Alix sat up again, twisting in her seat to look behind them. She turned to Zack with wide eyes. her face pale.
“I just killed someone,” she said quietly.
“You were helping me,” he said in a tight voice. “That doesn’t count.”
Alix leaned back in her seat, covering her mouth with one hand, staring through the windshield into space. Zack knew she was deeply shaken by what she had been forced to do, but he didn’t know how he could make her understand that it was necessary.
He winced as he took the wheel with his left hand so he could reach out to her with his right. He touched her forearm, then slid his hand down to hers, holding it loosely. Alix, startled, looked over to him, then down to their joined hands.
She didn’t pull away.
7
Alix
At some point in the night, Alix had fallen asleep. She woke up with a start as Zack stopped the car, momentarily confused. It was daylight, but only barely; everything outside her window was covered in white. The sunlight was weak, giving the day a cold gray cast. There was nothing around them but forest. Just in front of him, she could make out the outline of a wooden shack. And Zack was gone.
She sat up quickly. “Zack!”
The rear hatch lifted, and a cold blast of wind blasted through the truck. “I’m right here,” he said as he grabbed a couple of coats. “Honey, we’re home.”
He closed the hatch and walked around to her side to open her door. Alix jumped down and immediately sank to her shins in the snow. Zack hurried to help her into a heavy fleece coat. White flakes lazily drifted from the shadowy skies. Snow lay like a blanket over the ground, frosting the tips of the trees. Everything felt peaceful. Silent. She had only heard Brady’s stories about snow, never experienced it for herself, but it was more beautiful than she ever could have imagined.
“Where are we?” she asked.
“Maine,” Zack said as he trudged through the snow, creating a path for Alix to follow. “I don’t think anyone will track us here.”
Alix clumsily tried to keep her balance as she followed Zack’s path to the cabin porch. “What happened back there?”
Zack said nothing and sniffed from the cold as he unlocked the cabin door. It opened with a loud squeak. He stepped to the side so Alix could enter first. The cabin was basically a small, square box. There was a bed in one corner and a countertop with a sink along the wall across from it. In the other corner was a table and a few chairs. Beside it was a couch that faced a large brick fireplace. Dust floated in the air, catching in the spiderwebs that hung like lace from the sheets covering the furniture.
Alix turned back to Zack as he closed the door. The coldness inside the cabin was worse than outside.
“We need to get a fire started,” Zack said as he tossed a couple of split logs into the firebox. He found a box of matches on the mantel and knelt to kindle the flames. Alix coughed from the dust and started pulling the sheets down. She was fully aware that he was trying to distract her from her question. It really didn’t matter anyway; the most obvious answer was that Vardok had sent his mercenaries to find her and take her back. What she didn’t understand was why he was using humans to do his dirty work. Did he have that much reach into this world? Brady had always told her that in the human world, if you offer enough money, you could get anything you wanted. Including abduction, apparently.
She said very little as she and Zack carried in the supplies and bags and went about making the cabin habitable. They worked through the afternoon, dusting and sweeping and clearing out cobwebs. He didn’t say much, either. Alix couldn’t tell if he was upset or just being quiet.
When they finished, Zack dumped a can of soup into a small pot and heated it over the camp stove on the counter. Alix sat at the table, fiddling with a bottle of water as she watched him rinse out a couple of bowls and spoons. He favored his left arm slightly. His shirt was torn and bloody in the back where the bullet had passed through.
“Are you all right?” she finally asked, unable to keep the concern out of her voice. “Does it hurt?”
Zack shrugged, keeping his back to her as he stirred the soup. “It’s fine. Should start healing before too long.”
“Who was that man?” Alix picked and peeled the label from her bottle. “I know he wasn’t a shifter. He smelled human.”
“One of Vardok’s guys, I guess.” Zack poured the soup into the bowls and carried them to the table. He put Alix’s down in front of her and handed her a spoon. “He’s probably got spies everywhere.”
Alix nodded and sniffed at the soup. It was an unnatural shade of yellow and had long white strips floating in it, along with chunks of some unidentifiable meat. She prodded at one of the chunks with her spoon.
“What is this?” she asked, nose wrinkling.
“Chicken noodle soup.” Zack raised a spoonful of the worm-like things to his mouth and chewed. “Eat it. It’s good for you.”
Alix cocked an eyebrow at that and tentatively spooned up a bit of broth. Hesitantly, she sipped it… and smiled.
“See?” Zack said with a grin. “Told you.”
They ate in silence for a few minutes, the only sound the clink of their spoons against their bowls and the howl of the wind outside. The fire Zack had started made the cabin comfortably warm. It felt as if they were in a bubble, tucked away from the rest of the world.
As she swallowed the last of her soup, Alix leaned back in her chair and delicately burped. Zack chuckled at that but said nothing.
“Do you think Colleen is okay?” she asked quietly.
“Yeah,” Zack said, even though Alix didn’t think he sounded very sure of himself. “She’s tough.”
Tough doesn’t mean immortal, Alix thought as her gaze went to the ragged hole in Zack’s shirt. He had stopped bleeding, at least. When she saw what Vardok’s man had done to him, she had gone white-hot with rage. All she knew was that Zack wasn’t moving, and that the man with the weapon was getting ready to hurt him again.
She had shifted without thinking. Opened her mouth and roared fire at him without caring. And even when she had turned him to ashes, she had wanted to do it again and again, until he was reduced to nothing but dust.
The most shocking thing was that she didn’t feel sorry for what she had done. Even after realizing that Zack wasn’t dead, she didn’t regret her actions. She had stopped him. She didn’t know or care what he might have planned to do to her, but he could have very easily killed Zack.
And if he had done that…
Alix shivered despite the warmth of the room, smiling slightly as Zack picked up his bowl and drank the last few dregs of soup from it.
“So what happens now?” she asked. “We can’t hide here forever.”
Zack nodded. “I know. But it’ll give us some time to breathe.”
Alix studied him for a few moments. “Why do I have the feeling that you’re not telling me something?”
Zack rose quickly and gathered their bowls. “No idea,” he said. He kept his back to her as he placed the bowls in the small sink.
Alix decided to let it go for the moment. She was too exhausted to argue and it was too late to start a fight. There’d be time enough for that tomorrow. As Zack washed the bowls, she rose and went to one of the windows. It was already dark outside and the snow was falling heavier than it had that morning. When she looked out to the world here, she could see nothing but blackness. No fireflies of light. No moon.
She gazed out to the nothingness, listening to the fire crackling in the hearthside. This place reminded her of home. There was no light except fire. No electricity. Their water supply came from a well, Zack had told her, and if she needed to relieve herself, there was a small privy in the backyard. The only warm place in the cabin was directly in front of the fireplace. Zack had cursed its lack of modern conveniences, but Alix loved it. She felt comfortable here.
She wondered if it would be like this in Vardok’s region. His kingdom was in the Northlands, a
dark place where it seemed to be perpetually dusk. Her father had told her of it once after he had returned from a meeting of kings. Even when the sun was high in the sky, the light in the North was murky and bleak. Nothing green grew there, but there were swamps and arid spaces and some lands where there was nothing but drifts of snow. There were no warm days. No flowers or gardens. Just neverending twilight.
The thought of living there for the rest of her life made something deep inside her feel hollow and aching. Trapped in a cold castle with only Vardok for company. Forced to sleep in the same bed with him and allow him to do whatever he wanted to do to her body. Made to carry his children and raise them to be monsters like their father…
The thought of it all nearly paralyzed her.
“Alix…” Zack stood by the fireplace. “Come sit down. Warm up.”
Alix nodded, hugging her arms to her chest, and joined him as he sat down. They sat at either end of the couch, an entire cushion between them. Alix glanced at him quickly. The firelight cast dancing shadows over his chiseled features. His blue eyes seemed to glow in the dimness. He turned to face her, propping his elbow along the back of the couch and digging his hand in his hair as he supported his head.
“I’m sorry about what happened,” he said quietly. “But you had to do it.”
Alix nodded, having a difficult time meeting his eyes.
“We have to expect more to come at some point.” Zack sighed heavily. “Vardok wants you back, and I think he’ll do whatever he has to do to get you.”
“But why?” she asked, her voice almost a whisper. “There are thousands of women he could choose from. I’m not special.”
“Yes, you are.” The tone of Zack’s voice made her look at him again. He was watching her with a quiet intensity that sent a chill down her spine. “How can you think that you’re not?”
Alix shook her head, staring into the flames again. “I was trying to imagine what it would be like… with him. Father said that the Northlands are like this place… cold and quiet. No sunlight.”
She sighed deeply.
“I don’t know what to do…” She closed her eyes for a moment. “I don’t want to go back. I feel like such a coward… but I can’t make myself do it.”
Zack said nothing for a few moments, but Alix sensed that he wanted to speak. She turned her gaze back to him and saw that he was frowning.
“You don’t approve?” she asked. “You think I should go back and marry him?”
Zack shook his head. “No.” He met her eyes again. “You don’t deserve that. But sometimes...”
Alix felt herself bristling. Was he actually questioning her decision? Judging her?
“Sometimes what?” She asked.
Zack shook his head and stood up. “Nothing. It’s nothing.”
He went to a small trunk at the foot of the bed and pulled out a few blankets. He tossed one onto the bed and kept the other in his arms.
“I’ll sleep on the couch,” he said. “Unless you’d rather be closer to the fire.”
“The bed’s fine,” she said. “Did you bring clothing for us?”
We left too quickly. I was going to run up to the apartment after the club closed.”
“So what we’re wearing is all that we have.” Alix looked down at herself, then at Zack. His clothing was just as ill-suited for cold weather as hers. “That’s just wonderful.”
“Would you rather be sitting beside Vardok right now?” Zack’s voice was cold. “Because that’s what would be happening if I hadn’t brought you here.”
“Maybe that would have been better.” Alix wished she had another room to escape to, a door to put some distance between them. “I’m going to bed.”
“Fine.”
She realized that their sudden irritation with each other was due to exhaustion and stress, but it didn’t make her feel any better. Maybe she should just leave it until morning, after they’d slept and calmed down. She went to the bed, which had luckily been protected from dust, for the most part, by several sheets. As Zack peeled off his shirt, she uncovered the bed, unable to stop watching him. His wound was already mostly healed. She’d forgotten that wolves healed more quickly than most other shifters. By morning, the only proof that he was shot would be his blood-stained shirt.
In the flickering light of the fire, Zack was magnificent. Despite her sudden anger with him, Alix could not deny that looking at him made her feel shaky inside, a feeling almost like hunger but deeper. It made her want something that she didn’t understand. She wanted to touch him. Be touched by him. She wanted to do whatever it was that comprised the act of mating, even though she only had a whisper of an idea of what that was.
But maybe he was like her father. Maybe he wanted her to do the right thing and go back. Any misguided notions she might have had about him actually wanting to help her were fading. As soon as the snow cleared, he would take her back.
Maybe this had all been a lie. Maybe he was placating her until Vardok commanded her to be returned. He wanted her to have a glimpse of the life she could lead because he felt sorry for her. All this had been arranged by her father, no doubt. She felt like a child who had been given a bit of candy to stop her from crying.
With great effort, she pushed those thoughts out of her mind. She trusted her father. She trusted Zack.
She crawled into the bed, fully dressed, and pulled the blankets up to her nose. From there, she could see Zack stretched out on the couch, arms behind his head, a frown on his face. His eyes were closed, thankfully, so he couldn’t tell that she was looking at him with a longing she didn’t understand.
8
Zack
Zack sat up on the couch and rolled his wounded shoulder, wincing slightly but otherwise pleased. Almost as good as new, and that was good enough.
He stood and pulled his shirt back on, then knelt in front of the hearth to rekindle the fire and toss on a few more logs. The cabin was chilly, but not freezing. He’d have to go out to bring more wood in before too long.
He glanced over to the bed, where Alix sprawled on her stomach, half uncovered. She snored softly and he almost laughed. How royal of you, he thought and smiled. The smile faded as he remembered how strained everything had become the night before. He had wanted very badly to tell her the truth about the arranged marriage, that her father was only trying to do the right thing, but he didn’t think she would listen to reason right now.
If he were completely honest with himself, he’d have to admit that he had no idea what to do. Vardok had given them a week to bring her home, even though he’d jumped the gun and sent his mercenaries after her early. She only had a few days left… and then what was he supposed to do? Drag her kicking and screaming to Vardok so he could marry her and take her away forever? Could he live with himself if he didn’t do it and thousands were killed in retaliation?
Could he live with himself if he did?
Sighing heavily, he roused himself to dig instant coffee out of one of the bags and fill up a metal coffee pot with water. Maybe after some caffeine he’d be able to think more clearly. Maybe then the situation wouldn’t seem as fucked.
Zack snooped around the cabin and found a stash of horror paperbacks. He spent the morning reading while Alix slept. He didn’t wake her. After everything she had gone through, she needed the rest. Around noon, she started tossing and turning, as if she were having bad dreams.
She woke with a gasp, sitting straight up in the bed. The way she was looking around the room, Zack knew that she was disoriented.
“Good afternoon,” he said and smiled. He hoped that if he acted pleasantly it would rub off on her. Trapped like this, it wouldn’t do either one of them any good to constantly bitch at each other.
Alix yawned and stretched. “What time is it?”
“After one.” Zack put his book down. “Are you hungry?”
“Starving,” she said as she stood. “Are we still fighting?”
Zack smiled. “Not unless you want to.”
“Well, I don’t.” Alix padded over to the small table in her bare feet. Zack bit back the urge to tell her to put some socks up so she’d retain more body heat. No need to make things more prickly by telling her what she should do.
“Hope you don’t mind soup again,” he said as he opened a can and dumped it into a pot.
When she wrapped her arms around his waist, he nearly dropped it.
“Do you know how long I’ve wanted to do this,” she asked softly, sliding her hands over his stomach, up to his chest, and then back down, lower, until her palms brushed the front of his jeans. He gasped in shock and sudden, electrifying arousal, and she laughed softly.
Her touch lingered, stroking his suffocating erection through the material. He had to grit his teeth for a moment to gather himself.
“Alix…” he breathed. “What are you doing?”
“What we’ve both wanted to do since we were kids.” She pressed her breasts against his back. “I think we’re old enough now.”
Zack turned to face her again and saw that she had stripped out of her clothes and stood nude before him. Her breasts were small but perfectly shaped. Her waist was so small he could probably fit both hands around it, and her hips flared out in a subtle curve that he desperately wanted to touch. Her long, white blond hair fell over her shoulders in waves. And the look in her eyes, the slight parting of her lips, told him that she was just as hungry as he was.
She took a step forward and undid his belt as she gazed into his eyes. Then she undid the button of his jeans and slid down the zipper. Smiling faintly, she slipped her hand into his pants and cupped his cock in her warm palm, watching his eyes closely as he reacted.
Undercover Wolf Shifter Page 6
