Hawk (Sex and Bullets Book 2)

by Jo Raven

  “I wanted to ask you something,” she says, catching my hand before I do much more than slip it under her dress.

  “If you’re gonna ask me whether the driver can see or hear you as you come, I’m not gonna answer. Because half the fun is not knowing.” I wink at her.

  “No, not about that.” She blushes, and my dick likes that, trying to drill a hole through my pants.

  I love that she’s open to me, that her emotions are there for me to see.

  “What is it?” I ask gently, though I leave my hand where it is, on her knee, because I like having it there. “You can ask me whatever you want. You know that.”

  She nods. “I wanted…” She bites her lip, and fuck, she’s adorable, and hot, and so damn sexy. “To ask you about how you lost part of your hearing as a kid.”

  What. The. Fuck.

  I blink at her, and withdraw my hand from under her dress. It’s clenching into a fist, I note distantly, and force myself to relax it.

  “Why?” I clear my throat. “Why are you asking me this?”

  She’s looking at me, her big eyes vulnerable. “I talked to Storm and Rook. About your grandfather. I wanted to understand you. Understand why you went on that first suicide mission. Why you were going to go again, before I left.”

  I nod. I shouldn’t be angry. She did it because she cares for me. I know that now. And thank God, I’ve gotten a better hold on my tongue nowadays, not blurting out whatever nasty doubt and defensive thought comes to my mind.

  “You could have asked me,” I say, keeping my voice quiet, and meet her gaze. “I’d have told you.”

  “I know.” She reaches for my hand and our fingers tangle together. “I know that now. Which is why I’m asking you about this, and not them.”

  Relieved, I turn her hand over, study it. So small against mine. So graceful and smooth.

  “It never was a viral infection that took part of my hearing away. That was what I told the guys when they asked about it. What I told anyone who knew. Even my parents.” I lift her hand to my lips and kiss it. “Remember I told you my grandfather threw me against the wall a few times when I first moved in with him? That was the reason. One of the hits damaged my inner ear.”

  “Oh God.” She leans closer, pulls her hand free to cup my cheek. Tears are glittering in her eyes. “I’m so sorry. He was a bastard.”

  I frown. Was he? “I never told anyone, because he was the only adult who really saw me as a person. He saw me and recruited me. Gave me a purpose. Told me what was important. What I was supposed to do.”

  “Do you still believe that?”

  Fuck, this is hard to say, because my grandfather was my world until he died. He may have knocked me around, but he also raised me. Set me straight. Gave me discipline and his twisted sort of love, which was much more than anything my parents ever had.

  But I can finally admit what he did, say it out loud. The roses inked into my chest burn with phantom pain as my secrets come to light.

  “My grandfather… he made me believe I wasn’t meant to have a life. He was rattled by what he guessed my parents were doing, I guess. He hammered it into me, into my head…” I laugh, the irony too great. “Yeah, he actually hammered all this into my head. He punched and shoved and slammed me into the walls, and every time he said he was training me to be a soldier for the world. He made me believe it was on me to make things right. Only, he never taught me that I wasn’t alone with this burden. That I’m not the only one responsible. Or that I have an even bigger responsibility—to my family. To those I love. That one day I’d fall in love. That I’d find someone like you, someone who matters to me more than the world.”

  “Hawk…” She’s stroking my cheek, my beard, running her fingers through it.

  “I’m not a hero,” I tell her, the admission painful. “I’ve tried to be.” I rub the words inked on my forearms over the soft cloth of my shirt. “I had these tats done after he died.”

  “What do they mean?”

  “Vivo Ut Serviam. I live to serve. And Ad Serviam Veritatem. In the service of the truth. I believed that was my purpose in life. The reason I was born. But now… I dunno anymore. Or rather, I do. I’ve done my part. I thought I had nothing to live for. But I do. I do have something—someone to live for. I have you. Let Rook ask his friends for help. I’m done.”

  She leans in to kiss me, and I place my hand behind her head and draw her to me. My other hand is over her tits, over her hip, and she’s frantically fumbling with my zipper, the leather squeaking underneath us, and the windows fogging up.

  I guess we’re gonna try a different position in the back of the limo first.

  I tug her panties to the side, and she guides my cock inside her, her mouth never leaving mine. I suck on her tongue, and she nips at my lips and fuck, I’m coming apart so fast I don’t know what hit me.

  Layla. Riding my cock, her hair tickling my face, her eyes closed, her hands tangling at the back of my neck, rising and falling on me like a naked flame.

  Burning away the past. Burning my soul. Branding me as hers.

  “Marry me, Layla,” I whisper, like I’ve done every day for the past four months. She always says no. “Marry me.”

  “Yes.” She laughs, and it takes me a long moment to realize this time she didn’t refuse. This time she accepted, and then she’s kissing me, and tears are slipping down her face. “Yes.”

  “God, I love you,” I breathe, closing my eyes, and I know I’ll love her to the end of time.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  I want to thank so many people, and I am sure I am forgetting some (I always do, sadly). I am so lucky and grateful to the lovely friends and collaborators I have the pleasure of spending time with and benefiting from.

  THANK YOU!

  First of all, like always, to all of you wonderful readers who support us authors, encourage us, cheer us on. You may never know what a blessing you are. That on days when we think we might give up, you say one kind word and everything shines again.

  To my amazing PA Tracy Comeford for keeping me on track and sending me off to write when I’ve procrastinated too much…

  To my two crazy guardian angels – Leah Michele and Kerry Fletcher for supporting me, helping me, giving me their precious opinions on everything from stories to covers to marketing and for running my readers’ group and street team. You, ladies, rock!

  To some awesome friends without whom I’d never have made it: Nathalie Aynié, Jade West, Kia Zi Shiru, Cora Brent, Stephanie Witter, Amber Burning, Zelah Meyer, Ashley Paternostro, Michelle McGinty, Emma Johnston, Ellie Aspill.

  Special thanks to Lisa J. Anderson for helping me look for the perfect cover for HAWK and encouraging me and discussing the book with me over the past few months – as well as beta reading the prequel for me. Many thanks also to Leah Michele and Kerry Fletcher for the help with locating the cover model.

  Many thanks also to Gina Paulus and Lilian Flesher for beta reading the prequel, and to the same ladies plus Maxine McKormick, Angie Mitchell and Courtney Jewell for beta reading Hawk.

  Many thanks to 5 Times Formatting for the great formatting.

  Like I said, I am sure I am forgetting lots of people. If you’re reading this book, then know I am grateful to you for your support!

  AUTHOR BIO

  Jo Raven is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author, best known for her series Inked Brotherhood and Damage Control. She writes edgy, contemporary New Adult romance with sexy bad boys and strong-willed heroines. She writes about MMA fighters and tattoo artists, dark pasts that bleed into the present, loyalty and raw emotion.

  Find all my books here ▶ http://joraven.com/books

  Be the first to get your hands on my new releases & offers, giveaways, previews, and more by signing up here ▶ http://bit.ly/1CTNTHM

  Meet me online—on Facebook ▶ https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJoRaven, chat with me on Twitter ▶ @AuthorJoRaven, and join my readers group for sneak previews of my covers and st
ories ▶ http://on.fb.me/1K2LvzO.

  REVIEWS MATTER…

  If you like my books, please think to leave a review on amazon or any other site. It would mean the world to me, and it helps me get the word about my books out there. Thank you!

  Have you read CAUGHT, the prequel to HAWK? Have you read Storm (Sex and Bullets 1)? Here you can read excerpts and find the purchase links:

  http://joraven.com/the-sex-and-bullets-series

  WATCH THE TRAILER FOR HAWK: https://youtu.be/JI3QwO_hwK4

  What comes next?

  ▶ ROOK (Sex and Bullets #3)

  It’s my turn to fight the shady Organization that’s dug its fucking claws into every business in my town. Setting up my trap while keeping my friends safe is a challenge – and my private life shouldn’t interfere.

  Except it does. Because the only way to reach the center of the web is to crawl right into the spider’s lair – and that turns out to be the Cronin Scarlet Hotel. Luxury hotel with a kink, and my regular haunt.

  The perfect way in. Nobody will bat an eye if I ask for my usual relief from stress in one of their stylish pain rooms with some random girl who likes to dom. It will only take a phone call.

  But there’s one complication: Mia.

  A very sexy complication. She works at the hotel as a maid, and she’s prim and proper and damn pretty. So buttoned up, her gaze so icy when she looks at me, she pushes all my buttons. I want to tie her up, I want her to tie me up, I want to try every filthy kink possible with her.

  But she doesn’t want anything to do with me. Or at least, she didn’t, until the last time I happened to be there. One searing hot kiss and I was lost.

  Why do I want a girl who’s nothing like the dominant women I usually go for? And how the hell am I going to keep my mind on taking down the corrupted Organization when she’s around?

  On Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30589479-rook