by Karen Ruth
“Can you hear the pack's thoughts?” I asked Rafiq. He gave me a small nod assuring me that he indeed could.
“Why hasn’t anyone told me about this before?”
“We were told not to by Seth,” he responded.
“Why?” I asked.
“He didn’t want to overwhelm you and he wanted to make you feel like you were a part of the group.”
I looked Rafiq in the face. He wasn’t looking at me, his eyes were staring blankly in front of him. I didn’t believe what he was saying, it felt as though he was lying to me. I didn’t question him further, I just stopped talking and kept moving forward.
Finally, we made it back to my house. Rafiq said his goodbye and started walking back into the woods. The one good thing about my house is the location. It is located right next to the woods, in case there is an emergency and I need to transform, it's right there. From everything that happened today, I forgot about asking Seth about telling my family. My heart sank as I came to this realization. I’d have to talk to him about it tomorrow. As of right now, I think we all need to just rest and forget about what happened.
I try so hard to not be the bad person my mom thinks I am. Today, was not something she would be proud of. I can’t be that person, the one who goes around messing with other people’s things and doing bad acts. I can’t be caught being a part of a group that wants to take over someone else’s property. I can’t be a part of a group that wants to attack others for no reason at all. That’s not me and I refuse to stoop to that level. Maybe Lucas was right? Maybe I really don’t belong in that group. The biggest thing I couldn’t believe was how Rafiq was such a different person than I knew him to be. Before he would never lie to me, but today, that is the impression I got. Maybe we weren’t so close after all?
Slowly, I grabbed the metal door handle, propping it open ever so slowly. Scared about what could happen. Most people fear death, clowns, or small enclosures. I have none of these fears. The two fears I possess are isolation and the loss of someone close to me. I can’t have my family turning away from me. I need them in ways they don’t understand. The door creaked open, and I felt the breeze from the ceiling fan above. The lights were off as I made my descent into the kitchen. My mom was there lost in her own thought as she swept. She looked so sad, probably all my fault from earlier. Ever so quietly I walked up to her and said in a small shaky tone,
“Mom? I’m so sorry please forgive me?”
She looked up as a tear fell from her dark blue eyes.
“Oh Nina, I didn’t mean what I said. I thought you ran away and I lost you forever. I’m so sorry my baby girl.” She said as she rushed towards me throwing the broom down and taking me in a hug.
“No mother, it is I who should apologize. I promise I’ll stay away from them. You’re right, they are bad people.”
“Oh Nina, I love you so much!” Exclaimed my mother.
“I love you too momma!” I said back to her.
As we were hugging my darling older sister walked into the room and said in her sweet tone, “I’m so happy you two made up!” She squealed and joined us in an embrace.
Hours later, after washing dishes and helping around the house with chores, I went to the attic to lay in my bed. All the thoughts of the day just spinning around in my head. It was approximately midnight and it was a full moon. The moon casting its illuminating light through the small circular window. My wolf edging to come out and play. After all the excitement today, I was tired and didn’t want to let my wolf out. I knew my pack would be out running around but honestly, I didn’t want to be with them, especially right now. I wanted to be faithful to my mom and try to avoid them. I had so many questions about the day that I needed answers to. I knew that it would be impossible to sleep with all of these thoughts floating around in my head. So, for this reason, I began to search my room. I began to look through as many old boxes as I could find to see if there was any information about my father. There had to be some picture somewhere giving me hints about this life from before. Maybe he even wrote a letter describing to me what happened.
Boxes after boxes I found with no such luck. I couldn’t find anything. There were pictures of him in the boxes but nothing I got any hints from. He seemed so normal like there wasn’t any wolf to him at all. In all honesty, I’m not even sure how he passed away. My mom refuses to talk about it, but she did confirm that he is dead. In the boxes, there was no letter addressed to me about this life, absolutely nothing. This drove me insane. I’m the type of girl who needs answers and if I don’t get any, I will go out of my own way to find some. Looking at one of the pictures with my mom and dad hand in hand, I stuffed it into my pocket for safekeeping. Then the idea popped into my head, it was a little crazy. Lucas said if I needed any questions, just ask him. Will he really be able to hear me? Am I crazy for even thinking it will work?
“Well Nina, it doesn’t hurt to try does it?” I said out loud to myself, feeling a little weird and anxious like I was insane.
“Well here goes nothing,” I said. “Lucas?” I said aloud. I waited a few minutes with no sound, just dead eerie silence. “Hmm, ok, well that didn’t work,” I thought. I began to get frustrated. Why can’t a girl just get some answers? “Lucas!” I yelled inside my mind. Next thing I knew a response came.
“Dang Nina no need to yell. You’re going to break my ears. What do you need?”
I jumped back surprised that he actually heard me and responded. “That actually worked?” I thought.
“Of course it worked,” he laughed and said. “I told you it would, what don’t you trust me?” He said faking being hurt.
“No offense dude but I just met you, you can’t expect me to trust you already,” I responded.
“Smart girl, now what do you need?”
“What did you mean by the whole white means alpha thing?”
“Ahh, I knew that would spark your interest,” Lucas said.
“So, you purposely tried to drive me insane, well it worked. Now, what’s the answer?”
“Not so fast,” Lucas said. “I’ll tell you in due time. Come meet me in the woods and I’ll explain what I meant.”
“How do I know I can trust you?” I asked surprised that he thinks I could just trust him to not to do anything if I came all alone.
“Think Nina, can’t you feel it in your heart? Can’t you feel that you can trust me?” Lucas said earnestly.
I thought to myself and let my feelings flow through. Somehow deep inside me, I knew I could trust him, I just couldn’t explain how.
“Hmm ok,” I said. “Where at in the woods?”
Lucas went quiet for one minute before responding “meet me where we met earlier in one hour. “I’ll be waiting for you. Stay safe Nina, if you need anything remember just call my name. And this time could you please not scream it?”
I laughed at this. “I’m sorry Lucas, I won’t scream it, I promise.”
“Good, I’ll see you soon dear sweet Nina.” Then our connection was severed and he left me alone thinking about everything we just said.
To make it in one hour, I was going to have to transform into my wolf. I couldn’t just walk there and hope to make it in time. Besides, she is going to be really happy that I set her free to run on the full moon. I slowly left my room and ever so quietly descended the staircase. I had to be quiet, I couldn’t afford to wake either Catherine or my mom up. They would just assume that I was going out to do bad things once more. Sneaking past their room I made it to the door and successfully opened it without being caught. The night breeze flowed through the air making my hair blow off my shoulders. It felt so nice and I closed my eyes to take in the sweet smell of night. I walked into the woods, took my clothes off, and stuck them in a hole where nobody would find them. Then I transformed and set my wolf free.
I ran through the brambles feeling the night air on my face. Feeling of happiness over road me. The full moon elevates all of our senses and emotions making us sense and feel things m
ore deeply. I ran as fast as I could jumping over fallen trees and other obstacles. Since I’m more slender than other werewolves, I’m faster than most of them as well. I have yet to find a werewolf who can actually beat me in a race. I arrived at my destination in minutes, nowhere near the hour when I was supposed to meet up with Lucas. Expecting to have to wait the rest of the time for him to show up, I laid down and waited for him to arrive. I closed my eyes and wrapped my tail around my body. Just taking in everything the night had to offer.
A noise came from behind the tree startling me, causing me to jump. How could I have been so foolish as to not use my senses to see if anyone was here and if it was safe? I got into my defense stance.
“Relax Nina,” a voice said.
It was then that I realized that it was Lucas who was behind the tree.
“You startled me, what are you doing here so early?” I asked.
Lucas came out from behind the tree in his wolf form. “I could ask you the same question,” he said flashing me his wolf smile.
“You got here first, so you have to answer first,” I said.
“That doesn’t make much sense but ok, I’ll answer. I just assumed you would get here early, you don’t seem like the very patient kind.” He was still smiling as he said that and it made me laugh.
“If only you knew,” I responded.
“So, what about the whole white thing?” I prompted Lucas for the answer.
“Calm Nina, I’ll tell you soon. Here, come follow me, I have something to show you.”
“Show me what?” I said confused.
“A place I bet you have never been before.” This sparked my interest making me follow Lucas.
“If you break my trust you’re in trouble,” I said looking directly at him.
“Trust me I wouldn’t ever want to break your trust, now come.” He said as I followed him deeper into the woods.
“So, tell me about yourself,” I said to Lucas not knowing what to say.
He looked at me his golden eyes glowing in the dark.
“What do you want to know?” He asked.
“Anything really, when did you become who you are? Were you bitten or were you born this way?”
“Those are quite personal questions Nina, not everyone would be so keen on you asking that stuff.” Lucas implied.
My face grew to a bright red color.
“Sorry, you don’t have to answer that. I didn’t mean to intrude.”
Lucas flashed a smile at me. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t bother me. I was born like this, a werewolf. Both of my parents are. I come from a long line of werewolves to be exact.”
“Lucky,” I said jealous that he grew up knowing what he was. “My mom is completely normal and my father passed away when I was young. I have no idea whether he was a werewolf or not. I assume he was based on the fact that I was never bitten, so there isn’t any way I got it that way.”
“I’m sorry Nina,” Lucas said looking sincere. “If you think of it in a positive way you at least got to be normal for part of your life. I myself have always had the werewolf responsibility far greater than you can comprehend right now. That is why I am taking you to this place. So you can get a real understanding about werewolves and the royal court.”
“Wait,” I said. “That is actually a thing? I thought you were just kidding or something.” I looked at him my eyes getting wider.
“Yes, it’s a thing, why would I kid about something like that? We take the royal court oath very seriously.” Lucas said confused that I would think something negative about it.
“Sorry, I guess I honestly don’t know pretty much anything about werewolves. The only things I know are from Seth and he never said anything about it.”
“I never would expect him to,” huffed Lucas. “You should stay away from that man he’s really bad news.” “
Do you two have a history together?” I said looking him straight in the eyes.
“Yes, but let’s not talk about that right now Nina. We better hurry or we’re going to be late.” Said Lucas.
“Late for what?”
“You’ll see,” Lucas said as he waved his long black tail at me telling me to walk faster.
I came to an abrupt stop. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Standing in the distance was a huge castle. Lucas looked behind him and gave me a questioning look.
“Are you ok Nina?” He asked with worry on his face.
I responded, “What is THAT?” Flashing my tail in the direction of the castle.
“Uh that’s where I’m taking you and that is where I live,” he said.
“You live there?!?” I exclaimed, “How can someone live in a place like that!”
This caused Lucas to laugh. "You really don’t know who I am do you?" The look on my face answered away making him laugh further.
“Come on Nina, I’ll explain when we arrive inside.”
“I can’t go in there! I don’t even have clothes to change back into my human self! Forget that, I don’t even have clothes in my entire wardrobe that is fancy enough for a place like that!” I exclaimed panicking that he really wanted me to go into a place that fancy especially not even dressed up for it.
“Relax Nina,” Lucas said laughing still. “People will find you something to wear.”
“People?! How many people live there?!"
“Hmm honestly, I don’t even know, now come on.”
Panic struck me to the core. I really didn’t want to go into a place like that. I felt like bolting, but I assume Lucas already knew that from the way he keeps flashing his eyes back at me making sure I don’t leave. Could this type of place really exist, and how did I not even notice it before? I mean it’s not very hard to spot a building of that size. Well, scratch that, it isn’t even a building more like several buildings put together to make one. I bet one room in that entire place is bigger than my entire house. Probably even the bathroom is bigger. Thinking this caused me to let out a panicked laugh causing Lucas to look back at me thinking I lost my mind. Maybe I had.
“Nina, get yourself together,” I thought to myself.
It isn’t that big of a deal. I’m sure it’s full of werewolves who are quite understanding. That was not the right thing to think of. It made me even more nervous. My entire life I have never been around that many werewolves. The only werewolves I really know consist of my pack, and well now Lucas. What if they think that I’m an abomination?
Walking up to the gate that surrounded the building, I began to tremble. It was locked and the only way to get in was to scan your body. Since Lucas lives here he knew exactly what to do. He approached the gate and the scanner scanned the length of his body. The big gate door opened letting us inside. I was awestruck by this process. My mouth hung open in complete astonishment. Lucas obviously noticed the expression on my face because he flashed me a smile. Embarrassed, I closed my mouth and began walking once more. Once we both passed through, the gate closed back to its original position.
Once passing the gate, I finally got a good look at what the castle looked like. It was huge, bigger than any building I’ve ever seen. Something that comes straight out of a fairy tale. It was a crimson and white color that had a symbol on the top of it. It was a symbol of a wolf howling with a full moon behind it. Lights illuminated the pathway to the main door of the building, or at least I assumed it was the main door. Heck, I didn’t even know if it was the main building or not. I followed Lucas up to the door as it opened all by itself.
“How did it do that?” I asked him in dismay.
“You don’t think that we would force you to change back into a human just to open the doors, do you?” Lucas questioned me.
It was a fair enough point but I wasn’t going to give him the victory. I then did the only tactic I could think of. I stuck my wolf tongue out at him. It caused a rumble of laughter to erupt inside of him.
“very mature Nina, he rumbled.”
I flashed him a smile and walked into the building alongside him.<
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The ceiling was huge, at least 20 feet tall. Antique chandeliers hung from them, lighting the building up. The walls were a grey color, making it look old-fashioned. I followed Lucas through the building. There were too many doors, I had no idea where to go. It would take me ages to figure out which door led to which room. How could someone live in a place this big? It was big enough for a whole town to live here.
Coming across a room with a diamond handled door, Lucas flicked his tail at me and said,
“Ok Nina, you can stay here and get dressed. I’ll change as well and meet you outside your room.”
As he said this, a group of people showed up with clothes in their hands. They were carrying dresses of different sizes. Was I really expected to wear that?
“Promise me you’ll be here when I’m done?” I asked Lucas worried that he would leave me stranded in a place of this size.
“Of course, dear sweet Nina. Why would I leave you?”
After this response, Lucas padded away from me descending the long hall, covered with crimson carpet, making his way to what I assumed was his room.
The group of women opened the door for me and I padded in. Awe-struck me. The place was beautiful. I have never seen anything quite like it. Forget being a room, this place was bigger than my entire house. I ached to explore, my curiosity kicking in, but then I remembered that these women are here for me and I didn’t want to keep them waiting. It was weird having them here for me. I didn’t need a clothes dresser, nor did I want one. I am quite independent and I never like having people help me. I preferably do everything by myself, especially get changed.
One of the women, around the age of 50, put a towel on my back. For that, I was very grateful. I was shy about the way my human body looked. Always insecure thinking that I was ugly. I’ve had people tell me otherwise before, but I have just never believed them. Especially everything that has happened amongst my pack. They have weaned down my already insecure self, but I would never tell them that.
I walked into the ginormous bathroom and transformed back into my human counterpart. I wrapped the towel around my body to cover myself up and walked back into the bedroom where they were waiting for me.
