by DD Prince
I grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head, going in slow circles, trying to fuck her right, trying to make her feel good. Kissing her shoulders, nibbling on her neck.
“Good girl,” I lied.
It wasn’t working. Anyone might think she was crying in ecstasy but she was just weeping into the fucking pillow.
I stopped and got up on my knees, straddling her backside.
I gathered her hair into my fist, gently moved it aside and leaned over and kissed her exposed neck. I started massaging her back with my hands, wanting to work out the tension. I didn’t feel any. She was like a ragdoll. Just limp, lying there.
I rolled off to the side but took her with me. She’d stopped trembling, stopped whimpering. She was just red-eyed, limp and broken. And it was my fault. I’d been spending weeks trying to put her back together and now she looked worse than she did before.
I undid her blouse and took it off her. She just laid there while I did this.
I took the bra off and threw it across the room, hating that she was wired. I got her out of her skirt and she was against my side in just her tiny peach thong. I turned the television on and cranked the volume up. Some Asian parade was on and there was music playing. I turned it louder.
I threw the sheet over our heads. It was a cream-colored sheet so the light filtered through and we could see one another.
“What can I do?” I whispered softly into her ear, as softly as I could, hoping she’d hear me over the loud racket.
She shrugged. She wasn’t looking at me. She was looking off into space. Eyes red, cheeks blotchy.
I curled into her, keeping the bedding over our heads, shielding us from them.
She didn’t snuggle in. She didn’t respond at all. She closed her eyes and then she started to sob again.
I held the back of her head, burying her face into my throat.
She didn’t pull away. She let me hold her. She wasn’t holding me back, though, and that was something I felt in my throat like a big fucking lump.
I tried again. I slid my fingers between her legs. She winced. Her entire body winced. I let go.
Space. I’d give her a bit of space.
I watched her, tried to read her expression. She lifted the sheet down so that she could get air, leaving me underneath. As if we were in two different places. Separated.
What to do? What to fucking do? Smoke? Drink? Swim? Sleep?
Take her off this property and the fuck away from Thailand?
My phone made noise.
I reached into my suit pants pocket for it.
A text from Tommy told me they were back home and asked me to check in when I had a chance.
I texted,
“FML.”
He wrote back,
“You ok?”
I replied,
“Not really. Angel really isn’t but I’ll try to fix it. Call you tomorrow. All ok there?”
“All ok here. Sorry to hear that. You’ll fix it. Take care bro. Talk to ya tomorrow.”
I wanted to go work out, take out some frustration. I also wanted to take the pulse of the Kruna partners that were already here. Delgado had knocked on the door while it was happening and asked if he could observe in person. I’d said No. “My wife needs this and I need to be the only one there while she gets what she needs.”
He shook my hand and said he respected that. I had the feeling they were testing me. Things they were doing might’ve been to see if I was putting on an act or being myself.
Now, I needed to know if they would show me a poker face over what’d just happened here. I was good at cards, very good at reading people, and if their opinion of me shifted because of what’d happened in that room or what’d happened in this room, I’d probably see it.
But leaving her alone right now; would that be a good thing for her or a worse thing than the myriad of ways I’d already fucked things up today?
“I’m gonna go speak to them, take the temperature of things. You okay for a few minutes?”
She nodded but her eyes were still lost-looking.
“Want anything?”
She shook her head.
“Back soon.” I kissed her temple, “I’m so sorry,” I whispered into her ear, “Love you very much.”
The grating sound of the loud music on the TV might’ve been bugging her. It was certainly getting to me. I turned the volume down and scrolled until I found cartoons for her. I put the remote beside her and left, taking my keycard and locking the door on my way out.
Tia
The trip home was uneventful, thankfully. Tommy and I dropped Tessa, Sarah, and the boys off at Tessa’s house. Tessa didn’t want to go back to Tom and Lisa’s. She said she needed to feel near to Jim and it was time to get the boys back into their own beds.
Tommy wasn’t so sure but Tessa insisted. He sent security there, with her, and Sarah said she’d bounce back and forth between Tessa’s and Lisa’s. If Tessa wanted her full-time, she’d talk it over with Lisa.
Sarah told me, on the side, she was worried about them both. Lisa and Tess needed one another right now but they hadn’t talked since lunch at Venetia.
Tessa had been quiet, subdued, like me I suppose. Sarah had been chatty, trying to take care of everyone.
I was sick in my heart. For what they’d gone through. For what we’d just gone through. And I never wanted to see Sin City again. The first time there nearly broke me.
This time? This time my heart was in tatters. I had a meltdown and a fight with Tommy. I saw my sister-in-law in a state of shock and utter heartbreak after being kidnapped and raped.
I almost got kidnapped or couldn’t been killed in an explosion that took seven lives. Someone I knew, a mother of six, Katie “Cupcake” Lewis was dead.
I watched my husband kill another man with a bullet to his face. I watched my husband beat up a half-dead monster and then heard that monster get sodomized as I was forced to listen. If Tommy ever tried to take me to Vegas again he'd have to drag me kicking and screaming.
I was relieved to be home. He was preoccupied so he said nothing when I went right up to bed. I didn’t think I’d sleep. I figured I’d watch TV. But as per usual, I fell asleep.
***
A phone was ringing. Tommy’s phone. He answered it and left the room. The room was illuminated by our television’s splash screen. I guess he’d probably come in to our bedroom and when it rang, he left to answer it.
I sat up and glanced at our alarm clock. It was almost midnight and I was starving. I hadn’t had an appetite that day. But right now, my stomach was growling.
I got up and padded down the stairs toward the kitchen and heard him on the phone.
“Slit his fuckin’ throat. Yep. Only wish it could be done again. Really? Right. Did she? Yeah, man. I’ll pick the pup up in the morning. Bye.”
He saw me in the doorway.
“Hey baby girl.”
He looked tired.
“Hi.” I was frozen in place. Slit throat. Did Tommy kill Leo himself?
Dario’s words from after Mexico rang in my head,
“Pop would’ve sent someone to do it for him. But my brother? Tommy will do it himself.”
“Get over here,” he put his phone on the kitchen counter.
I walked into his arms. He inhaled my hair.
“Wrong,” he whispered.
“Hm?”
“When we’re home, you use a different shampoo. When shit’s bad, your hair almost always smells wrong.”
“A sign we shouldn’t leave the house?”
“Maybe. Or you pack your shampoo when we travel.”
“If my hair smells right, things will be right?”
“Wouldn’t that be nice?” He kissed me, “Wanna go take a shower? I’ll wash your hair. Make it smell like home.”
“As nice as that sounds, I came down here for food. I’m starving. Didn’t eat much today. Baby’s hungry.” I patted my belly.
He dropped to his knees and k
issed my stomach and then pressed his forehead against it. I threaded my fingers into his hair.
“I love you,” I said.
Yes, he was someone who would kill but he killed to protect what was his. I was his. He was mine. I felt a burst of affection for him. Of course I still felt dread at what I’d heard but this man? This man was mine. He would keep me safe. I knew it with everything that I was.
“Could’ve been you,” he said.
“Hm?”
“Kate. That could’ve been you. Tess could’ve been you. Kate could’ve been you. Fuck, Tia. My head is fucked over this shit. You could’ve been raped, taken, dead. Some of it. All of it.”
I got to the floor with him and put my arms around him.
“I’m here. I’m okay. You saved me. Like you always do.”
“Johnny and those six kids sure as fuck aren’t okay. Tess isn’t okay.”
“None of this is your fault, honey.” I said.
He shook his head.
“I pushed Leo to this. I insisted he couldn’t be involved in Fete. Shouldn’t have underestimated him. Should’ve fuckin’ taken him out of the equation.”
“No. You can’t go murdering people because they might cause a problem. It’s not your fault what he did. It’s his fault.”
“If I’d taken him out, Tess wouldn’t have gotten raped and stolen from us for a week. If I’d taken him out, Kate would be beside Johnny, there for their kids.”
“You can’t play the ‘what if’ game, Tommy. You can’t play God, either. You can’t stop bad guys from doing bad things.”
“But I can do something. I can do my damndest to make sure nothin’ fuckin’ threatens you or the rest of my family again.”
He got to his feet and walked away, grabbing his phone on the way.
***
I was staring into the refrigerator.
“Find something to eat?”
This was about two hours later. He stopped behind me and peered in.
“Not what I want,” I grumbled.
“What do you want?”
“Arby’s. Beef and cheddar and curly fries.” I glanced over my shoulder at him.
“Still open?”
“I don’t know. Should be.”
“Let’s go for a drive, hit a drive-thru, and then we’ll come back and take a shower?” He looked flirtily into my eyes.
I smiled hesitantly.
“Make your hair smell like it’s supposed to, maybe I’ll be able to sleep.” He took a handful of my hair and pulled me back against him and then he was cupping my boobs, rubbing his groin against me from behind.
“Okay. I’ll just run and get dressed.”
He was in jeans and a black tee and I was in a little pink chemise nightie so I went upstairs, tied my hair up in a ponytail and threw on jeans and a sweater.
***
I drove us to Arby’s and we ate in my Jeep in the parking lot, listening to the radio, not talking. I’d wanted to drive. He made a face but relented. I’d only driven my Jeep a couple times so far. I ate a roast beef and gooey cheese sauce sandwich with loads of Arby’s sauce and horsey sauce. The sandwich was huge, their largest, and I ate the whole thing. I ate all my curly fries, and all but two of Tommy’s curly fries.
He watched me eat his fries, dunking them in the cheese and horsey and Arby’s sauce mess that had fallen out of my sandwich and into my sandwich container, with an amused look on his face but didn’t comment. I tried to feed him one but he raised his hand to decline.
He got out and put our garbage into the trash bin and then he came around to the driver’s side, “I’ll drive us home,” he said.
I didn’t argue. I slurped the end of my juice and climbed over to the passenger side.
We were home a few minutes later and I was yawning as we walked inside.
“We gonna get Marley from Luc’s in the morning?” I asked.
“Yep. I was talking to Ed when you woke up from your nap. I’ll pick him up and drop him off before I go to the office.”
“Good. I miss my puppy.”
“Too full to fuck?” he inquired.
“Noooo,” I said slowly, “Don’t think so. The offer to wash my hair sounds too nice. And I suspect if I take a shower with you, fucking is part of the deal.”
“Damn straight. Better do this,” he mumbled absently as he lifted me up in his arms and headed for the stairs.
“Huh? Why are you carrying me?” I asked.
“Because I can,” he said, matter-of-factly. “And who knows how long that’ll continue, the way you’ve been eating.” He smirked, boyishly, teasingly.
I smacked his arm, “Not funny.”
He ascended the stairs, “It’s a little funny.”
It was good to see him be playful with all that weighed on him right now. Stuff weighed on me, too, but I would do my best to give him what he needed, whether it was sex, levity, or letting him wash my hair so that it smelled like my oatmeal and honey shampoo, which he seemed to really like.
In the bathroom, the comedy vanished. When he stripped me, he was looking very serious. I had a feeling I was getting Dominator Tommy here, not Ice Cream Parlor Tommy.
Once I was naked, I stripped him, kissing my way down his chest to his jeans, undoing his zipper between my teeth, and then I kissed him on the pelvis right above the root of his cock.
Instead of the badass or the sweetheart, I got Mexico Tommy, the nurturer, who was determined to take care of me like he did when he rescued me from the side of the road in Mexico in the middle of the night.
He hauled me up by my armpits and his jeans pooled at his feet. He stepped out and pulled us toward the shower. Immediately, his hands were in my hair, his lips on mine, and then my back was against the tiled wall. It was cold so I jolted and my nipples went hard as my flesh broke out in goosebumps.
“Naw. Bath,” he said and we moved to the tub and he twisted the taps and we climbed in.
He ran us a bath instead of starting the shower.
Tommy
She’s told me I’ve got both light and darkness in me. And I’m a lucky fuck because she gets off on both. But right now I’m trying, like fuck, to let her see only the light. Stopping the darkness from engulfing me is proving to be a challenge.
I need to let out enough of the dark to get shit done but keep it on a tight leash so I don’t hurt her. She likes that dark sometimes but it isn’t good for her, especially while she’s pregnant.
I can’t stop thinking about Johnny and Kate. I can’t get my mind off that motherfucker putting his hands on Tessa. I’m thinkin’ about my brother stuck in a sex slave resort trying to pretend to be friends with men who raped and beat his wife for two years.
Things are absolutely fucked right now.
But I can’t shake the fear that if I’m not careful, I’ll ruin Tia. I showed her, last night, who I will be if I need to be. Tonight, I have to show her how much she means to me, so that she’ll know that even if I gotta wear that black hat sometimes, she’s got me. The me that loves her more than anything.
I soaped up her hair and then her body, taking my sweet time, stoking a fire with my touch and she looked like she was enjoying it. I got myself soaped up quickly and then rinsed and pulled the plug and carried her to bed. The lights were out but the hall light was on, our door opened, and our curtains were wide open with light coming in from the outside lights, so I could make her out easily in the dark.
I ran my hand from her ankle to her hip, taking in her soft skin. Her hips were becoming slightly more rounded. Her belly wasn’t showing like she was pregnant but it wasn’t concave any longer. She was curvier. Her tits were fuller, more beautiful. Even in the dark I could see that her eyes were shining, looking at me with love, with trust. That I hadn’t lost that look with what’d happened last night meant a fuckuva lot.
She wound her wet hair up and flicked it back over the top of the pillow her head was on. I put my mouth to her left nipple and sucked, making her back arch.
/>
She grabbed the headboard with both hands. I lightly ran my hands from her wrists down to her armpits and then my hands found her hips. I lavishly licked between her thighs, twirling my tongue around her clit. Her legs wrapped around my back. My touch went from light to greedy. I yanked her legs up over my shoulders.
“Love you, baby girl.”
“Love you so much, Tommy.”
I hungrily went after her pussy with my mouth. She felt like heaven, wrapped tight around my tongue, legs draped over my shoulders like this.
“Don’t ever doubt how much you mean to me,” I told her, and then moved up her body. She had been just about to come when I said that. She took a steadying breath and gripped the rails over the bed harder.
I positioned my cock, ready to slide in, “Yeah?”
“Mmm. Give it to me, yeah.”
I pushed inside, my head rolling back, feeling how wet and tight she was. Her body was out in goosebumps. I ran my hands up and down her legs, her torso, grabbing her tits. She attacked my mouth with hers, letting go of the bed rails to grab my head with both hands.
“You’re mine,” I said, fiercely.
She nodded enthusiastically, a gasp escaping her lips.
“Tell me.”
“Yours,” she breathed and put her hand between us to rub her own clit.
I pushed her hand away. That was my job.
“You wanna come?”
“Yeah.”
I pinned her arms with both hands. She grunted and squeezed my cock with her pussy.
I reared back and rammed deep, rotating my hips, fucking her hard.
“Tommy, please,” she tried to wrestle her arms free.
“Who’s in charge?” I asked.
She blew out a breath, “You. Please. I need to come.”
“You come when I let you come.”
“Hurry! You’re torturing me. I need you.”
I couldn’t deny her. I put my hand to her clit and fucked her hard.
“Come with me, baby…” she pleaded while I kept playing with it until she came, hard, calling out my name.
