He didn’t want dinner. Wasn’t the least bit hungry. He wanted to go home and wallow in his anger and hurt. He wanted to go back in time and do things differently. He should have stayed away from Missy. He’d known she’d be nothing but trouble. And he’d been right. They could write that on his damn tombstone when he died: He was right. Too bad he hadn’t listened to himself. Would have saved him a world of hurt.
Of course, he’d never have known the sublime pleasure of sex with Missy either. The way her eyes darkened when she was aroused. The soft little sounds she made when she was getting close to coming. How her nails dug into his ass when he fucked her hard and fast.
Shit. He had to stop thinking about her. He was getting a hard-on while he was in mixed company. Not good.
“I really should go.” Home to his empty apartment. To the silence broken only by the sound of the television. Not that he’d ever been lonely before. But then he’d never had anything to miss.
He could always get out his little black book and call a female friend or hit a bar and find a willing woman. His erection promptly died. Well, shit. Seemed his little buddy didn’t want any woman but Missy. And wasn’t that a kick in the pants.
He was well and truly screwed. Missy meant more to him than he wanted to admit. Somehow she’d gotten beneath his barriers and made him start to believe in miracles. He knew better.
Candy turned her pleading brown eyes on him and he knew he was sunk. “Stay.” She didn’t wait for a reply but tugged him toward the kitchen. “Lucas made the best chocolate cake in the world yesterday and there’s still some left. It won’t take me long to make some coffee to go with it.”
Almost two hours later, T.S. unlocked his front door and let himself into his home. The low hum of the refrigerator was the only sound to break up the quiet. He closed the door and locked it.
Missy hadn’t been here often, maybe three or four times. He much preferred to go to her place. It felt more like a home. His apartment was just a place to sleep and eat and watch television.
He kicked off his boots and hung up his jacket, staring at the barren walls. He’d lived here for years but hadn’t bothered to do much beyond move in furniture, his books and music. Oh, the place was a showpiece in terms of architecture and finishes. He had granite countertops in the kitchen and stainless steel appliances.
But none of that mattered.
The apartment was empty. Just like him.
“Shit.” He dragged his fingers through his hair in frustration and tried not to think about Missy. He didn’t want to know how she was doing or what she was doing. “Liar,” he muttered.
The phone rang and his heart began to race. Maybe it was Missy. And maybe he’d won the damn lottery. He didn’t think so. Common sense prevailed and reminded him it was probably his mother. He was supposed to have called her tonight.
He could have let the machine get it but that would be too cowardly. He plucked up the receiver. “Hi.”
“Theo, how are you?” His mother’s warm voice washed over him. No matter what else he could say about his crappy life, his mother had always been there for him, always done her best.
“I’m okay. Sorry I didn’t call earlier. I was out. Just got in.” He turned the conversation around to her. “How are things with you?”
He listened with half an ear as she chatted about the goings-on in the neighborhood and the wonderful day shopping, she and her friend, Dotty, from the apartment next door had had. “That’s great, Mama,” he added when she finished speaking.
She paused and, even over the phone lines, he could hear her thinking hard before she spoke. “I do not like to interfere in your life, Theo,” she began.
“I know. And I appreciate it.”
“But,” she continued, “you do not sound happy, my son.”
“It’s nothing.” No way was he talking about Missy to his mother. “Listen, I’ve got to go.”
“Okay.” Her voice was soft with understanding. “But I am here for you if you need me.”
His chest tightened and his voice was rough with emotion when he finally answered. “I know, Mama. You always were.” He hung up the phone and headed to the bathroom. He was dirty and sweaty after a day’s work. But more than that, he needed to wash away this day.
Fifteen minutes later, he flung himself down on his bed. Naked, he lay there in the dark trying not to think. It didn’t work.
He wondered what Missy was doing and if she was having better luck than he was not thinking about them.
Chapter Eleven
“You can’t go on like this.”
Missy looked up and found Candy standing in the doorway to her office. She didn’t pretend not to understand what her friend was talking about. It had been a week since she’d last seen T.S. One long, unending week.
God, how she missed him. His sense of humor, his steadiness, his hard hands on her body in the middle of the night. Stop it, she admonished herself. She did miss the sex and the closeness that came after it, but she missed much more than that. She missed eating dinner with him, talking to him about her day. He always had a different way of seeing things that helped her figure out what to do with a problem.
Heck, she’d even missed Sunday afternoon football with him. She’d sat in front of the screen, dry-eyed and alone, unable not to watch it. Which wasn’t good.
T.S. had become an integral part of her life when she hadn’t been looking.
“You’re losing weight and you were already skinny. If you weren’t my best friend I’d have to hate you for that. I eat when I’m depressed.” Missy managed to smile at her friend, knowing she meant well. Candy had been pushing all manner of food and baked goods on her for the past week, but Missy couldn’t work up any enthusiasm for any of them. Not even Lucas’ famous killer brownies.
Candy pushed away from the doorframe and closed the door behind her. “Call him. Go see him. Talk to him.” No need for her to say who he was. They both knew.
Tears pricked Missy’s eyes. She had to do something. She couldn’t keep going on this way. She wasn’t sleeping, her stomach was constantly in knots and a deep emptiness filled her.
She’d done a lot of thinking this past week. She hadn’t realized how focused and regimented her life had become until she’d met T.S. She’d come to the unhappy conclusion that she’d allowed a set of goals to eclipse her life. Goals were good, but not at the expense of living. And that’s what she’d essentially been doing. She’d put off her life, foolishly thinking everything would fall into place as soon as she’d reached a certain goal.
Talk about a control freak.
She’d accepted that she’d needed that rigid sense of control and order in the beginning. But she wasn’t a frightened young girl anymore trying to put her past behind her and make something of herself. She was an independent, financially secure woman. It was time to start acting like it.
“You’re right.”
Candy’s eyes widened. “I am? I mean, of course I am.”
Her friend had refrained from mentioning T.S. all week, but now Missy had to ask. “How is he?”
“Hurt. Angry.” Candy didn’t pull any punches.
Missy sucked in a breath. She ached for him, for the pain she’d caused. It didn’t matter where their relationship ended up and, after waiting a week to talk to him, Missy was under no illusions that they even had one any longer. But she owed it to him to talk to him like an adult.
She shoved away from her desk. She could afford to take an early lunch considering how many extra hours she’d put in this past week. This wasn’t going to be easy, but it was necessary. And long overdue.
She retrieved her purse from her desk drawer and slipped on her coat. “Do you know where he is?”
“At the apartment. It’s the final day. He took a few days off to check on the other projects his company is handling.” Candy placed her hand on Missy’s arm. “Be sure you know what you want. I don’t want either one of you hurt any more than you already have been.�
��
Missy hugged her friend. “I’m so sorry to put you in the middle of this.”
“That’s okay. But I love you both and want you happy.”
Missy didn’t think that was possible. “I don’t know about happy, but we’ll have sorted this out once and for all.”
* * * * *
T.S. toured the apartment, checking on every inch of the place. It was perfect. No need for him to stay any longer. No excuse for him to be here in hopes Missy might drop by to see Candy.
Not that he was doing that. Not really.
He stomped out into the main room where both Justin and Lucas were waiting for him. “It’s done.”
“It sure is. You did a hell of a job.” Justin held out his hand. “Thanks. I can’t wait to move in.”
T.S. took it. “I had some good help.”
Justin laughed. “Unskilled labor is more like it.” He slapped his hand on T.S.’ back. “I gotta go pack my stuff and buy some furniture to put in this place.”
When Justin was gone, T.S. turned to his friend. “If you need anything else give me a call.”
Lucas said nothing, but continued to stare patiently at him. The bastard. T.S. held up his hands. “I’m not talking about it. It’s done. It’s finished.” And that thought was what kept the knot in his gut twisted tight.
“Have you tried to talk to her?” Lucas leaned against the living room wall and crossed one foot over the other as if settling in for the long haul. T.S. was having none of it.
“Nope. Missy made it clear we were finished. Done.”
“You know she has control issues just like you do. Some guys call her the ice-queen.” Lucas threw that statement out of left field, shocking T.S.
Before he could tell his friend how untrue that asinine statement was, he heard a noise behind him. He glanced over his shoulder and froze. Missy was standing there, her hands clenching her purse. She looked slightly pale, but composed.
Shit, had she heard what Lucas said? By the look on her face he’d say that was a definite yes.
Lucas came away from the wall. “Hey, Missy.”
“Hi.” She motioned in his direction. “Do you mind if I talk to T.S.? Alone.”
“No problem.” Lucas headed out, pausing long enough to drop a kiss on Missy’s cheek. It was an innocent gesture of friendship, but it made him curl his hands into fists at his sides. When he realized what he was doing he made himself relax, flexing his stiff fingers. Missy could kiss whoever she wanted.
Acid churned in his gut at the thought of another man in bed with her.
Outwardly betraying none of his feelings, he crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for Lucas to leave and close the door behind him. Missy turned to him and tried to smile. It fell flat.
“What do you want?” His voice was gruffer than he’d intended and she flinched slightly before straightening her shoulders.
“I wanted to apologize for what I said the other day. I shouldn’t have reacted like that. I should have asked for your side of the story. I’m sorry.”
A week ago that would have meant everything to him. But now, he was so frozen inside it could barely even make a dent in his newly erected walls. “Apology accepted.” He started to leave. He couldn’t bear being this close to Missy and not touch her.
He tried to brush past her, but she stopped him dead in his tracks when she put her hand on his arm. His biceps flexed and swelled as his muscles tightened. He turned his face toward her and cocked one eyebrow in question.
Her cheeks flushed, but she appeared determined. “I’m sorry for the pain I caused you, T.S. The only excuse I have is that I had a gut reaction due to my past. That wasn’t fair to you. To either of us.” Her fingers tightened and he could feel the heat of her hand soaking through his shirt and into his skin.
With every breath he took he inhaled her sweet smell, a combination of soap and lotion she used. He’d come to know it well. If Missy glanced down at the front of his jeans she’d know he was as hard as a post.
His instantaneous arousal made him angry and he lashed out. “I’m glad you figured it all out.”
Missy frowned. “What happened, T.S.? Why were you in prison?”
The words were on the tip of his tongue but he swallowed them back. “Considering we’re done, I don’t think you need to know.” No way was he opening himself up to satisfy her curiosity. A guy had to have some pride.
Instead of moving away from him, Missy shifted closer. Her body brushed his. Even through the thickness of her coat, he could feel her heat. His fingers itched to stroke her curves and pull her tight against him. The sexual heat that always seemed to be simmering between them whenever they were in the same room was still there. That hadn’t changed in the past week.
“T.S.” She said his name. Nothing more.
The loneliness. The anger. The disappointment. The pure sexual need of the past week all collided together at once. She was here and he’d missed her. So damn much. He hated how much he’d missed her.
He gripped her shoulders and pulled her toward him. He half expected her to fight him when he captured her mouth. She surged toward him instead, meeting him halfway.
This was no gentle kiss. He didn’t have that in him. Not now. He wanted her to the point of madness. He drove his tongue into her mouth, moaning when he tasted the sweet, moist cavern.
His fingers were busy and he had her coat open and off in a heartbeat. Her purse landed with a thump beside it. Missy twined her arms around his neck as he continued to plunder her mouth. He sucked her tongue hard and moaned when she scraped her teeth over his.
He backed her up against the wall and grabbed her leg, pulling high and tight to his hip. Missy arched her hips and ground them against his cock. T.S. was lost in a swirling mass of need. He had to have her. Now.
Missy couldn’t think. Couldn’t breathe. Not with T.S. kissing her like she was the very air he needed to survive. He’d been so cold, so distant. For a moment she’d been afraid he was simply going to walk away from her.
The warm lover she’d grown to know so well had been nowhere in sight. In his place had been a cold, distant man. She’d done that to him. It hurt her to think she’d been responsible for such pain.
They hadn’t settled things yet. She still didn’t know what had happened. How he’d ended up in prison. But that didn’t matter now. Time enough to talk about that later. She was in his arms where she belonged. And he was in hers.
The wall was hard against her back, but T.S. was even harder against her front. His cock was hard and full against her sex as she worked her hips. Even through her skirt, she could feel him pressing against her clit. Heat and need suffused her. She had to get closer to him.
Her fingers tore at his T-shirt, yanking it from the waistband of his jeans. She pushed beneath it and her hands found warm slabs of flesh. T.S. was ripped, every muscle hard and delineated. She stroked upward and found his flat nipples. He pulled his mouth from hers and swore when she dragged her thumbs over the hard points.
His breathing was as ragged as hers. He stared down at her, his eyes blazing with desire. There was no warning before he gripped the sides of her blouse and tugged. Buttons pinged off the floor and wall as the material was ripped open.
He didn’t bother to undo her bra, but pushed it up, exposing the dark mounds. He made a sound in the back of his throat, much like a wounded moan, before swooping down to capture one tight nipple in his mouth. His tongue laved the tip as his teeth held it gently captive.
She couldn’t touch him enough, get close enough.
T.S. released the taut bud and blew. She shivered and gasped, trying to tug him back to her breast. He nuzzled his way to the other one and went to work.
Missy’s fingers found his belt buckle, fumbling with it until it came free. The button of his jeans was no problem. The zipper was next.
His erection brushed the back of her fingers through his boxer briefs. He was hard and hot and more than ready.
“To
uch me,” he commanded. He pushed his erection against her hand.
Missy shoved the material out of her way and closed her fingers around him. They both moaned as he pulsed against her. She licked her lips, wanting to taste him.
He took a half step back and she went to her knees in front of him. His fingers tangled in her hair as he angled his cock toward her lips. The dark blue veins running up and down the thick shaft throbbed with need and the plum-shaped head was dark and wet.
Missy licked at the tip, tasting the salty liquid seeping from it. She pumped her hand up and down his hard length, continuing to tease his cock head with her tongue and lips. She kissed and laved, licking it like it was a treat long denied.
“Suck me.” He pressed the tip against her lips and she parted them, taking him into her mouth. “Fuck, yes.” He started flexing his hips, driving his cock deeper into her mouth. She moved her hand up on his shaft, controlling the depth of his thrusts.
She raked her teeth softly over him, teasing, taunting. Her breasts ached so she rubbed them against his jean-clad thighs. The rough material felt wonderful against her peaked nipples.
Capturing his testicles with her free hand, she gently squeezed. They were tight and full.
T.S. pulled back suddenly, his cock coming out of her mouth with a wet pop. He yanked her to her feet and thrust her against the wall. His hands roughly shoved her skirt around her waist and his fingers delved between her thighs. She was wearing stockings so the only barrier was her underwear.
Thin, delicate material ripped. Then he was touching her where she needed it most. He stroked the slick folds of her pussy before pressing inside. A low, keening sound broke from her throat. She was so ready. She needed him.
“Theo.” He jerked at the sound of his name. For a brief second she thought he might say something. Then the moment was gone. He lifted her leg, opening her even more for his touch. She felt the head of his cock against her slit and then he was pushing inside. There was no hesitation. He kept going until he was buried as far as he could go.
MacNamarasLady Page 12
