to show off the pictures from her honeymoon and this is a good way to catch us both at the same time.”
“Don’t sound annoyed with it. You know you’re dying to see them.”
Lauren sighs loudly and drops her chin onto her hand. “You’re not wrong. I’m just so damn happy for them. They give me hope.”
A loud thunk reverberates through the room. Looks like Dwayne found the new dartboard Paul had installed.
“What kind of hope do you need? You’re living with your professional football player boyfriend in his giant house. If anyone should be looking for inspiration in the relationships around here, it should be me.”
Lauren pulls her bottle to her lips but peeks up through her eyelashes at me, batting them just slightly. It’s a clear sign I’m not going to like what she has to say next.
“I’m pretty sure Paul’s single.”
I shake my head. I was hoping she wouldn’t go there but I knew that was coming eventually. “I will admit he’s nice to look at and a really great guy. Plus, he’s a little older and that maturity is damn attractive… “Shaking my head, I pull myself out of the rabbit hole I’m falling in and refocus. “But he’s also my boss which makes him a no-go.”
Lauren gestures with her hand like my boundary is irrelevant. “Who cares? You’re both adults and it’s not like Tammy is single. There’s no competition.”
Speaking of my co-worker, she makes her way over just as her name is said.
“Why am I no competition? What are we competing about anyway? It’s not that damn dartboard, is it? I swear I’m gonna get nailed in the head one of these days.”
“I hope not. I don’t do blood well,” I say, making sure to quickly move to another topic. “Does Dwayne need another?”
“Nope,” Tammy replies and I’m hopeful she forgot the original question. “Says he doesn’t need his beer to taste all fruity. Wants to go back to Dos Equis.”
Amused, I grab a bottle from the small fridge and pop the top. “Well, I appreciate his attempt at trying to be refined through drink, even if it didn’t last long.”
Tammy huffs a laugh. “Yeah, that’s what it is. An attempt at being sophisticated. It has nothing to do with the alcohol content.”
“It has the same percent as Coors Light.”
Tammy holds up her hand to stop me. “I know that honey. He just doesn’t seem to and I’m not correcting him. The last thing he needs is anything over four-point-two proof. Now,” she turns to Lauren, “What am I apparently competing for and what is the prize?”
I groan. I was hoping we moved past this. Lauren, on the other hand, is delighted.
Leaning in like she’s telling Tammy a secret she says, “Paul. He’s single, right?”
A look of understanding crosses Tammy’s face. “Ah yes. That man is a tall drink of man-candy for sure.”
I burst out laughing at her candor while Lauren exclaims, “That’s what I said. But she won’t go for it.”
“I am not sleeping with my boss, Lauren. It’s in bad taste.”
Lauren drops her chin to her chest grumbling, “She’s such a buzzkill.” Tammy, on the other hand, doesn’t ever mince words. Not even now.
“Listen, honey, there are only three of us here and my man has no reason to worry about me straying so I’m not goi
ng to make a drama out of you banging the boss behind closed doors.” Lauren gestures her hand in an “I told you so” fashion, but Tammy’s not done. “Unless you do it in the office when I’m trying to get my stuff, I’m the last person who will raise a stink about some good old fashion lovemaking.”
Lauren can’t help it. She starts giggling. I need to double-check the alcohol content on this apple pie. Giggles mean it’s already going to her head.
“Besides,” Tammy continues. “That tight little twenties body isn’t going to last forever. You better get your kicks while you can. Take it from someone who made sure she’d have lots of memories to last a lifetime.”
I shake my head at her and then gesture my understanding as Dwayne holds his beer up and waves it at me.
“I will take that under advisement. But Dwayne is getting antsy over there so maybe we can table this conversation.”
Tammy rolls her eyes. “It’s a wonder that man can keep his electricity on with how much he spends every night.”
“He’s just lonely,” I argue. “He’s not doing any harm.”
“Yet. Like I said,” she says as she picks up the bottle. “One of these days a dart is gonna get me right in the noggin. Mark my words.”
She walks away, making quick work of delivering Dwayne’s drink and bussing the recently vacated tables.
“I like her.” Lauren slaps her hand on the counter.
My eyes widen in amusement. “Okay, drunky.” I slowly pull the beer away from her. “No more ale for you tonight.”
“Oh stop. I’m not drunk.” She snatches the bottle back. “I just really want you to get laid. I think Tammy does, too.”
“As much as I appreciate that, the last time I was laid, I ended up a single mom. It’s probably best not to tempt fate that way. Want something else?”
“Yeah. Give me another one of those apple pie things. Also, it’s sad you haven’t had sex in over three years.”
She shudders which elicits a laugh from me.
“And you’re ridiculous,” she continues. “Just because you got pregnant one time doesn’t mean it’ll happen again.”
“No, it doesn’t.” I pop the top off another bottle and hand it to her, leaning on the counter. “But we both know how that ended and I think it’s best if I avoid flippant relationships.”
Her eyes darken as we both remember the shit show Spence put me through, even after he died. I quickly push it out of my mind. I don’t want to think about it. It’s over. I will never go through that again. And I’ll be damned if I put my son through it.
“Fine,” she finally concedes. “You win. This time. But I’m not going to give up on helping you find a man. You deserve some happiness.
“I have happiness. His name is Carson and he’s almost three years old. He has a fantastic Aunt Lauren and an even better Uncle Heath.”
“Hey!” she protests playfully. I ignore her.
“And as much as I love that he has them, I just hope they all don’t become so attached that he gets hurt when they do finally have kids.”
She shakes her head and swallows her drink that seems to have gotten stuck in her throat temporarily. “Not gonna happen. My man doesn’t love just anyone. But once he decides you’re part of his inner circle, you’re in for life. And Carson is basically his whole circle these days. That’s what happens when a grown man who is still a boy at heart has too much money and finds someone he can buy toys for, which is really just him justifying buying toys.”
I laugh out loud and grab a glass, filling it with ice and some Dr. Pepper to give me a shot of caffeine. “Is that what it is?”
“Absolutely. I’m not sure which one of them is more spoiled. Heath is already planning Carson’s birthday party.”
My jaw drops in shock. “Are you kidding me?”
“Nope. I hope that doesn’t bother you.”
“It doesn’t,” I say with a laugh. “You know I’m the worst party planner.”
“Which is why I didn’t hire you to plan my wedding,” an unexpected voice says.
“Annika!” Lauren gives her a tight hug, as surprised as I am that we didn’t see her come in. “You look fantastic. Very tan and rested.”
I nod in agreement. Honeymooning looks good on her.
“Thanks,” Annika says sheepishly and turns to me. “Hi, Kiersten. Can I get my usual?”
“One unopened bottle of water, coming right up.”
As suspected, Annika opens her phone and holds up a picture of her lounging in a cabana, white sand and crystal blue water in the background.
Lauren snatches the phone from her and gasps at the photo. “Annika, this is beautiful. And damn girl. Look at you being all super-model like with your sexy one-piece and floppy hat. I didn’t even know you owned a floppy hat.”
“It was an impulse buy in the airport,” she explains while surveying over Lauren’s shoulder as she swipes through the pics. She absentmindedly plays with the label on her water bottle as she tells us all about their honeymoon and everything they did. From what I’m gathering, it was a whole lot more of what we saw in that picture—mostly lounging around in a cabana with a couple of tours through the rainforests. It sounds heavenly and I can’t help but wonder if I’ll ever be as happy and in love as she is. I ignore the small pang of jealousy as I watch my two best girlfriends chat about their lives, each as one part of a happy couple.
Instead, I do my best to focus on the important parts. I have a good job, a great son, and friends who seek me out at my place of employment so I can at least be part of the conversation, even if it’s in between customers. It isn’t a girl’s night, but things could be worse than making money while chatting with my friends.
NINE
Paul
Looking around the room, I try to envision the changes I want to make to this place. Obviously, we need a few upgrades and a solid coat of paint. Past that, I’m still kind of stumped.
The biggest and most pressing issue is what to do about the stage. Do I keep it or get rid of it? I’ve never actually seen live music in this place, not even before I took over, and I’m not sure where I would begin if I decided to make that happen. Do I even want to open that can of worms? It sounds like a lot of coordination and one more project for me to have to tackle. I don’t know if I have it in me at this point. The only thing I do know is I need to make some changes pretty soon.
Kiersten walks up. I don’t have to see her to know. I can smell her shampoo before I see her. Damn she smells good. “Hey, boss. Whatcha doing?”
It’s just us tonight. Tammy is taking advantage of the fact that both she and her husband are off and have a date night planned. She’s been talking about it non-stop for the last couple of days. I’m glad the timing worked out for them.
I’m also glad she isn’t here to interrupt my thoughts. I’ve talked about renovations before but Tammy always says the same thing—“Don’t fix what ain’t broke.”
Unfortunately, I may be the one who’s broke if I don’t figure something out.
“Trying to decide what kind of vibe I want in here.”
“Meaning?”
“The stage.” I point at the offending area and let out a deep sigh.
“Ah.” She crosses her arms and pops out her hip. I try hard not to notice how sexy the pose makes her look and keep myself focused on the task at hand. “The stage that’s being used for storage.”
I wish she were wrong, but she’s not. It’s sort of ended up being a “catch all” for oversized boxes and various equipment we don’t need right now, but probably will. “Most of that stuff was cleared out of the apartment in the back. I meant to get rid of it...”
“But there are only so many hours in the day to get everything done.”
“Yep. And I’m honestly not sure if we’ll need any of it. Well, except for the obvious.”
Placing her hands on her hips, Kiersten gets a determined look on her face. “Let’s talk this out then. You’ve mentioned renovations before. W
hat do you want to do?”
That’s the biggest question of them all. “I haven’t really decided. I’d like to cater to a more upscale clientele than we’ve got now.”
Kiersten pokes my arm playfully. “Dwayne isn’t high end enough for you?”
I can’t help it, I laugh. She puts me at ease in a way no one else does. Even just talking through my thoughts so I can process them is much more helpful than she knows.
“Dwayne is like the mascot. He’s not going anywhere.”
“You cemented that fact when you put up that dartboard,” she banters. This is what it’s always like between us—easy conversation and smart quips. I enjoy working with her more than I should.
I enjoy jacking off to thoughts of her more than I should, too. That is a secret that will go with me to the grave.
I run my hand down my face and chuckle. “I did, didn’t I? At least I know we’ll have one regular customer. If I can’t figure out a way to bring a new demographic in here, I may as well leave things as they are. Ideally, I’d like to cater to the sports teams in the area. Jaxon mentioned liking that we’re kind of a hole-in-the-wall type place where he didn’t have to worry about football fans or reporters. That’s why they chose it for the reception. It got me thinking that something like that could be an option.”
“That is a great idea,” she says with no hesitation whatsoever.
“I thought so. If I can figure out how to market to the sports teams in the area. And get this place up to snuff. No use spending the money if we don’t get anything out of it.”
Kiersten scoffs. “That is a terrible thing to say. Do you want to know what I think? What changes could be made to bring in that demographic?”
“Yes, please.” I really mean it. Maybe her perspective will help fix my own. A decorator I am not.
“Follow me,” she says with a wave of her hand.
Like the good boy I am, I do.
“This right here.” Kiersten pats her hand on the railing that encloses the dance floor. “What is the purpose of this?”
“I have no idea. Although most people use it to lean on while they watch others dance. I suppose it’s nice that it’s wide enough to set down your drink.”
