He’d never forgotten her.
Sensitive yet strong, capable yet vulnerable, earthy and sensual. She was hopelessly in love with him.
“I kept it.”
Jillian spun around. Once again she hadn’t heard a sound when he’d entered the room. He was framed in the doorway, his eyes dark and unreadable.
“I see that,” she replied in a hushed voice.
He crossed the room and dropped himself into a chair before the fire, his back to her. Jillian stood, hugging the precious book to her chest in silence. They were so close to the intimacy she’d always wanted from him that she was afraid to break the spell with words.
“I can’t believe you’re not bombarding me with questions,” he said carefully. “Like why did I keep it?”
“Why did you keep it, Grimm?” she asked, but it really didn’t matter why. He had carried it with him to this day, and that was enough.
“Come here, lass.”
Jillian gently placed the book on a table and approached him slowly. She hesitated a few paces from his side.
Grimm’s hand shot out and fastened on her wrist. “Jillian, please.” His voice was so low, it was almost inaudible.
“Please what?” she whispered.
Swiftly he flicked his wrist and she was standing before him, captured between his thighs. His eyes were fixed in the vicinity of her navel, as if he couldn’t summon the strength to raise them. “Kiss me, Jillian. Touch me. Show me I’m alive,” he whispered back.
Jillian bit her lip as his words slammed into her heart. The most valiant, intense man she’d ever known was afraid he wasn’t fully alive. He raised his head and she cried out softly at his expression. It was dark, his eyes swirling with shadows, memories of times she couldn’t even begin to comprehend. She cradled his face between her hands and kissed him, lingering on his lower lip, savoring the sensual curve.
“You’re the most incredibly alive man I’ve ever known.”
“Am I, Jillian? Am I?” he asked desperately.
How could he wonder about such a thing? His lips were warm and vital, his hands moved across her skin, awakening nerve endings she’d never suspected existed. “Why did you keep the book, Grimm?”
His hands fastened possessively on her waist. “I kept it to remind me that although there is evil, there is sometimes beauty and light. You, Jillian. You were always my light.”
Jillian’s heart soared. She’d come seeking confirmation of their fragile intimacy, to prove to herself that the tenderness and physical affection Grimm had offered her the night before had not been an isolated instance. She’d never dreamed that he might offer her words of … love? For what else were words like that if not words of love?
Her dreams were finally being realized. She’d always known there was a bond between herself and her wild-eyed beast-boy, but coming together as man and woman exceeded all her childhood fantasies.
Rising to his feet, Grimm pulled her against the muscled length of his body, unselfconsciously offering her the powerful evidence of his desire. The mere brush of him between her thighs made her shiver breathlessly.
“I can’t get enough of you, Jillian,” he breathed, fascinated by the sensual widening of her eyes, by the instinctive way her tongue wet the fullness of her lower lip. He captured it and kissed her slowly with scorching, lingering, mind-stealing kisses as he backed her toward the bed. Halfway there, he seemed to change his mind. He cupped her shoulders in his strong hands and turned her in his arms. Jillian had thought the sensation of him pressed against her thighs was too exciting to bear, but now the hard length of him rose hot against her, and she pushed back into him in a wordless plea. His hands began a languid journey over her body. He caressed the soft curve of her hips, slid his palms up the bow of her back, then slipped his arms around her to catch her breasts, finding the sensitive nipples and tugging them gently through the thin fabric of her chemise.
Gathering her hair in his hand, he tenderly tugged it to the side and kissed the exposed nape of her neck. The brief nip of his teeth caused her to arch her back and surge against him.
He edged her forward, guiding her past the bed and toward the wall. Pressing her close to the smooth stones, he twined his fingers between hers with his palms flush to the backs of her hands. He placed her palms against the wall above her head.
“Doona remove your hands from the wall, Jillian. No matter what I do, hold on to the wall and simply feel …”
Jillian held on to the wall as if it were her last hold on sanity. When he slipped her chemise from her body, she shivered as the cool air met her heated skin. His hands brushed the firm underside of her breasts, trailed over her waist, and hesitated on her hips. Then his fingers tightened on her skin and his tongue traced a lingering path down the hollow of her spine. She leaned against the wall, her palms flat, swaying with pleasure. By the time he was done, there was not one inch of her skin he hadn’t kissed or caressed with the velvety stroke of his tongue.
Now she understood why he’d told her to hold on to the wall. It had nothing to do with the wall itself and everything to do with preventing her from touching him. Being touched by Grimm Roderick, yet being unable to touch back, overwhelmed her senses and forced her to accept pure pleasure with no distractions.
He dropped to his knees behind her, and he told her—both with his hands and with a low rush of words—how beautiful she was, what she did to him, and how very much he wanted her, needed her.
He slid his hands up the insides of her thighs, trailing slow, heated kisses across the round curves of her bottom. A sudden gasp of pleasure escaped her when his hand found the sensitive center between her legs. As his fingers stroked her with an irresistible friction that coaxed a whimper from her throat, he nipped her buttock.
“Grimm!” she gasped.
Laughter laced with something dangerously erotic heightened her arousal even further. “Hands on the wall,” he reminded when she started to turn. He eased her thighs apart and maneuvered himself so that he was on the floor, gazing up at her, his face only inches from the part of her that was aching for his touch. She opened her mouth to protest his being so intimately positioned, when the heat of his tongue silenced any admonishment she may have made. Her neck arched and it took every ounce of her will not to scream from the stunning pleasure he ignited within her.
Then her gaze was drawn down to the magnificent warrior kneeling between her thighs. The vision of his face, intense with passion, coupled with the incredible feelings he was coaxing forth, shortened her breath to tiny, helpless pants. She rocked softly against him, making small, breathless cries unlike any sound she’d ever thought to make before.
“I’m going to fall,” she gasped.
“I’ll catch you, Jillian.”
“But I don’t think we should—oh!”
“Don’t think,” he agreed.
“But my legs … won’t … hold!”
He laughed, and with a swift tug yanked her down on top of him. They tumbled onto a woven rug in a press of heated skin and tangled limbs. “And to think you were afraid to fall,” he teased.
She savored the incredible closeness of their bodies, and at that moment she fully let go. As she fell against him, she fell even more completely in love with him, into a mindless passion. He would always catch her—that she knew without a doubt. They rolled across the rug in a playful skirmish for the superior position, then he flipped her so suddenly that she landed on her hands and knees. In an instant he was behind her, nudging into the cleft between the soft curves of her bottom, and she gasped aloud.
“Now,” she cried.
“Now,” he agreed, and drove into her.
She felt him deep inside her, filling her, joining them together. Cupping her breasts, he thrust inside her, and she felt so connected to him that it took her breath away. She made a sound of supreme dismay when he slipped out, leaving an ache deep inside her, and she purred with pleasure when he filled her again so deeply that she arched her back
and rose up against him, her shoulders pressing against his hard chest
He must have awakened something inside her, Jillian decided, because it took only a few more thrusts for her body to break free and shatter into a thousand quivering pieces. She would never get enough of him.
Hours later, a sated Jillian was lying in a puddle of contentment on his bed. When his hands began their sensual dance upon her body, she sighed. “I couldn’t possibly feel that again, Grimm,” she protested weakly. “I haven’t a muscle left in my body, and I simply couldn’t …”
Grimm smiled wickedly. “When I was younger I stayed with Gypsies for a time.”
Jillian lay back against the pillow, wondering what this had to do with the earth-shattering explosions he’d been lavishing upon her.
“They had a strange ceremony they practiced to induce ‘Vision.’ It didn’t rely upon a mixture of herbs and spices or the smoking of a pipe. It relied upon sexual excess to achieve a state that transcended the everyday frame of mind. They would place one of their seers in a tent with a dozen women, who repeatedly brought him to climax until he was begging for no more pleasure. The Rom claim climax releases something in the body that causes the spirit to soar, ripping it free from its earthly mooring, opening it to the extraordinary.”
“I believe that.” Jillian was fascinated. “It makes me feel as if I’ve drunk too much sweet wine—my head gets swimmy and my body feels weak and strong at the same time.” When his fingers found the juncture of her thighs, she shivered. With a few deft movements, he had her tingling, hungering all over again, and when he brought her to a swift release with his hands, it was even more exquisite than the last. “Grimm!” Heat erupted inside her, and she shuddered. He didn’t remove his hand, but cupped her gently until she calmed. Then he began again, moving his fingers in a light teasing motion over the sensitive nub.
“And again, my sweet Jillian, until you can no longer look at me without knowing what I can do to you, where I can take you, how many times I can take you there.”
For Grimm there was no rest that night. He paced the stone floor, kicking at the lambskin rugs, wondering how he was going to bring himself to do the right thing this time. Never in his life had he allowed himself to get too attached to anything or anyone, because he’d always known that at any moment he might have to leave, fleeing the hunt the McKane perpetuated against any man suspected of being Berserk.
They’d found him in Durrkesh. Quinn was right. What was to prevent them from coming to Caithness? They could have easily followed the lumbering cart upon which they’d transported the sick men. And if they descended upon Caithness again, what harm would this blessed place suffer? What harm might they do to Jillian’s home and Jillian herself? Edmund had died as a result of the last McKane attack. Maybe he’d caught a lung fever, but if he hadn’t been wounded to begin with, he would never have caught the disease that had claimed his young life.
Grimm couldn’t live with the thought of bringing harm—again—to Caithness and Jillian.
He stopped by the bed, gazed down at her, and watched her with his heart in his eyes. I love you, Jillian, he willed to her sleeping form. Always have, and always will. But I’m Berserk, and you—you’re the best of life. I have an insane old da and a crumbling pile of rocks to call home. It’s no life for a lady.
He forced his dark thoughts away, scattering them with his formidable will. Sinking into her body was all he wanted to contemplate. These past two days with Jillian had been the best two days of his life. He should be content with that, he told himself.
She rolled over in her sleep, her hand falling palm open, fingers slightly curled. Her golden hair fanned out across the white pillows, her full breasts spilled above the downy linen. Just one more day, he promised himself, and one more blissful, magical, incredible night. Then he’d leave, before it was too late.
CHAPTER 19
QUINN AND RAMSAY SACKED THE KITCHENS OF CAITHNESS at dawn. Not one piece of fruit, not one slab of meat, not a single savory morsel was spared.
“Christ, I feel like I haven’t eaten solid food in weeks!”
“We damn near haven’t. Broth and bread don’t count as real food.” Ramsay tore off a chunk of smoked ham with his teeth. “I haven’t had an appetite until now. That damn poison made me so sick, I thought I might never want to eat again!”
Quinn palmed an apple and bit into it with relish. Platters were piled haphazardly atop every available surface. The maids would faint when they discovered the men had wiped out all the food that had been prepared for the coming weekend.
“We’ll hunt and replenish.” Quinn felt mildly guilty as his gaze swept the decimated larder. “You up to a bit of hunting, Ram, my man?”
“So long as it’s wearing a skirt,” Ramsay said with a gusty sigh, “and answers to the name of Jillian.”
“I don’t think so,” Quinn replied acerbically. “Perhaps you didn’t notice, but Jillian obviously has a bit of a tendre for me. If I hadn’t gotten sick at Durrkesh, I would have proposed marriage and we would be betrothed by now.”
Ramsay took a deep slug of whisky and placed the bottle on the counter with a thump. “You really are dense, aren’t you, de Moncreiffe?”
“Don’t tell me you think it’s you.” Quinn rolled his eyes.
“Of course not. It’s that bastard Roderick. It always has been, ever since we got here.” Ramsay’s dark expression was murderous. “And after what happened two nights ago …”
Quinn stiffened. “What happened two nights ago?”
Ramsay took another swallow, swished it over his tongue, and brooded a silent moment. “Did you notice the long table in the hall is gone, Quinn?”
“Now that you mention it, yes, it is. What happened to it?”
“I saw pieces of it out back behind the bothy. It was shattered down the center.”
Quinn said nothing. He knew of only one man who could shatter a table of such massive proportions with his bare hands.
“I came down yesterday to find the maids sweeping food off the floor. One of the candelabra was wedged into the wall. Someone had a helluva fight in there two nights ago. But nobody has breathed a word about it, have they?”
“What are you saying, Logan?” Quinn asked grimly.
“Just that the only two people who were well enough to dine in the hall two nights ago were Grimm and Jillian. They obviously fought, but today Grimm didn’t seem bitter. And Jillian, why, the woman has been wreathed in smiles and good humor. Matter of fact, just as a little test, what say we go wake Grimm right now and talk to him about it? That is, if he’s not otherwise occupied.”
“If you’re insinuating that Jillian might be in his chambers, you’re a stupid bastard and I’ll call you out for it,” Quinn snapped. “And maybe there was a fight in the hall between them, but I guarantee you that Grimm is far too honorable to seduce Jillian. Besides, he can’t even bring himself to say a civil word to her. He certainly couldn’t be nice to her long enough to seduce her.”
“You don’t find it curious that just when it seemed like you were making progress with her, you and I get poisoned and put out of the running, but he doesn’t?” Ramsay asked. “I’d say it was suspiciously convenient. I think it’s damned odd that he didn’t get sick too.”
“He didn’t consume any of the poison,” Quinn defended.
“Maybe that’s because he knew what was poisoned in advance,” Ramsay argued.
“That’s enough, Logan!” Quinn snapped. “It’s one thing to accuse him of wanting Jillian. Hell, we all want her. But it’s entirely another to accuse him of trying to kill us. You don’t know a damn thing about Grimm Roderick.”
“Maybe you’re the one who doesn’t know him,” Ramsay countered. “Maybe Grimm Roderick pretends to be something he’s not. I, for one, plan to wake him right now and find out.” Ramsay stalked from the room, muttering under his breath.
Quinn shook his head and vaulted after him. “Logan, would you cool your heels—”<
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“No! You’re so convinced of his innocence, I say let’s make him prove it!” Ramsay took the stairs to the west wing three at a time, and Quinn had to lope to keep up. As Logan sped down the long corridor, Quinn overtook him and placed a restraining hand on his shoulder, but Ramsay shook it off.
“If you’re so convinced he wouldn’t do it, what are you afraid of, de Moncreiffe? Let’s just go rouse him.”
“You’re not thinking clearly about this, Ram—” Quinn broke off abruptly as the door to Grimm’s chambers eased opened.
When Jillian slipped out into the hallway, his eyes widened incredulously. There was unequivocally no reason for Jillian to be leaving Grimm’s chambers in the wee hours of the morning but for the reason Ramsay had suggested. She was his lover.
Quinn instantly ducked back, pulling Ramsay with him into the shadowed alcove of a doorway.
Her hair was disheveled, and she wore only a woolen draped about her shoulders. Although it trailed nearly to the floor, it left little doubt that there was nothing beneath it.
“Odin’s balls,” he whispered.
Ramsay favored him with a mocking smile as they lurked in the dark alcove. “Not the honorable Grimm Roderick, right, Quinn?” he whispered.
“That son of a bitch.” Quinn’s gaze lingered on Jillian’s sweet curves as she disappeared down the hallway. The early rays of dawn coming in the tall windows colored his eyes with a strangely crimson glint as he stared at Ramsay.
“Some best friend, eh, de Moncreiffe? He knew you wanted her. He doesn’t even offer her marriage. He just takes it for free.”
“Over my dead body he will,” Quinn vowed.
“Her da brought three men here so she could choose a husband. And what does he do? Both you and I would do the honorable thing, marry her and give her a name, babes, and a life. Roderick tups her and will likely saunter off into the sunset, and you know it. That man has no intention of wedding her. If he possessed one honorable intention, he would have left her to you or me, men who would do right by her. I’m telling you, you don’t know him as well as you think.”
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