by Cara Bristol
Fear vanished. Rage filled the void. She balled her fists and rounded on him. “I was concerned for your safety, and you mock me? How dare you! All my life, if I wasn’t ignored, I was ridiculed. Your customs and concepts are foreign and strange to me! I don’t make fun of you! Don’t try to reshape me into a…a…Terran. My beliefs are the only possessions I own. Do not take them from me!”
She snatched up her veil and rushed for the door.
“Mariska, wait!”
She ignored him and fled for the sanctuary of her cabin. Inside, she flung herself on the comfortable berth and let hot tears of confusion fall. Kai had been so kind but then had laughed at her, transporting her back to her childhood when she’d been taunted by the other children. Korvi! Korvi! Ugly, ugly, they had shrieked, shoving each other.
She slipped her hand under the neckline of her gown and fingered the slightly rough birthmark. The spiral also set her apart from her people, but it had saved her life, too. No one dared touch her or the mark lest the Great One smite him. But she’d always been able to touch it.
Kai had, also—and still lived. Maybe the prohibition didn’t apply to alien nonbelievers?
That had to be it—because the other possibility was that the spiral was nothing more than a discoloration in skin pigment, and her people’s certainties were myths. And if that was the case, how would she know what to believe?
Chapter Ten
Way to go, asshole.
Kai kicked himself. His defenses had been down, his emotions wide open, and he’d simply reacted. He hadn’t meant to laugh, had tried to cover it, but she hadn’t been fooled. She could be so perceptive about some things, but others she never questioned. He’d touched the birthmark, and she’d freaked, believing he could be killed. It had saved her life because Obido believed it was significant, but the spiral was just a discoloration in pigment. He’d touched it, and nothing happened! No lightning bolt had zigzagged from the heavens to strike him dead. It didn’t even really look like a spiral, just a roundish splotch. They could have called it the holy moon or the blessed baseball and been just as accurate.
As soon as you ventured off your home planet and entered the galaxy at large, you realized no consensus of truth existed. Beliefs were as different as the people who held them. One person’s joke formed another’s sacred dogma.
Planetary leaders and diplomats managed to find common ground among diversity. Cyberoperatives? Not so much. His job of infiltration, intelligence gathering, and the occasional assassination didn’t require open-mindedness. He was too used to being around other cyborgs whose feelings weren’t easily hurt.
He’d blown it. Just as she’d been coming out of her shell, he’d laughed. He didn’t believe in the tenets and customs she held sacred, but she’d been reviled too much already. Adding to the hurt she’d experienced was the last thing he wanted to do.
An apology was most definitely in order, but if he approached her now, she’d throw it back in his face. Better to let her cool off a bit while he figured out why he was such an asshole. Kai flopped into the pilot’s chair.
A long strand of Mariska’s hair had caught on his sleeve. He plucked it off and examined it. Why did she look so different from the members of her race? Was it a recessive gene? Was there some Terran blood in her family? Or in Lamis-Odg as a whole? Were others born without the ridge? The answers were out there; he just didn’t have access to them.
Kai let the strand fall and sighed. He wasn’t only in deep water with Mariska. Carter would be pissed at him, too. He didn’t want to talk to the director yet, but he should let him know he was all right.
Since the Panthera flew itself, he didn’t need to do anything. He opened an encrypted communication channel.
What the fuck are you doing? Fellow cyborg Brock Mann didn’t waste words on pleasantries.
That was the question of the day. Nice to talk to you, too.
You should have talked to Carter. He’s going ape shit.
I figured he would be. That’s why I called you. The decision to rescue Mariska had been made at the last second with no opportunity to notify Carter. Plus, he disliked lying to the Cy-Ops director any more than he had to.
He was about to send in the cavalry. You almost ignited a war.
Kai grimaced. He’d be assigned to the least desirable missions for years to come. Tell Carter I’ll be in touch when I can.
How sure are you about this woman?
He knew about Mariska? Fuck! That meant Carter had shared the details of the mission. Brock could have been assigned to hunt him down.
He was about to snap the channel closed when Brock’s message came through. I’m not Carter’s trained monkey.
Of course, that’s exactly what Brock would say if Carter had dispatched him to bring Kai in. Yeah, right.
Fuck you. I’m not saying he didn’t try to use me, but I’d never betray a brother.
Sorry.
Be sure you know what you’re doing.
Mariska has been marginalized her entire life. But Obido’s mate, Janai, is almost always at his side. She’s heard a lot. She’s the one Cy-Ops should focus on.
I’ll pass it on. Where are you headed now?
I wish I knew.
You might mull it over while relaxing on Darius 4.
The sex resort?
Just a suggestion.
Who the hell would go to a pleasure resort while on the lam? Hmm… Thanks for the tip.
No problem. Let me know if I can do anything else to help.
Will do. Kai closed the channel. Logic, his mission, and cold, hard facts said to benefit the greater good, he should have allowed Mariska to be sent to Katnia. He might have been able to inveigle himself with Janai. But he couldn’t allow an innocent woman to be murdered. Sitting behind a desk, Carter liked to play the tough guy, but Kai had a hunch that if the director had been in the field, if he’d met Mariska, he would have intervened to save her, too.
* * * *
She had fallen asleep, one hand curled under her head, her cheeks stained with tears. Her veil, puddled on the floor, gave him hope he could fix the mess he’d created. Before leaving the space station, he’d only seen her face the one time her father had ordered her to remove the veil. So this was progress.
She would be safe temporarily on Darius 4—no one would likely search there, but the planet was a popular resort. They couldn’t stay forever. Eventually, he would have to face the Cy-Ops director, and then what would become of her? How would she survive in a galaxy so foreign to her? Did she have any marketable skills to parlay into a livelihood? She couldn’t read!
He sighed and sat on the edge of the berth. He touched her shoulder. “Mariska.”
Her eyelids fluttered open. A smile spread across her face, before remembrance struck, and she scowled. “What do you want?”
“I came to apologize.” Kai lifted his hand from her shoulder and raked it through his hair. “I’m sorry for laughing. It was rude.”
She sat up, swung her legs off the bed, and moved to the window offering an expansive view of the stars. “But you don’t believe me.”
“You believe it, and I should accept that. There’s no excuse for what I did, other than the fact that I’m an asshole.”
“What’s an asshole?”
“A jerk. A guy who’s not very nice. Who’s selfish and only thinks of himself.”
“You saved my life. I don’t think an asshole would do that.”
She was more generous than he deserved. “Well, I’m sorry for what I said and did.”
“Apology accepted.” She rubbed her hands down her thighs. “The Panthera is very comfortable. I like the spaciousness of the cabins and that I can see out.”
“I’m glad.” Guessing she was claustrophobic, he’d assigned her the triple-sized captain’s cabin with the large viewing windows.
Between her profile and her reflection on the glass, Kai got a 3-D view of her strikin
g face. In another era and place, she might have been revered for her beauty. She didn’t resemble her father at all. “What do you know about your mother?”
“She was put to death after giving birth to me.”
He winced. “I mean before your father took her as his mate. What was her name?”
“She was called Alondralin.”
“Did your father and mother meet on Lamis-Odg?”
She nodded. “Oh yes. I was told her father offered a high dowry for her.”
“What about your mother’s mother? Was she born on Lamis-Odg?”
“I assume so. Why?”
“I’d like to learn a little more about you,” he prevaricated.
“I’m not interesting.”
A beautiful woman who didn’t know it, who’d been oppressed by a terrorist regime, yet who found the guts to sever ties, the graciousness to forgive his boorish behavior? “I think you’re very interesting.”
She blushed. “You flatter me.”
“I tell the truth.” When he could. She returned her attention to the stars, and Kai took advantage of her study to open a channel to Brock.
Yes? His fellow cyborg responded right away.
Find out what you can about a woman named Alondralin. She’s Mariska’s mother, a former mate of Obido.
Where is she living now?
She’s not. She’s deceased.
It’s hard to get info on Lamis-Odg, but I’ll do what I can. Anything in particular I should watch for?
Find out if there are any Terran connections.
It would be helpful if you could send me a sample of Mariska’s DNA.
Her brush poked out of her bag. The Panthera was equipped with a small science lab. He could slip a strand of her hair into the analyzer and transmit the gene sequence to Brock. I’ll see what I can do. He closed the link.
Mariska clasped her hands. “I’m sorry about the way I acted before,” she said in a low voice. “Running out.”
“No apology needed,” he said.
“Why did your friend call you ugly?”
He chuckled. “It’s a guy thing. Insults show we care.”
“It’s odd.”
“I can’t argue that.”
“I have a lot to learn.”
He couldn’t argue that either. “I’ll help you.” Due to the Association of Planets’ embargo, her people had been cut off from cultural interchange as well as trade. As a female, she’d been kept illiterate, and she had been ostracized because of her supposed deformity. Given her isolation, it was amazing she’d been able to adapt as much as she had.
She took a deep breath, which lifted and swelled her breasts. “I have never mated with a man.”
Kai blinked. That was an about-face. “Oh.”
“You do not seem to be repulsed by…my appearance,” she said.
Oh. No. He could see the direction this conversation headed, and so could his cock, which perked up. Pick me! Pick me! Blood rushed south. “Mariska…”
“Would you—could you—show me what it’s like?”
“Show you how?” He hoped she wanted to watch a porn vid. And hoped she didn’t.
“Would you mate with me?”
What the hell did he do now? Making love with her wouldn’t be a hardship. Far from it. But he would be taking advantage of her innocence and ignorance because, as soon as he figured out a permanent solution, he would resume his regularly scheduled life—after facing whatever punishment Carter meted out.
What if rejecting her tempting offer delivered the killing blow to her budding self-esteem? Perhaps making love to her might help to convince her of her beauty and worth. Yeah, because sleeping with a woman and then leaving her flat always does wonders for her ego.
Mariska placed her palms against his chest and slid them up to his shoulders. He grabbed her wrists to remove them, but her racing pulse stopped him. “You seemed to like kissing me,” she said.
More than she knew, but he shouldn’t have done it. He needed to keep a clear head and sense of purpose.
She rose onto tiptoe and brushed her lips against his. Pick me! Pick me! Her sweet scent enveloped him like invisible ropes binding him to her. This was what happened when he allowed his little brain to do the choosing. Kissing her had been the worst possible thing he could have done. Of course she’d gotten the wrong idea.
“I do. Uh, did. But I’m not sure it was wise.” He still held her wrists, but now his thumb caressed the underside. His body and Mariska’s had teamed up to conspire against him.
She flicked her tongue against the seam of his lips. Kai growled, tucked her arms around his neck, and covered her mouth with his. A few kisses to convince her I desire her, then I’ll let her down.
Who are you fooling?
He encircled her waist with his hands, locking her pelvis against his. His erection thrust against her soft belly. The scent and touch of her stormed his human senses, fried his cyborg circuits. His heart pounded a rapid beat, echoed by a throb much lower. He kissed her, plundering the deep recesses of her mouth, then dragged his lips across her cheek to press against the corner of her eyes, her temple, her ear.
Defenses crashed. In truth, they’d been fragile to begin with. Even before he’d seen her face, she’d intrigued him. Her fluid grace, her soft voice, the vulnerability he’d glimpsed in her beautiful eyes. Her resilience and courage. An indomitable, pure spirit that somehow had remained uncorrupted by evil.
“Are you sure you want this?” he murmured.
She nodded.
How could she know? She had little experience to enable her to judge the situation. He felt like the worst sort of asshole to use her and then leave her.
“I can’t make you any promises,” he said. “I won’t be able to stay. I have to rejoin…my unit.” How was that for a pick-up line? Hey, babe, wanna fuck?
Although sex with her wouldn’t be part of a long-term relationship, it wasn’t meaningless either. He would carry the memory forever. A bit of heaven and a dose of regret tied together by duty and desire. He didn’t want to sleep with her for the physical release; he needed the physical release because he desired her.
She shook her head. “I don’t care.”
But she should, and only a selfish jerk would accept her words at face value, but the price of doing the right thing cost too much. He sought her mouth, and she moaned and melted against him. He explored the slope of her neck, her throat, her collarbone. She slid her hands underneath his shirt to caress his back, drag the pads of her fingers down his spine.
Kai led her to the double-wide berth. He grabbed the hem of his shirt then hesitated. He needed her to be certain. “Are you sure?” he had to ask her again, though it killed him. What if she said no? What if she had second thoughts?
She huffed. “Are men from your planet always so difficult to seduce?”
He chuckled. “Not usually, no.” Kai followed through on removing his shirt then shucked out of his boots and pants. He paused and then yanked off his underwear. Her cheeks reddened, but she held his gaze. He tugged off her tunic then divested her of the leggings. Her underwear consisted of filmy thin briefs and a sleeveless top, the straps of which did not fully cover her spiral birthmark.
Note to self: right shoulder off limits. He’d gone this far; he didn’t want her shrieking and fleeing from his bed. He eyed her taut nipples tenting the fabric. There was much more to focus on anyway.
He pulled her to him for another steamy kiss, lifting her off the ground so that her toes skimmed his shins. He ensured her body slid down his as he settled her back on her feet. She clutched at his arms. “Do all Terran men look like you?” She kneaded his biceps with her fingers. “Are they as strong?”
No. Enhanced musculature came with being a cyborg. He’d always had a well-defined physique, but not this developed. The nanocytes injected into his blood had modified the muscle fibers. “More or less,” he answered. A few non-cyborg Ter
ran men after rigorous weight lifting training approximated his bulk.
She brushed his erection. “As…large?”
He grinned. No enhancement there. “More or less.”
She trailed her fingers over his temples and his forehead. Her touch lit a path of fire. “Men—people—on your planet don’t have ridges.”
“No.”
“Dale is Terran, then, too.”
Kai snarled, and she yanked her hand away, her body tensing in alarm.
What the hell was wrong with him? The jealous rumble had burst from his throat before he could stop it. “I’m sorry.” There had been no sexual intent to what she’d said, but he disliked her mentioning another man in any context—especially one who’d flirt with her in a heartbeat if given the chance.
Maybe Dale can take Mariska under his wing when I return to Cy-Ops.
Dale with the broken nose could take Mariska under his wing. Kai would bash in his friend’s face. Panthera or no Panthera.
“What did I say wrong?”
“Nothing.” He leaned his forehead against hers, closed his eyes, and strove for calm. When he’d gotten a grip, he opened his eyes and then pulled her undershirt over her head. Her breasts were as he’d imagined: large, rose-tipped handfuls. He pressed them together then buried his face between the mounds.
She giggled. “Your beard tickles.”
He shifted and drew a nipple into his mouth. She stopped laughing and sucked in a breath. While he teased the buds to greater tautness, he hooked his thumbs into her briefs and drew them down. He slipped a hand between her thighs. Wetness coated his fingers as he massaged. She gave a little gasp. Against her breast, Kai smiled.
Her hands closed around his cock. Gripped in her small but tight fist, heat surged.
“Is this all right?” she asked.
“More than all right.”
She slid her hands the length of his erection, pumping the shaft. “In addition to receiving instruction in the home arts, women are taught how to please our mates sexually.” She squeezed and cupped his balls. “I haven’t mated, but I’ve been tutored in the process.”
