by Cat Mann
****
My finals started at the beginning of June and they were tedious and ridiculously difficult. I cussed August out for three days straight. The tests and essays were next to impossible. August spent an entire day grading my exams, but when he finished he reported that I had received all A’s for the semester. He would turn my report into Wheatin Prep where I would officially be receiving my diploma.
“Ava,” he said with a huge grin, “you graduated at the top of your class. Do you have any idea how many people are going to be pissed when they find out that some shut-in they’ve never seen before has beat them to Valedictorian?”
“I am not a shut-in August, and I don’t care what they think about it. And just for the record, I will not be attending any ceremonies.”
“Ugh. Whatever, Ava. Are you never just happy?”
I gave him a mean stare, refusing to answer his stupid question, but allowed myself to be talked into going to Riverside Café for a small celebration and a surprise graduation gift, a gift certificate for one free tattoo at Jake’s.
“Aw shucks, August, you shouldn’t have!” I said with a laugh, already thinking about what fantastic art I might find for my right arm.
It was a very strange feeling knowing that I had graduated from high school and the only thing on my horizon was the fact that I had to kill two more Kakos brothers before one of them killed me. I sent a text to Margaux letting her know that I had graduated, but she didn’t bother to respond.
After my mini-celebration, I fell asleep on my box springs. That night No. 5 came to me in my dreams. His plan was to play with fire.
I had less than twenty hours to decide how to respond to the idea of fire and get my counter plan in order. The attack I had seen in my dream would be awful and I’ll admit I was terrified. I woke August in the morning and told him to pack only the necessities. Taking in the somber tone of my voice, he immediately did as I said. I packed most of my stuff too, tucking Ari’s sweatshirt into a top corner of my bag. Then I gave my things to August and sent him off to Jake’s place with all he could carry of what we both owned. I told him to wait there for me, but I was purposefully vague on the details.
I closed the door to my room, unlatched the oval pane of glass over my little window seat and doused the apartment floor with kerosene. The smell of it lay heavy in the air, but I wasn't going to give the Kakos brother time to consider what might be going on. I left the flat, pulled the door shut and pushed myself as far as I could into the recessed doorway of the next vacant flat down the hall. I settled down to wait.
The waiting went on well into the late evening hours. My shoulders ached and my knees cramped from time to time with the effort of staying in the doorway’s shadows, but finally I heard the creak of the elevator cables as the car started its journey up from the foyer downstairs. I tensed and watched as No. 5 hesitated in the open car before he headed for my door. In his hand was a can of gasoline.
The moment he disappeared into the front room of my flat, I moved soundlessly forward and used my key to engage the dead bolt, locking him in my apartment. I ran lightly down the back steps and left the building. I climbed the three stories of the building’s outside fire escape and peeked carefully into my flat through the oval window I had unlatched. I could see No. 5 standing outside the closed door to my room. Ever so carefully, I pushed the window forward, pulled myself into the room, and perched on my window seat. I watched as he wedged a chair under the doorknob of my room to trap what he thought was me in the bedroom.
I cleared my throat to get his attention. He turned, saw me and let out a gasp. He made an involuntary forward movement, causing gasoline to splash out of his can and run down his knees and ankles – not a lot of gasoline, but enough to get the job done. I lit a matchbook, flicked it at him, and watched as his pant legs caught on fire. He dropped to the kerosene soaked floor in a panic and started to roll around in an attempt to extinguish the flames. The rest of the flat caught quickly. The fire was hot; it ripped through the furniture and peeled the paint off the walls. I watched as the skin on No. 5’s face began to bubble and shrivel, then quickly left back though my window to the fire escape and made my descent to the alleyway below. Not even ten minutes passed before the entire building, engulfed in flames, collapsed.
I walked with my back to my burning building as people hollered on the streets to one another and stared on at the spectacle behind me. I could hear in the distance the wail of fire engines. Without looking back, I made my way to Jake’s and used my gift from August to have a fifth tally mark tattooed on my left wrist. It stretched diagonally across the other four. August and I said goodbye to Jake and made our way to Heathrow.
I bought two one-way tickets to LAX, with no layover, and we boarded the next flight to California. I still had No. 6 in the back of my mind but I missed Ari too much to be able to think about anything else.
The flight was brutal. I was sick and shaky from the shock of what I had done. I had not slept in days and I was so worked up about going home that I could not sleep on the plane. Instead, I clutched the armrest so tight that my knuckles were white and my fingers ached with cramps. My eyes were bloodshot, my pulse was racing, my lips trembled, and my feet bounced about. When we finally touched down in L.A, I called Margaux’s car service company, and had a car meet us at the door.
August and I arrived at Ari’s house in the late afternoon. We walked up the back steps and onto their magnificent deck. There was a dull red stain on the patio where I had nearly bled to death so many months ago. I suppressed the chill that ran up my back, then entered through the sliding glass doors into the kitchen, with August at my heels. I spied Aggie sitting at the island. Her hair was short and she was thin, but she was looking much better than the last time I had seen her.
“Hi.” My voice was raw and scratchy. Aggie turned around, startled.
“Oh, Ava!” she cried as she got up and pulled me into her arms in a warm embrace. I let go of the little bit of strength I had left and sobbed. I cried harder than I had in months. She pulled me back and wiped my tears. “Ava Baby, look at you, when is the last time you ate?” I shrugged my shoulders and hugged her again, not ever wanting to let go.
I was home.
“I’m so sorry I hurt you, Aggie. I didn’t mean what I said.”
“Oh, Ava Baby, we know that. Don’t cry for me, honey, I’m just so happy you’re home again.”
I got the sense that August was starting to feel uncomfortable so I wiped the rest of the tears from my face, “Aggie, this is my friend August. Is it ok if we stay here for a few days?”
Her eyes grew large, “Just a few days?” she asked sadly.
“Yeah, I’m not done yet; I just couldn’t stay away any longer … is Ari home?” I asked in a pathetically small voice.
“No, Ari’s at school. He’s working on his last exam this afternoon, but he should be home in a few hours. Why don’t you go clean up and take a nap and then you can surprise him.” She said the last part with a smile. “August, I think Julia is home next door. If you want, I can walk you over there,” she offered and August cheerfully accepted.
I made my way down the hallway and raided Aggie’s linen closet. I pulled out my favorite kind of shampoo and conditioner, some body wash, a razor and lotion and headed to the guest bathroom. I scrubbed away months of anguish and anxiety. I wrapped myself in a towel, grabbed my bag, and made my way to Ari’s room. I opened his door and the scent of freshly cut grass, sea and summertime overcame me. It was intoxicating. I began to feel woozy and light headed. I was able to get on a camisole and a matching pair of panties before I came toppling down onto Ari’s bed and sunk, lifeless into his sea of blankets and pillows.
