“You have good taste in coffee, Mr. Harris.” Tilly walked around him and the counter, a faint challenge in her voice.
“Hello, Mrs. Westerveld,” Luke said. “Nice to see you again.”
Tilly gave him a tight smile, added a lifted eyebrow as if she didn’t quite believe him, then turned to her daughter. “A couple of those sugar containers need to be replaced. The spouts don’t work properly.”
“Sure, Mom,” Janie replied, turning to wipe down the counter in front of her. “I’ll write that down.”
Janie faced Luke, her back to Tilly so he caught the faint eye roll and the hint of a sigh in the lift of her shoulders.
“I cleaned out the back room, too. It was quite dirty.”
Another eye roll.
“And you might want to look at a few of your chairs. They wobble. Add that to your list, too.”
Janie’s only reply to her mother’s assertive comment was a tight nod. She looked tired, and though he was certain her mother meant well, he guessed Janie simply didn’t need the extra work right now.
“I can take a look at the chairs,” Luke offered.
Tilly glanced at him, as if she had forgotten he was there.
“Just tell me which ones they are. I’ve got a few tools in the truck.”
“Your coffees are ready,” Hannah said, handing Luke a cardboard tray with four cups.
“They’ll stay hot for a while.”
Tilly gave Luke another once-over and then beckoned with her finger. “Very well. Follow me.”
He wove around the tables with customers. A few people glanced up at him. Some smiled. The place was full. Obviously business was good.
“It’s these two,” Tilly said, giving the offending chairs a quick shake.
Luke tipped them over and figured out what the problem was. One quick trip to the truck and a few minutes later he had the screws holding the legs to the chair frames tightened. Checked out the table for good measure and had managed to tweak a smile out of Janie’s mother.
“Thank you, Luke. We appreciate your help.” Tilly’s attitude had thawed a half a degree.
“Anytime.” He sauntered over to the counter and picked up his order.
Janie frowned at him, glanced over her shoulder as if to make sure her mother was far enough away, then leaned forward. “What are you doing?” she whispered.
“Fixing your chairs,” he whispered back.
Janie gave him with a warning look. “And that’s all?”
“Looks like it.”
“Okay.” As she pulled back, he saw Hannah watching them. He tossed off a wave and left the shop, feeling pretty good about himself.
Chapter Twelve
In spite of the three Advil she took after work, Janie’s ankle still throbbed. She knew she had worked too hard at the shop today, but she was determined to show her mother that it wasn’t as bad as it seemed.
After that all she wanted was to come home, crawl into bed, pull the sheets over her head and shut out the world. Of course her mother wanted to know what her banker, Victor, and she had talked about, and of course, Janie didn’t tell her.
Instead she had gone to the storage room, popped some Advil and soldiered on: working, pulling shots when she could, bantering with the customers and with Hannah. Then, just after supper, she had taken an extra dose of Advil, and as a result, her head was now buzzing from the pills.
“Suzie, can you get my mug from the living room?” she called out, suddenly remembering the cup she had left there when she had come home from work. Her mini vacation. Drinking tea for five minutes.
“I thought I was done helping.” Suzie’s petulant voice grated on Janie’s already-fragile nerves. Why did she bother getting Suzie to help?
Because Luke was right—as much as it bothered her to admit it. She needed to get the kids to help more.
“Just do it, Suzie.”
Suzie’s sigh was out of proportion to the work she had to do, but Janie ignored it and thankfully Suzie headed to the living room.
Once again Janie’s eyes flitted to the holiday trailer parked in the yard beside them. The lights were on. Luke must be finishing supper. When he was done, he would probably go work in the house as he usually did. And then what? Go to bed? Wake up and do it all over again?
And when he was finally done?
Janie’s heart fluttered in her chest as her emotions veered from resolve to longing. She felt as if she hovered on the edge of a place that, once entered, she could never leave.
Smart. She was playing it smart.
Suzie’s noisy return pulled her back to the here and now. She opened the dishwasher, put the cup in and then, to Janie’s surprise, rinsed out the dishrag and wiped the counters.
“Thanks for doing that, honey,” Janie said.
Suzie threw the rag in the sink, lingered a moment, then turned to her mom.
“Theresa Springfield is having a party in a couple of weeks. She asked me to go. Can I?”
“Birthday party?”
“Um, yeah.” Suzie’s hesitation and the way she wouldn’t meet Janie’s eyes sent warnings jangling like a bell choir through Janie’s head. She highly doubted, knowing the little bit she did about Theresa and the Springfield clan in general, that the party would include cake and party hats and a benign game of pin the tail on the donkey.
“You hardly know Theresa. You just started hanging out the past couple of months.” Which was a couple of months too long. Janie suspected Theresa had much to do with the magazines Janie had found tucked under Suzie’s mattress. She knew she had to confront her on that matter sooner or later.
“She’s my friend, Mom.”
“Then she’ll understand when you tell her your mom said no. And for now, I’d like you to tidy the living room and sweep the front step.” Janie rested her leg on the kitchen chair as she rinsed the dinner plate before putting it in the dishwasher.
Luke’s comment about getting her kids to help had made her rethink her ongoing strategy with her children. She knew Suzie needed to take on more responsibility. As Autumn and Todd grew older, Janie would need help. Maybe there’d even be a day she would need her help in the coffee shop.
It won’t be around by then.
Janie pushed that thought down hard and fast. She couldn’t think about that today.
“I brought you your mug. I wiped the counters. Why are you making me work so hard?” Suzie shoved her hands into the pockets of her jeans, glaring at her mother. “I have homework to do.”
“I’m just asking for some help. I can’t do all that work myself.” Janie bit back a sigh. She didn’t remember Luke having this much trouble getting Suzie to pitch in. Of course Luke didn’t have the built-in guilt buttons Janie had where Suzie was concerned. Buttons that Suzie was often unaware she pushed.
“I think Todd should help.”
Patience, Lord. I could use some patience right now. “Todd is cleaning up Autumn’s room.”
“Why couldn’t I clean up Autumn’s room?” Suzie whined.
Janie purposely kept her gaze ahead, fighting to hold on to her temper. She couldn’t get angry with Suzie. If she did, all the frustration of the past week, the past month, my goodness, the past few years, would all come raining down on her unsuspecting daughter’s head.
“Please just do what I asked, Suzie.”
Suzie’s sigh was like a blast of chill air, but Janie didn’t acknowledge it. Soon she heard Suzie’s footsteps stomping up the stairs.
Janie turned on the dishwasher and gingerly made her way across the kitchen to the laundry room.
It took her a few minutes to shove the basket of wet laundry along the floor and out onto the deck. Every step, however, was fraught with anxiety. The deck board Luke had stepped through wasn’t the only rotten one.
Fifteen minutes later, the clothes swung gently in the evening breeze and Janie collapsed onto a plastic chair, resting her ankle. She just needed a moment to catch her breath, corral her thoughts.
<
br /> She had to get the kids in bed, make lunches for tomorrow, mend Suzie’s dance outfit and pay some bills from her over-drawn checking account.
Dread clutched her midsection with icy fingers.
You can ask your father for help.
Janie shook her head as if to dislodge the pernicious voice. Owen had done that enough. She was never going to follow in her ex-husband’s footsteps.
But her pride had a cost, and it seemed she was paying it now. She was running out of options.
Let it go. Leave it be.
A sigh sifted out of her as the thought took hold. So much could be resolved if she simply let go. Stopped fighting.
And then what? Find a job in Riverbend? Work for someone else?
How would she support her children? Keep her house? Dread washed over her at the thought of losing the coffee shop and moving into an apartment. She tried to find her footing, tried to find the positive, but the panic took over and, combined with the pain in her ankle, broke down her defenses.
She laid her head against the house.
I can’t do this anymore, Lord, she prayed. I simply can’t. Please help me get through this.
A cold wet nose pushed itself against her arm and Janie screamed, her prayer forgotten. She pulled back.
“How did you get out?” she said to Cooper, smiling in spite of her wavering emotions. “Does Luke know you’re here?”
Cooper didn’t move.
“Go on. Luke wants you back.” Janie gave him a gentle push in the direction of the yard.
But Cooper just sat there. He emitted a thin whine, as if commiserating with her. Janie gave up and leaned back again, resting her hand on Cooper’s neck.
She took a long, slow breath. Abdominal breathing. Was supposed to help her relax.
Instead, as she breathed, and stroked Cooper in time to her breaths, she felt sorrow thickening her throat. She swallowed. If she started crying now, she wouldn’t stop.
“My life is falling apart,” she said quietly, talking to the dog. “I had such good plans. But it’s all coming apart as quickly as my deck. I’m in trouble with the bank, and I don’t know if I can afford to stay in this house.”
Cooper pushed his head onto her lap as she unburdened herself, telling him things she hadn’t been willing or able to tell anyone else.
The dog snorted, as if he understood, and Janie gave in to an impulse and laid her head down on his. His head was silky and warm, and Janie felt the beginnings of a sob fill her throat. Cooper licked her hand, and a tear trickled down her cheek onto his head.
“What am I going to do?” Another tear followed, and as Janie reached up to wipe it away, she caught a movement below her.
She turned her head to see Luke standing on the ground beside her deck.
“Hi there,” he said, his voice quiet. “I see you found my dog or, rather, he found you.”
At the sound of Luke’s voice, Cooper turned but didn’t move.
Janie surreptitiously wiped the tears off her cheek. Had he heard what she said?
“What’s the matter?” he asked, thankfully staying where he was.
The concern in his voice was almost her undoing. “Nothing. I’m fine.”
“Really?” He took a step closer and sat on the edge of the deck. He pulled at one of the boards, loosening it easily. “Level with me, Janie. You don’t have anyone coming to fix your deck, do you?”
He was persistent, she gave him that. “No, I don’t,” she admitted, realizing he would find out soon enough when no one showed up.
Luke sighed. “I did break it. I feel I should fix it.”
“Anyone could have broken it.”
“Well, I did.” He wiggled the board. “And look. I did it again. And since you don’t have anyone else to work on it and since I have this extra lumber, why won’t you let me fix it? I’ll come when the kids are in bed. They won’t even know I’m here.”
“They’ll hear you.”
And I’ll know you’re here. Doing things Owen would never even consider doing. Being helpful and considerate. Worming your way into my life.
As you already have.
Luke was about to protest once more when Cooper lifted his head, emitted two sharp barks, then bounded toward the porch door.
“Well, well, well. There you two are.” Dodie stuck her head out the door, the lilt in her voice full of innuendo.
“Luke was just leaving.” Janie got to her feet.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay for a cup of tea, Luke? I just bought a new blend at a cute tea-seller at a Farmer’s Market in Whitecourt.”
“Luke doesn’t drink tea,” Janie said decisively.
“So what brings you here, Luke?” Dodie asked, ignoring her sister.
“He wants to fix Mommy’s deck,” Todd called out from the window above them. “And I want to help him.”
Janie was flooded with a mixture of embarrassment and anger with her young son for eavesdropping. How long had he been listening?
“It needs fixing, that’s for sure,” Dodie said. “You want a hand?”
“No fair, Aunt Dodie. I want to help,” Todd called out.
Dodie stepped out onto the lawn. “We can both help,” she called out, looking up.
“That will be fun.”
Janie glanced from Dodie to Luke, feeling as if she’d been shanghaied.
“I’ll stop by tomorrow night,” Luke said, interpreting her hesitation for approval.
Just then Todd joined them outside. “You’ll let me help, won’t you, Luke?”
The hopeful note in her son’s voice got her. Luke had done what she couldn’t. Gotten Todd out of his shell. Pulled Todd out of his world of books and reading that she had mistakenly assumed was a positive but which had, instead, been an escape.
“Of course I will.” Luke kept his gaze on Janie as if seeking confirmation. “If it’s okay with your mom.”
It seemed she had no choice.
“That would be okay,” she said quietly.
“Great. I’ll be by tomorrow night. After supper.”
“So you coming in for tea?” Dodie pressed.
“No. I don’t want to overstay my welcome.” Luke gave Janie a wry smile. Then he whistled for Cooper and, together, they left.
Dodie sighed. “He’s one great guy, Janie. I can’t see how you can just let him walk away.”
Janie poked her sister, then inclined her head toward Todd, who was watching Cooper, but she was sure, listening to them.
“He’s just next door” was all Janie would say.
“Good thing,” Dodie replied.
“Todd, you should get back to your bedroom. I’ll come up to tuck you in right away.”
Todd waited a moment, watching Luke and Cooper; then he turned to Janie. “I’m glad he’s coming back,” he said, grinning. He trotted off, the picture of contentment.
“So, did Mom send you here, or are you here on your own?” Janie asked as the door fell shut behind him.
“Got bored with my own company. Thought I would see what’s happening here.” Dodie glanced over to Luke’s yard, watching with Janie as the lights flicked on in his trailer. “And it’s a good thing I came.”
“I suppose I can thank you for that,” Janie said wryly.
“You weren’t going to let him help you, were you?” Dodie asked, suddenly serious. “You would prefer to let this deck rot away?”
“I have my reasons,” Janie said, disliking the prim note creeping into her voice.
“Dumb reasons,” Dodie retorted. “He’s a great guy, and he is great with the kids.”
Dodie wasn’t giving her new information. But things were never as cut-and-dried as her sister thought.
Luke held a fantasy view of her complex and messy life and given how he spoke of his mother, he had his own issues.
“Do you see that trailer on the yard? That’s where Luke lives,” she said with more force than necessary. “Do you see that house? Once he’s fixed it up, he
’s selling it. He’s moving on, Dodie. He’s not sticking around. And he doesn’t go to church. Doesn’t share the same values I do. There’s too much that doesn’t fit or work.” She caught her breath after her little speech, not liking the smile forming around Dodie’s mouth.
“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?” Dodie raised her eyebrows in question. “Because I think you’re scared that he’s sneaking into your heart.”
Janie felt Dodie’s words battering at her defenses. She had to hold on. Had to shore them up. She had nothing to fall back on if he hurt her. Left her.
“And you’re such an expert on relationships,” she snapped, her words sharp and hard, deflating the hope that had shone in Dodie’s face. “You’ve had so many boyfriends.”
Dodie reared back, and even before she was finished speaking, Janie wished she could snatch her words back.
“I’m sorry, Dodie. I should never—”
“I’ve got to go.” Dodie’s voice was quiet. As she turned away, Janie felt like a traitor. She had struck out to defend herself and in the process had hurt her sister.
As Dodie left, Janie pressed her hands to her face. Forgive me, Lord, she prayed. I’m turning into a miserable old woman, pushing everyone away. I don’t want to be that woman, but I don’t know what else to do.
She waited a moment, gathering her thoughts.
But just before she shuffled into the house and back to her obligations, she shot one last look over her shoulder at Luke’s trailer. The lights were on, and she wondered what he was doing in there. All alone.
Chapter Thirteen
“No one came to work on the house today?” Janie stood in the doorway, watching Luke and Todd as they pounded nails into the fresh, white boards that were part of her new deck.
Luke pounded another nail in and sat back on his feet. “The crew staged a revolt last night. Said they weren’t going to work on weekends anymore. Slackers.” Though he threw out the comment with a smile, he felt again the smolder of anger he’d experienced when Bert gave him the news.
Before he came, the crew was working at half capacity, yet he was paying them a full wage. He was still trying to make up for lost productivity during that time. They were at least a couple of days behind on the job. Though it was Saturday, Luke had worked all morning and afternoon, trying to get done what he could on his own. For a moment he had thought about not fixing this deck. Janie didn’t want him around anyhow, but he had said he would come.
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