by Emma Vikes
“That’s unlikely, Wang. Like Everett, I’m not looking to date.”
“Is that a requirement to be a forensic scientist in our department?” Wang asked, mockingly.
Alexa smirked but focused her gaze on her computer so that neither of us could see her eyes. “Maybe it just means that we’re two people who prioritize entirely different things in life and having a relationship simply doesn’t fit into our timeframes.”
Her answer made me look at her, but she was still busy working on something on her computer. Her words rang true but why did the truth have to pierce my heart? Wang shook his head and then jumped off her desk. “Well, I’d better go. Your refusal to date might be contagious and the last thing I want is to do is catch it.”
Just as he was about to open the door, it swung open, revealing Olivia who had a sheepish grin on her face. Alexa jumped out of her seat when she saw her friend. “Liv? What are you doing here?”
Olivia waved at me slightly as she gave Alexa a hug; Wang lingered by the door, staring at Olivia before moving to my desk and whispering, “Maybe I should stay for a little while.”
I shook my head and gave him a jab in the stomach. “The last thing you want to do is break Alexa’s best friend’s heart. If you want to stay in Alexa’s good side, you’d better not.”
Wang pouted and then placed a hand on his heart, feigning hurt. “You wound me, Hudson.”
The girls seemed oblivious to the conversation I was having with Wang. Olivia looked like she was desperately trying to get Alexa to agree to something. “Lexi, please! Wayne said that his friend is a really good guy! It’s just one date! Please!”
Alexa looked at her friend in complete disbelief. “You want me to go on a blind-date with your new boyfriend’s roommate? For what?”
“Well, Wayne said that his roommate just got off a relationship and it would be a welcome distraction for the guy. He asked me last night if I had any friend who’s single and of course I thought of you! He’s nice, Lexi. I swear on our friendship that he’s not a douche.” I could hear Olivia literally begging Alexa to agree. A part of me hoped that she wouldn’t.
Wang whistled beside me, making his presence known again. “I don’t want to butt in but Alexa here just told me she’s not looking to date so I don’t really think you can convince her.”
Olivia looked at Wang, rolled her eyes, then completely ignored him. “Lexi, please. Just one date! Just one! And I promise, if you don’t like him or it doesn’t turn out nice, then I won’t let him bother you ever again even if he pesters me.”
Before Alexa could reply, there was a knock on the door and one of the interns popped in. “Vehicular accident near boulevard. Police has requested CSI since they couldn’t figure out where it all went wrong. Survivor believes there’s been a foul play.”
Alexa and I glanced at each other and without a word, began to pack our things. Olivia followed Alexa around, begging her friend to say yes before she left for the case, but Alexa wasn’t having any of it. But she finally sighed and looked at Olivia. “Liv, let me think about it, okay? You know I’m not the biggest fan of dating and you know why. You’ve hooked me up with so many guys when we were in high school and most of them ran in the other direction.”
“I just want you to agree on one date, Lexi. It’s not like I’m asking you to marry the guy!”
“She has a point,” Wang piped up and both Alexa and I turned to glare at him to shut up. He cowered but chuckled and followed me out of the room.
But as we slipped out, I didn’t get to hear Alexa’s reply. Not that I needed to. Not that I wanted to. I chewed on my bottom lip and tapped my feet incessantly against the solid floor. Wang was right in front of me and crossed his arms, amusement clear in his dark eyes. “I caught that; you know.”
I looked at Wang, suddenly alert. Did he notice the sudden tension that I felt as I listened to Olivia try to convince Alexa to say yes on the date? “Caught what?”
Wang shrugged nonchalantly. “The way you and Alexa shared a look the moment the intern said you were both needed. You weren’t on board with the whole new scientist thing but look at you now, Hudson. It’s like you and Alexa are a well-oiled machine together. I have to admit, I’m kind of jealous because that used to be us.”
I smirked. “Until you started slacking on the job and was transferred to Detective Shepherd’s team?”
Wang narrowed his eyes and glared at me and he left, grumbling, while I continued to wait until Alexa and Olivia got out of the office. Olivia looked sullen so I took it as a sign of Alexa not agreeing with her. She waved goodbye once we reached the lobby. Then Alexa and I got into the car to get to the scene of the crime.
“So did you agree to go on the date that Olivia wanted you to go on?” I asked, trying to sound casual, trying to hide the tone in my voice when I asked the question.
Alexa looked at me with her head tilted to one side, her eyes narrowed into slits. “Why are you asking?”
I let out a shaky exhale and then shrugged. “Nothing. It’s just that, your friend doesn’t seem to be really good when it comes to choosing guys. I mean, I can only hope that the one she’s with now is decent but what if the one she’s with is decent and the roommate isn’t?”
She raised an eyebrow and let out an amused chuckle. “You sound like you’re generalizing your species.”
“I’m not!” I replied defensively and sat up straighter. “I just want to make sure that you don’t end up like your best friend. We’ve had this conversation before, haven’t we?”
Alexa pursed her lips and nodded her head. “We did. And if you really want to know, I didn’t agree, Ev. Like I told Wang, I’m not looking to date.”
Suddenly it felt as if something heavy had been lifted off my chest, and I could breathe in relief. Alexa shook her head in amusement. “You came back from your date early.”
I shrugged. “It’s not like it was a date. Tessie wanted to catch up and like I said, I was needed at the institute. I also wanted to hear her opinion regarding the research that we’d been working on. I guess she didn’t appreciate that we spent too much time there.”
Alexa shook her head. “At this rate, Ev, you’re never going to find someone to marry.”
I wasn’t sure why she had made that comment. But something about it made my heart clench lightly and a part of me wanted to tell her that I wasn’t looking for someone to marry, because it felt like I had already found her.
But why would I say that to her when there wasn’t any girl that made my heart flutter?
Except for her.
I tilted my head to the side, looking at her carefully. “Maybe I already found her.”
Alexa sucked in a breath and turned away. I knew my words had affected her and I looked away, knowing that I shouldn’t have said that. But I couldn’t help myself. I let out a shaky breath and mentally chided myself for being so reckless.
We have other priorities.
Despite the tension that had filled us after what I had just said, when we arrived at the scene, Alexa and I worked like professionals. By the time we’d finished bagging the items, Alexa had to go to the morgue to get more evidence from Dr. Webber. I wanted to go with her since I was also part of the case, but Alexa was more knowledgeable in that area than I was, so we went our separate ways.
I scanned every piece of evidence that I thought might help us decide if there was any foul play in the event of the accident. The rest of the afternoon was spent quietly working at the lab. The paperwork that needed to be done was a welcome distraction from how the events of the day as well as the previous night.
I fell asleep beside her, my arms wrapped tight around her and hers around mine. Her head was resting on my chest and I could hear her even breaths, when I opened my eyes. But the sun hadn’t even come up yet and there wasn’t a sliver of sunlight that flooded the room. The clock read 4 AM.
You can have me until dawn, no lines drawn.
I had her until this moment and all
I wanted was to wrap my arms around her just a little tighter, because I already missed her even though she was right beside me. The sheer magnitude of what I felt for her was unexplainable even to someone like me and I couldn’t grasp the notion of it all.
But if there was one thing I knew, it was this:
We had different priorities and it didn’t matter what I felt.
I dropped the pen loudly on my desk and let out a big sigh. No matter how much I tried to throw myself into work, there was no denying the amount of time that I’d spent glancing at the door hoping Alexa would come in. I’d tried to condition myself this morning but when I went to the café, I couldn’t help but order her coffee too. It felt normal to me and I guess it was. I mean, it wasn’t as if I meant any harm, right?
That did it. I was going to pick her up from the morgue and then we could have dinner, as friends, as colleagues. There wasn’t any harm in that, right?
I packed my things quickly, the excitement of seeing Alexa again after not having seen her for a few hours left me in a good mood. I left the department and hailed a cab to get me to the morgue, but as I waiting I saw a flower shop across the street, so I got her a bouquet of fresh peonies. She had been a little on edge earlier because of Olivia, and I had messed up with our conversation in the car too, so I wanted to cheer her up a little.
When I arrived at the morgue, I called her. She answered on the fourth ring. “Hello, Everett?”
“Hey, Lexi. Are you done with Dr. Webber?”
Her voice sounded distant and I could hear Dr. Webber performing the autopsy in the background. “Almost. Why?”
“I’m outside. I’ll wait for you.”
There was a long pause on the other line and then I listened as Alexa took a deep breath and exhaled a shaky one. “Why?”
For a moment, I wondered what she meant by that, what the deep breath and shaky exhale meant. For a moment, I wondered if I should tell her that I had been missing her when she had been gone, but then decided against doing so. “There’s a new seafood diner that opened downtown. Want to have dinner?”
Again, there was a long pause. “I’m kind of tired, Ev…”
I bit my lower lip. “Oh. I guess I’ll just see you at home, then? Or I’ll wait till you get out, Lexi.”
I sat on the steps and waited until Alexa came out, unsure of why I had decided to do this in the first place. The whole seafood diner thing had been a last-minute idea that had come to my mind. All I knew was that I wanted to see her, the desire too strong to restrain myself from doing so. It was like I was missing a part of me when I wasn’t with her.
I heard the door open and I abruptly stood up, almost ruining the peonies that I had brought with me. Unconsciously, I straightened my clothes and fixed my hair. Alexa stepped out and I stood there, dumbstruck as I watched her. The wind blew her red hair, and the strands that slipped out of her messy ponytail flew back. Sunlight hit her hazel eyes making it look like glistening gold. All I could think about was…
My god, she looked beautiful.
And like a bolt of lightning, it suddenly came to me again. The reason I felt like this.
I understood the sheer magnitude of the overwhelming emotions that I felt each time Alexa came into the room. She was the bright light that filled up the darkness that I’d been living in for years. She flooded every inch of my life with sunlight.
All along I’d tried to deny it and shove down the feelings that I had. I thought that maybe I just liked her, given all the time I’d spent with her. But missing her like crazy even when we had only spent a few hours apart, constantly thinking about her, and wondering what she was doing; she was the bright light that made me reconsider all the decisions that I’d made in my life and made me want to live for a different future.
A future with her in it.
Because my god, was this what love felt like?
19
Everett
I stood right in front of her, like the dumbstruck fool that I was, suddenly in awe of how pretty Alexa really was. I’d seen her when she was a little stressed with work, when she was wearing comfortable clothes to lounge around in her apartment, when she was in a beautiful dress that accentuated every curve of her body, when she was lying beneath me, her eyes rolled back in pleasure as I pushed myself inside of her, when she was fast asleep and snoring lightly. But no matter how many versions of her I’d seen, all of them still left me awestruck.
And only Alexa Stone rendered me dumbstruck.
“Everett?” Her voice sounded faraway, distant, but I snapped back into reality once I heard it. “What are you doing here?”
Her hazel eyes held a quiet curiosity that I knew she was trying hard not to show. She didn’t want to ask me for reasons. I shrugged and then awkwardly handed her the flowers that were in my hand.
I bit my lower lip and shrugged. “I wanted to pick you up. You sure you’re not up for dinner?”
Alexa smiled at me faintly. “I’m fine, Ev. I just want to change into some comfortable clothes and slip into my blankets and watch Netflix.”
I pursed my lips and wasn’t sure what I was meant to do now. The awkward tension was evident and Alexa just stood there in front of me, the flowers in her hands. She moved them closer to her and took a sniff and a ghost of a smile spread on her lips which made my heart flutter again. “Thank you for these, by the way.”
Smiling, I shrugged. “I saw them at the flower shop and they were so pretty. I wanted to give them to you.”
“Did it occur to you that I might be allergic to pollens?”
My eyes widened and I quickly reached out to snatch the flowers out of her hands, but she held them back, turning away slightly from me. She laughed and shook her head. Her smile was brighter this time, the side of her eyes crinkling in delight as I tried to reach for the flowers again, my attempts failing as she dodged me each time.
Alexa cocked her head to the side, her eyes glinting with mischief. “You know for such a fit guy, you’re not that agile.”
I frowned. “And for someone who’s apparently allergic to pollens, you really should stop clinging to those flowers, Alexa.”
But Alexa made no move to give them back to me and she just shook her head and sniffed them again. My eyes widened, my heart racing in fear at the allergic reaction that was bound to happen. “I just asked you if it occurred to you that I might be allergic, I never really said that I was. You should pay more attention to sentences, Ev.”
I let out a shaky breath and glared at her. I reached for her hand instead and laced them in mine and she didn’t make a move to pull her hand away. “Should we head to yours now?”
It took Alexa a short while to respond, her eyes glued to our joined hands, and then she nodded her head, her beaming smile faltering slightly as I hailed a cab for the both of us. We settled in the backseat of the cab and I gave Alexa’s address and she rested her head on my shoulder. Neither of us said anything and I turned my head slightly and inhaled her intoxicating scent, my eyes fluttering close, my heart racing just a little bit faster.
God, I could have this for the rest of my life if I tried.
“How was the autopsy?”
Something flickered in Alexa’s eyes and she inched away from me a little. “There was no hint of foul play in the victim’s body. But god, poor lady. She was just 23 and had her whole life ahead of her. You know that’s the main thing that I hate about our job.”
I smiled at her sadly, nodding my head in complete understanding. “We see dead people a lot, some of them who died too soon.”
Alexa sighed and then leaned her head on the backrest and closed her eyes. “I wanted to be a doctor when I was younger.”
My eyebrows raised in surprise. There were moments when we were at work and had nothing better to do than talk and Alexa would randomly spout things about herself that just came to her mind. “What made you change your mind?”
She shrugged. “It took too long to become one and my family needed help. Dr. St
evenson, the pathologist back home, offered to let me intern at her laboratory on weekends, when I was still in college, and after I graduated, she absorbed me as one of the scientists. The pay wasn’t too good but god, seeing Dr. Stevenson in action was something else and I couldn’t help but imagine myself in her shoes.”
Alexa still had her eyes closed as she told me all of this, and I couldn’t help but let my gaze linger on her features. Her slightly crooked nose, her long lashes that seemed to kiss her porcelain skin, the small mole on the right corner of her lips, freckles that dusted her face which she always hid with makeup but always showed up at the end of the day because she couldn’t be bothered with retouches.
“What kind of doctor would you have been if you were given the chance?”
“I wanted to be a paediatrician,” she answered without missing a beat, “a developmental paediatrician, to be precise. I wanted to help those like Aaron, since I’d had experience taking care of him. But aside from the fact that it took too long, there wasn’t any scholarship being offered for that program.”
“You really love your brother, don’t you?”
“I’d give him the world if I could,” and then she opened her eyes and looked at me. I understood what she wanted to tell me, how important her brother was to her, no matter what happened.
The cab stopped in front of her building and I paid our fare and then we walked up to her unit. I ordered pizza for the both of us while she changed and I made myself comfortable on her loveseat as I scanned her laptop for a decent anime show to watch on Netflix.
“You’re here a little too much. Look at you, all comfortable on your own,” Alexa commented and I swallowed at the sight of her. She was wearing short shorts and a tank top. Her red hair was tied up in a bun on the top of her head and she was wearing her glasses again.
